text=How did this music get past the censors? Who greenlighted this project at the Official Electronic Music Genre Standards and Classifications Consortium? I'm still at a loss as to what it's trying to do. Is it funky? No. Those dulled basslines sound like someone farting into a pillow. Or like the school teacher in the Charlie Brown cartoons scolding some child for his inability to spit, sing and gargle at the same time. Is it soulful? No. Time-stretched vocals never had any appeal, ever. There's no real hook, no real melody. It doesn't even pay any decent homage to Classic Garage. So what the hell is this stuff doing?! Sucking, by the sounds of it. But as bad as it sounds, it has actually managed to find a way to get WORSE over the years, dumping the time-stretched vocals in favour of......you guessed it: those annoying, crooning Mariah Carey wannabe diva hooks. Oh, fucking hell.
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