Someday

I’ll Find

You

By

Kate Sweeney

Someday I’ll Find You

© 2012 by Kate Sweeney

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Purchase only authorized editions.

ISBN 13: 978-1-935216-37-7

First Printing: 2012

This Trade Paperback Is Published By

Intaglio Publications

Walker, LA USA

www.intagliopub.com

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

_______________________________________________

Credits

Executive Editor: Tara Young

Cover design by Tiger Graphics

Acknowledgments

To the usual suspects, you know who you are.

To Tara Young, my editor, who always hears the voices of my characters.

To Sheri Payton. Our morning chats over coffee are a godsend—thanks.

And finally, to my very good friend Sue. I know she’ll remember as we drove to Chicago to see Ellen DeGeneres quite a few years ago; she told me all her exploits while in the army and gave me the inspiration for this story. Thanks, Sue.

Chapter 1

The inside of her mouth felt like the Sahara. Cautiously, she opened one eye and painfully blinked as she looked around the room. Well, it’s my bedroom, that’s comforting, she thought. She saw several items of apparel strewn all over and winced.

Frantically, she tried to remember the previous night. She had stopped at the bar, not knowing why. Rae, Rae, why do you do this? she asked herself, trying to ease out from under the snoring, naked woman sprawled all over her. 

Rae gave up and looked at the ceiling. A name, she thought...Angie that was it; she quietly thanked the gods above. The young woman—and how young, Rae could not gauge now—let out a small snort and stirred.

“Hmm. Good morning,” the Angie-woman whispered and cuddled closer.

Rae looked down at her and gave a self-conscious wince. “Hello. How did you sleep?” she asked casually.

The young woman smiled and looked up. “Did we sleep?” She kissed Rae’s shoulder. She then moved over her and looked down into Rae’s eyes. “I’m glad you stopped in last night. I was prepared for a boring evening.” She sighed as she kissed Rae deeply, her tongue playfully dancing with Rae’s.

“You were fantastic,” she murmured against Rae’s lips. “I’ve never been with an older woman before.” 

She lowered herself and began kissing Rae’s neck and shoulders. “You never told me where you got this scar.”

“An old football injury.” Letting out a small groan, Rae tried to collect her wits. “Look, Angie.”

“Amy.”

Shit.

“Sorry, Amy.” A very deep, sensual kiss cut off her next words.

“I don’t care what you call me,” Amy murmured as she lightly nibbled her earlobe.

Rae became instantly aroused, and at the same time, she knew she should stop this, truly she did.

And she would, truly she would.

*******

“You will call me, won’t you?” Amy asked sometime later as she sat on the side of the bed and dressed.

Rae lay on her side watching her. Amy was a good kid, she thought, but a kid nonetheless. Well, everyone seemed like a kid to Rae. She was admiring Amy’s back, though marred by a hideous tattoo of a snake that ran from just above her backside, across her back, to the base of her neck.

“What possessed you to get a tattoo of a snake, a very large snake?” Rae asked, completely intrigued.

 Amy laughed as she pulled her sweater over her head. She wore no bra; she didn’t need one. In perfect shape, Rae thought sourly. Truthfully, for her age, so was Rae. However, she pulled the sheet up over her middle-aged breasts.

“I wanted it,” she said simply and shrugged. She then stood and pulled her tight jeans up. Rae noticed once again her young body and smiled.

Amy leaned over and kissed her. “I gotta go. I have to change a few plans. There’s something I was supposed to do, but now…” she said pensively and looked into Rae’s eyes. “I just can’t do it. Besides, I’ve got a class at noon.”

As she pulled away, Rae sported an incredulous look. “Please tell me you’re a teacher.”

Amy laughed openly. “Nope, sorry. English Lit major at Northwestern. I’m a graduate student working on my doctorate if that helps. Now are you gonna call me?” 

Rae didn’t answer at first. “Amy...”

“Don’t tell me you’re too old for me. Just call, okay?”

Rae relented against her better judgment. “Okay. I’ll call you later in the week.”

Amy smiled as she searched Rae’s face. In a moment, Rae started to feel uncomfortable; she nearly retreated under the intense scrutiny until Amy spoke.

 “You’ve got beautiful blue eyes, Rae. I’ve got a full week, so call me and we’ll do something on the weekend. Call me,” she threatened gently and ruffled Rae’s blond hair. She then bounded off the bed and out of the room.

Rae lay there staring at the door. When she heard the front door slam, she lay back staring at the ceiling and sighed. “The young bounce back so quickly after a hard night.” She put her hands behind her head, her mind wandering back to the night before.

She had worked later than usual. Some client wasn’t happy with the security system Rae installed, so she had to make the trip back into downtown Chicago. By the time she was done, she figured she’d stop at a gay bar she frequented. That was where she saw Amy. She was sitting with another somewhat older woman.

Rae smiled as she remembered how innocent Amy looked and how young. After a few cocktails, Rae found herself on the verge of going over to her, but instead, she tossed a few dollars on the bar and started to leave. With that, Amy was at her side.

“You can’t leave yet. I just got the courage to come over here.” Amy smiled up at Rae. “At least let me buy you a drink.”

Rae looked down into those soft brown eyes and smiled. “Sure, why not?” She knew then and there how the evening would end up.

With the introductions made and the obligatory small talk, they found themselves going to dinner at an Italian restaurant near Rae’s home.

“So what brings you to Chicago all the way from Michigan? Our magnificent lake?” Rae poured another glass of wine.

“God, no. I’m terrified of the water.” Amy reached across and took her hand. “Do you live nearby? How about an after-dinner drink?” She smiled seductively as she stroked the back of Rae’s hand.

And that was that.

Now Rae groaned as she pulled her tired body out of bed. “I’m getting too old for this.”

She sighed as she stepped into the shower. She looked at the scar on her shoulder and her forearm and remembered how Amy wanted to know where she got it. Rae let out an ugly laugh as the hot water beat on her face and head.

Twelve years in the navy, nine of which were with Naval Intelligence, that was where. She was a young, naïve college graduate and had roamed around for a couple of years when she decided to join the navy. At twenty-five with a degree in criminology under her belt, the navy saw their chance. After officer candidate school, she had a rank of ensign, and three years later, she rose to lieutenant commander. She felt a purpose in life and felt her career heading in the right direction. With her knack for intelligence, the navy promoted her to commander.

She loved it, and she was good at it—too good, unfortunately. Young Commander Rae Jefferson saw the world and didn’t like what she had seen. Her last assignment was enough.

Having the life scared out of you will do that, she thought as she angrily took the soap to her body. She roughly washed herself as if to wash away the memory of that fateful assignment in Syria four years earlier. However, she couldn’t stop the vivid memory of that poor young Navy SEAL lying in a pool of blood.

Friendly fire...Friendly fucking fire.

Is that an oxymoron?

Chapter 2

By the end of the week, Rae did call Amy. There was no answer, so she left a message, though not sure if she was relieved or not. Rae thought about her off and on all week. Several times, she had her hand on the phone, ready to call her. Why didn’t she?

“Too damn young, that’s why.” Rae was in her forties. Amy had to be no more than half her age. “God, I could be her mother.”

As she dressed, she looked at herself in the mirror. Unremarkable, she thought with a shrug. Actually, many had told Rae Jefferson she was attractive. She was on the tall side, about 5’9”, with short blond hair. However, everyone noticed her eyes first. They were cool blue and sparkling, and her smile only accentuated them more. She was still in good shape, though middle age and gravity were taking their toll day by day.

“Whatever,” she said with a sigh of resignation and put the brush through her hair. She picked up her keys and bounded out the door, once again late for an appointment.

As she drove through the rush hour Chicago traffic on Lake Shore Drive, she thought again about Amy—Amy who? She didn’t even know her last name. Why did she allow herself to do this? It had been a while since she’d done anything like this. Hell, she thought, it’d been a while since she allowed herself to do anything, with anybody.

Since Carla, Rae hadn’t allowed anyone near her. Oh, she had her share of sexually charged interludes, but none of them stayed long enough to get close.

She met Carla right after she left the navy. It started too fast, but Rae needed a complete change. She needed to feel human again, and Carla was there, able and very willing. They had their troubles as any couple did, though finding her in bed with their good friend was the straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back. Rae let out a rude laugh as she remembered how she came home early one afternoon to surprise Carla.

Guess who was surprised?

*******

Rae crept into the house and quietly closed the door. She stifled a yelp as the thorns from the roses she carried pricked her fingers.

“Damn it,” she whispered with a low chuckle as she sucked on the wounded finger.

That was when she heard the giggling upstairs. She cocked her head and started up the staircase. The laughter became louder as she reached their bedroom. She put her ear to the door and listened.

“God, don’t stop…”

She heard Carla’s voice, and Rae stepped back in disbelief.

“I bet Rae doesn’t do this for you.”

Her disbelief vanished—astonishment took over. That voice belonged to Linda, her best friend. They had been in the navy together and worked side by side for six years. Rae could hear her heart pounding in her ears as she reached for the doorknob and quietly opened the door.

Neither of them noticed Rae standing there watching, as if she were in some sort of weird surreal dream. Both were naked, with Carla writhing on the bed calling out Linda’s name; Linda had her head buried between Carla’s legs.

For an idiotic second, Rae thought to herself, what’s she talking about? I do that for her.

“Excuse me,” Rae called out; neither woman heard her. “Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me!” Rae took her fist and banged repeatedly on the door.

Both women shot up in bed. Breathing heavily, Carla frantically pulled for the blankets, which were on the floor.

“I hate to break this up,” Rae continued in a dark voice, then took a deep breath and looked at Linda. “Get out of my house now.”

Carla took a pillow and put it in front of herself while Linda stood and put up her hands. “Rae,” she started as she gathered her clothes. She headed for the bathroom.

“No, you don’t. Get the fuck out of my house. I won’t tell you again, Linda.” Her voice was shaking with anger.

“Linda. Go, please, sweetie,” Carla pleaded.

Rae locked gazes with her friend. “Yes, sweetie, please go.” She noticed the defiant look on Linda’s face as she struggled into her jeans and shirt.

Without a word, Linda quickly walked past Rae, who stared at Carla with a pillow covering her. Carla looked down and said nothing.

Rae looked at the roses still in her hand and let out an ugly laugh. “Happy anniversary...darling,” she added sarcastically and flung the roses on the bed, nearly hitting Carla in the face, and walked out.

*******

Rae remembered how, after a few months of arguing and reconciliations, they called it quits. Rae couldn’t lose that vivid image of them writhing on the bed—the bed she and Carla bought when Carla moved in with her.

Rae hadn’t spoken to either of them since. She’d seen them from time to time but couldn’t bring herself to say anything to them. What would she say? Polite conversation, or bullshit as Rae liked to call it, was never one of her strong points.

As she pulled up to the gate of her client’s building and waited, she knew she slowly but surely, brick by brick, put up the wall she had when she was in the navy. She was a loner then, letting no one in for any length of time. It was part of her job as it was with nearly all the military personnel. As with them, she needed to be unattached while she was in Naval Intelligence—no ties. No one to worry about, no one could be involved with her work. How could she ask anyone to be a part of something she could not explain?

“Miss Jefferson?”

Rae blinked, shaken from her reverie.

“Did you want in?” the security guard asked.

“Oh, yeah, Jim. Thanks.”

The gate opened, and Rae drove through. ComTele Industries was one of Rae’s newest clients. They had skyrocketed in the last year, but their security sucked, as Rae so eloquently stated in their first meeting.

For the past two months, she came up with several systems, all of which the board of directors liked but couldn’t make a decision on. Rae was patient and polite, two virtues that did not come easy to her; she wanted to strangle all four of them.

She understood it was a big decision on their part. However, they really needed something done as soon as possible. They were running a big risk of having so many employees and no security check on any of them. They had government contracts now, and their medical research was a big draw. The board of directors agreed, but after each meeting, they decided on nothing.

Today was no different, although they did come close. Rae sat there, her knee bouncing; she was dying for a smoke as she glanced around the huge desk. All four men looked over her proposals again and again. They assured her they would make a decision soon, which irritated Rae to no end.

After checking in with other clients, Rae needed to relieve the pent-up aggravation of the day. She stopped at the club, hoping Amy would be there.

She sat at the bar and every time the door opened, she looked. She got a nervous feeling in the pit of her stomach as the night wore on. Two hours later, she sat there, talking to the bartender. Now even Sally was nervous.

“Will you quit looking at the door?” Sally exclaimed helplessly.

“Why wouldn’t she return my messages? I’ve left enough of them,” Rae said almost to herself.

Sally wiped off the bar and put another drink in front of her. “I dunno. Maybe she figured all you wanted was sex.”

Rae winced and regarded the smirking bartender. She had known Sally since she left the navy. One night about a year earlier, they found themselves in an intimate embrace, and one thing led to another. Rae was apologetic, which left Sally deflated and embarrassed. Rae knew Sally was attracted to her, and she understood when Rae explained Carla. Gratefully, Sally let it go, and they’d been very good friends since.

For a moment, Rae thought perhaps Sally was right. Then she shook her head. “No, Sal. This girl wasn’t like that. Something’s wrong, I can feel it.”

Sally leaned over and whispered. “Maybe her parents got mad at her for staying out past curfew and took away her cell phone.”

“Very amusing.”

Sally gave a triumphant nod. “You do need a gal in your life,” she said happily and turned away. “How about someone your own age for a change?”

“Oh, beat it, you big buttinski,” Rae mumbled under her breath.

“I heard that,” Sally called as she walked away.

Rae looked around the bar and spotted a woman who looked familiar. She was shooting pool with another young woman. Then it dawned on her—these women were with Amy that night.

The younger of the two looked at Rae as she approached them. “I remember you. Is Amy with you?”

“No. I was just going to ask you if you’ve seen her. I’ve left a few messages, but she hasn’t returned them.” She saw them exchange worried glances.

The older, dark-haired woman stepped up to Rae. “Look, this isn’t funny. You left with her that night. We talked to her the next day, and she raved about you, said she was going to see you this weekend. She was looking forward to it.”

Rae scratched the back of her neck. The younger of the two stuck out her hand. “Look, I’m Jane, and this is Pam.”

Rae shook both hands and nodded. “Rae Jefferson. You haven’t heard from her all week?”

Both women nodded. Pam gave Rae a skeptical look. “I’ll be honest with you. I didn’t much care for the fact that she left with you that night. We’ve known Amy for a long while.”

“I don’t blame you. Where does she live?” Rae asked.

“You don’t know?”

Rae ignored Pam’s accusatory tone and remained silent. She understood that this woman was a friend and tried not to let her anger get in the way.

Jane reached over and put a hand on Pam’s arm. Pam seemed to soften. “Sorry.”

Rae waved her off. “Have you gone to her place?”

Jane shook her head. “She didn’t show up for class yesterday. We had dinner plans, and she never showed. This isn’t like her.”

Both of them looked worried and very nervous. Rae watched them for a moment, then took out her cell phone. “Give me a moment.” She dialed a number and waited as they watched.

“Delia? Rae. Look, I’ve got a favor. I might have a missing person... Amy,” she stopped and felt her face turn red-hot. 

Pam glared for a moment, but Jane said, “Davis, Amy Marie Davis. She’s twenty-six, 1513 Winthrop in Chicago.” 

Rae gave her an apologetic look and avoided Pam altogether. She repeated the information to Delia. “Can you help?”

“I’ll take a look and see what’s come over. How long has she been missing?” Delia asked. Rae could hear her typing on a keyboard, telling Delia it might be a few days. “I’ll get back to you.”

Rae snapped the phone shut. “Delia Grainger is a cop and a friend of mine. She’ll check out what she can. I don’t mean to be an alarmist. Perhaps she went away with some friends.”

“No. She’d never leave without saying something to us,” Jane said.

Rae watched Jane. She was an attractive woman, on the short side, with long brown hair and hazel eyes. Pam was taller and had the air of an athlete about her. With short jet-black hair and dark eyes, she looked to be of Hispanic descent. She still watched Rae and said nothing; the stare irritated Rae.

“Pam, honey, quit glaring,” Jane admonished gently as if to read Rae’s mind.

Rae reluctantly let out a short chuckle. “I don’t blame you, Pam. Look, I’m not going to explain or excuse what happened with Amy. However, if what you say is true, I think we’d better try to find out where she is. Let’s try one more time.” Rae pulled out her cell phone and dialed Amy’s number. Again, she got her answering service and left a message. For some reason, the hair on the back of her neck bristled. She instinctively rubbed her neck and frowned. This was an old feeling she used to get long ago.

It usually happened while she was involved in Naval Intelligence. It usually meant something was about to go very wrong, very quickly.

Chapter 3

After a short discussion, they decided to go to Amy’s apartment and drove there in Rae’s jeep.

Pam looked around the military vehicle. “I didn’t know they made these anymore,” she said as she climbed in the backseat.

Rae glanced in the rearview mirror as she pulled away from the curb. “I got it from a marine friend of mine. I was in the navy for twelve years. They gave him a great deal,” she said with a trace of sarcasm.

“Really, what did you do in the navy?” Jane asked.

“Nothing spectacular,” Rae said; she knew her dismissive tone would end the topic.

They drove the remaining two blocks in silence as they pulled into the driveway of a brownstone two-flat.

“She’s on the top floor,” Jane said as she opened the door. “We exchanged keys a while back.”

Old instincts took over for Rae, who walked in first. She looked around the foyer and up the stairs.

Pam and Jane watched her carefully. “GI Jane,” Pam whispered, and Jane elbowed her ribs.

Rae heard the exchange and smiled inwardly. They have no idea, she thought. She walked upstairs with Jane and Pam following. Once at the top, Rae stood back to allow Jane to open the door. For some reason, she handed the key to Rae, who raised an eyebrow and reluctantly took the key. She found the door already opened.

“Why does this not surprise me?” Rae said absently.

Jane and Pam seemed shocked. Rae noticed Pam stepped back and pulled Jane away from the door in a protective move. Rae then pushed the door open and looked into the darkness.

“The light switch is there on the left,” Jane whispered.

Pam interrupted her. “No. It’s on the right, remember?”

Rae looked to the heavens for help, then turned to them and put her finger to her lips. Though only the filtered light from the streetlight dimly illuminated the living room, she noticed the furniture tossed all over the room. There were papers strewn everywhere. Behind her, she heard Jane gasp. Then Pam flicked on the light, and Rae whirled around to stop her. Before she had a chance to turn the light off, someone bolted from around the corner, knocking Rae off-balance and headlong into the overturned chair.

She heard Jane scream as she regained her balance. Jane, white as a ghost, and Pam were already running down the stairs.

“Sonofabitch,” Rae cursed. She caught Jane by the arm, digging her phone out of her pocket. “Call the police. Stay put,” she called and ran after Pam.

Jane stood there for an instant looking at the phone. “Oh, no, you don’t,” she cried out and dashed down the stairs as she dialed.

Rae saw Pam running across the street and followed. When she got there, Pam was completely out of breath and bent over.

Whoever it was got away. Rae ran up to her and looked in both directions. “Shit! How could he get away so fast?”

Pam looked up. “You could at least have the decency to look out of breath,” she said with a wheeze.

Jane ran toward them; she too was out of breath and wheezing. “They’re on their way.” 

Rae nodded as she looked around. “Okay, let’s get back. Did you see him at all?” she asked Pam, who stood and held her side.

“Not really—big, though, and fast.” She gave Rae a sheepish look. “It was probably a bad idea to turn the light on?”

“Natural instinct, don’t worry about it,” Rae said, still looking around.

Jane gave her a curious look. “But not natural to you. What did you do in the navy?”

“Let’s go, children. The police will be here in a minute,” she said, and as if on cue, the sirens screamed in the distance.

*******

Rae looked around the apartment as she answered the policeman’s questions.

“Lieutenant McGrath? All set,” the officer called out.

 Rae now regarded the lieutenant warily.

“Okay. Here’s what I’ve got so far,” he said. “You two have known Miss Davis for four years. And you, Miss Jefferson, knew her for what—eight hours?” he said with a smug grin.

Rae smiled slightly. He looked like an old actor from the crime movies in the thirties—tall and lanky, all he was missing was an unlit cigar in his mouth and a soup stain on his tie. He was about sixty with a full head of gray hair. His blue, watery eyes now sparkled, and from his ruddy complexion, Rae knew he enjoyed a cocktail or two. He reminded her of Captain Scott in Washington, who was an old gasbag. However, Lieutenant McGrath had a kindly smile behind his sarcastic tone.

“Yes, Lieutenant. That’s correct,” Rae said as their gazes locked.

“She attends Northwestern with you, Miss Whiting. And she was a no-show at class Tuesday. None of you has seen her all week.”

“Yes,” Jane said obediently.

He then looked at Pam. “Miss Rodriguez, what do you do for a living?”

Pam cleared her throat. “I own a bookstore on Halsted.”

McGrath nodded and scribbled as she gave the address. He then looked back to Rae.

“I’m a security consultant, freelance. I only have my home address,” she said before he asked.

He smiled slightly and took the information. “Security, hmm, how’d ya get into that line of work?”

“Just lucky, I guess.” Rae shrugged.

McGrath sized her up and down. “Well, I’ll report Miss Davis as a missing person. We’ll dust for prints. If any of you have been in her apartment lately, I’m sure yours will be apparent. Looks like someone was looking for something.” He scratched the back of his head. “We’ll keep in touch.”

*******

The drive back to the bar was quiet and somber. As they sat at a small table, Jane broke the silence. “Where the hell is she?”

Pam reached over and covered her hand in her own. “Easy, sweetie.”

Rae watched them for a moment and wondered how long these women had known each other. By Jane’s age, it couldn’t have been too long. She looked as young as Amy did. “I’m going to ask a question, and if I’m out of line, I’m sure you’ll let me know,” Rae said. “There’s got to be a reason for Amy’s sudden change of character. Perhaps drugs or—”

Pam leaned forward and interrupted. “Just because you spent one drunken night fucking her.”

“Pam!” Jane said. “Stop it. We both know how Amy is.” She turned her attention to Rae. “No offense, Amy’s a bit on the adventurous side. But, no, I don’t think she was involved with drugs.”

Rae noticed a slight hesitation in her voice. “Could she be with someone else? Someone she may have met?”

Pam was doing a slow burn, and Rae understood. However, she was being just a bit too protective. She wanted to know why but was leery of opening Pandora’s box.

“Honestly, I don’t think so.” Jane sighed tiredly.

Rae realized both of them looked like hell. “Okay. How about we regroup tomorrow? If anything at all comes to mind, call me.” She handed Jane her card, fearing Pam would just tear it up.

“Why do you want to help?” Jane looked at the card.

“You have guilty feelings perhaps?” Pam tossed in.

Rae again ignored her and directed her next comment to Jane. “Although I’ve only known Amy for an evening, I like her. I wouldn’t feel right abandoning this now.” Rae leaned on the table and looked at Pam. “I understand your anger, but if you don’t get that chip off your shoulder in a big hurry, you and I will have issues.”

Pam’s eyes widened for an instant as she swallowed and said nothing.

“Good night, call me in the morning,” Rae said and walked out.

They both sat there staring at her retreating figure as she gracefully and confidently walked out the door.

“Better be careful, honey. She may be a lot older, but I think she can take you,” Jane said with a smug grin.

“Me and you,” Pam agreed wholeheartedly as she stared at the door.

“C’mon, let’s go.”                                           

Chapter 4

He looked at her in wild amazement, then looked down at himself. Blood streamed from his chest as he fell to his knees.

