- Saffron Globule, lead singer and founder of Ruby Red Citrus Freaks has
emerged from the "treatment center" she checked
herself into 2 weeks ago. Still unknown at this date is
the exact nature of her problem and treatment.
Speculators have guessed that she sought help with a
curious affliction that has plagued her in the past,
namely, her compulsion towards performing facials on
unsuspecting strangers. To date, none of her
"victims" have pressed charges or spoken at
length with the media. We have heard through an anonymous
source that the end result of Saffron's assaults has been
smooth, firm,
revitalized skin.
- Chris Smalley, Bad Boy drummer in Bobby Pinkerton's
Big Band has announced his engagement to
Sheila Pembleton the "Tidy Bowl
Heiress." Ms. Pembleton achieved celebrity acclaim
for her many charitable works and contributions made
possible by the wealthy estate she inherited. Though she
is 50 years his senior, Chris says they expect a large
family. "My heart is aching to give its love to all
the children of the world," said Mr. Smalley.
- Goddess Mary SheRa's condition
has been upgraded to stable. She is recuperating at Cedars Sinai Medical
Center from hip replacement surgery. Ms. SheRa broke
her hip in a freak accident while defending her title as
"Beverly Hills Most Interesting
Pogo Stick Stylist."
- Tim Oliver, manager of the popular Seattle
band What's That Smell was booked
on charges of embezzlement in Las Vegas. His lawyer says
it is a misunderstanding and that his client was merely
doing some "creative" investing.
- The Reginas de Fiore received
this year's Flaming Torch award presented by Gays and
Lesbians United and Empowered. GLUE annually recognizes performing artists for
achievements in choreography and wardrobe. This is the
first year a drag trio has earned the award.
- "In Case You Are AR," The Demo Man
Said, "above for demo only."
C H A O S
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