Higherfunctions
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		The wind bent the world sideways. The wind could do that here. It didn't have to follow the rules that bound it in the real world. Nothing had to follow the rules here. That was why she liked it.
		He was content now, coiled tight around her finger. Yesterday the story would have been different. But he'd died twice since then. And she was the only one who cared enough to save him. So no more broken promises. Ever.
		Long ago there was a child. A child that didn't like being human and that didn't like being part of the real world. So one day he took himself up and looked at the whole of reality. And reality bent.
		He was bored of being a cat. And he'd tried being human but that hadn't suited him at all. He opened wide to give a final feline yawn. There were better animals to be, he was sure. Reality stretched. Quack, quack.
		The birds swam lazily across the sky. Things were much easier now that gravity did what they told it. Clouds rippled like water and mountains reconsidered their options. It was a good life for ducks.
		You've cheated. How else could you have seen me? The only rule that matters here is the one you've just broken. Play the game right or don't play at all. Go back to the real world. You're no longer welcome here.
		She held the treasure up to her eye. It was an engagement ring. There were tiny words inscribed on its golden surface. She recognised them from the piece of paper he'd left for her. 'No more broken promises.'
		The old world was scared. Too many were choosing to leave it behind. He was scared too, but that was just a phase to be worked through. He'd never liked being human. This was too good an opportunity to resist.
		Nothing happened in the world today. Nothing. But. Well, I met someone in the street. We're going to dinner tonight. That's all. There isn't any news. Why are you even bothering to watch this?
		It was all shit. Suddenly I could tell. He was going to leave me. I... I couldn't be alone again. So I killed him. And buried his body in the garden. There's no time. Why am I even bothering to say this?
		Nothing happened in the world today. Nothing happened yesterday. Our current affairs analyst predicts that nothing will happen tomorrow. There isn't any news. Why are you even bothering to watch this?
		I'm going. I can't take reality anymore. I can't be alone anymore. I want to be part of a world where things still happen. It's time. I can feel the wind. There isn't any news. Get out while you can.
		Nothing happened in the world today. Nothing happened yesterday. Things haven't changed. Everywhere is the same as it was before. There isn't any news. Why are you even bothering to watch this?
		His corpse lay grinning in the clearing. The sun was already working on the body, pulling it back towards the real world. She pitied those that had stayed behind. Tomorrow they'd have one more liar to deal with.
		It blew him away. He couldn't pull his usual shit here. The elements wouldn't stand for it. Whenever he opened his mouth a gale would spring up to swallow his words. In the end, he just gave up.
		He aged. His eyes became broken glass. His mouth became a vortex. He missed being a child but he didn't miss being human. He was the first new thing. In time, the other world found its form around him.
		He thought he'd be dead for good this time, but no. His body started changing as soon as he was in the earth. The other world hadn't quite given up on him yet. He was still someone's treasure.
		Reality shifted and the paper was gone. Now her hands were digging. Pushing dead grass and fallen leaves aside. Scraping through the topsoil. A little further down and her fingers touched metal. Treasure.
		Where do these things begin? It's a very human question. Just don't expect a human to answer. You can see the street twisting, eager to be free. But that's not how it started. It started when reality bent.
		Another building was trying to leave. No one paid them much attention anymore. A brief struggle and then the structure was on its way, melting up into the other world. Reality offered only token resistance.
		They met on a street that was nearly gone. He smiled. She smiled. They talked. The rest of the street moved out of reality but neither of them noticed. They set a date to meet again. Tonight.
		An office could become a castle. Or an Igloo. A Street could become a river or a river become a street. All things could become their own set of building blocks here. And eventually, all things did.
		When enough people crossed over at the same time, whole office blocks would follow. The buildings didn't want to be left behind anymore than the animals did. Everything wanted to be part of the next phase.
		The cat wasn't phased by the change in his surroundings. He just sat and watched the woman dig for treasure. When he grew bored, he simply let the wind blow him further. Gradually, his thoughts turned to ducks.
		I won't ever leave you. We'll be together from tonight until forever. You and me for all time. All you have to do is trust me. And then you will trust me. And then you'll love me. And then I'll leave you.
		The piece of paper had been left worn and delicate from frequent folding. She unfolded it with care, shifting her concentration to her hands and letting the wind blow the rest of her gently out of phase.