“Commander,” he whispered.

Rae tried to run to him, but her feet wouldn’t move. She cried out as she lifted her gun to fire again at the retreating figure. The bullets came out in slow motion and fell at her feet. She screamed for help, but no words came out. Above, the helicopter swept the sand until she could see nothing at all. The only sound was the young Navy SEAL calling out her name.

Rae sat upright in bed as if shot out of a cannon; sweat poured down her face and back. She sat naked on the edge of the bed and buried her head in shaky hands.

“Damn it,” she cursed angrily. The scar immediately ached. She glanced at her forearm and traced the long thin scar with her fingers. “It should’ve been me.” She shook violently and lay back, covering her naked body with the blanket.

The dream haunted her that night as it had for four long years. Carla would try to console her, but she couldn’t. She had a hard time with any signs of weakness in Rae. She needed Rae to be the rock. Rae knew this, and for that reason, she never really told her what happened on that last assignment. She never really told anyone. How could she? Who really wanted to hear someone else’s crap?

She reached over and hugged a pillow, curling up in the fetal position, damning the tears that stung her eyes. She lay there alone in the darkness, holding on to the pillow as if it were a lifeline. She ached for someone to hold on to. To find someone, someday to…

“Someday, my ass,” she whispered as she fell back into an uneasy but dreamless sleep.

*******

She sat at her kitchen table the next morning, drinking coffee and staring at the cup, thinking of buying a pack of cigarettes. She quit three years earlier, probably just to prove to herself she was in control of something. The idea of starting again haunted her just like the previous night’s dream.

Avoiding the hauntings, she tried to concentrate on Amy. Where could this kid be? Maybe she just went on a binge, though she didn’t strike Rae as the binging type.

With that, the phone rang. It was Jane. “I just wanted to say thanks for whatever you’re doing. I apologize for Pam.”

“Don’t. I understand. Have you thought of anything?” Rae drank her coffee and flexed her shoulder. The old injury ached like the devil. She looked outside. It was damp and overcast—perfect fall weather in Chicago.

“Well, I thought I’d go and ask Professor Connelly if Amy’s contacted her. She’s Amy’s professor, helping her with her doctorate, I believe. But I’ve got classes till noon, and Professor Connelly is gone by then.”

“I can go see her. I’ve got nothing to do till this afternoon,” Rae said. Jane told her where to find the professor at Northwestern.

“I know where, I attended Northwestern. You were in diapers at the time, I believe. If you were even born.” Rae grinned as Jane laughed on the other end.

*******

It was still overcast and gloomy as Rae drove her jeep toward Evanston. The fall colors were just starting to show. Autumn on the Chicago lakefront was magnificent, especially on the far north shore. She pulled into the parking lot near University Hall, bringing back old memories.

Professor Connelly was probably old and dowdy, Rae thought as she climbed the steps of the old brick building. The teachers’ lounge door was slightly ajar as she poked her head in. At the end of the table sat an elderly woman, eyes closed and glasses precariously perched on the end of her nose. Rae snorted. This figures. Oh, well.

As she entered the large room, another woman quietly walked over to the old, dozing professor. Rae stopped and waited.

“Betty,” the woman said and gently shook her. Betty grunted as the woman shook harder. “Betty!” she called again, then lightly banged on the table.

Rae fought the irrational urge to giggle as she ran her hand over her mouth and continued to watch, unnoticed.

“For the love of Mike,” the woman said with a chuckle, then slammed her book closed.

Betty opened her eyes and blinked. “Did you say something, Sarah?” She stretched. “My, I had a little catnap. Was I snoring?”

“Like a wild boar, dear. Now you’ve a class in ten minutes. Would you like me to take it?” the other woman asked.

Rae noticed how gentle she was with the elderly professor. She also noticed this woman’s appearance. She was average everything, but as Rae looked further, she noticed the woman had a wonderfully full, soft curve to her figure. She found herself staring at her hips. This woman was not the usual stick figure to whom Rae was normally attracted. She looked like she may have been an athlete in her younger years. Rae smiled unwittingly—middle age hits us all. Though she thought it hit this woman particularly well. She looked like someone who may have experienced life and was comfortable with herself and her body. It was just an air about her. However, her voice intrigued Rae. It had a soft, gentle lilt to it.

“Nonsense, I’m perfectly capable. Just give me a hand, Sarah.”

Then they looked up and saw Rae standing there. Betty adjusted her glasses.

Sarah gave Rae a curious look. “May I help you?” she asked with a kind smile.

Rae just stared into her smiling gray eyes for a moment.

“Young woman, who are you?” Betty tapped her cane on the table.

Rae blinked and cleared her throat. “I’m sorry.” She walked up to Betty and held out her hand.

“Professor Connelly, I need to speak with you about a student. I’m Rae Jefferson.”

Betty took her hand. “Nice to meet you, Miss Jefferson, but I’m Professor Whitfield, this is Professor Connelly.” She motioned to Sarah.

Rae raised an eyebrow. They looked at each other again for a moment.

“I don’t suppose you still want to speak with me?” Betty asked with a slight smirk.

Once again, Rae blinked, totally flustered. “I-I’m sorry. I don’t know why I assumed,” she started, stumbling over everything she said.

Sarah Connelly gave her a curious look. A smile graced her pretty face.

“Well, I’ve got a class. It was nice not speaking with you, Miss Jefferson,” Betty said with a smug grin and winked at Sarah. “She’s all yours, dear.” She then slowly walked out of the lounge with a quiet groan.

Rae watched her retreat, then looked back at the professor.

“How may I help you, Miss Jefferson?” Sarah offered her a seat.

As she sat across from her, Rae explained the situation. Sarah listened and watched Rae as she talked. “So I was wondering how well you knew her and if you’ve talked to her in the last few days.”

“I only know her through school. She’s studying literature, and I’m the head of the department. She’s a good student and a nice young woman. How is it that you know her?”

Rae knew she turned five shades of red. She could feel it creeping up her neck. “Well, I met her, and I, well, we had dinner and...” She stopped and rubbed her forehead.

Sarah raised an eyebrow. “I see.”

Rae heard the tone, to which Rae took exception, but couldn’t argue. She knew that whatever this professor was thinking, it was probably true: The old lecherous ex- Commander Jefferson picked up a young woman in a gay bar and had a night of raucous sex. Typical story told a million times.

“And you haven’t seen her all week? She did miss a class Wednesday. She was also supposed to tutor a student this morning. She failed to show up. What do you think is happening?”

Rae shook her head, grateful she didn’t want to pursue her intimate knowledge of Amy Davis. “I don’t know.” She then told her about the break-in at Amy’s apartment.

Sarah frowned deeply. “Good grief. Have the police found anything?”

“No. I even called a friend of mine downtown. She’s a cop. I don’t know.” Rae ran her fingers through her hair, which she knew was a mess by the way her fingers tangled through it.

“Well, I don’t know what else I can tell you, although the last few weeks, I’ve seen her with a young man. I thought they might be dating. I know she’s gay, but you never know. Perhaps he can help.”

“Do you know where he might be?” Rae asked.

“Are you a police officer or private investigator?” Sarah asked cautiously. “I only ask because you have an air of authority about you as if you’re familiar with this.”

Rae looked into her eyes then. Rae felt drawn into those gray eyes and smiled slightly when Sarah blinked several times and cleared her throat.

“I’m sorry, it’s none of my business,” she said quickly and shuffled a few papers in front of her.

Rae shrugged. “Don’t be sorry. No, I’m not the law by any stretch. I just feel compelled to help.”

Suddenly, Rae felt exhausted and worn. She stretched the back of her neck and noticed Sarah watching her with a slight grin.

“Insomnia?”

Rae, uncharacteristically embarrassed, nodded. “I guess.”

“I lived with an insomniac for ten years,” Sarah said. “Couldn’t sleep for more than two hours at a time. So neither did I.” She let out a genuine laugh. “Now I know someone else was lying awake with her. And I’m quite content and rested.”

Rae laughed along with her, amazed at how easy it was to do this, and at the same time dismissing the idea of how nice it felt. “Can you tell me about this young man?”

“I’ll do better. I’ll take you to him,” Sarah offered.

*******

As they walked through the campus in silence, Rae looked around her and smiled. Sarah stole a glance at her.

“Something you find amusing, Miss Jefferson?”

“No, no. I was just remembering when I went to school here.” Rae noticed her companion stopped. Rae looked back and chuckled. “What? Don’t I look like I went to college?”

“Not at all. I don’t know why I’m surprised. I apologize. What did you study?”

“Criminology, psychology. It fascinated me,” Rae said with a noncommittal shrug as they started walking.

“So you do have some background in this? What did you do with it?” she asked curiously.

“Nothing at first, then I joined the navy.”

Once again, Rae noticed she was walking alone. “Professor, at this rate, we’ll never get to our young man.”

“I’ve never met anyone who was in the military. Was it tough?” she asked pointedly.

She looked down at Sarah and chuckled openly. Inexplicably, she wanted to tell this woman all about it. That scared the hell out of her. “No, it wasn’t,” she said without looking at Sarah.

“Hmm.”

Rae heard the disbelief behind the grunt. They were silent as they walked up the steps.

“He’s down the hall. Room 213, English Poetry.”

Rae winced and Sarah smiled. “It’ll be painless. You won’t have to recite anything,” she said smugly. “Unless you feel the urge.”

Rae shot her a look and started to say something when the doors opened and students filed out of the rooms.

All at once, they were on opposite sides of the hall. Sarah pointed to the young man. “Mike Porter,” she called to him.

The tall young man with dark curly hair smiled at Sarah and waved. He walked over to her, and she introduced him to Rae. After shaking hands, Rae asked him about Amy. He listened and watched her for a moment. Rae thought for sure she saw tiny beads of perspiration break out on his brow. He quickly put a hand to his forehead and wiped.

“Have you seen her this week?” she asked.

Mike looked from her to the smiling professor. “N-no, I haven’t. Why?” He pulled at his backpack.

“No reason. She’s just missing, and I’m trying to find out what’s going on, that’s all,” Rae said and watched.

His gaze darted all over, then he shrugged. “Well, I haven’t seen her. Sorry.” He started to walk away.

“If you do or if you remember anything, please call me.” Rae offered her card, and he took it.

He looked from the card to Rae. “You’re a private investigator?”

“Why does everyone ask me that? No, I’m not.” 

He shrugged and walked away. Rae watched him as he walked down the steps.

“Well, Professor, thanks for the help. I’ll let you know what happens,” Rae said as she rubbed her neck.

“Why don’t you let the police solve this, if there is anything to solve?”

Rae tried to think of an answer, why she felt responsible. The truth was it lay in a small, unknown village outside of Tartus, Syria, on the Mediterranean Sea. Join the navy—see the world.

Rae felt a gentle touch on her arm but jumped as if scalded.

Sarah jumped, as well. “I’m sorry. You just seemed—”

“Sorry. I was…” Rae stumbled pathetically. She then took out her card and handed it to Sarah. “If you think of anything, please call me. Thanks for your help.”

She didn’t wait for an answer from Sarah. She just turned and walked down the steps and out of sight.

Sarah looked at the card. “Security Consultants Inc., hmm.” She sighed and tapped the card against her bottom lip. “There’s more to you, Miss Jefferson, than you would like anyone to know. This may be interesting.”

*******

Sarah walked back to University Hall and ran into Betty. “Well, Sarah, who was that sullen woman?”

Sarah smiled and poured two cups of coffee and put one in front of Betty. She explained, and Betty’s eyes widened in amazement.

“No! Amy Davis is missing, and this Jefferson woman is investigating. How mysterious,” she said as she put the steamy cup to her lips. “She was quite attractive.”

Sarah raised an eyebrow and ignored the remark as she drank her coffee.

“I said she’s...”

“I heard you, dear.”

“Well, don’t you agree? An attractive investigator—”

“She’s not an investigator.”

“—who is looking for a missing young woman? How does she know young Davis?” Betty asked.

Sarah raised both eyebrows up and down and rolled her eyes wickedly.

Betty giggled with delight. “Honestly? How interesting. She must have great stamina to keep up with Amy Davis all night. However, I think she’s too old for her. Miss Jefferson’s more in your ballpark, Sarah dear.”

Sarah gaped at her. “Betty Whitfield, you’re a wicked old woman. Stop that.” For some reason, Sarah felt bad for Rae Jefferson. She looked tired, and the tiny sleepless circles stole the sparkle from the captivating blue eyes. She glanced at Betty’s smiling face. “I said stop that.”

However, Sarah couldn’t get the image of Rae Jefferson out of her mind for the rest of the day.

*******

Rae met with Jane and Pam later that afternoon and explained Mike Porter to them.

“Know him?” she asked as the waitress brought their drinks. Pam and Jane exchanged glances. Rae waited patiently, toying with her glass. Pam picked up her drink and nearly drained its contents. Jane played with the straw.

“Okay. Ground rule time,” Rae said, causing both women to look up. “You know I want to help find Amy, correct?”

Jane nodded. Pam didn’t move. “Okay. Then you mustn’t lie to me. I can’t do a thing if you do. And one word of advice—if the police get more involved in this, you’d better come clean with them, as well, because right now, you both look as guilty as sin,” she said firmly. “Now how do you know Mike Porter?”

Jane sighed and looked at Pam, who shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “He and Amy dated a few times. Amy broke it off, and he got a little miffed. I think something else was going on, but Amy always clammed up on us.” Jane stopped as she noticed Pam’s scowling look of disapproval.

Rae noticed it, too. “She dated this joker, and now she’s missing? You don’t think that was something to tell Lieutenant McGrath?”

“It was in the spring, and he hasn’t been around since,” Pam said defensively. Jane stared down at her hands.

“Well, your Professor Connelly thought she saw them together last week. Shit, why didn’t you tell the police?” she asked almost angrily. “Damn it.”

“Hey, this is really none of your business, Jefferson. You know her for one night, and now you’re storm-trooping all over the place,” Pam said heatedly.

“You know you’re really pissing me off, Pam. She’s your good friend and you can’t put two and two together? Even if this Porter fellow is nothing, he was sure something last week,” Rae said through clenched teeth.

Jane put up her hands. “If you two don’t stop this pissing contest! Really, you’re worse than two men.”

An awkward silence fell around the table.

“There’s no need to be insulting,” Rae said seriously, though her lips twitched lightly.

With that, Jane started laughing, and Rae smiled reluctantly. And even Pam grudgingly smiled.

“Okay. Let’s call McGrath and at least give him his name.” Before she could make the call, her cell phone went off. It was Sarah Connelly.

“Miss Jefferson, I was just wondering if you were free for dinner tonight. I spoke with a few people today about Amy.”

Rae raised an eyebrow and agreed to meet her. As she closed the cell phone, she noticed Jane smiling slightly.

“Professor Connelly going out for dinner?”

Rae blushed against her will. “Is that bad?”

“Well, she never goes anywhere. She’s at the university all day and at the library at night. Hmm.” She sighed happily, and Pam laughed.

“You two need a hobby. Good night, children. I’ll call you later.”

Chapter 5

Rae sat at the bar and ordered a glass of wine as she waited for Sarah. She looked at her watch and noticed she was only ten minutes early. Why was her stomach fluttering? She instinctively reached into her pocket and took out the old Zippo cigarette lighter. Though she no longer smoked, she still loved the classic lighter. She toyed with it absently.

“I need food,” she said out loud and looked around. She knew this place. Matt’s Café. It was gay-owned and had just opened about six months earlier. So I did hear correctly, and Sarah does walk on my side of the street, Rae thought, chuckling. She glanced toward the door and saw her.

Sarah Connelly had just come in; she smiled and kissed the hostess on the cheek. Rae found herself smiling slightly as she watched her. The track lighting above the hostess table accentuated Sarah’s short curly auburn hair. From where Rae sat, she could see the streaks of silver shimmering through her dark hair as she absently brushed a curl or two off her forehead while she laughed. Rae’s jaw clenched convulsively as she tried to ignore the captivating figure before her.

Two or three women saw Sarah and waved her over to their table. Sarah waved and greeted them. Rae continued watching as Sarah said something, and the whole table let out a hearty laugh, which Sarah joined. She then looked at the bar and saw Rae. She smiled and waved, made her excuses to her friends, and walked to the bar.

“Good evening, Miss Jefferson,” she said lightly as she sat.

“Rae, please.” Rae felt awkward. She didn’t like it.

“Then you must call me Sarah.” She flashed a brilliant smile that made Rae blink in surprise.

What the hell is this? she thought as she picked up her wineglass and took a drink.

 Mercifully, the bartender walked up to them. “Sarah, how are you? Haven’t seen you in two weeks,” he scolded her and playfully slapped her hand.

This surprised Rae as Jane said Sarah spent all her time at the university or the library.

“I’m sorry, Matt. Time gets away from me. Hey, you’re the owner. What are you doing behind the bar? Never mind. I’ll have whatever Rae is having. Thanks, sweetie.” Then she turned to Rae. “So how was your afternoon? Any new leads?”

“New leads?” Rae repeated.

“Well, if you’re on this case.”

“Whoa, whoa. Sarah, there is no case, and if there were a case, I wouldn’t be ‘on it.’” Rae took a drink of wine, not knowing why she was getting so rankled.

“Okay,” Sarah said slowly, almost apologetically.

Matt set the glass of wine down, and Rae waited until he walked away. “I’m sorry,” Rae said and explained Mike Porter. Sarah listened wide-eyed but said nothing.  “So I told them to call the lieutenant and tell…” She stopped and looked beyond Sarah, who noticed her look and turned around. “Shit,” Rae mumbled and drank her wine.

Sarah seemed totally confused as she glanced back at Rae. “Who is that?” she whispered, leaning in closer to her.

“Lieutenant McGrath, what brings you uptown?” Rae motioned for the bartender.

McGrath smiled and stood between them. “I apologize for the intrusion.”

“How did you know I was here?” Rae asked, noticing Sarah as she looked back and forth, probably trying to keep out of whatever this was.

“We learned a good deal at the police academy. Just how you learned from Naval Intelligence, Commander Jefferson,” he added proudly.

Sarah raised an eyebrow but still said nothing.

“Okay, I was in the navy. Make your point, Lieutenant,” Rae said patiently. McGrath gave her a cautious look, then looked at Sarah.

Rae made the introductions. “Sarah Connelly, Lieutenant McGrath, one of Chicago’s finest.”

“Well, I thought I’d let you know that we have a set of prints that wasn’t from any of you women. We should have results in a few days. Nothing appeared to be missing, so her friends can go and clean up the apartment. We’re through.”

Rae toyed with her lighter once again. “You found nothing odd? Nothing?”

He gave her a wary grin. “What are you thinking, Commander?”

Rae shot him a look, then smiled. “Former commander. I’m retired, and I’m not thinking of anything really. How do you know nothing’s missing? Someone had to know what was in her apartment,” Rae said logically.

“Miss Whiting and Miss Rodriguez stopped over there earlier this evening. We went through the entire apartment. Nothing was missing, just tossed around.”

“As if someone was looking for something or making it look that way,” Rae said absently.

Sarah still sat there, watching. She looked over at McGrath, who was studying Rae.

“Now who would want to do that?” he asked.

“I have no idea, that’s your job. Now if you don’t mind, we were just about to have dinner.”

McGrath backed up and nodded. “Well, have a nice dinner. If there’s any news or if I need to question you, we’ll be in touch.” He nodded to Sarah, then walked away.

Finally, Sarah took a breath and noticed Rae watching McGrath as he walked out of the restaurant. “Well, that was interesting. My, Miss Jefferson, you sure know how to impress a woman.”

Rae flashed a grin. “It’s all uphill from here.”

Sarah laughed out loud and held up her wineglass and touched it with Rae’s glass.

They chatted over dinner. Rae saw the curious look and knew Sarah wanted to ask about her time in the navy. Rae knew she was not forthcoming in her short answers. She continually drank her wine, nearly leaving her dinner untouched. She noticed Sarah had no problem eating her pasta. At one point, she looked up to see Sarah smiling as she regarded her.

“You’re a conundrum, Commander.”

“Really? How so?” Rae picked up the lighter.

“One minute, you’re quite charming, and the next, you’re miles away. You fumbled—adorably, I might add—when asked about your life with the navy, only giving brief answers. You did not elaborate on anything and joked about most of it.” Sarah took a drink of wine before continuing. “You don’t like to talk about yourself, do you?”

“Do you?” Rae countered, trying to ignore the adorable comment.

“Yes, what would you like to know?” Sarah asked with a challenging grin as she ate her pasta. “I’m an open book.”

Rae narrowed her eyes at her and gave a rude snort. “No such thing.”

Sarah now watched her as she ate her meal. “Not everyone has something to hide.”

Rae shot her a look and started to say something, then stopped. “I’m not hiding, I just don’t... I mean, I…” she stammered helplessly, not being able to remember a time when she floundered so badly with another woman. She didn’t care for this at all. “So tell me who you talked to today,” she said professionally, trying to change the topic.

Sarah gave her a smug grin. “Okay. We’ll get back to your navy life another time.” Sarah continued to grin. “And I know that sounded like a threat.” She held up her hand before Rae could come back with a retort. “I saw a couple of students talking to Mike Porter. He seemed on edge to me, but maybe it was my imagination. Anyway, one student I recognized. Molly Eastman, Liberal Arts. The other fellow, I never saw before.”

“You said you talked with someone.”

Sarah’s smile widened, her gray eyes sparkling as she leaned in. “Yes,” she said eagerly, as if settling in with a good piece of gossip. “I passed Molly later in the day. I made sure I was in the Liberals Arts building. I made up some reason to be there,” she said, almost proud of her covert actions.

“Did you have to come up with a reason? Can’t you pretty much go where you want?” Rae asked.

Sarah gave her a deflated look. “Hey, who’s telling this story?”

“Sorry. Continue,” she said, smiling for a moment.

“Anyway, to make a long story short, I asked her if she knew Amy. I told her about the tutoring appointment she missed. She seemed to hesitate, stumbling over her words, and said she hadn’t heard from Amy or Mark.”

Rae leaned in. “Who’s Mark?”

“I have no idea,” Sarah said slowly.

“Did you ask her?” Rae patiently prodded.

Sarah gave her a sick look and sat back. “No,” she admitted. “She was in a hurry, and I would have felt stupid chasing her down the hall.”

Rae laughed, and Sarah looked up. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing, Professor.” Rae picked up the bottle of wine.

Sarah put her hand over her glass. “No, thanks, I’m done.”

Rae shrugged and poured another glass. All at once, she was staring at the glass, her mind far away. Sarah watched her as she almost angrily drank the wine. Then she shook herself from her reverie. “Well, maybe I’ll drop by tomorrow and run into this Molly Eastman on campus. I know it’s Sunday, but who knows,” she said tiredly.

“You don’t sleep well, do you, Rae?” Sarah asked frankly. Sarah noticed the cigarette lighter Rae played with. “Does the bald eagle have some significance?” Sarah touched the lighter.

“It’s from the 101st Airborne. It was given to me when I left.”

Sarah’s eyes widened. “I don’t know anything about the military. However, I love old war movies. You jumped out of a plane?”

Rae laughed; she realized this woman completely amused her. “Yes, Sarah, I jumped out of a plane. Nearly pile-driving my ankles up to my ass bone on the first attempt, but yes.”

Sarah laughed, nearly spitting up her coffee. Rae, though, was far off again, her mind wandering; she was helpless to stop it. She drank the contents of her wine and poured another glass.

“Someday you’ll have to tell me all about your military service,” Sarah said softly.

“Boring stuff,” Rae assured her, then hailed the waitress for the check.

After Rae paid the bill, they walked out of the restaurant in silence.

“Well, this was enjoyable, thank you,” Sarah said as they walked out into the crisp fall night. She pulled her coat around her and noticed Rae glancing around. “Next time, my treat.”

“I had a good time. Where’s your car?” Rae felt nervous suddenly, not knowing why. Now Sarah looked around. There was nothing out of the ordinary. Clark Street was busy, but that was the norm for a Saturday night.

“I walked. I live about two blocks, thataway,” she said lightly and pointed.

Rae chuckled and took Sarah by the elbow. “Okay, Magellan, I’ll walk you home.” 

“That’s not necessary, really,” she said. “But if you insist, who am I to argue?”

They walked side by side in silence. Rae felt Sarah glancing every now and then. “So what made you become a teacher?”

“I can’t sing,” Sarah said with a sad sigh.

Rae glanced at her and shook her head. “Are you ever serious?”

“I’ve been too serious for too long. Spent most of my life in my work and missed a great deal. This is my house,” she said and stopped.

Rae looked at the two-story brick house. It looked cozy and comfortable.

“It was my parents’. They passed away six years ago in a car accident.”

Rae winced. “I’m sorry.”

“Thank you. I miss them both. No siblings, so I really miss them.” They stood there for a second. “Would you like to come in for some coffee?”

Rae looked down at her, and for a moment, she almost said yes. Any other time, she would have suggested it herself, and in no time, they’d be in bed. Why did she hesitate with this woman? “It’s late, perhaps another night.”

“When? How about tomorrow night?” Sarah asked boldly.

“I…Well...Okay,” Rae said, caught totally off-guard, something that rarely happened. She began to feel like a teenager on her first date.

“Good, I’ve got your number.”

Rae narrowed her eyes for an instant.

“Your phone number, that is. I’ll call you tomorrow.” Sarah then reached up and kissed her on the cheek. “Good night, thanks again.”

“Good night, Sarah.” Rae watched her as she walked in. Sarah turned and waved, then locked the door.

Rae stood there for a moment, then scratched the back of her head and walked down the street. “Intelligence could have used her.”

She heard something behind her. As she turned, a black blur loomed over her. She raised her arm, trying to protect herself as the metal pipe found its mark.

Chapter 6

Sarah watched Rae walk away, then turned off the lights and headed upstairs. She almost wished Rae had come in for coffee. She found herself liking the way she fumbled, trying to talk about her life. Rae Jefferson was confident and self-assured when talking to that policeman but blushed horribly when asked about her life. Sarah also knew Rae had something going on; she could almost see it in her eyes—eyes that were incredibly blue. Sarah sighed, thinking how easily it would be to get lost in those eyes. But as beautiful as they were, Sarah thought there was a good deal of pain in them, as well.

“Or perhaps you’re being an old sentimental Irishwoman as usual.”

As she undressed, she heard someone ring her doorbell and grinned. “Maybe she changed her mind.”

Sarah threw on her robe and ran downstairs. She flipped on the porch light and looked out. “Good Lord!” she exclaimed as she opened the door.

There stood Rae, leaning against her door, holding her head. “Sorry,” she mumbled.

Sarah reached for her and pulled her inside, then slammed the door and locked it. “What happened?” She turned on the hall light. She gasped as she saw Rae, her hand bleeding, as she held the side of her head.

“Sorry, am I bleeding on your floor?” Rae asked.

“Come into the kitchen,” Sarah ordered and pushed her down the hall.

Rae nearly fell into the closest chair. Sarah grabbed a towel and pulled Rae’s hand away. “Christ,” she exclaimed softly as she wiped away the blood. Rae winced and pulled back. “Sit still,” Sarah said. “Hold this.”

Rae held the towel to her temple as Sarah left the kitchen to gather the arsenal of antiseptic from the bathroom. She heard Rae cursing as she returned.

“Fuck.” Rae stood, then sat right back down. “What’s that?” She motioned to the brown bottle Sarah held. She struggled to get the cell phone out of her pocket.

Sarah watched as Rae dialed.

“Delia? I need your help. Somebody clocked me a few minutes ago. Well, no, I haven’t a clue by whom. I wouldn’t be calling you if I knew…Yeah…” She looked at Sarah. “Can I have your address?”

Sarah recited it as Rae repeated it to Delia. “Great, thanks.” She sighed and sat back. “Delia is a friend of mine and a cop. She’s going to stop by in a few minutes. I’m sorry. I should have asked you first.”

“Don’t be silly. That’s fine.”

“I need to call Jane and Pam and make sure they’re all right.”

*******

After hearing both women were home and safe, Sarah opened the first-aid kit. Sarah cleaned up as much as she could. The gash was not too bad, just above Rae’s eyebrow. She then took the brown bottle, and Rae leaned back.

“What is that?” she asked again as the doorbell rang.

“This stuff will have you screaming like a little girl,” Sarah said as she walked out of the kitchen. “Do not throw it in the sink, either.”

“You have a definite way with women,” Rae called after her.

Sarah laughed as she opened the door. “You must be Rae’s friend.”

The woman smiled. She was not quite as tall as Rae and stocky with short brown curly hair and piercing green eyes. When she smiled, it took up her whole face. Sarah couldn’t help but smile back.

“Guilty. Detective Delia Grainger.”

“Sarah Connelly. The victim is in the kitchen.”

“Can’t be alone for a minute.”

Rae opened her eyes and smiled ruefully. Delia stood there, hands on her hips, sporting a wary grin.

“As you were, Ensign Grainger,” Rae said flatly.

“You know it’s detective now, Commander.” Delia shook her head.

Sarah sat next to Rae and continued with the first aid. “Tell her what happened,” she said as she dabbed the wound.

Rae winced but didn’t flinch. Sarah could see every muscle tense. However, she sat perfectly still. Her self-control amazed Sarah; it also made her a teeny bit nervous. Although, truthfully, Sarah would be crying like a baby right now.

“I was walking back to my car, and some jackass blindsided me. He hit me with something. I thought it might have been a metal pipe. I caught a glint of it from the streetlight. He took off, and I ran after him.”

“You what?” Sarah asked and sat back. “Are you nuts?” She shook her head and continued her first aid.

Delia raised an eyebrow. “Miss Connelly, I hardly know you, but I like you. I agree, are you nuts?”

Rae glared at both of them. “Great, bookends. No, I’m not, but he was too fast. I slipped, and well, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come here, but I was on the verge of passing out.”

“Of course you should have come here. Bleeding all over the place, chasing muggers. You are nuts,” Sarah said.

Rae laughed sadly. “You could be right,” she agreed in a defeated voice.

Sarah softened and cleaned up the table. “Well, I think you’ll live.”

“You’ve got a pretty nurse taking care of you. It’s about time. I’m surprised this two-headed commander never told me about you,” Delia said, smiling. “So how long have you two—”

“I met Professor Connelly today. I had just walked her home from dinner.” Rae scowled at her navy buddy, who turned bright red.

“Oh…”

Sarah chuckled. “It’s an honest mistake. Thanks for the compliment.” She looked at Rae, who blinked but said nothing.

Sarah was having the time of her life. Nothing ever happened to her. Now she had two former sailors in her kitchen—two attractive female sailors. She grinned happily—fleet’s in!

“Okay, Commander, I’ll have a patrol car cruise around for the next few days.” Delia scribbled in her notepad.

“Don’t call me commander,” Rae said tiredly and rubbed her forehead.

Sarah watched Delia as she smiled sadly and patted Rae on the shoulder. “Still beating yourself up?”

Rae shot her an angry look, then leaned back and sighed.

“I’d offer to drive you home, but I have to get back to the precinct.”

“I can walk back to my—”

“Sarah, would you keep this wayward commander overnight? May I call you Sarah?”

“Of course, you can, and of course, I will. She shouldn’t be walking around anyway.”

They looked down at Rae, who sighed and held up her hands. “I give.”

“She’s so easy,” Delia said. “I remember back in Pensacola, we—”

“Scram, will you?”

Delia laughed and kissed her forehead. “Call you tomorrow.” She looked over at Sarah and winked. “Take care of this woman. She won’t do it herself.”

“Goodbye, Detective Grainger,” Rae grumbled as Sarah led the laughing Delia out the door.

She found Rae staring at the table, deep in thought when she returned. She hesitated for a moment before clearing her throat. “Well, your shirt is ruined. Take it off and I’ll clean it for you.”

“Thank you, but I’m fine. I should be going.” Rae stood.

Sarah put her hand on her shoulder. “Rae Jefferson, you’re not going anywhere. You can take the spare room.” She laughed almost like a kid. “This is like an old movie.”

Rae laughed. “You are goofy.” She started unbuttoning her shirt.

Sarah gaped at her. “Wait. Let me get…” she said and turned around.

Rae let out a hearty chuckle. “Professor Connelly, you’re a prude.” She continued laughing and took off her shirt. She was wearing a snug-fitting tank top under it.

Sarah glared at her. “Very funny. Hand it over.”

Then she noticed the thin line of a scar on Rae’s shoulder and forearm. She was also trying not to stare at her breasts. Well, no, she really wasn’t. Rae Jefferson was in very fit shape. All at once, Sarah felt old and dowdy. She instinctively tightened her stomach muscles and winced as she felt her lower back cramp.

Rae handed her the bloodied shirt; Sarah graciously did not ask about the scars.

“Why don’t you take a hot shower? I’ll get you another shirt and a pair of sweats.”

*******

Rae stood under the shower and flexed her shoulder; she landed heavily on it when she fell. She was about to step out of the shower when she heard the door open and immediately froze.

“Rae, I’ve got a shirt here. Need any help?”

“No,” she said quickly.

Sarah laughed quietly and closed the door. Rae peeked out from behind the shower curtain, just to make sure the impish Sarah had truly left. She dried off and put on the sweatshirt, closing her eyes as she smelled the slightest hint of perfume.

“Oh, for godsakes, Jefferson. Get a grip.” She struggled into the sweats, opened the bathroom door, and cautiously walked into the hallway. She heard Sarah humming down the hall.

She was in the bedroom, changing the sheets. She looked up and smiled. “Well, that looks better on you than me.”

Rae cast a glance downward. The Notre Dame sweatshirt was too big on her, but she stupidly liked the feel of it. “I appreciate all you’ve done. I really should go home.” She put a hand through her hair.

“Okay, all set.” Sarah ignored her. “If you need anything, I’ll be upstairs. Get some sleep, if you can sleep. Good night, Rae.”

As she walked past her, Rae reached out and put a hand on her arm. Sarah smiled up at her.

“Thank you, Sarah,” Rae said softly. Then, quite unexpectedly, she bent down and lightly kissed Sarah’s cheek.

“That was nice,” Sarah whispered. “Have a good sleep.” Sarah turned and walked to the door. “I will be tossing and turning, thank you,” she said as she closed the door.

Rae smiled and slipped into bed. For almost an hour, she lay there staring at the ceiling. Her head ached and her mind raced, trying to piece some of the convoluted mess together. Where was Amy Davis? How was Mike Porter and possibly this Molly Eastman involved, or were they? Maybe Amy just took off.

She painfully rubbed her forehead and winced as she felt the bandage above her brow. Sarah Connelly came to mind now, which was much more enjoyable. She was unlike anyone with whom Rae was accustomed. For one thing, she was an adult. Rae winced at her own superficial behavior in recent years.

She was used to the love ’em and leave ’em atmosphere. Young women love to be with someone older and wiser; Rae was glad to accommodate. It was short, sexually satisfying, and simple. No explanations, no expectations.

Her heart raced as she thought of Sarah Connelly. She was smart, savvy, and sexy. When she smiled, she smiled from her soul. That intrigued and scared Rae shitless.

Tossing in bed, she fought a different kind of urge. No, she argued with herself. This woman is not for you. Don’t even give it another thought.

In the end, she finally fell into a fitful sleep, giving it just another thought.

Chapter 7

Sarah woke early Sunday, and after taking a shower, she crept downstairs, not wanting to wake her guest. She tiptoed into the kitchen and put on the coffee. Then she pulled the shades to let the abundance of sunlight into her kitchen. It was a cool, crisp, sunny autumn morning. As she opened the refrigerator, she noticed a note on the kitchen table.

She picked it up and let out a disappointed grunt.

Professor,

Saying thanks for the first aid and the spare bed seems quite inadequate. I truly appreciate your kindness. I will call you later in the day. I need to find this Molly Eastman. I also have to get in touch with McGrath and let him know of last night’s mess.

Again, you’re an angel of mercy. Something I am not accustomed to. Sorry, but I needed to go.

Rae

“Phooey,” Sarah said rudely and read the note again. “Just what are you accustomed to, Commander Rae Jefferson, formerly of Naval Intelligence?”

*******

Rae’s head throbbed as she drove back to her place. She reached into the glove compartment and pulled out a bottle of aspirin. Tossing a few in her mouth, she chewed and swallowed the bitter pills. This was something else she learned in the navy.

“No water. Just eat ’em. Don’t be a pussy…ma’am,” Sergeant Walchek had said as she lay there, bleeding. Then he gave her a wink. Rae truly loved that old man. He was a seasoned veteran of Iraq and Afghanistan. When he was in full marine dress, the ribbons and medals covered Master Gunnery Sergeant Michael J. Walchek’s chest. He was like the poster child for the marines, and Rae adored him.

Now she made her way to her bed, peeled off her borrowed clothes, and landed facedown and hugged her pillow. Exhausted, she tried to get the sleep that did not come the previous night as she tossed and turned. The dream invaded her sleep, as well as thoughts of Sarah Connelly. Several times during the night, she sat on the edge of the bed, tempted to go to Sarah’s room. There was an attraction there, no doubt. However, for some reason, she didn’t just want to climb into bed for sex with this woman. The idea of Sarah holding her was overwhelming. Instinctively, she knew Sarah Connelly would be a nurturing, caring woman.

“I’m a mess,” she mumbled as she faded off, trying to forget the smiling gray eyes of Sarah Connelly.

*******

Across town, Sarah sat at her kitchen table drinking coffee and reading Rae’s note for the tenth time. Then the doorbell rang.

“She’s back.” She nearly killed herself getting to the door. She came to a screeching halt a few feet away and took a deep breath, smoothing her hair. Not too pathetic, Connelly, she thought, chuckling to herself, but she didn’t care.

She opened the door smiling, and it faded just when she saw Detective Grainger standing there. “Oh. Hello.”

Delia raised an eyebrow and took off her sunglasses. “Good morning. Sorry, is Rae around?”

Sarah stepped back as Delia walked in. “No, she left early. I don’t know where she went. Coffee?” she asked, and Delia nodded emphatically as she followed her into the kitchen.

She watched Sarah at the stove and saw the note. “From Rae? Do you mind?”

“No, not at all,” Sarah said over her shoulder.

“Rae didn’t stay, huh?”

“Nope.”

“You sound disappointed.”

Sarah shrugged and retrieved the coffee cups from the cabinet.

“So you just met Rae yesterday? A lot’s happened in twenty-four hours,” she said as Sarah placed the steaming cup in front of her.

“Yes, Detective. Yes, it has,” Sarah said.

“Delia, please,” she corrected her as she took a drink.

They sat in silence for a moment. Sarah was playing with her cup.

Delia smiled. “Something you wanted to ask?”

Sarah tried to feign confusion. It didn’t work; she didn’t know why she tried. “How long have you known Rae?” Sarah asked nonchalantly.

“Oh, ten years. I enlisted two, three years after her. She was already a lieutenant commander. We did a hitch in Washington for the last six years of Rae’s service. That’s where they promoted her to commander. After Syria, she retired. I’m still in the Reserves.”

“What happened in Syria?” She leaned forward, and Delia sighed.

“Sorry, Rae would have my head nice and neat on a silver platter. No, I value my head, as empty as it may get.”

Sarah chuckled and nodded. “Understood. She’s not one to talk about herself, is she?”

Delia gave her a sad smile. “No, she’s not.”

“And you’re not gonna tell me, are you?”

Delia laughed. “No, I’m not. Well, I’d better be going. I’ll try her at home.” Delia stood, then noticed Rae’s blouse and slacks cleaned and pressed. “You’ll spoil her, you know?”

Sarah blushed and gave a deflated look. “Fat lot of good it would do,” she said rudely, and Delia laughed out loud.

“You keep plugging away. I told Rae someday she’d find someone. Maybe like you. Not these young…”

“Thank you.”

Delia turned red. “I mean young with nothing upstairs.” She tapped her temple. “Rae figures no questions from them, and that’s all right with her. She needs a real woman to give her a hard time. I think you may fit the bill. You’re confident and self-assured.”

“And that’s not good?”

“Quite the contrary. Rae’s at a disadvantage here. You’re not like the bubble-headed girls Rae usually surrounds herself with. This will be interesting to see how this plays out. As I said, you keep plugging away. I’m sure we’ll see each other again. Goodbye.”

“Thanks for the words of encouragement. Goodbye.”

Sarah closed the door and stood there thinking about Rae Jefferson. It’s not a hard time I want to give her, she thought as her heart and body began to ache.

Chapter 8

Sunday passed with nothing resolved. With Jane and Pam not at home, Rae stopped in and told McGrath about the night before. He listened and raised an eyebrow, glancing now and then at her bandaged brow.

“Not a mugging?” he asked.

Rae took a deep breath and shook her head. “I don’t think so. For one, he took nothing. My keys and wallet were still in my pockets. I think…” She stopped and rubbed her forehead.

McGrath gave her a skeptical look. “You think what?”

“I think it was meant to scare me,” Rae said in an even voice. She then told him about Mike Porter, Molly Eastman, and the other fellow Sarah told her about.

“This Professor Connelly. How well do you know her?”

“I don’t. I just met her yesterday.”

“Well, at least you know her name, that’s an improvement,” he said almost fatherly.

Rae winced and shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She ignored his remark.

“Ms. Whiting and Ms. Rodriguez told me about this Porter fellow. I’ll take a look at the university tomorrow. Maybe ask him a few questions. Now I can see something going on behind those baby blues, Commander. Stay out of this,” he said firmly.

Rae gave him a wary glance. “Not to worry. I have no intention of stepping on your toes.”

He chuckled. “Well, if ya do, tread lightly. I got bunions.”

Rae laughed and shook his hand. He held on to it for a moment. “Watch your back. I don’t want any dead bodies in my precinct.”

Rae wanted desperately to oblige.

*******

She spent the rest of the afternoon in her workout room. Working up a sweat, she tried to figure out what was going on. So far, the only common thread was Mike Porter.

She sat on the bench and adjusted the leg weights, then sat back and pumped off the reps until her thighs burned. A good workout always cleared her mind. She looked over at the other apparatus, trying to ignore it.

Finally, she had no choice. It was painful, but she needed to finish. She straddled the bench, sat, and reached up for the bar. Giving it a mighty tug, she pulled the bar down in front of her, then behind her head, grunting as her shoulder ached with each rep.

She remembered her physical therapist back at Bethesda. “At least three times a week, Commander Jefferson. You just gotta. You lost too much muscle, your bicep is just about gone,” he said seriously as she pumped the bar. “Better that than your arm,” he said, watching her.

“Shit,” she now cursed as she let the bar go. The weights went down in a furious clang as she flexed her shoulder. She looked at herself in the mirror. The long thin line from the top of her left shoulder cut through her bicep where it ended. Another scar started right below her elbow jutting across her forearm.

“Attractive,” she grumbled, but she was lucky. The scar, though noticeable, could have been much worse. And a few inches to the right, she’d be dead and wouldn’t care about a scar. A pang of guilt swept through her as she angrily grabbed for her towel. She was dripping with sweat as she put the towel around her neck, walking out of the room and slamming the door.

She stopped in the kitchen and took a beer out of the refrigerator. She laid the cold bottle against her aching forehead, then angrily tossed her head back and drank almost the entire contents.

Then it started—the vivid scene of that hot day in Syria. Chief Petty Officer Higgins screaming for help. Rae standing there, her gun drawn, blood streaming down her arm and Higgins covered in it. She rubbed her eyes, trying to erase the images. She drank the remainder of the beer and opened yet another.

She made her way to the shower and drank her beer while the hot, steamy water baked her skin.

“Wash away my inequities, cleanse me from my sins,” she recited aloud, remembering her childhood days at Mass. She lowered her head and let the water stream down her neck and back.

Then she started to weep. She leaned against the wall, then slid down along the cool tiles to the shower floor. Her knees drawn up, she hugged herself and continued to cry, fearing she may never stop. But of course, she did; she would never let herself cry for too long. She took a deep, quivering breath and stepped out of the shower. It was then she heard the doorbell.

“Who the hell can that be?” She threw on a robe, grabbed her beer, and headed down the hallway.

There stood Sarah Connelly smiling and holding out her clean shirt.

Her smile faded as she noticed Rae’s red eyes and the beer in her hand. “Special delivery.”

Rae frowned as she stepped back. “Did Delia tell you where I lived?” she asked angrily.

Sarah raised an eyebrow as Rae closed the door. “No, why? Is it a military secret?” she asked lightly as she looked around.

The living room was spacious and looked lived in. Overstuffed chairs situated themselves nicely on either side of a huge comfortable-looking couch. All faced a nice fireplace. Sarah shivered; it was getting chilly outside, but the fireplace looked as though it had never been used.

“Very funny,” Rae grumbled.

“What’s wrong?” She set the shirt on the back of the couch and faced Rae.

“Nothing. I just don’t like surprises. Is that all right?” she snapped and drank her beer.

“Perfectly. Me? I love surprises. Are you going to offer me one or throw me out?” Sarah asked, refusing to be rankled.

Rae ran her fingers through her wet hair. “Oh, sit down,” she grumbled and walked through the dining room.

“Thank you,” Sarah said and looked around. “Needs a woman’s touch,” she whispered to herself. “Or a woman who likes to clean.” Dust was everywhere. She followed Rae and noticed an open kitchen off the dining room with a small counter with two barstools. She hoisted herself up on one and drummed her fingers on the counter. She watched Rae as she got a beer. Rae turned around and saw her sitting there watching her.

“Let’s go in the living room.”

“Yes, Commander,” Sarah said gravely, then smiled.

Rae ignored her as she led the way back to the living room.

Sarah glanced down the hallway and saw two bedroom doors and the bathroom at the end of the hall. “Hmm, cozy. Small, but cozy.”  

“Well, it’s just me,” Rae said defensively over her shoulder. Sarah opened her mouth to say something, then looked to the heavens and thought better of it as she sat on the couch.

Rae stood there. “Give me a minute. I’ll change.” She turned and walked out of the living room without another word.

“Good grief, what a grump.” Sarah took a drink of her beer and walked to the bookcase. “Hmm. Oscar Wilde, Shelley?” she said in amazement. Then she looked around and noticed the pictures. “Georgia O’Keeffe?” her voice squeaked out as she looked down the hall. Okay, who stole Commander Rae Jefferson?

Rae came back into the living room a few minutes later. “See anything you like?”

Sarah jumped and whirled around. Rae was sporting a smug frown. She wore a pair of tan slacks and a black shirt with the sleeves rolled up, revealing muscled forearms. Sarah smiled inwardly; she cleans up nice.

“Everything actually. Do you honestly read Shelley?”

“On rare occasions, when I’m not bedding young women,” Rae said sarcastically.

Sarah gave her a curious look. “And do you bed young women often?”

“Yep, two, three a day,” she said and raised her beer.

Sarah stood there, looking at the books. “You must give me the vitamins you take. May I?” She pointed to a book.

“Sure, why not?” Rae watched her as she gently handled the book, smiling as she read.

“Love’s Philosophy?” she said softly, almost to herself. She closed the book, caressing the cover.

Rae cleared her throat and took a big drink. “Shelley was a brooding jackass,” she said rudely.

“Unlike certain retired naval commanders,” Sarah countered, smiling.

Rae said nothing and took another long pull from the beer bottle.

Sarah glanced at her out of the corner of her eye. “So are we going out for dinner or not?” Sarah stood by the fireplace. “And why don’t you have this going? It’s cold outside. I have a fireplace, and I have it going nonstop. Nothing nicer than a roaring fire...”

“If I start one, will you keep quiet?” Rae asked smugly.

“Probably not. I could never promise something like that.”

Rae hid her smile as she drank the remainder of her beer. “Another?”

“No, I’m fine.”

Rae walked away, and Sarah watched her retreating figure, noticing her flexing her shoulder as she walked out of sight. She came back with a beer and some firewood. Sarah smiled happily as she sat on the couch and watched Rae build a fire. When she was finished, the fire was roaring. She stood there staring at the flames.

“Bravo. I’m impressed,” Sarah said. “Now how about I make dinner? You don’t seem like you want to socialize with the human race right now.”

Rae started to say something, then looked down into those gray eyes and sighed. “Fine, it’s all yours.” She pointed to the kitchen. Sarah rubbed her hands together and headed for the kitchen. She turned and grabbed Rae by the arm.

“Oh, no, you don’t. I’m sure you had K.P. duty in the navy.”

Chapter 9

Sarah opened the fridge and gave a shocking look. “Good heavens, woman, do you eat?” Sarah pushed the beer bottles out of the way.

Rae was picking out a bottle of wine from the wine rack. “Sorry, I didn’t do any food shopping this year.”

Sarah laughed quietly and looked through her cabinets. “Well, let’s see. You have pasta, pasta... I say pasta for dinner.”

Rae shrugged and opened the wine, pouring two glasses. Sarah eyed her cautiously.

“Don’t say it. I know you think I drink too much. If I hadn’t quit, I’d smoke too much, and I chase young women.”

“Sounds like most of the men I know.” Sarah opened the can of tomatoes and poured them into the pan. She threw a towel over her shoulder and got to work.

Rae leaned against the counter and watched her. She was humming quietly, feeling very much at home. Rae was staring at her hips again.

Sarah Connelly was not your typical lesbian, whatever that was. She looked like she could be someone’s mother. She seemed comfortable with herself and the world, Rae thought and winced at her own mistrust of the world around her. Sarah was average height and was certainly shapely, for the shape she was in, Rae thought with a nod. All of the sudden, the color rose in her face as she realized she wasn’t listening.

Sarah was sporting a happy smile as she asked again, “Garlic?”

“Oh, I-I,” Rae stumbled pathetically.

Sarah raised her hand. “Never mind. How long has that bread been in...? Never mind,” she said again and took out the long loaf. She turned on the oven, then cut the bread and spread it with butter and wrapped it in foil and placed it in the oven.

“We eat in fifteen minutes,” she said happily. Rae handed her a glass of wine. “Thank you.”

Dinner was actually delightful. They talked of their childhoods, their lost loves, and college days. Rae was enthralled as she listened to the eloquent manner in which Sarah spoke. Her soft lilting voice lulled Rae completely. She thought at one point she actually sighed openly.

“So after I graduated from Boston College, I got my master’s and did my dissertation at Northwestern. I’ve been there ever since.” Sarah smiled across at Rae. “And that’s it in a nutshell.” She finished and raised her glass.

Rae smiled back and watched her. “Why didn’t you stay out East?”

Sarah thought for a moment. “I missed the Midwest. It’s my home, and I had no reason to stay out there. I love Chicago. I can’t imagine living anywhere else. Unless of course, I fall madly in love again. Then I suppose it wouldn’t matter where I lived,” she said with a chuckle. “However, I’d have to be madly in love.”

Rae continued to smile and said nothing.

“Have you ever been in love, Rae? I mean madly, head over heels in love?” She rested her chin on her hand. “Or do you ‘wander lonely as a cloud’ as Mr. Wordsworth says?”

Rae stopped smiling and thought of all the women she’d known. “I guess I’ve been wandering like your clouds. So, no, I have to be honest with you. I don’t think I’ve ever really fallen in love. Oh, I’ve stepped in it a few times up to my ass but never fallen.”

Sarah let out an amused chuckle and nodded.

Rae gave her a curious look. “What’s it like?”

Sarah raised her eyebrows in contemplation. She then sported a wistful look. “When it works? There’s no feeling like it in the world.” She stared at her glass.

Rae cocked her head and noticed the forlorn look on her face. “And when it doesn’t?”

Sarah blinked, and for a moment, a tear welled in her eye. She then smiled. “There’s no feeling like it in the world,” she whispered sadly. “But perhaps someday…”

“Someday what?”

Sarah looked into her eyes. “Sometimes, when I go to sleep, I think of a certain someone, and I tell her, someday I’ll find you.”

When she smiled, Rae noticed the tear almost slip from her eye. Sarah reached up to wipe it away.

“Maybe someday you will,” Rae said softly.

“Maybe.”

For a moment or two, they just sat, looking at each other. Sarah smiled, her gray eyes sparkling now. Rae just looked, not knowing what in the hell she was feeling. She then swallowed and took a deep breath, then drained the contents of her wineglass.

She stood and rolled up her sleeves and started to collect the dishes. Sarah, in a bold move, reached over and held her wrist. Her fingers lightly traced the scar on her forearm.

“Tell me,” she said softly as her fingers caressed the jagged scar.

Rae swallowed with difficulty. This is where she usually joked, then made a move, and the young women swooned and followed her right to the bedroom. Instinctively, she knew this would not happen with Sarah, or at least, she didn’t want that, not that way. Hell, she didn’t know what she wanted.

“Good grief, what are you thinking?” Sarah asked, smiling.

Rae shot her a look and pulled her arm away. “Nothing. I’ve got K.P., you sit.”

Sarah gazed into her eyes and smiled sadly. “Okay,” she said. “For now.” She drank her wine and looked at the bottle. It was nearly empty.

Rae noticed her glance. “I really don’t drink all that much. I, you…” She stopped and angrily walked into the living room.

Sarah sat there watching her stand by the fire. She walked up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder. “Rae, look at me.”

Rae turned around, and Sarah was shocked to see tears in her eyes. “Please, please, tell me,” she begged quietly.

Rae opened her mouth, then quickly shut it. “It’s nothing. I’m sorry. You’ve picked a real asshole to have dinner with.”

Sarah angrily pulled her around. “Don’t talk like that. Something happened to you. It must have been horribly painful if you can’t talk about it. I understand, truly. I’ll listen whenever you want to talk.”

All at once, Rae got angry. Angry with herself, with the navy. Angry with that young Navy SEAL lying in the sand, angry at everything. She grabbed Sarah by the shoulders and shook her.

“Don’t play with me. I don’t need you. I don’t want you, and I don’t need your psycho-bullshit.” She shook her so hard Sarah’s head snapped back. Rae was feeling the drink and the weight of the world. “I know what you want,” she said with a snarl, then roughly pulled Sarah into her arms and kissed her. Her tongue assaulted Sarah’s mouth, forcing her lips apart as she reached up to cup her breast.

Sarah struggled and pushed her away. “You big conceited ass. How dare you manhandle me like one of your…” Sarah stopped and put her hand through her hair. “You big juvenile. You deserve the young and inexperienced, so you can lie to them and to yourself. You ought to be ashamed of yourself. A grown woman acting like a....man. Oh, if I were a violent person, I’d...” She raised her hands and shoved Rae as hard as she could. Rae reeled backward over the ottoman and crashed to the floor and lay there in stunned silence.

Sarah breathed like a bull, pushing her hair off her forehead. She then started to cry, damning herself as she looked for her jacket.

Rae struggled to her feet, petrified that Sarah would leave, terrified that she’d stay.

Sarah found her jacket and stormed to the door. Rae ran to her just as she opened it. “Wait, Sarah.”

Sarah pulled her arm free and looked at her through teary eyes. “I’m sorry for you, Rae, truly I am.” She then turned and walked down the steps and out of sight.

Rae stood there and just watched. She then closed the door, walked into the kitchen, and opened a bottle of beer. “Smooth, Jefferson, just like you.”

Chapter 10

Delia dialed Rae again, no answer. Then she tried Sarah. After a brief explanation from Sarah, Delia drove to Rae’s house. She had a spare key and let herself in.

“Rae?”

She walked in and looked around the room. There was an empty bottle of beer on the coffee table, but there was no Rae. She walked into the dining room, and suddenly, someone grabbed her from behind. Instinctively, she knew it was Rae.

“Rae. Rae, it’s me, Delia.” She tried to cry out, but Rae had her in a stranglehold. Just as she thought she would lose consciousness, Rae released her.

“Delia, shit,” Rae mumbled and stumbled backward.

Delia smelled the alcohol on her breath and shook her head. Not in disgust, just to make sure everything was in working order and still attached.

“Goddamn it, Commander.... Fuck me,” she said and choked.

Rae flipped on a light; she was half-dressed. Her shirt was unbuttoned and her slacks opened.

Delia chuckled. “Am I interrupting something? God, you’re strong.”

“Fuck you,” Rae mumbled rudely and struggled with her buttons.

Delia rolled her eyes. “Why do you do this to yourself?” Delia tried to help her.

Rae slapped her hands away. “Ensign Grainger, I’m a commander in the United States Navy. I can dress myself,” she said as she swayed back and forth.

“C’mon, Rae, let’s get undressed,” Delia said.

Rae narrowed her eyes at her and smiled wickedly. “How come you and I never did it?” she asked as she swayed. “Are we aboard ship?”

Delia sighed and chuckled. “You’re not my type.”

“Good girl,” Rae mumbled and patted her on the forehead.

“C’mon, let’s go.” Delia grunted and led her down the hall to the bathroom. “In ya go.” She stripped off her shirt and slacks, leaving Rae in her bra and panties.

She looked down at herself. “That’s pretty quick. You learn that in the navy?” She saluted.

Delia laughed and turned on the shower and guided Rae under the cold water. She let out a yelp as the icy water revived her.

After a moment or two, she cried out, “Okay, okay. I confess.... Shit!”

*******

They sat at Rae’s dining room table. Rae drank her coffee as Delia watched. Rae was always funny when she drank. She used to be funny all the time. Then Syria happened, and Rae was no longer funny. She never really told her what happened on that last assignment, only that it went terribly wrong. A young Navy SEAL died, and it left Rae seriously wounded.

“Sorry,” Rae said sheepishly. “You should leave me be when I get like that.”

“You really pissed off Sarah.”

Rae groaned. “I was a complete fucking idiot. Did she tell you?”

Delia nodded and winced for her best friend.

Rae groaned again and buried her head in her hands. “She’ll never talk to me again, and I don’t blame her. She’s got class, Delia. She’s way out of my league.”

Delia watched her for a moment. Rae Jefferson had never spoken of another woman like this. “What do you care? She’s just like all the others, right?”

Rae shot her head up and pointed a finger at Delia. “Don’t talk about her like that. She’s worth a hundred...a thousand of them...and me.”

“You’re in love with her!” Delia exclaimed in amazement.

Rae gave her a horrified look. “Don’t be an asshole,” she said rudely. “Did you hear what I said? She’s got it all over me.”

“I heard you. You’ve never talked about anyone like that,” Delia said happily.

Rae narrowed her eyes at Delia and sat back. Her gaze darted back and forth in contemplation. “No, no, no. That can’t be,” she said firmly, then grabbed her head. “I have such a headache.”

“You need to square this with her,” Delia reached over and patted her arm, “even if she hates you.”

Rae interrupted with a sick groan, laying her head on the table.

“You’ve gotta square it. You’re better than this dark crap you’ve put yourself in,” Delia assured her. Rae smiled affectionately and put her hand over Delia’s.

“You’re a true friend,” she said as the tears stung her eyes. “I’m a mess.”

“Yes, you are, but you can get yourself out of it. You need your instincts back. Besides, we’re still missing a young woman.”

With all this going on, Rae had almost forgotten. Where the hell was Amy Davis? But right now, she had to see Sarah.

“You’re right.” Rae stood shakily and grabbed her coat.

Delia looked at her watch. “Uh, Rae. It’s almost one in the morning. You can’t…”

“Oh, yes, I can.”

“What are you going to tell her?”

“I have no idea, but begging comes to mind.” Rae flashed the old smile of long ago. “I just don’t want her to hate me. She can tell me to blow it out my ass, but I’ve got to explain and apologize.” She grabbed her keys, then put her hands on Delia’s shoulders. Looking down into her green eyes, she kissed her soundly. “Thank you.”

“Well, you’re welcome,” Delia called after her as Rae raced out the door. “I think.”

*******

Rae paced back and forth in front of Sarah’s house.

“Shit,” she said softly. Then she took a deep breath and marched up the front walk and rang the bell. She waited for a moment, then rang it repeatedly. The porch light went on, and she saw Sarah peering through the blinds. Rae waved like an idiot, and Sarah angrily snapped the blinds. She did not open the door.

“Sarah, I’m not leaving, and I’m not drunk. I just need to talk to you, please,” she pleaded, then looked around the neighborhood. “Sarah!” she called a bit louder. Off in the distance, a dog started barking. Rae winced and put her face close to the door.

“Sarah,” she whispered harshly, and the door opened. Rae backed up as the screen door flew open, banging her in the head. “Shit, the same spot.” She felt the small bandage over her eye.

“Get in before you wake the entire neighborhood,” Sarah said quietly as she stepped back, pulling her robe around her.

Rae walked in, and for a moment, they stood in the dark foyer. It was so quiet Rae could hear the clock ticking. “I-I,” Rae started and blinked as Sarah flipped on the hall light.

“Aye yi, yi,” Sarah said sarcastically and rolled her eyes.

Rae took a deep breath and cleared her throat. “I wanted to apologize for—”

“Okay, apology accepted, good night.” Sarah opened the door.

Rae sighed helplessly and rubbed her forehead. They stood there for a moment saying nothing. “You hit me with the door,” she said childishly, not knowing what else to say. “I-I think I’m bleeding again.”

Sarah closed her eyes and breathed heavily through her nose. “Come into the kitchen.”

As she walked away from her, Rae stood there for a moment. She then followed Sarah down the familiar hall.

“Sit down,” Sarah said with cool detachment, and Rae sat. Sarah came back with the same arsenal of first aid.

“Boy, this is getting…” Rae smiled and stopped abruptly as Sarah glared at her. She reached over and stripped the bandage off her brow. Rae grunted and closed her eyes. “I deserve this.”

“You deserve this and more,” Sarah said sternly. She put her hand under Rae’s chin and lifted. She cleaned the small gash, all the while avoiding eye contact.

Rae winced, then pulled away. “Okay, leave some skin,” she said through clenched teeth.

“Sit still, it’s dirty. You want to get an infection? Then what, gangrene would set in, and they’ll have to amputate below the neck. On you, it would be an improvement,” Sarah said angrily.

Rae said nothing. She sat there obediently as Sarah finished. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Good night,” she said firmly and gathered the first-aid kit.

Rae reached up and gently took her hands. Sarah struggled for an instant. She stood there looking at her hands. “I’m sorry, Sarah. I’m every kind of asshole. You’re a good woman and a wonderful human being. And I treated you terribly. If you never want to see me again, trust me, I’d understand. But I couldn’t let you go without apologizing.” She let her hands go.

Sarah slowly sat. “Go on,” she said absently as she closed the antiseptic bottle.

Rae smiled slightly, and for the first time, she really noticed how pretty Sarah Connelly was.

“I’m really not an asshole. I just got horribly sidetracked a few years ago. I don’t want to go into it now. Someday, I will tell you. I-I want to tell you. Tonight, though, when you knocked me over…” She stopped and chuckled quietly. Sarah blushed, and Rae grinned as she watched how it made her cheeks a rosy red. “I landed on my brains. You were right. All the way right, Sarah.” She stopped again and ran a hand through her hair.  “Anyway, I just wanted to apologize for tonight. You’re better than I deserve.” She stood, then put her hand under Sarah’s chin and lifted her face. “Thanks for not throwing me out. Maybe I can call you sometime?” she asked, almost petrified of the answer.

Sarah stood and looked into the blue eyes that just looked right through her. The vulnerable pose rooted her to the spot. “You need someone to watch over you with a frying pan, Rae Jefferson. I’m not at all sure I’m the one, but yes, you can call me. You really hurt me tonight. Don’t ever do that again.”

Rae only nodded, she could barely speak. “I am sorry. Good night. I’ll let myself out.”

As she turned to go, she turned back and cupped Sarah’s face in her hands. “Bless you, Sarah,” she whispered and lightly kissed her lips.

Sarah’s lips trembled as Rae’s lips touched hers in a warm brief kiss. Then just as quickly, Rae let her go and walked out of the kitchen. Sarah stood there blinking, her heart pounding in her ears.

“Wow” was all she could say. She promptly sat before she fell.

*******

All the way home, Rae could feel her heart beating in her chest. She knew she was lucky to get a second chance with Sarah, and she prayed she wouldn’t screw it up. And although she wanted nothing more than to think of Sarah, the issue with Amy Davis still loomed. Someone had to figure out what happened to Amy.

As she slipped into bed, Rae fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. However, she woke during the night several times. The dream haunted her throughout. She only slept two or three hours and felt drugged when she hauled herself out of bed. But the thought of Sarah holding her in her arms was overwhelming. No other woman ever affected her this way. She smiled, thinking how lucky she was that Sarah didn’t tell her to go piss up a rope.

She looked at her watch—only seven. “God, will I ever sleep through the night?” She threw on her robe. Everything ached as she dragged herself down the hall. She groaned loudly when she heard the doorbell ring. “Who in the hell could it be this early in the morning?”

She opened the door, and Sarah stood there, holding two grocery bags. Rae blinked and gaped at her like an idiot.

“Nice look. I figured you’d be up. Take these,” she ordered and shoved the bags into Rae’s arms.

“What? Why?” Rae asked, shaking her head.

Sarah walked past her and took off her coat. “What? They’re groceries because you have nothing in your house. Why? Because I’m quite possibly a moron.”

Rae juggled the bags as she reached out and took hold of her arm. “You’re not a moron.”

Sarah looked up and sighed. “Damn you and those blue eyes. Go take a shower, you look like hell. I’ll make breakfast.”

Rae showered and dressed quickly. She took a whiff and smelled coffee and bacon. She found Sarah in the kitchen, cracking eggs into the sizzling pan. She noticed Rae standing in the door.

“Over easy?”

Rae just nodded and smiled. She got two plates and set the dining room table.

“It’s apparent you don’t take care of yourself and you bring out my maternal instincts, you jackass. So eat, then go do whatever it is you do for a living. Can you come to the university sometime today? We can check out Molly Eastman,” Sarah said with excitement as she fixed both plates.

Rae poured the coffee and pushed Sarah into the chair. “Sit, please. I can stop by at noon. I’ve got a client to see this morning.”

“Good, I’ve got a class at twelve thirty, room 124. University Hall. Molly Eastman is across the hall.” She raised her eyebrow, and Rae nodded approvingly as she took a bite of toast.

“There’s some connection here. I can feel it,” Rae said, and for the first time, she felt alive and working once again toward something.

“You look excited.” Sarah took a bite of toast. “Someday, you will tell me what you did for Naval Intelligence, Commander.”

“I will, I promise.”

“Just to let you know, I have the patience of a saint. Dealing with you, I’m on the verge of canonization.”

Chapter 11

Rae drove through Chicago to ComTele Industries, smiling as she thought of Sarah and what a sweet thing she did that morning. Her smile turned to laughter when she remembered Sarah on her way out the door.

“Don’t get nervous. I didn’t bring a toothbrush,” she called as she walked out, leaving Rae standing there looking like a dope.

Her near giddiness continued as she drove up to the gate. “I’m not sure I deserve to be this happy.”

Jim glanced down and smiled. “Good morning, Miss Jefferson,” he called out and opened the gate.

“It is, Jim,” she said.

Before she drove through the checkpoint, she noticed another car leaving the facility. Rae glanced over as the red sedan passed, and she thought she recognized the driver. A young man, black curly hair. She turned in her seat and looked.

Jim watched her. “Somethin’ wrong?”

Rae shook her head, then pinched the bridge of her nose. “No, Jim. I just need sleep,” she said and drove through the gate. The driver looked very familiar, she thought as she pulled into the parking lot.

She took the elevator to the seventh floor, then walked into the familiar boardroom. There they sat, all four of them.

“Good morning, all.” Rae set her briefcase on the table, then poured herself a cup of coffee. She looked around the table as all four board members greeted her. After a few pleasantries, Rae sat and sipped her coffee.

“Well, what’s the verdict?” Rae asked.

“We’ve decided to go with your proposal. Now what do we need to do?” Mr. Billings asked. He was the oldest of the four. White-haired and a cigar sticking out of his breast pocket, he was on the portly side and looked like Santa Claus.

“First, I need the employee records. I’ll do a background check on all of them. And past employees, just in case. You have to give me everything. You’ve got important government contracts now, gentlemen. You cannot be too careful. I can’t stress that enough. Then I’ll call my contractors. They’ll start installing the equipment this week. Within two weeks, we should be up and running,” Rae said.

“That seems rather fast,” one board member said.

“Yes, but I’ve been gathering everything in the hopes you would come to a decision at some point. So my guys are in a holding pattern, just waiting for my okay. They’ve already looked over the blueprints and are eager to get this going.”

“Surely, you don’t need all the employees?” Mr. Billings asked.

“Yes, I need all of them. It’s extremely important,” she assured them.

Mr. Billings started to say something. Rae watched, trying to suppress her obvious surprise of this silly question.

“Of course, it is. That’s fine, we can get all of them for you,” one said and left the room.

“Absolutely. We’ve vacillated long enough on this. We need to get this going. I’ll have them for you now if you like,” the other said in agreement. “I’ve had Human Resources preparing for this.”

Finally, Rae thought, someone took some initiative. They were all on the same page, and for the first time in months, Rae breathed a sigh of relief. After waiting for an hour or so, she left with the employee records.

She then checked in with Jane and Pam. They heard nothing from Amy all weekend. McGrath called, but he had nothing new. So she continued on her way to the university.

*******

It was a beautiful October morning as Rae drove down Sheridan Road toward Northwestern. Lake Michigan was choppy and wild as the wind blew off the lake. She loved Chicago; even in the worst weather, nothing beat Lake Michigan. And she was thankful she had the smarts to put the top on the jeep that morning.

As she pulled into the parking lot, she noticed a car parked a few spots down. “Is that the same car I saw this morning?” She shook her head. “And now you’re talking to yourself, Jefferson.”

She locked her jeep and walked through the Evanston campus. The leaves rustled beneath her feet as she walked up to University Hall. She found room 124 and quietly stood looking in the windowed door.

Sarah Connelly sat on the desk, her feet crossed and swinging. She wore a gray pantsuit with a black silk blouse. Rae noticed then she wore glasses. Dark-rimmed, they framed her smiling face beautifully. She found herself leaning against the door and just staring. Sarah was reading from a book, and all eyes were on her. Though she could barely hear her, Rae knew her quiet lilting voice captivated her students.

“Are you lost?” A voice came from behind her. Rae whirled around and found the old teacher from the other day. She smiled down at the woman.

“No, I was just waiting for Professor Connelly,” Rae whispered, and Betty reached over and opened the door.

Rae’s eyes widened in terror as she tried to stop her. “No, no. I can wait.”

Betty smiled wickedly as Sarah glanced toward the door and turned five shades of red as she took off her glasses. “Professor Whitfield,” she said self-consciously and glanced at Rae, who didn’t know what to do.

“Professor Connelly, this woman would like to sit in on the remainder of your class to see if she’d like to take it next semester.”

She pushed Rae in, then closed the door. Rae swallowed as all eyes were on her. Sarah gave her a smug grin. “Well, Miss…”

“Jefferson.”

“Well, Miss Jefferson, there’s a seat in the back,” Sarah offered and put on her glasses once again. “Okay, where were we? Hmm, let’s skip to...Shelley.”

Rae’s head shot up just as she sat; she glared at Sarah. She then settled in, her tall frame just a bit too much for the desk.

*******

Sarah smiled inwardly as she talked to the class. She noticed a female student glancing at Rae, who smiled and nodded. Oh, brother, she thought.

“What’s your opinion of Shelley, Mr. Adams?” Sarah hugged the book and sat behind her desk. Rae watched her, becoming unexpectedly aroused. All sorts of scenarios were flashing through her mind.

The young man thought for a moment. “I don’t know. He was so…” He couldn’t find the right word.

“Brooding. I’ve heard him described as a brooding sap,” Sarah offered. Everyone concurred, and a few chuckled. “But he was very romantic in a brooding sort of way.”

“Maybe he just needed someone to find him and understand him,” Rae said from the back of the room. A few heads turned her way as she looked at Sarah, who took off her glasses and smiled slightly.

“Perhaps, Miss Jefferson, you might be right.”

With that, she looked at the clock and closed the book. “Okay, beat it. Chapters six and seven for next week.” Everyone groaned, and Sarah walked around behind her desk. “Oh, quit grousing, it’s just poetry. I’m not asking for your kidneys.”

Rae waited for everyone to leave, then walked up to Sarah’s desk and put an apple on the corner of it. Sarah laughed and shook her head.

“I’m going to kill Betty.”

“Me first,” Rae said, and as if on cue, Betty poked her head in.

“All clear?” she asked, laughing. Both glared at her. “Oh, where’s your spirit of adventure? Heavens, you two act older than I do. So is my protégé treating you well?”

Rae smiled down at Betty. “Better than I deserve.”

Sarah avoided her face and shuffled papers on her desk.

“She’s trying to be coy.” Betty winked at Rae, who laughed out loud.

Sarah hid her eyes and shook her head. “Was there something you needed, dear?”

“Heavens, I almost forgot. That Molly Eastman is out on the steps with Mike Porter and that other fellow. I don’t…” She started and Rae excused herself and flew out the door.

Sarah shoved the papers into her briefcase. She hurried to the door. She then ran back, picked up her apple, and kissed Betty on the cheek.

“This is so much fun,” she exclaimed and ran out the door.

“Impetuous children.” Betty sighed and followed the nutty professor out the door.

Rae stopped short of the heavy double doors that led to the steps outside. Sarah came to a screeching halt right behind her, breathing heavily. Rae turned her head slightly.

“You need to get into better shape,” she said to the gasping Sarah.

“If I wasn’t sure...I’d need it after my...stroke, I’d give you…a piece of my mind,” Sarah wheezed and watched.

Rae laughed and opened the door slightly and heard Mike Porter.

“I have no idea. This is getting too intense.”

“Calm down,” the other young man said.

Rae took inventory of this fellow. Reddish hair, scruffy beard. Earring—diamond stud, left ear. Mole on the left side of his neck. He smoked, which now had Rae dying for one. He was a nervous sort, constantly looking around.

“I agree with Mike,” Molly said as the wind whipped around the building, causing a whirlpool of leaves and papers. It was then that Rae saw it. As Molly’s hair blew off her neck, Rae got a glimpse of a tattoo. Under her jacket, she wore a flimsy, tight T-shirt. It was on the side of her neck, just above her collarbone.

“Hmm,” Rae grunted, and Sarah looked at her. It was a tattoo of the head of a snake.

The three of them quickly walked off the steps and headed for the parking lot. Rae turned to Sarah. “Okay, go home. I’ll call you later.” She patted her shoulder and started for the door.

Sarah pulled at her arm. “I’m going with you.”

Rae craned her neck to keep tabs on the trio. “Sarah, please. I have to go. Now I’ll call you,” she insisted and dashed out the door.

Sarah quickly followed her, trying to keep up. “Rae,” Sarah called quietly.

Rae stopped and turned around. “Do you know how stupid we look?” Rae grabbed her arm, half dragging her down the walk. “If I lose them because of your stubbornness...”

They continued to Rae’s jeep. The trio piled in the car Rae had noticed earlier. As they pulled away, she pushed Sarah toward the passenger side.

“This thing is yours?” she asked horrified as she climbed in with a groan.

Rae put the clutch in gear and took off. She said nothing as she drove through the campus, keeping an eye on the red sedan. “I know I’ve seen that car before, but where?” she asked out loud.

Sarah wasn’t listening, she was too busy finding the seat belt and looking around the drafty vehicle that lurched every time Rae changed gears.

“Where in the world did you get this? Why in the world did you get this?” she asked, honestly bewildered.

“Hey, this is an authentic World War II jeep. It was a going-away present. They don’t make these anymore. I had it assembled,” Rae said proudly as she watched the road.

Sarah gave her a wary grin. “Really? Assembled? As in instructions?” she asked as the jeep found a pothole. She thought for sure her knees hit her chin. “Shocks sold separately?” She instinctively put an arm across her breasts—one more pothole, and she’d knock herself out.

Rae chuckled as she shifted gears again. The red sedan drove south on Sheridan Road back toward Chicago. Then it took a side street and headed into Evanston.

“Hold on,” Rae said and made a quick turn.

“To what?” Sarah asked seriously and held on to the seat belt.

Rae weaved in and out of the streets, trying to keep up. Sarah was petrified and at the same time impressed.

The sedan then pulled into a driveway, and Rae drove by down the street, then circled back and parked a few houses down. She reached over, opened the glove compartment, and took out a pair of field glasses. Sarah noticed the bottles of aspirin. Driving in this contraption, she could see the necessity. However, she knew the aspirin were for another reason; this had her heart aching for Rae.

They sat there for fifteen minutes with no activity. Rae took the glasses away from her face, then wrote down the address. She took out her cell phone and put Delia on speakerphone. She gave her the address and license plate number. “Run them for me?” She peered once again through the glasses.

“Sure. Are you alone on the mission, Commander?”

Rae gave Sarah a smug grin. “I tried. Believe me. The good professor is with me.”

“Excellent, then you two made nice-nice?”

“Goodbye-bye. Call me later.” Rae snapped the phone shut.

They sat there for a few more moments in silence.

“Do you think they have anything to do with this?” Sarah asked. Rae shrugged as she opened her door. “Where are you going?”

“It’s getting dark. I’m just going to go look. Now if I’m not back in ten minutes, call the cavalry,” she said and winked.

Sarah held her arm. “Rae, don’t. Why not call Delia and have the police take a look?”

“The police have no cause to snoop. If Delia knew I was doing it, she’d stop me.” Rae cocked her head. “Worried about me?”

Sarah glared at her. “Yes, I don’t know how to drive this ridiculous vehicle.”

Rae chuckled, then unexpectedly, she leaned over and gave her a quick kiss. “For luck...”

Sarah pulled her back and kissed her deeply. Rae gasped in surprise. However, she returned her kiss, not wanting to pull away.

Sarah pulled back and smiled. “For lots of luck,” she countered softly.

Rae blushed like a schoolgirl, then quickly got out of the car.

Sarah watched her as she jogged across the street and down the driveway of another house. She was out of sight, and Sarah just watched, waiting for some sign of her. It seemed forever, and Sarah was just about to call Delia when she saw Rae jogging across the street and limping slightly.

“God, now what?” She leaned, and with a deep groan, she opened the door.

Rae jumped in and started the engine. Sarah noticed her ripped slacks at the knee. “What happened? Why are you limping?” she asked as Rae backed up and headed away from the house.

“My good slacks,” she complained. “I got caught on a fence. They’re still in there, sitting at the kitchen table. Nothing seems out of the ordinary. Do you mind going back to my place? I can change.” Rae stole a glance at Sarah’s worried face.

*******

“Make yourself at home, I’ll be right out. We’ll go out for dinner,” Rae suggested as she headed for the bathroom.

Sarah’s stomach fluttered when she remembered the kiss. She wondered if Rae felt the same thing.

“Probably not,” she muttered to herself as she heard the shower going. With sexual scenarios flashing through her mind, her stomach was now in knots. After a few minutes, she went to the refrigerator, took out a beer, and opened it. Taking a healthy swig, she took a deep breath. Get a hold of yourself, Connelly, she thought as she stood by the couch.

“Drinking alone is a bad idea, trust me.” Rae’s voice came from behind her. Sarah whirled around. Rae had a towel to her head and her robe slightly opened; Sarah caught a glimpse of her breast and took another drink.

“Well, how about dinner?”

Sarah set the beer down and walked over to her. “Let’s not.”

Rae took the towel off her head and stared at her. “N-no? Well, aren’t you hungry?” She took a protective step back. Sarah smiled and gently pushed her into the big chair by the fireplace. Rae looked up in disbelief.

“Sarah.” She let out a halfhearted protest. Sarah took the towel and walked behind her, gently rubbing the towel through her hair. Rae sighed and put her head back.

“My, you have a soft touch.” Rae let out a contented sigh.

Sarah smiled slightly. She leaned down and whispered in Rae’s ear, “And you have a hard head.”

Sarah saw the shiver as her whisper sent chills through Rae, hardening her nipples through the soft fabric of her robe, which Sarah was happy to see. She ran her fingers through Rae’s hair as Rae laid her head back once again and sighed openly.

“You have a definite way about you,” she murmured. She gasped as Sarah’s hands wandered down the front of her robe, massaging her shoulders.

“You really are tense, Rae, relax.” Sarah kissed her earlobe.

Rae’s breath was nonexistent as she shivered uncontrollably. This woman’s manner had a good deal of experience behind it. Her feather-like touch was quickly arousing Rae. She sighed as she felt Sarah’s warm fingers lightly dipping inside her robe.

Off in the distance, they heard bells ringing. Rae frowned and looked around, as did Sarah.

“I hear bells,” Sarah whispered sensually. “Could it be…?”

“Shit,” Rae cursed loudly. It was the doorbell. Sarah laughed quietly as Rae stood, struggling to tie her robe. “Un-fucking-believable.” 

Rae marched to the front door and yanked it open. It was McGrath.

“Oh. Good evening.” Rae stepped back.

McGrath walked into the room and noticed Sarah. He raised a curious eyebrow and nodded. “Professor...” 

Sarah nodded but said nothing. He turned to Rae, who stood there in her robe. “Gee, am I interrupting?”

Rae glared at him. “What can I do for you, Lieutenant?”

“Well, there’s no other way to say this. We found the body of Amy Davis this morning in the Chicago River. A couple guys were fishing.”

“In the Chicago River? For what?” Sarah asked with a grimace, but she walked around the couch to stand next to Rae.

Rae sighed heavily and rubbed her forehead. “How long?”

McGrath eyed her suspiciously. “We can’t be sure until the autopsy is done. Possibly two to three days.”

Rae’s mind was racing as she remembered the few crime scenes she’d seen in the navy. “Did they find anything on her body?” 

“Well, the only thing she had on her person was her wallet and a business card...Your business card, Miss Jefferson.”

Rae shot him a look but said nothing. She knew what he was implying. “I don’t remember. I must have given her one,” she said honestly. Frantically, she tried to remember that night. When did she give her a card? Sarah watched but said nothing. She inched her way closer to Rae.

“Do you know where Miss Whiting and Rodriguez are?”

“No, I spoke with Jane this morning, but that’s all.”

“Well, if you see them before I do, let them know,” he said and turned away. “Sorry to interrupt your evening. By the way? Don’t go anywhere,” he said candidly.

“There goes Mexico,” Sarah said sadly.

A wisp of a smile flashed across McGrath’s face. “I’ll be in touch,” he said and walked out.

Rae quietly closed the door and stood there for a moment. Sarah walked up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Rae,” she said softly.

Rae turned and stepped away, ignoring her consolation. Sarah gave her a curious look.

“I’ve got to find Jane and Pam,” she said and headed for the bedroom. “I’ll be right out. We’ll try the bar. They may be there.”

“Why did the lieutenant tell you not to go anywhere?” Sarah asked as Rae stopped, then walked back over to her.

“Sarah, let’s look at this scenario. They found a body in the Chicago River. The only thing found on this poor girl was my business card. I was probably the last one to see her, after spending the night with her. If it’s determined that Amy was murdered…” Rae stopped and looked down into her gray eyes.

Sarah’s eyes widened in horror. “No! That flatfoot suspects you? He’s out of his mind. There are a million reasons.” She walked away from Rae and continued her tirade. “Suppose she wasn’t murdered?”

Rae smiled affectionately as she walked down the hall. She stripped off her robe and threw on some clothes as Sarah continued in the living room.

“What if it was an accident? Does there have to be foul play?”

Rae stuck her head out the bedroom door. “Flatfoot? Foul play? I think you read too much. Be honest, you’re an Agatha Christie fan.”

Sarah walked down the hall and stood in the doorway. “Very funny,” she grumbled, then walked up to Rae, who was buttoning her blouse. Sarah gently pushed her hands away and finished for her. She could tell Rae was uneasy for some reason.

“We’ve got a little unfinished business,” she said, looking up at her.

Rae smiled for a brief moment and gazed into those gray eyes. “This was a definite mood killer. C’mon, we’ve got to find the girls,” she said abruptly and walked past her.

“So you want me to go with you? You struck me as a loner, Rae Jefferson,” Sarah said with a smug grin.

Rae looked right at her. “I am. So just come along and enjoy the ride, whattaya say?”

Sarah gave her a suspicious look. “As I said before, don’t get nervous. It’s okay by me, but do we have to ride in that contraption?”

Rae laughed as she pulled her out the door.

Chapter 12

The bar was crowded for a Monday night. Rae grabbed Sarah’s hand and pulled her through the crowd. Luckily, there were two barstools open.

Sally greeted Rae with a smile. “What in the hell brings you here on a Monday?” She then looked at Sarah and raised an eyebrow. “Hi, I’m Sally.” She stuck out her hand, which Sarah took, as Rae made the introductions and ordered drinks.

“Seen Jane or Pam at all?” she asked loudly above the din of the DJ.

Sarah glanced around. She hadn’t been in this bar for some time. She noticed the dance floor, packed like sardines... And the sardines looked awfully young.

Rae strained to hear Sally just as the music stopped and a slow song started playing. “Thank God,” Rae said and put a finger in her ear.

“I haven’t seen them since you all were here the other day,” Sally said.

Rae gave the bar a disappointed glance. Sarah looked, as well, although she had no clue what these girls looked like. Then she saw a blond, shapely young woman walk past her and up to Rae.

She put a hand on her shoulder, and Rae turned. “Joanna.” Rae couldn’t hide the surprise in her voice. With that, Joanna kissed her passionately. Sarah raised an eyebrow and just watched.

Rae struggled, trying to peel Joanna off. Finally, she wrenched her mouth free, avoiding the smug look on Sarah’s face.

“Rae, you bad girl. You didn’t call me.” Joanna pouted and pulled at Rae’s bottom lip. Rae laughed nervously and pushed her hand away.

“I-I... How are you?” she asked stupidly.

Sarah rolled her eyes. “Sally, may I have another?”

“Certainly.” Sally glared at Rae. “It’s on the house.”

“Oh, no, no. I couldn’t let you do that. Put it on Rae’s bill.”

“I’m fine now,” Joanna said, ignoring Sarah. “What say we blow this place and continue where we left off?” She seductively played with the buttons of Rae’s blouse.

“Sorry. Joanna, this is Sarah…” She started and stupidly stood there, her mind utterly blank.

“Connelly, Sarah Connelly.” Sarah offered her hand, and Joanna took it, glancing back at Rae.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you,” she said and turned to Rae. “Call me sometime.”

She then walked away and was lost in the sardine can of humanity. Rae turned back to the bar and gave an uncomfortable side-glance at Sarah, who was eating a peanut out of the bowl.

An awkward pall hung over them.

“An old friend?” Sarah asked.

Rae turned to her. She started to say something, then let out a helpless sigh. “Yeah, something like that.” 

Sarah reached over and took a napkin off the bar and handed it to Rae. “Red lipstick.” She motioned to her mouth, and Rae snatched the napkin away from her and rubbed her mouth.

With that, Jane and Pam walked in. Pam noticed Rae and stormed over to her.

“Uh-oh,” Sally said, and Sarah looked over.

Jane tried to pull at Pam’s arm, but she angrily wrenched her arm free. Rae turned as Pam walked up to her. Sarah could almost see Rae’s body tense.

“You lousy sonofabitch,” Pam exclaimed and took a roundhouse swing in Rae’s direction.

The sudden flurry of motion shocked Sarah. Rae moved so quickly, Sarah almost didn’t see it. She sidestepped Pam’s wild swing, and in one swift cat-like movement, Rae had Pam all turned around and in a stranglehold.

Jane pulled at Rae’s arm, and Sally reached across the bar and grabbed Rae’s other arm. Sarah stood behind her and put her arm on her back.

“Rae!” she exclaimed anxiously.

They might as well have been invisible. Rae whispered in Pam’s ear, “I could snap your neck so easily right now. Behave yourself.”

Sarah heard this, stunned at the change in Rae’s demeanor. She growled her threat almost like a wild animal. She then released Pam, who staggered forward, coughing and holding her neck. Jane put an arm around her.

The few female patrons who watched quickly dispersed, giving Rae a wary look. Sarah stared at her in disbelief. Sally took a deep, relieved breath and handed Pam a glass of water.

The dark look on Rae’s face scared Sarah. She knew she had a dark side, but she didn’t expect this.

Rae just watched, her muscles twitching as if she were preparing for another attack. Beads of perspiration broke out on her forehead and trickled down her temple.

“You could have killed me.” Pam nearly choked as Jane helped her onto a barstool.

“You’re hotheaded and much too emotional. One day, you’ll get yourself in real trouble,” Rae said, her voice void of emotion. She glanced at Sarah, who still watched her in silence.

“I take it you’ve spoken with McGrath,” Rae said dryly. She then turned toward the bar and picked up her drink. Sarah noticed how Rae’s hands shook as she lifted the drink. She put it down and pumped her fist once or twice as if to get the blood flowing. She glanced at Sarah, who smiled slightly.

“If you’re looking for the nearest exit, I can’t blame you,” Rae whispered to her.

Sarah smiled and shook her head.

“Yes, we just left him. They’ll do an autopsy. I suppose it’ll determine how…” Jane started but then stopped as she put a shaky hand to her forehead.

Pam put an arm around her and murmured her name. “It’s okay, baby.”

Rae winced, looking as though she wanted to say something, but Sarah walked over to Jane and put a motherly arm around her.

“Jane, we are sorry, truly. I liked Amy, and I don’t know why anyone would want to harm her.” Her voice was soft and reassuring as Jane buried her head into her shoulder and hung on for dear life.

Sarah rocked her back and forth, smoothing her hair. She whispered something, and Jane smiled and wiped her eyes. Sarah let her go and put her hand on Jane’s cheek and kissed her forehead.

“How about we go to my place?” Sarah offered. “I live just a few blocks away. We’ll have more privacy, and we can hear ourselves think.”

Rae then realized she was gaining admiration for this compassionate woman. Sarah took control of the situation in a way Rae had not.

*******

They sat around Sarah’s kitchen table as Sarah put the coffee on the stove.

Pam avoided Rae as she held Jane’s hand. “Sorry for taking a swing at you,” she said grudgingly.

“I’m sorry about Amy. I hope the autopsy shows something.” Rae pinched the bridge of her nose. She needed sleep, the sleep she knew wouldn’t come. She took out her cell phone and called Delia. She paced back and forth, and Sarah watched her cautiously as she listened.

Rae asked Delia if she could get her hands on the autopsy report.

“It’s in another precinct. Hell. I’ve got a friend over there. Let me see what I can do. No promises. I know McGrath. He’s a bit gruff but a good man. I’ll call ya.”

“We’ll just have to wait.” Rae paced once more. She then turned to Jane and Pam. “You don’t know if she was into anything? This Mike Porter or this other fellow.” She explained what he looked like and watched their reaction. They glanced at each other but said nothing. Sarah put the coffeepot down on the table. She too noticed the glance.

“Rae can’t help if you don’t level with her,” Sarah said evenly as she poured the coffee. “What about Molly Eastman?”

Jane took a deep breath and started to say something, and Rae saw the warning glance from Pam.

“If you two know something, you’d better tell me or McGrath. Look, I’m sorry about Amy. I know she was a close friend. However, she had my business card on her, and I don’t recall giving it to her.”

Pam interrupted her. “Not your style?” she asked rudely. Jane sighed, and Sarah rolled her eyes.

Rae, however, gave her a wary grin. “No, it’s not. Contrary to what you might think, which by the way, I don’t give a flying fu—”

“Coffee, Rae?” Sarah interrupted gently as she thrust a mug into her hands. Rae stopped and rubbed her forehead. With that, her cell phone rang.

“Hold on to your wig,” Delia said on the other end. “They’re still doing the autopsy. However, I talked to my guy. He was there when they found her. He said it looked like an accident. No marks or stab wounds and no bullet holes. He can’t be sure, but his first impression was an accident. She might have been walking and stumbled. Happens all the time. But don’t jump the gun. The autopsy should be done by tomorrow, and maybe we’ll have some definite answers. Then we’ll see from the toxicology report if anything was in her system. Oh, by the way, found out about the house in Evanston and your trio. I’m off-duty.”

“We’re at Sarah’s.”

“Good. I’ll stop by.”

Rae snapped the cell phone, sat, and explained. Pam looked relieved and sat back in her chair. Jane was still staring at her cup, tears welled in her eyes. Rae felt horrible for her.

Jane wiped her eyes. “If it was an accident, what was she doing down by the river?” she asked absently as she blew her nose.

“Why? Would it be odd for her to be there?” Rae leaned in a bit. Pam frowned.

“No,” Pam said flatly and put an arm around Jane. “Let’s not think about anything until the police let us know.” Jane nodded, and Pam looked at Rae. “Can’t we skip this for the night? It’s a lot to take in.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Sarah stood. “It’s late, and none of us has eaten. I for one am hungry. How about some ham and eggs?”

 She busied herself at the stove when Delia arrived. “Smells good, I’m starved,” she said happily.

Rae groaned. “What else is new?”

She introduced Jane and Pam. Delia looked at Jane and cocked her head as she smiled. She tore herself away and shook Pam’s hand.

“Sorry about your friend,” Delia said to Jane, who looked up through teary eyes and smiled a thank you.

Delia sat and rubbed her hands together. “Ham and eggs, yummy.”

Sarah laughed quietly as she filled the plates. Rae gave Delia an exasperated look, and Delia smiled happily. “You lucky woman, you. So tell me how well you knew Amy,” she said to Jane and Pam as she poured her coffee.

“We met freshman year and roomed together for that year. I was close with Amy and her parents. They’re adorable. God, they’ll be devastated. When I met Pam, we all became fast friends.” Her voice trailed off, and Pam looked uncomfortable. Delia glanced at Rae, who was absently stirring her coffee. Sarah wondered if she was paying attention at all.

With the meal finished, Pam stood. “Professor Connelly, thanks for everything, I think I’d better get Jane home.” Jane gave her a curious look as she stood.

“Thanks, Professor,” Jane said, again near tears. Sarah hugged them and walked them out of the kitchen.

She poked her head back in. “Don’t you dare talk without me,” she warned, then disappeared.

“An accident?” Rae asked.

Delia shrugged. “You know how these things are,” she said, and Sarah walked back into the kitchen and sat. “The autopsy will determine. So your business card?” she asked curiously. Rae rubbed her forehead and winced as she touched the small bandage on her brow. “That doesn’t sound like you. Were you planning on selling her a security system?”

“Funny. I know I did not give that girl my card. She must have taken one out of my wallet. We met, went to dinner, I drank too much.” She stopped and avoided Sarah’s smug look. “What did you find out about the trio?”

Delia snapped her fingers. “Almost forgot.” She flipped open her notebook. “Mike Porter lives at that address. So far, he’s clean. I’m still checking on him, though. Molly Eastman, no records. Can’t say about the other guy until I get a name.”

Rae got up and paced. “What about the car? I know I...” She stared, then looked to the heavens. “Shit, what an idiot! The red sedan. It was at ComTele this morning. I know it.”

“Nothing yet, DMV is still working on it. Tomorrow, for sure. Now you think the other night was a coincidence, or were your brains rattled on purpose?”

Sarah all at once got a little worried. She had forgotten that someone attacked Rae. Rae seemed oblivious to it, as if it were second nature to her. She wondered what she was getting into here. That night, Rae showed a very dark side, and Sarah wasn’t at all sure she wanted to get involved with this. However, her curiosity was piqued, and she knew she was falling for Rae Jefferson.

“Maybe it’s all unrelated. Maybe I was just mugged. Maybe Amy Davis did stumble into the Chicago River and drowned. Maybe that red sedan means nothing. Maybe Amy’s apartment was ransacked for no reason.” Rae looked at both of them. “And maybe I’m Admiral Halsey,” she finished sarcastically and sat.

They all looked at one another.

“What are you thinking?” Rae asked Delia.

“The autopsy. How about you?”

“That red sedan.” Rae glanced at Sarah. “Professor?”

Sarah smiled, picturing Rae in her military uniform.

Chapter 13

Rae knew it—another sleepless night. The dream woke her up at one as she sat on the edge of the bed. Once again, dripping in sweat, Rae clung to the pillow and rocked back and forth. She rubbed her shoulder and forearm as it ached horribly, not sure if it was a physical pang or just the residual mental crap from that day. She decided to blame it on the weather. “This miserable, damp autumn.”

She stood, stretched, and headed for the bathroom as her phone rang. It was Sarah.

“What are you doing up at this hour?” Rae asked as she sat back down on the bed.

“I don’t know. I’d apologize for waking you, but I knew you wouldn’t be sleeping.”

“And how is it that you know that?” She lay back against the pillows and smiled. She could almost see the smile on Sarah’s face; maybe she hugged her pillow, as well.

“I lived with an insomniac for ten years, remember?”

“That’s right. What happened?” Rae asked, seriously intrigued, then she yawned as Sarah’s soft voice lulled her.

“We just didn’t mesh. Her job had her traveling quite extensively for the first five years. It was a struggle for me at first. I wanted more attention than she could give. Then I didn’t need the attention, and I somehow think she was grateful.” She heard Rae’s deep breathing and chuckled.

“Commander Jefferson, you sound like an obscene phone caller.”

Rae chuckled and nestled the phone in her ear. “I’m sorry. You must know that you have a wonderful rhythm to your voice. I find it so easy to listen to.” She yawned again. Could she actually sleep?

“Well, thank you. I tried it on my ex. She got annoyed,” Sarah said softly.

“Annoyed? With your voice? Not possible.” She sighed.

Sarah looked at the receiver, then put it back to her ear. “Thank you again. You can be quite charming when you want to be. Now do me a favor.”

Rae smiled, looking at the ceiling. “Anything.”

Sarah chuckled. “Well, for now, just close your eyes and think of a time when you were happy and content, not a care in the world.”

Rae closed her eyes and thought. She was ten. Climbing her favorite tree. Once at the top, the summer breeze gently blew, and Rae remembered how she would slowly sway back and forth as she looked out over the lake.

“Got it,” Rae said.

“Now concentrate on that and find some peace, if just for tonight. Good night, Rae,” Sarah whispered into the phone.

Rae’s breathing became deep and peaceful. She thought for sure she said good night.

She woke in the same place with the phone still on her pillow. Smiling, she stretched and looked at the clock.

“Shit,” she cursed and jumped out of bed and ran to the shower. It was almost eight, and her appointment at ComTele was in one hour.

“Shit, shit,” she grumbled as the hot water nearly scalded her.

Dressing quickly, she dashed out the door and laughed openly as she drove down the street. For the first time in four years, she actually slept more than two hours. “Professor, professor.” She sighed as she drove, much too fast.

*******

Professor Whitfield sat in the teachers’ lounge, drinking tea and reading. She looked up when Sarah entered. “Well, good morning. Why are you grinning like a schoolgirl?”

“Good morning, Betty.” Sarah chuckled, poured a cup of coffee, and sat next to her. “Am I grinning?” she asked, grinning.

Betty rolled her eyes. “Like the Cheshire cat. Now tell me truthfully. Have you bedded this sullen woman yet?”

Sarah shot her an amazed look and spilled her coffee. She reached for a napkin and glared at Betty.

“Betty, you insane old woman. What kind of a question is that? I mean…really.” Sarah sputtered and mopped up her mess. Betty waited and watched her. Sarah caught the look and sighed. “No,” she said in a disappointed voice.

Betty let out a disgusted grunt. “Woman, what are you waiting for? If you could have seen the way she was mooning over you at your classroom door.”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous. I hardly think Rae Jefferson is the mooning type,” Sarah said in a haughty tone. She gave her a side-glance. “Really? She was mooning?”

Betty nodded as she drank her tea. “Like a love-struck idiot,” she said dryly.

Sarah hid her constant grin in her coffee cup. She tried to be nonchalant, but Betty noticed her hand slightly shaking as she drank her coffee. She truly loved Sarah Connelly. When she first arrived at Northwestern, the other members of the faculty immediately embraced her. Sarah had a way about her. She was smart and sarcastic, and at the same time kind and generous. She seemed comfortable in any social situation and had an innate ability to cut through all the muck and get right down to the center of things. Betty often wondered why she was single. Then as she grew to know her, Sarah let her in and told her.

The woman she was involved with for ten years...dumped her, for lack of a better word. It left Sarah disillusioned for quite a while. Oh, she dated on and off for the last few years, but no one reached what Sarah so desperately needed. It seemed funny to Betty that Sarah’s sexual orientation was not a major concern to anyone. Not being one to hide, Sarah had been open but not flaunting. Her private life is her own, as it should be with anyone, Betty thought. She seemed comfortable with herself and her life. Betty found this truly refreshing and captivating; Sarah Connelly’s enthusiasm toward life was extremely contagious.

She now looked at Sarah, who was sitting there staring. The grin was gone, and a worried look took its place.

“What’s bothering you?” she asked, breaking Sarah’s reverie.

“Oh, I don’t know.”

She then told Betty of the day’s sad events. Betty frowned as Sarah told her about Amy Davis. She shook her head sadly and drank her tea.

“Dead? How dreadful. Can your Rae do anything?”

“She’s not my Rae, and I don’t know.” Sarah then told her what happened the previous night at the bar and Rae’s altercation with Pam. Betty’s eyes widened as she listened.

“She was involved in something when she was in the navy. I can feel it. Something happened to her. If you could have seen the dark look in her eyes. There was one time when she looked like she wanted to tell me, but that didn’t happen.”

“We all have our dark sides. Your Rae seems to be running from something. Take care, dear, you don’t want to get run over,” Betty said seriously. Sarah looked at her and only nodded.

*******

Rae sat at the long table as the four directors signed the contract. She glanced through more information than she had previously received. “This is all of them then?”

The older man looked up and nodded. “All employees, past and present. Names, addresses, Social Security numbers, photo IDs, all of it. Do you really think this is necessary?”

Rae raised an eyebrow and nodded. “Trust me, gentlemen. You have no idea what a disgruntled employee can do. I’m just going to give this to my people and have them do an extensive background check. You must understand you now have government contracts. Your research here is very important, and you need security, lots of it. And I’m not telling you that because I’m in the business. I’m telling you that because I have experienced what rotten security can do,” she said firmly. The village in Syria flashed through her mind as she closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead.

“You all right, Rae?” he asked seriously.

Rae took a deep breath and smiled. “Fine. Now I’ll call my contractors. They’ll be in touch tomorrow and get the ball rolling. You should be up and running within two weeks.” She gathered the files and left.

As she drove through the security gate, she exchanged a wave and smile with Jim. Then out of the corner of her eye, she thought she saw someone walking up to the doors of the building. She craned her neck to see who it was and thought she got a glimpse of red hair. She stopped her jeep and looked through the back window. Whoever it may have been was gone.

She flipped open her cell phone and called her contractors and gave them the okay to start. Then she called Delia, who had heard nothing from the DMV on the red sedan, but she’d keep her posted.

“Bureaucrats,” she mumbled and flipped off her phone. She decided to go to Northwestern. Perhaps she could see Molly Eastman and her two friends. Somebody’s got to know something. Then she thought of Jane and Pam. Pam seemed uneasy when talking about Mike Porter. Rae wasn’t at all sure she trusted any of them.

She had a nagging feeling something was going to unravel soon. She only hoped she or the police would find a common thread before it did.

While Pam was on her mind, she decided to drive to her bookstore. Sitting in front of the shop, she got a good look at Pam as she stood behind the counter ringing up a sale. Rae’s old instincts, which frankly sucked, made her wary of Pam, but she couldn’t place why.

She walked into the shop, and when the bell chimed as she opened the door, Pam naturally looked up.

 “Good morning,” Rae said nicely enough as she sidestepped to let the customer leave the store. “Nice little place,” she offered as she stepped up to the counter.

“It’s a living, barely,” Pam countered, concentrating on what looked like a shipment of books. “Heard anything from the police?”

Rae shook her head. “No. I think I may take a ride to Northwestern and have a chat with Molly Eastman. I have a hunch.”

Pam looked up. “What kind of a hunch?”

Rae shrugged and leafed through a book. “I don’t know. I think she knows something. As a matter of fact, I think you all know something.” She closed the book and looked at Pam. From the look on her face, Rae knew she was right.

“Just what is that supposed to mean?” Pam asked angrily.

Just then, the bell chimed, and a couple of customers walked in. Pam leaned back and smiled at them.

“It means just what it means.” Rae put the book down. “I’ll let you know what I find out from Molly Eastman.”

She then turned and walked out of the bookstore before Pam could say another word.

Well, now that she pissed off Pam again, Rae was on a roll, so she took a drive to theTwelfth Precinct to talk to McGrath. “Maybe I’ll piss him off, too,” she said as her cell phone went off. She looked at it first. “Hey, Delia. What do you have for me?”

“Well, first, I’m buried in paperwork, but I called my buddy at the Twelfth Precinct, and he gave me the news. Ready?”

“Delia…”

“Sorry. Okay. Amy Davis died Thursday, last week. Considered an accident. There was slight trauma to the head, but they determined she stumbled and fell headlong into the river. She also had a high blood alcohol level, which the coroner deduced was the reason for the accident. They’re still running more tests, blood gases and that, but he thinks it’s a closed case.”

Rae was silent for a moment as she watched the road.

“Well, at least you’re not a murder suspect,” Delia said. “What’s on your mind?”

“I don’t know. I feel like there’s something missing. Damn it. My instincts are shit. It’s nothing. Hey, how about dinner? I’ll call the girls and Sarah.”

“Sounds good. Just let me know the coordinates, Commander.”

“Stop calling me—”

Delia laughed and disconnected the call.

*******

Rae stopped in at the Twelfth Precinct to talk to McGrath. He sat in his office and looked up as she stood in the doorway. “C’mon in, I figured you’d show up.”

He watched her as she sat in front of his desk, “Coffee?” he offered, and Rae let out a deep breath and shook her head.

“An accident, huh?” she said, looking into his eyes.

McGrath smiled fatherly and nodded. “Yep, no marks at all, Commander. No fingerprints, no cuts, bruises.”

“No hits, no runs, no errors,” Rae finished absently. “Do you think it was an accident?”

He winced and tossed down his pen. “Miss Jefferson, the coroner’s office has made a decision. I was informed that the case was officially closed. I couldn’t get it opened again. Believe me, I spoke with the captain. No luck.” He rubbed his eyes. “He thinks we have enough real murders to solve. So what’s on your mind?”

Rae shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “Her apartment, for one.”

“Coincidence, robbery happens all the time.”

“I get my brain rattled.”

“Mugging. Happens all the time.”

“The three students,” she started, and he interrupted her.

“Could have been talking about anything,” he reminded her.

She stopped and rubbed her forehead.

“I’ll tell you what I did.”

Rae said nothing as McGrath put his glasses on and read from a sheet of paper. “Did some research on one Commander Rae Jefferson. Got her military records. She was a good sailor and advanced quickly through the ranks. Attached to the 101st Airborne for six months, then sent to Washington. And that’s where the trail ended. No further records of her military history.” He looked up over his glasses. “Seems odd.”

He leaned forward, and Rae looked at him. “Miss Jefferson, it’s officially determined that the death of Amy Davis was an accident. The police department can do nothing more. I can’t spare the manpower to check out the apartment again or to watch those three students. I can’t authorize my people to do that. Now if a concerned citizen happened to stumble on some evidence that may prove otherwise, then we’d be grateful. But this citizen would unfortunately be on her, or his, own. Perhaps if this person had contacts, it would help.”

Rae listened and knew exactly what he was saying. She smiled and nodded. “I’ve got great experience at being alone and on my own, Lieutenant. Well, perhaps something will turn up.”

They shook hands, but he held on to her hand for an instant longer. “I have no children, but if I had a daughter, I imagine she’d be like you. You be careful. I know you’ve got some kind of experience with this sort of thing. If there is something going on, remember there’s someone behind it. Watch your back,” he said firmly and let go of her hand. He then handed her his card and smiled.

Rae took it. “Thanks, really. I’ll keep in touch. I’m probably way off base. My instincts aren’t…” She abruptly stopped. “I’ll keep in touch,” she said and walked out.

He watched her as she gracefully and confidently walked through the precinct and out the door. He sat down, hoping he had done the right thing. He agreed with Rae Jefferson. Amy Davis was murdered as sure as he sat there wondering why.

Chapter 14

“I don’t see why we have to go to dinner,” Pam said defensively. Jane groaned as she brushed her hair.

“Because Rae said she wanted to talk to us. Her police friend will be there.”

“Is that why you want to go?” Pam asked angrily.

Jane shot her an incredulous look. “What does that mean?”

“I saw the way she looked at you the other night, and I saw the look in your eyes,” she said as she faced her.

Jane felt the color rise in her face, not sure if it was embarrassment or anger. “You’re ridiculous. Why must you do this with every woman who talks to me? If anything, I should have the trust issue with you,” she said. Pam glared at her and took a step toward her. “Don’t get macho with me, Pam. I know all about you and the woman in the bookstore. And we both know about Amy.”

Pam stopped and just stared at her, knowing she was right, but unwilling to admit it. She let out a disgusted grunt. “Amy was with everybody.”

Jane gave her a sad look. “And now she’s dead. Please, let’s let it lie. I’m sorry I brought it up. I’m not looking at any other women.” She took a step toward her and reached up to touch her cheek.

Pam’s eye twitched for a second. She took hold of Jane’s wrist and pulled it away from her face. Jane winced at the firm grasp she had. She then pulled Jane roughly to her, pinning her arm behind her. “You’re mine, Jane,” she said and kissed her.

Jane tried to pull away, but Pam pulled her back. Jane wrenched her mouth free, gasping for air. “Pam, don’t,” she said breathlessly as Pam released her. “Why must you make me feel…” She stopped and ran her fingers through her hair and turned from her.

Pam walked up behind her and kissed her neck. “God. I’m sorry, baby,” she whispered in her ear.

Jane softened and turned to her, putting her arms around her neck. “We need to talk about this. But for now, we need to get ready,” she said softly and kissed her.

“Okay. Let’s eat.” She touched Jane’s cheek, then walked into the bathroom.

Jane stood there for an instant staring at the bathroom door. She was getting tired of these mood swings. Then for some inexplicable reason, her stomach lurched, and she shivered violently.

*******

Rae pulled up in front of Sarah’s house. As she got out of the jeep, Sarah came down the walk. “Hey. Are we driving in that?”

Rae laughed at the serious look on her face. “No, we can walk if you like. It’s a nice Indian summer night.”

It was true. The fall colors were abundant, and the weather was warm as the sun faded behind the brownstones.

“Good idea,” Sarah said as they walked down the street.

They were quiet for a moment as Sarah stole a glance at Rae. She was frowning, staring at the ground as they walked.

“A penny for your thoughts,” she said.

“You’ll get change. I went to see McGrath today.” She explained her conversation with him. Sarah listened intently, saying nothing. Then she stopped and looked at Rae.

“If it’s an accident, why must you go further?” Sarah asked in a worried voice. “You don’t think it was an accident, do you?”

Rae shook her head and painfully pinched the bridge of her nose. Sarah noticed the tiny circles under her eyes. She looked tired and worn. “No. I don’t, and I don’t know how to explain it to you.” She gave her a helpless look. For an instant, she looked lost and alone. Sarah’s heart lurched as she watched her.

“Look, I don’t know what’s going on, but I can’t get it out of my mind. I feel responsible,” Rae said tiredly.

Sarah reached up to cup her face in her hands. Rae seemed shocked as she looked down into Sarah’s eyes. “Rae, you can’t bear the weight of the world forever. You’ve got to put down that bag of bricks sometime.”

Rae frowned for an instant. She tried to pull away, but Sarah held her fast; her hands felt warm and soft against Rae’s face. Rae took a deep quivering breath, turned her face, and kissed the palm of Sarah’s hand.

“I don’t deserve this,” she whispered.

“We’ll see about that.” Sarah smiled and let go.

As they walked down the block, Rae quite naturally reached over and took Sarah’s hand in her own. Both smiling, they walked the rest of the way in comfortable silence.

*******

Delia was sitting at the bar flirting with the bartender. Rae and Sarah quietly walked up to her. Rae chuckled.

“Ensign Grainger!” she barked, and Delia jumped and spilled her drink.

“Damn it, Commander,” she cursed and wiped her shirt. Sarah watched them as Rae laughed and slapped her back.

“Flirting? Are you off-duty?” Rae asked. “Let’s get a table.”

Delia grabbed her drink and smiled at Sarah. “Professor, still with this two-headed officer? And you struck me as a smart woman,” she said sadly as Rae pulled her off the barstool.

*******

“So you had a visit with McGrath?” Delia asked as she buttered a roll. “What’d he say?”

As Rae explained, a woman—a very attractive woman—came up to Sarah.

“My God, Sarah Connelly!” she exclaimed, and Sarah looked up and blinked, then smiled broadly.

“Sharon...Good grief, what are you doing in Chicago?” She started to get up, but Sharon put a hand on her shoulder.

“Don’t, I’ll come down,” she said and raised her eyebrows up and down. Sarah blushed horribly as Sharon kissed her. Rae immediately frowned and looked back and forth between them.

Delia raised a mischievous eyebrow and pushed the basket under Rae’s nose. “A hot, steamy roll?” she offered. Rae glared at her and snatched a roll out of the basket.

“I’m sorry, Sharon. This is Rae Jefferson and Delia Grainger. Sharon is an old…friend.” 

With handshakes all around, Delia seized the opportunity. “Well, would you like to join us?”

“Oh, no. Thanks, I was just leaving. I have plans for the evening. Look, are you still at Northwestern?”

“Yes, I suppose I’ll die there,” Sarah said dryly and drank her wine. Sharon laughed aloud and put a hand on her shoulder.

“I miss that sense of humor. Well, I’ve got the number. I’ll call you next week. We’ll go out and catch up,” she said, then kissed her again. “I can’t believe I ran into you.” She excused herself and walked away.

Sarah smiled as she watched her walk out of the restaurant. She gave her attention back to the table. Rae was frowning, eating another roll. Delia was sipping her drink and grinning wildly.

“So. She’s gorgeous. Tell all,” Delia said; Rae grunted.

“Good grief, it’s none of our business,” Rae said and drank her wine.

“Oh, I don’t mind,” Sarah said, hearing Rae mumble something. “We met four years ago at a teacher’s conference in Milwaukee. At the time, she taught at Marquette University. I don’t know what she’s doing in Chicago,” she said thoughtfully and shrugged.

“So. Were you two...?” Delia prodded eagerly.

“Hey, what kind of question…?” Rae said.

“Yes, we were.” Sarah avoided Rae’s face. “Off and on for a year. She then got her doctorate and moved to California. A relationship from Milwaukee to Chicago is one thing, but California? No, we both agreed.”

“Hmm. So now she’s back,” Delia said thoughtfully and stole a glance at the sullen Rae.

A lull fell over the table as Delia nonchalantly looked up at the ceiling and around the restaurant. Rae was tapping her fork on the table with annoying agitation. Sarah was buttering a roll. Mercifully, Pam and Jane arrived at the table.

After a few moments of idle chitchat, they talked more seriously about Amy. Jane arranged the memorial service for Friday, giving Amy’s parents enough time to come in from Michigan. Delia glanced at Jane from time to time. Rae noticed, and she gently kicked Delia under the table. A gesture not lost on Sarah.

Pam was noticeably irritated with something. Sarah hoped it wasn’t with Rae. A repeat performance from the bar the other night was something no one wanted. Rae stole a glance at Pam every now and then, and as Jane talked, she tried to gauge Pam’s mood.

“So I guess that’s that,” Jane said sadly and sipped her water. Pam reached over and covered her hand, then let it go. Jane didn’t acknowledge the gesture. Rae thought she might have even stiffened slightly. Delia seemed to notice it, as well, but avoided eye contact with Rae.

“It’s very sad, girls. I am sorry. What a horrible accident,” Sarah said and gave Rae a “well, the ball’s in your court now” look.

After a moment of silence, Rae finally spoke. “Well, I’m not quite convinced it was an accident.”

Jane gaped at her, and Pam stared at her glass. Jane leaned in. “Why not?”

“Her apartment, for one. Someone ransacked it. The police are chalking it up to coincidence. I’m not sure I agree.”

Pam leaned forward. “What makes you an authority on any of this, anyway?” she asked pointedly.

Rae agreed it was a fair question. She glanced at Delia, who shrugged. “I’m not an authority, but I’ve had experience with this sort of thing from my military background. So suffice it to say, I know what I’m talking about.”

Pam made a rude grunt into her napkin. Jane ignored her and watched Rae. “So what are you thinking?”

Rae took a drink of wine and thought for a moment. “Let’s get all our ducks in a row. First, I’d like to look at Amy’s apartment again. Someone went through it on purpose. It wasn’t a robbery. I noticed the TV, stereo, and computer still there. Maybe there’s something the police missed. Second, I know this Mike Porter and his two friends are linked to this some way…” Her voice trailed off in thought for a moment.

No one said a word. Sarah listened intently, quietly amazed seeing this side of Rae. Pam fidgeted with her glass as Jane listened. Delia was smiling slightly with a look that Sarah thought was admiration. This must be a side of Rae Delia knew very well, a long time ago, Sarah thought as she turned her attention back to Rae.

“Delia, can you get her phone records for the last, say, two weeks? I’d like to see who she’s been talking to. Is there any way I can get my hands on that autopsy report?”

Delia winced. “I don’t know. I’ll see what I can do, but I highly doubt it. Maybe McGrath might have it on his desk, and maybe...”

“Maybe I could just be sitting there when he goes out for a cup of coffee,” Rae finished, and Delia shrugged.

“Strange things happen all the time.”

“Make it happen for me?”

“Will do.”

Sarah watched the two of them, seemingly oblivious to the rest of them. “All of this is a hunch?” she asked, a bit confused. Rae looked over at her and smiled. Sarah Connelly’s heart started doing the mambo...

“Yes, it’s a hunch, but I think there’s something here. Something everybody has overlooked. I need to get back into her apartment.” She looked at Jane and Pam.

Pam’s frown deepened, but she said nothing as Jane reached into her purse and took the key off the ring. “Will you go alone?”

“Yes,” Rae said.

“No,” Delia and Sarah said at the same time.

After dinner, Pam decided it was time to leave. Jane was disappointed but said nothing as Pam led her out of the restaurant. The three of them sat there and said nothing as they watched them go. Rae noticed how Delia looked at Jane.

“How long have they been together?” Delia asked as she drank her coffee.

Rae smiled slightly. “A year, I think. Why?”

“Oh, nothing. Just being a cop.” She watched the door.

Sarah smiled, as well. “Pam certainly is a bit on the grumpy side.”

“I don’t suppose I blame her. A good friend dies,” Delia offered.

Rae, however, wasn’t buying it. “Did you notice her reactions whenever I talk about Amy and the possibility of her being murdered?”

Delia nodded. “I did.”

“The other night at Sarah’s, she was a bit on the nervous side,” Rae said thoughtfully.

Delia nodded again. “Remember that pilot at the Naval Air Station in New Orleans? He was the same way when you questioned him about his wife.”

Sarah said nothing but just listened, hoping to get some insight into Rae’s past.

“Lying bastard,” Rae said rudely, and Sarah raised an eyebrow, trying not to breathe and break the spell.

Delia chuckled, then got serious. “You saved that woman, that’s a fact, Commander.”

Sarah now raised the other eyebrow and sat still. She glanced at Rae, who was staring off as if remembering. “Everybody did their job well on that one.”

“You saved her life, though. If you hadn’t gotten there when you did.” Delia stopped and looked at Sarah. “The commander here had a hunch.”

“Delia…” Rae grumbled and shifted in her seat. Both of them ignored her.

“A hunch about this pilot, or was he a navigator?” Delia shook her head. “Doesn’t matter. Anyway, his wife was missing, he reported it, and the search was on. The whole base was on alert. After two weeks of grilling this pilot, Rae had a hunch. She remembered some obscure comment he’d made almost a month before. How she remembered it, I don’t know. Anyway, she put two and two together. This crazy fuck had his wife tied up in the basement of his parents’ house in New Orleans while they were on vacation. He was going to kill her. Rae had the authorities barge in just as this lowlife was about to cut her throat.”

Sarah gasped openly and put her hand to her heart. “No.” She sighed in amazement. Delia nodded proudly, and Rae just glared at her.

“Yep,” Delia said, and Rae bounced a sugar cube off her forehead.

“Blabbermouth,” she said halfheartedly and stole a glance at Sarah. “Okay, enough war stories. I’ve got a ton of paperwork for my client,” Rae said nervously. She loved the look she was getting from Sarah, but at the same time, it scared her to death.

*******

They stood outside the gate. Sarah gently kicked at the sidewalk. Rae played with the fence.

“How about some coffee? If it’s not too late,” Sarah offered.

“Well, maybe just a cup. I’ve got a ton of…” Rae said as Sarah opened the gate and walked ahead of her.

“Paperwork, yes, I know,” she countered. Rae took a deep breath and followed her up the walk.

They no sooner got into the foyer than Sarah boldly reached up and pulled Rae’s tall frame down to her, kissing her tenderly as they stood in the dark hallway. Rae sighed as their lips met in a soft kiss. Sarah’s hand wandered behind Rae’s neck and caressed. The sensation made Rae quiver as she pulled Sarah closer.

Suddenly, there was a definite urgency in both of them. The next kiss was more passionate as Sarah’s fingers entwined in Rae’s hair, urging her closer. Their tongues met in a playful dance as they moaned quietly, the feeling rocking both of them.

“Sarah,” Rae whispered against her lips as she dipped her head farther to kiss her neck.

Sarah gasped at the feeling of Rae’s warm lips on her neck, and she threw her head back to offer more. Rae smiled and nibbled the offered flesh.

“We can’t stand in the hall all night,” Sarah said breathlessly.

Rae pulled back and smiled. “No, I won’t do this in your doorway,” Rae said in a low voice that sent shock waves through Sarah.

“I’ll put the coffee on,” Sarah said in an unsteady voice as she pulled away.

Rae smiled affectionately and pulled her back. “All of the sudden, I’m not thirsty.” She kissed her cheek, then nibbled at her ear before traveling back to her lips. Sarah felt Rae’s satiny tongue once again glide slowly into her mouth. Her head reeled from Rae’s soft caresses.

Finally, she pulled back and laughed nervously. She put a hand up as Rae took a step toward her. “No. Coffee. I’m making coffee.” She felt lightheaded as she turned. “If I can make it to the kitchen.”

Rae threw up her hands. “Okay. Coffee it is.”

“Make yourself at home,” Sarah called out as she disappeared into the kitchen.

Rae smiled and turned on the light by the couch. She walked around, looking at the seemingly endless bookcase. Row upon row of every author imaginable, from fiction to nonfiction. Sarah Connelly must be a voracious reader. Rae walked around the living room looking at the books, then made her way back to the couch and noticed a picture on the desk. Picking it up, she noticed right away it was of Sarah, a younger Sarah.

Rae smiled, thinking she really didn’t look that much different. Oh, a few strands of gray, but other than that, Sarah Connelly kept her age very well. The other woman in the picture looked like an aunt or a mother. There was a similarity between the two. There were two other pictures of people, probably relatives, nestled comfortably on the desk and in the bookcase. It occurred to Rae then just how solid Sarah was. She was educated, funny, and charming. None of this Rae found in the women she had been with. Sarah Connelly had great depth, and Rae suddenly had a great pang of insecurity.

What in the world would Sarah want with her? She drank too much, and she played around too much. Rae Jefferson was completely unaccustomed to this: a mature, compassionate woman who had her head on straight.

“Who am I kidding?” she whispered in disgust and ran her fingers through her hair. She then flexed her aching shoulder.

“Sore, Commander?” Sarah’s lilting voice called out from the hallway. Rae whirled around to see her standing there with a pot of coffee and cups. She made her way to the couch and put the tray on the coffee table. “Or just old age?”

“Sometimes I feel like it,” Rae said as she sat next to Sarah.

“You should have someone look at it. I have a great chiropractor,” she offered as she poured. Rae watched her and smiled. This woman was completely at home in any situation and had the ability to make everyone feel comfortable.

“How do you do that?” Rae asked as she took the cup from her.

Sarah gave her a curious look. “Well, it’s simple, really. I prefer to do it the old-fashioned way. You fill the coffeepot with water and put six to eight scoops,” Sarah started, “depending on your level of caffeine overload.”

Rae put her cup down, leaned over, and kissed Sarah soundly. Sarah, caught off-guard, let out a surprised gasp.

After a moment or who knows how long, Rae pulled back. Sarah was pleasantly surprised to see the stupefied look on Rae’s face.

“You bring the water to a boil and let it perk for about five minutes,” Sarah finished breathlessly. She looked into Rae’s eyes. Rae blinked and looked at Sarah as if she were some sort of alien. “What in the world is wrong?” Sarah asked, confounded.

Rae stood. “I have to go. I have so much paperwork to do. Thanks for the coffee and dinner. I had a marvelous time. I’ll call you tomorrow.” Rae stumbled over herself and the coffee table.

Sarah sat there, gaping at her. “Well, okay. Whatever, that’s fine. I had a good time, as well,” she said, clearly confused as she stood. “Are you all right?”

Rae backed up toward the door. “Oh, sure. Yes, I’m fine. I…” Rae stopped abruptly as she banged the back of her head on the hallway doorjamb.

Sarah winced for her and walked over to her. Rae had opened the door, and she stood there looking down into those gray eyes.

“My coffee really isn’t that bad. Is it?” Sarah reached up and ran her fingers through Rae’s hair.

“No, actually. It’s all too good. Look, I gotta go.” She hurriedly opened the screen door, then turned to Sarah, quickly pulling her into her arms. “I’ll come and see you tomorrow,” she whispered and nearly ran down the steps.

Sarah stood there with her hands on her hips and watched as Rae pulled away. “Why, that big fathead.” 

Shaking her head, she closed the door and turned off the lights. “I probably should’ve made tea.” She sighed as she headed upstairs...alone.

Chapter 15

The phone ringing woke Delia from a heavenly dream. All she remembered as she fumbled for the phone was the smiling face of Jane Whiting.

She grabbed the phone. “What?”

“I’m a fucking idiot,” Rae barked into the phone.

Delia opened one eye and looked at the clock. Two thirty. “And I’m not. What’s wrong?”

For the next minute or so, Delia listened to Rae explain just how idiotic she had been. Delia yawned wildly and pulled the blankets up. She nestled the phone on her ear and listened.

“You’re not an idiot. Well, not about this anyway. For the first time in your life probably, you met a woman of substance, that’s all,” Delia said through a yawn. She heard Rae breathing. “Are you there?”

“You’re right. What am I thinking, I don’t belong with her. Look at my life. I’m a mess. I can’t commit to anyone. I vulgarly chase young women. No...I can’t do this to her. I’m nowhere in her league. I’ll only hurt her.”

Delia rolled her eyes and looked at the ceiling. “You deserve a good woman because you are a good woman. You’d better be careful, you might lose her. Of course, if that’s the plan...” Delia grinned; she could almost see the anger in Rae’s eyes.

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Push them away enough, they’ll leave. It’s what we did. We could never have a partner, not a real one anyway. We saw what it did to the married officers.”

She heard Rae take a deep breath. “All of them had problems, some of them even divorced. You’re right. The covert, undercover world is unforgiving. It doesn’t care who it destroyed as long as the assignment was completed. The greater good.”

Delia said nothing when she heard the quiet tone of resignation in Rae’s voice. Before Naval Intelligence, Rae Jefferson was funny, smart, and sexy. She had her affairs and such, but once the navy knew what a gold mine it had in her, Commander Jefferson allowed the service to swallow her up. Wanting a career doing something for the greater good, she took every assignment they offered. Traveling mostly, more in the background. She was the brains. However, when that tenuous and diplomatic situation came up in Syria, she had her chance to be the brawn, as well, to put her training to good use. Delia only knew it ended horribly. Rae never talked about it, ever.

“I miss Mike,” Rae said out of the blue

Delia raised an eyebrow in surprise. “Gunny Walchek? I remember him. Is he retired?” The idea flashed through Delia’s mind then.

Rae laughed. “That’s Master Gunnery Sergeant Walchek to you, Ensign Grainger, and no, he’s not retired. The marines got him at Camp Lejeune terrorizing the masses, I would think. Due to retire next year. He was good to me, taught me a good deal.” Her voice trailed off. “Shit. I’m sorry. I just looked at the clock. Go back to sleep. I’ll call you tomorrow. I hope you can get that autopsy report.”

“I’ll do my best. Try to sleep. And you’re not an idiot,” Delia said and hung up.

Delia sat on the edge of her bed in the dark. She looked at her phone and wondered if what she was thinking was a good idea.

She raised an eyebrow and dialed.

*******

Sarah glanced at the clock during every class she had. Rae had not called at all during the day, which made Sarah preoccupied and unorganized, something that rarely happened to her.

“Professor Connelly, are you all right?”

Sarah looked up to see several students standing by her desk. “Yes, why?”

“You were sighing.”

“I was?” Sarah looked at the curious faces and laughed. “I’m fine, ladies and gentlemen. And no, I’m not going through some midlife crisis. As a matter of fact, I’m too old for midlife. So scram.”

The students laughed and filtered out of the classroom. Completely deflated, Sarah picked up her briefcase and headed back to her office where she sat, impatiently drumming her fingers on her desk. She leaned toward the phone. “Ring, will you?”

She heard a man’s gruff cough and looked up. An older man in a marine uniform stood before her. His green uniform was covered with so many medals and red chevrons up and down his arm. Sarah didn’t know where to look. She blinked a few times, feeling the need to stand and salute.

“May I help you?” she asked.

The man smiled slightly and walked in, taking off his cap. “You can if you’re Sarah,” he said firmly. “Sarah Connelly.”

“Well, that’s me. Please sit down.”

He offered his hand. Well, Sarah thought it was a hand. It looked like a Virginia ham. It engulfed hers as he gave it a healthy pump. Sarah’s poor arm jerked, then he let go. It was better than any adjustment her chiropractor gave her.

“I’m Sergeant Mike Walchek. We have a mutual friend,” he said and sat in front of her. Sarah sat and immediately knew he was talking about Rae.

“Rae Jefferson,” Sarah said, and he nodded. Then she had a horrible thought. Rae hadn’t called all day. The government usually sent someone to deliver the telegram. God help her, her Irish imagination galloped out of control.

“Is she all right?” She leaned in, then shook her head. “God, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know. No, tell me, I want to know. Is she hurt? You can tell me.”

Sergeant Walchek smiled and cocked his head as she rambled. Feeling stupid, Sarah immediately stopped. She let out a nervous laugh while he continued to smile.

“Well, I haven’t seen her yet. I’m assuming she’s fine.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Well, let me rephrase that. She’s alive, but she’s not really living,” he said profoundly.

Sarah sat back and looked at him. “Why are you here?”

He took a deep breath and looked at her. “To give you a little insight, maybe I can be of some help. I got a call in the wee small hours from Ensign Grainger, well, Detective Grainger now. She filled me in on the situation with Commander Jefferson. So I hopped on a plane from Camp Lejeune.”

“You came all this way for Rae?” Sarah asked, completely intrigued.

He smiled again. “May I call you Sarah?” he asked, and Sarah nodded. “Well, Sarah, I would do just about anything for Commander Jefferson. She’s one in a million, and I guess I took her under my wing. She’s like family, and I take care of my family. Especially when they’re in trouble.”

Sarah raised an eyebrow. “And she’s in trouble?”

He nodded. “The worst kind—heart trouble.”

All sorts of scenarios raced through her poor mind. Heart trouble. God, she is sick, she thought sadly and stupidly. “Can’t she go to a specialist?”

He immediately stopped smiling and gave her an incredulous look. Sarah looked around the room, not understanding. “I mean, in this day and age, surely…”

Sergeant Walchek gave her a fatherly smile. Sarah immediately turned bright red. She felt the color rising and instantly needed air. She quickly stood and walked over and opened the window, taking in a whiff of oxygen. What an idiot, she thought.

She turned and chuckled nervously. “I’m usually quicker on the uptake, Sergeant Walchek. I find myself all turned around by your commander,” she said honestly and sat.

He laughed quietly. “I know all about Rae’s sexual orientation. I’ll tell you I don’t understand it. And being from the old Corps, it’s been hard for me to adjust to the gay situation. But I’ve seen too much, and when you’re standing shoulder to shoulder with a guy and you trust him to watch your back, you really don’t give a hairy rat’s ass what his sexual orientation is.” He smiled. “Ma’am.” Sarah laughed as he continued. “All that aside, one thing I do understand is Rae, and that’s all that matters. I just wanted to meet you before I saw Rae.” He looked into her eyes.

“She obviously has told you very little or nothing at all.” He shook his head. “Well, she’ll have to tell you. She needs to get it out or it will destroy her. And you need to listen.”

It almost sounded like a threat. Sarah tried to find some moisture in her mouth to swallow. “I already told her I would listen. It didn’t go over well, as you might imagine,” Sarah said dryly, remembering once again the angry encounter. “What happened to her?”

He looked at her for an instant and hesitated. For a moment, Sarah thought he would change his mind. “Syria, four years ago.” He stopped and took another breath and stretched his neck, looking as though he’d like to loosen his tie. “Rae was a seasoned officer in Naval Intelligence. She was the smarts behind many operations. The navy trained her mind, I trained her body, and she was very good.”

“GI Jane?”

Mike laughed heartily. “No, I love her, but a Navy SEAL she ain’t. But you didn’t hear that from me.”

Sarah laughed along with him until he continued. “On this last situation, we needed a woman to go in. It was to be simple, fast, and quick. I can’t go into the details, but it went wrong. A young Navy SEAL died, and Rae took a nice chunk of shrapnel. You may have noticed a little scar.”

Sarah nodded and smiled at the understatement.

“Rae blames herself. Everybody had his position, except this youngster. Rae and I told the brass not to send him. No one listened. In any event, it went sour...” His voice trailed off for an instant. Then he took a deep breath.

“It was tragic, but it was life. Rae took it on her shoulders. I suppose I would have, too. Afterward, she became distant and emotionally detached. She got herself fixed up with the oddest women.” He laughed as he remembered a few situations. He then looked over at Sarah, who was sporting a smug look. He cleared his throat. “Sorry. It was a long time ago.”

He stood and put on his cap. Sarah was amazed at his size; he was all muscle and well over six feet tall. “I’d better go and check in with Rae. She’s gonna be all piss and vinegar when I tell her I met you first.” He laughed, almost relishing the encounter.

Sarah stood and walked him to the door. “I’m glad you came, Sergeant Walchek. I appreciate the insight. I’d like to help her, too,” she said, looking at the floor.

Sergeant Walchek took her by the shoulders and gave her a shake. “I like you. I can see what Rae likes. She needs someone like you. Don’t let her give you any shit, uh, grief,” he corrected himself and blushed. Sarah laughed and reached up to kiss his cheek.

“Thanks,” she said. He winked and walked out.

Sarah closed her door and walked over to the window. For the first time, she felt a part of Rae Jefferson’s life.

And quite simply, she liked it.

Chapter 16

Rae sat at her dining room table with papers strewn all over as she tried to sort out the employees of ComTele. She hadn’t showered. She was in sweats, a T-shirt, and her robe. She was exhausted. It was only four in the afternoon, but it felt like midnight. Her eyes were stinging with fatigue as she glanced at her phone. She hadn’t called Sarah all day. Her stomach did flip-flops at the very thought of her.

With that, her doorbell rang, and she grinned. She hopped over her briefcase and flew to the door.

Mike snapped off a salute. “Afternoon, ma’am. Got a cold one?”

Rae was dumbfounded. She started to cry, burying her face in her hands as she stood there. Mike pulled her into his arms and hugged her fiercely. “Let it go, Commander. It’s time to let it go.”

She sobbed uncontrollably, feeling foolish, but she couldn’t stop it. Years of sad desolation just kept pouring out. Mike almost lifted her off her feet as he closed the door. They stood in her doorway for a moment or two longer before Rae pulled back and dried her eyes on her robe.

“Fuck me.” She sniffed as Mike chuckled. “I feel like a stupid female.”

“You are a stupid female,” he said gruffly and pushed her back. “Now what does a non-com have to do to get a drink in this house?”

Rae laughed and led him into the dining room. “Have a seat, Mike.”  She came back with two beers. “What in the world are you doing…” She stopped and looked at him. “Delia. I’m gonna kill her.”

“She was right to call me. You should have,” he said firmly. “I hear you’ve got a bit of a situation. A dead woman? Hmm.” He frowned deeply and shook his head. “Rae, if they don’t want you, you should just let them go.”

Rae shot him a look, then burst into laughter. His irreverence was an odd but welcomed relief. She explained the predicament as he listened, drinking his beer.

“So you think she was bumped off?” he asked incredulously.

“I think so. I just need some common threads.” She shrugged and took a swig of beer. “Naval Intelligence taught me a great deal, but I’m out of my depth with homicide. I’m just going on instincts.” She looked up to see Mike staring at his beer, almost avoiding looking at her. “Okay, Sergeant. What’s up?”

He looked at her and smiled before he took a long drink. “I took the liberty of seeing your teacher before I came here.”

Rae’s eyes widened in horror. “You what?” she bellowed, and he winced. “What the hell for? Goddamn it, Mike,” she continued and paced back and forth. She then turned to him, her eyes blazing. “What did you tell her? Shit. You have no right.”

“I have every right. You’ve been wallowing in this crap for four long years, blaming yourself for Higgins, blaming yourself for the mission. Goddamn it, it wasn’t your fault!” he bellowed back. “It was a tragic mistake. Tragic and fucked-up. Now you’ve got a chance to turn yourself around. What are you prepared to do?”

Both of them were breathing heavily like two bulls. “Are you going to join the living or feel sorry for yourself for the rest of your sorry-ass life and be alone?”

“I’m no good for anyone,” Rae cried out helplessly.

“Well, there’s a pretty teacher who disagrees with you,” he said in a quieter voice. “What are you prepared to do?”

Rae leaned against the wall and jammed her hands in the pockets of her robe. “I don’t trust my heart anymore,” she said for the first time. “I’ve only known her for a few days, but I think I may be falling hard. And it scares me to death.”

He smiled and walked over to her, taking her by the shoulders. “Then as I said to you before, don’t be a pussy, ma’am. Take that woman and make her your own.”

Rae suddenly wrenched free from his strong grasp. “Fuck. Make her my own. Are you nuts? What in the world would she want with me? Really? Look at me. Sarah Connelly is normal, for chrissakes. She’s alive and happy. What could I possibly have to offer her?” she asked angrily as the tears sprang into her eyes.  “Goddamn it, I killed him,” she cried helplessly as she beat on his chest.

Mike stood and took the blows. He gently grabbed her arms and held them. “Higgins was out of position. We were all ready to fire. You saw the gunman, you took aim, and you fired. You were right to fire. You had position. Higgins was told to stay down. You had no way of knowing.”

Rae stared off in a trance. Neither of them noticed Sarah standing in the doorway. With the front door opened, she had heard the arguing from the porch. She walked in and heard it all.

“I saw, but I didn’t want to shoot. Killing someone was not in my training. When I hesitated, Higgins…”

“Higgins was wrong. You know that. Your hesitating had nothing to do with his lack of experience.”

Rae turned away from Mike and pounded her fist against the wall. Mike stopped her before she succeeded in putting her fist through it. “I killed that poor boy.” 

Sarah stood frozen, unable to move. That was when Mike caught a glimpse of her and shook his head. Sarah didn’t know what to do, so she just stood there.

“Rae, you need to get this out. You need to talk about it with someone other than me,” he said.

Rae turned and hugged him for dear life and sobbed. “I can’t. I can’t tell anyone.” 

“Yes, you can. Tell Sarah, she cares, and you know she’ll listen.”

“How can I expect someone to understand this when I don’t?” She continued to sob.

Sarah turned and walked out of the house.

“I’m exhausted, Mike. And I’m sorry…”

They both heard the doorbell ring. Rae immediately pulled back and once again dried her eyes on the sleeve of her robe.

“God, now what?” she exclaimed, then put her hands on Mike’s big shoulders. “Mike, I’m sorry. Give me a minute…”

She walked over and opened the door. Her heart couldn’t take any more of these shocks. Sarah stood at the front door.

“You look like hell,” Sarah said. “I waited all day, so I thought I’d stop by and…” She stopped and looked at Mike.

“Well, Sergeant Walchek, we meet again,” she said nicely.

Mike smiled fatherly. “Sarah,” he said in manly fashion.

Rae was just staring at Sarah. “I...This is Sergeant…well, you know who he is. We were just. I don’t know.” She threw up her hands in defeat.

Sarah gave her an affectionate smile. She reached up and put a hand on her cheek. “Everything is fine,” she said in a soft voice.

“Is it?” Rae couldn’t ignore her heart as it pounded in her chest.

Mike put on his cap and smiled. “Well, I’ve got a plane to catch.” He then walked over to Rae and hugged her fiercely. “And you have a life to get on with,” he whispered and kissed her forehead.

Overcome with emotions, Rae tried desperately to stop the tears that welled in her eyes. She nodded and kissed his cheek. “I love you, Mike.” Her voice was a mere whisper.

Tears sprang into his eyes as he grunted and rubbed his nose. “You’d better,” he barked, then turned to Sarah. “Sarah, take care of her. God help you,” he said emphatically and kissed Sarah on the cheek.

Then as quick as that, he was gone.

Rae stood there staring at the closed door. She turned back to Sarah, who smiled.

“You haven’t slept at all, have you?” she asked, not waiting for an answer as she walked down the hall.

Curious to see what she was doing, Rae slowly followed her. She heard the water running in the bathtub and raised an eyebrow. Sarah came out drying her hands on a towel.

“Okay, a hot bath is what you need. Go on,” she ordered.

“Sarah, I’m fine. You don’t…” she started, and Sarah pushed her toward the bathroom.

“Shut up and soak your head,” Sarah said firmly and closed the door.

Rae eased herself into the steamy bubbles and sighed heavily as she put her head back. She closed her eyes, and for a little while, she felt human. She was almost asleep when she heard the bathroom door open.

“Don’t get nervous. I’m coming in,” Sarah’s voice rang out.

“That’s fine. I can’t move anyway,” Rae said dreamily.

Sarah came in with two glasses of wine. “I know alcohol is not a recommended cure, but in this case, I think you could stand it.” She sat on the edge of the tub. “Something about a bubble bath and wine. They go together.” She handed her the glass.

Rae looked up, her eyes still red with tears. “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome. Now you have a good soak.” She started to get up, and Rae reached out and grabbed her arm.

“Stay and talk to me, please.”

Sarah put the lid down on the toilet and sat. Rae chuckled as she put her head back and closed her eyes. “A safe distance, Professor Connelly?”

“Not really, but it’ll do, Commander Jefferson.” Sarah smiled nervously and took a healthy drink of wine.

Rae set her glass down, not drinking. “There is so much shit in my life. I don’t know where to begin. However, when I’m done, if you want to walk away, I will completely understand.”

“Why don’t you let me worry about that?” Sarah said softly. Rae nodded and began.

“I was in Naval Intelligence for nine of my twelve years in the service,” she said, and Sarah’s eyes widened as she interrupted her.

“You were a spy?”

Rae lifted her head and looked at her. “Uh, no. No glamour in this story. For the first few years, I was more or less in the ‘think tank’ part of Intelligence. I assisted in the planning of many small covert operations, nothing major. As I gained experience, they gave me more in-depth authority. As the years went by, I saw a great deal. I saw men lose their identity, their wives. Some of them lost themselves in gambling, women, and drinking. I knew they were trying to purge themselves of what they had seen. However, never knowing the undercover world firsthand, I was only speculating. But we all saw what was happening in Iraq and Afghanistan. Just as you folks did.

“Then after eight years of hard work behind the scenes, I got my chance. The navy wanted me trained quickly. I trained for a short time at the marine base at Camp Lejeune. That’s where I met Sergeant Walchek. We took to each other right away, and he volunteered when he heard about this mission.” Rae stopped and took a drink of wine. She looked over at Sarah, who was listening intently and smiled.

“Go on,” Sarah urged.

“We were to get an ambassador and his wife out of Damascus, Syria. They were not supposed to be there. We weren’t told why, just to get them out quickly. I was to go as a reporter and get close to them. Stay by them until the Navy SEALs got into position. Then we were to get them the hell out of there fast from this little coastal village outside of Tartus. I can’t tell you who they are or why we needed them out,” Rae said. “I’d have to kill you.”

She looked at Sarah and laughed at the dumbfounded look. “I’m teasing.”

“You big jackass. What happened to you?” Sarah rolled her eyes as she took a drink from her wineglass.

Rae closed her eyes, feeling the moment of lightheartedness between them dissipate. Her lip quivered; she felt the tears again well in her eyes. When she felt Sarah kiss the top of her head, she opened her eyes. “Why don’t you get out of there before you become a prune? Then we’ll finish. I’ll go make some coffee, decaf if you’ve got it. You’ll sleep tonight if it’s the last thing I do.”

*******

Rae slipped into her robe. When she walked into the living room, Sarah had the fire blazing.

Sarah came in with coffee and sat on the couch. “Okay. All clean and shiny. Now continue.”

Rae rubbed her hands together and paced in front of the fire. She stopped several times, looking back at Sarah, who said nothing, concentrating on her cup of coffee.

“A guerrilla officer found out what we were doing. He found out about me. Everything was going according to plan. I was to stay in Damascus with the ambassador and his wife, then get them to the rendezvous point. Mike was at the end of this village, near the shore. The chopper was to come in at a specified time, and I was to meet them there. I got them almost there. Then this asshole came out of nowhere. I saw him and turned, yelling at the ambassador and his wife to run for the end of the village.

“He grabbed me, and we struggled. Anyway, I was petrified but somehow got my knee in his groin. As he crumbled, I ran to the destination at the end of the village where all hell broke loose. I couldn’t see the ambassador or his wife at first, then I noticed them huddled in the corner of a building. Mike was behind a car motioning me to stay low. I made my way over to them. She was hysterical.” Rae chuckled sadly.

“I was too angry and too damned scared to be hysterical. That came later. Anyway, Mike was close and tossed me a handgun. I had no idea what I was going to do. Then we heard the chopper. I was never so glad to see anything in my life,” Rae said. Sarah was riveted to her seat; she seemed shocked and amazed at the story. Rae tried to gauge her mood.

“What happened?” Sarah asked seriously.

“The fricking gunman was on the other side of the building. I saw him, so did Mike. I had a clear shot, I hesitated…” She stopped and swallowed before she continued, “the young SEAL, Higgins, saw the chopper, and in his inexperience, he stood and started for it at the same time I decided to shoot.”

She heard Sarah’s gasp and stared at the flickering flames and continued. “I shot him,” she said in a voice void of emotion. “I shot Chief Petty Officer John M. Higgins of Portland, Oregon. Twenty-three years old. I shot him in the chest and missed the gunman, who had time to heave a grenade in our direction. It went off near me. I didn’t know what had happened. But I was still standing, holding my weapon pointed in his direction. I remember Mike yelling at me to get down, but I couldn’t. All I saw was Higgins lying there in a pool of blood with an incredulous look on his face as he looked at me, calling my name.”

Her voice trailed off as she stared at the fire. “Then out of the corner of my eye, I saw the gunman. My mind went blank. All I can remember is that I fired at him again and again.” She laughed rudely. “Of course, I missed him. Mike got him. One shot.” She stopped and ran a shaky hand through her hair. Sarah said nothing; Rae watched her, wondering what she was thinking. She thinks I’m insane, that’s what.

“Did you get that scar from the grenade?” Sarah asked.

Rae rubbed her eyes and nodded. “Shrapnel. If I didn’t have my arm raised, the pieces would have hit my chest instead of my arm. And I wouldn’t be standing here like some pathetic loser,” she finished angrily. She stopped and turned away from Sarah again to stare at the fire.

Sarah walked over to her and stood behind her, not touching. “Well, that’s quite a story. You’ve been carrying that around for years, not telling anyone?”

“I dream of it every night. I picture that young boy bleeding all over the sand, and I can’t get to him. God help me.” She hung her head against the mantel.

Sarah reached out, put her arms around her shoulders, and laid her head against her back. Rae sobbed quietly. “I’m no good for you. Please, go.”

“No, I’m afraid it’s much too late for that,” Sarah whispered as she kissed her shoulder. “Come now, you need to sleep. You’re exhausted. This is enough for one night.”

Rae turned and looked down into her eyes. “Thank you. I mean that sincerely. It’s unbelievably easy to talk to you. I do appreciate it, no matter how this turns out,” she said, not looking at her.

Sarah smiled affectionately and pulled her down to her. Rae’s arms naturally went around her waist and pulled her close. Sarah put her arm around her shoulder as she started toward the bedroom.

Rae stopped and frowned. “Sarah, I don’t want you like this. I mean, I do want you, but I don’t. I’m not...You’re too…” she stumbled horribly, feeling strangled by her emotions.

Sarah led her down the hall and said nothing as she gently pushed Rae toward the bed. She pulled back the covers, and Rae crawled in. Sarah then pulled the covers up and smoothed back her hair. “Sleep.”

“Are you leaving?” Rae asked, almost asleep, but Sarah heard the urgency in her voice.

“No. I’ll stay until you fall asleep,” she said softly and sat on the edge of the bed.

“Talk to me. Say anything. I just want to hear your voice.” Rae yawned and closed her eyes.

Sarah smiled and ran her fingers through Rae’s hair. Rae smiled and sighed.

“Okay, you nut…” Sarah whispered.

Rae felt the soothing fingers sift through her hair. She had no idea what poem Sarah was reciting, but her low lilting voice felt like an angel singing.

Her soft voice stopped, and Rae sighed happily. “Did I hear something about daffodils dancing?”

Sarah chuckled quietly. “Yes. Now go to sleep,” she urged and continued to caress her forehead.

Rae had no idea how long she slept but woke with a start when she felt the bed move. Her eyes flew open, and she grabbed Sarah’s arm.

“It’s okay, Rae. It’s Sarah,” she said quickly.

Rae still held her arm. “Don’t leave,” she pleaded. “Please stay.”

Sarah pulled back the covers and crawled in next to her. Rae sighed dreamily as Sarah put her arm around her and pulled her close to her breast.

Quite naturally, Rae nuzzled into her and put an arm across her chest. Sarah smoothed her hair and kissed her forehead.

“Sleep, Rae,” she whispered.

Rae fell asleep with the image of golden daffodils fluttering in the breeze.

Chapter 17

Rae hugged the soft pillow close to her and opened her eyes. Her eyes widened in surprise to see she was lying on the pillow, and the pillow was Sarah, who quietly snored. Frantically, Rae remembered the night.

She had told Sarah the whole story, and she was still here. Rae smiled and nuzzled closer, completely content to rest her head comfortably on Sarah’s soft breast. She sighed and quietly said a prayer of thanks for this woman. No matter how it wound up between them, Sarah Connelly would always be a wonderful friend; Rae knew that in her heart.

Although that was not all she wanted from her. Suddenly, all sorts of mental images raced through her mind as Sarah’s breasts heaved slightly with each peaceful breath she took. Lying on her side, Rae lifted her head and shifted to balance on her elbow so she could watch Sarah sleep.

She looked wonderful. Her soft skin begged to be caressed. Rae noticed Sarah was still in her clothes. Rae smiled as she remembered her crawling in next to her to comfort her. What a woman, Rae thought. Then she frowned, wondering if this was all Sarah wanted from her. Now she felt like a lecherous, aroused woman.

God, what kind of an idiot am I? Rae thought. She couldn’t help but think that Sarah was attracted to her. They’d exchanged wonderful kisses; the last drove Rae wild. She had to leave her house before it went any further. Never had a kiss done that to her. Never had such emotion filled her heart for one woman.

Surely, Sarah felt something, as well. Rae smiled wickedly as she watched Sarah breathing peacefully. Two buttons of her blouse were already opened, dangerously exposing her breasts. Rae quelled the urge to go exploring. Although she did reach over and cup her breast.

Sarah stirred and sighed, smiling in her sleep. She half turned, and her face was dangerously close to Rae’s.

How much can one woman take? Rae thought as the ache between her legs grew with each passing moment. She then took the chance and leaned toward her and gently touched her lips to Sarah’s.

Still sleeping, Sarah smiled and stirred, letting out another contented sigh. Rae rolled her eyes, stifling a childish giggle, and tried again. This time, she kissed her deeper.

That did it. Sarah’s eyes flew open, and she pulled back. Rae was smiling happily. “Good morning.”

Sarah blinked a couple of times, completely disoriented. Rae leaned on her elbow and sported a contented grin. Her pulse quickened when Sarah glanced at her open robe.

“Good morning. How did you sleep?” Sarah smiled nervously.

“Like a baby. I don’t think I moved all night,” Rae said tenderly. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Her grin turned to a frown. “Hey, wait a minute. How long have you been awake?”

Rae laughed out loud and put her hand on Sarah’s hip and caressed. “Long enough. You lose a couple of points for snoring. Still, it’s better than drooling.”

Sarah grunted and rubbed her eyes. “Very funny,” she grumbled. She reached over and caressed the lapels of her robe, her fingertips daring to brush against her breast. “So I’m glad we talked last night,” she said, avoiding her eyes.

“Yes. I am, too.” Rae smiled fondly and reached up to play with her auburn hair. “Thank you for staying. It’s not easy for me to ask for help.”

“You’re quite stubborn, but I’m happy I was here for you.” She touched her cheek. “So what’s your day like?”

Rae noticed the playfully lilting voice and raised an eyebrow. “Now just what did you have in mind?”

Sarah winked, and Rae raised the other eyebrow. Sarah then reached back and picked up the phone and dialed.

“Betty, I know it’s early, sorry I woke you. Everything is just fine. Would you have Professor Nelson take my classes this morning? Better yet, have him take all my classes for the day. Thanks. What? Yes, that’s exactly what I plan on doing, dear.” She hung up the phone and turned back to Rae, who was smiling happily.

“What did she ask you?” Rae asked curiously.

Sarah put her arm around her waist and pulled her close, their faces inches apart. “She asked if I was going to bed that sullen woman. You heard the answer,” she whispered against her lips. “Now kiss me before I jump right out of my skin.”

“Yes, Professor,” Rae murmured and kissed her deeply.

Sarah sighed as Rae’s warm lips parted her own, her tongue playfully exploring Rae’s mouth. She then rolled Rae onto her back and gazed into her blue eyes.

“A woman could die happily looking into those eyes.” She reached over and untied her robe.

Rae closed her eyes and smiled as she felt Sarah push her robe away from her body and caress her skin.

“God, Sarah.” She moaned and put her hands behind her head. Sarah smiled as she dipped her head, tenderly kissing her breast. Her tongue slowly encircled her aching nipple; she was pleased to see it harden under her caresses.

Sarah’s hand wandered over and cupped her other breast, and Rae let out a small gasp as she arched her back slightly. “Good God, you have the softest touch.” Rae’s voice trembled, trying to maintain control.

Sarah said nothing as she continued kissing her breast, her tongue now flicking over the hard nipple, eliciting small gasps from Rae. “You are in tremendous shape,” Sarah managed to pull her head back and say before continuing.

Rae was beside herself; she could only nod and gasp at the same time. This woman knew how to love, that was certain.

Sarah’s hand wandered down to caress Rae’s flat stomach, her fingers swirling around her navel, then traveling farther. Rae twitched with anticipation as she felt Sarah’s fingers glide over her hips and farther still.

Instinctively, Rae parted her legs, welcoming Sarah’s caresses. Sarah looked up and smiled as her hand wandered farther. Rae, with eyes closed, bit her bottom lip as she felt Sarah’s fingers gently probing. “God,” she exhaled and chuckled. “Don’t tease me now.”

“Oh, I think you can handle this,” Sarah whispered into her ear.

Rae’s head was spinning after minutes of heavenly torture. Sarah’s gentle probing found its mark, her fingers stroking back and forth until Rae arched her back. She broke out into a sweat as she reached up and grabbed the rungs of her headboard.

“Sarah!” she cried out breathlessly.

Sarah continued, feeling Rae becoming completely aroused as she parted her legs farther. Rae then burst into a glorious orgasm, her body twitching, unable to control herself. She cried out Sarah’s name again and again before slowly descending. Sarah then took her hand away and caressed farther down, her fingers gliding over the moist opening before inserting one finger. Rae let out a cry of pleasure as Sarah thrust deeper. Soon she had Rae crying out, begging her not to stop. Rae took as much of Sarah as she could until Sarah felt the walls within Rae tighten around her hand.

Rae cried out helplessly as her body shook uncontrollably before she came to a thunderous orgasm again. Sarah continued and slowed her rhythm, controlling Rae’s body.

“Amazing.” Rae’s voice was ragged as she began to feel her body exploding yet again. “No more,” she said halfheartedly, and Sarah knew she had a bit more in her.

“Almost,” she whispered seductively.

Rae laughed nervously, then hung on to the headboard for dear life. Once again, her body twitched as she felt Sarah’s warm hand within, moving in and out, driving her wild.

She came with such intensity that she thought she might faint. Wave after wave consumed her as she reveled in Sarah’s touch. She felt her kissing her breast, her neck, and finally, Sarah lay almost on top of her.

“Open your eyes,” Sarah said in a coarse voice. Rae opened her eyes and gazed into those gray eyes. Sarah smiled and kissed her tenderly. “Now once more,” she whispered against her lips and plunged as deeply as she could.

Rae arched her back and let out a scream of pure ecstasy as her final orgasm nearly knocked them off the bed. “Geezus!” she cried out as she pulled away from her.

Sarah wrapped her arms around Rae, who clung to her as she trembled uncontrollably. Sarah smiled and kissed her cheek, then nibbled at her neck.

“My God, woman. I’ve never…” Rae said amazed as she lifted Sarah’s face to hers.

Sarah smiled again and playfully raised her eyebrows up and down. “Not bad for an old woman, eh?” she joked.

Rae laughed and rolled her eyes. “My God. Amazing. You’re amazing. There’s an awful lot of experience behind that touch.” Rae sighed and pulled her close, her body still tingling.

She noticed Sarah stare off for an instant, her mind elsewhere. “What are you thinking?” Rae caressed her cheek.

“Nothing, nothing,” Sarah lied, and Rae gently pushed her onto her back and loomed over her.

“No evasive tactics. Give,” Rae said firmly.

“Look, I know I don’t compare to the type of woman you attract. You go for the…young rookie. I’m the seasoned veteran. I have experience, true, but I know I show my age. I don’t live with any illusions,” she said. “Crappy analogy, I know.”

Rae was completely stumped. Then it came to her. “You silly woman. I know I’ve spent my time with young women. I won’t deny it. However, you are something altogether wonderfully different and much more appealing. You have great depth. And you are very, very attractive, believe me.”

She then lowered herself and kissed Sarah with such passion that Sarah was lost for a moment. Her senses were failing her as Rae continued. Finally, Rae pulled away, leaving Sarah completely breathless and wanting more. Rae smiled, seeing the wanting look in Sarah’s eyes. She slowly unbuttoned the remainder of her blouse, then dipped her head and kissed the top of her full breast. “Heavenly,” she whispered against her skin.

The vibration sent a shock wave through Sarah, instantly hardening her already aching nipples. She squirmed for an instant and let out a small gasp.

Rae’s kisses traveled up her neck, gently nibbling. Sarah shivered at the feel of Rae’s lips on her neck. She instinctively put her head back to offer more. “My neck is very sensitive.”

Rae smiled happily as she nibbled farther. “Any particular spot?”

Sarah sighed openly. “No, no. Any ole spot will do.”

Rae chuckled and continued the sweet indulgence. She then reached over and cupped her full breast. She quickly unhooked the front of her bra, releasing a feast that took Rae’s breath away. “You are beautiful,” Rae said as she gazed at the offering before her.

Sarah was a bit self-conscious. No one ever called her body, any part of it, beautiful before. Instinctively, she tried to pull her blouse around her.

Rae frowned and pulled her hand away, holding it above her head. “Don’t. Don’t ever hide, not from me.” She looked into her gray eyes.

“Kiss me quick,” Sarah pleaded.

Rae obliged. She kissed her tenderly at first. Their passion grew as Rae cupped her full breast and rubbed her aching nipple until Sarah plunged her tongue into Rae’s mouth.

Rae now groaned wildly, amazed at how this woman could stir her passion so quickly. She pulled away and lowered her head. Suddenly, she was ravenous. She kissed, licked, and suckled one breast, then the other, seemingly unable to get enough of Sarah’s soft skin.

Sarah in turn was beside herself. No one ever paid this much attention to her breasts before. Her body was twitching and quivering at the same time with each pass of Rae’s tongue. She let out a small cry of pleasure as Rae nipped and kissed her breasts. Sarah then felt Rae’s strong hand glide over her torso. Masterfully and with great quickness, Rae had her slacks unzipped and in one movement had them off. She then discarded her blouse, and Sarah was now naked... And extremely vulnerable.

Rae felt this. She cupped Sarah’s face and kissed her tenderly. “I’m not in very good shape. I…” Sarah gasped as she felt Rae’s strong but gentle hand explore unfamiliar territory.

“Will you keep quiet, woman? I love your body. It’s wonderfully soft and feminine. Absolutely amazing.” Rae sighed as she once again feasted on Sarah’s breasts.

Her kisses traveled farther as Sarah put her hands over her face and chuckled nervously. It had been three long years since anyone had seen her naked. Of course, it would have to be someone who was in excellent shape. Instinctively, she once again tried to suck in her stomach. Oh, what the hell, she thought.

Rae kissed her stomach as her hands explored her soft, full hips. “Heaven,” she murmured again as her cool tongue playfully darted in and around Sarah’s navel. Sarah arched her back, then looked down at her and smiled. She reached down and ran her fingers through Rae’s hair, her fingers gently entwined.

Her breathing became erratic. Oh, God, she’s not gonna do this, she thought. Then she felt Rae move farther down her body, urging Sarah’s legs apart. God, she is gonna do this, she thought nervously.

“Rae, It’s…it’s been quite a while for me,” she whispered with a touch of terror.

Rae looked up and grinned. “Then the time has come, sweetheart. I think you’ve waited long enough, and I can’t wait any longer. I need to taste you.”

Sarah then let out a small cry as Rae lowered her head and kissed her inner thigh. She heard Rae murmuring her name against her thigh, once again sending shock waves through her. Sarah still had a hold of her hair; now she was pulling her closer. Her legs parted as far as she could. Stupidly, she was feeling like a wishbone on Thanksgiving.

Rae was still murmuring as Sarah felt her warm fingers pushing back the defensive folds. Once exposed, she heard Rae sigh as she leaned in for a tender kiss. Her tongue skillfully gliding back and forth brought Sarah’s heart rate off the charts.

“Rae!” Sarah cried out as she felt Rae’s cool tongue exploring parts of her that no one had for quite some time. She almost forgot how wonderful this feeling was. She didn’t want it to stop. She told Rae, in so many words.

Sarah was shocked at her own lustful behavior. For some ridiculous reason, she thought of Betty and what she would say. She quickly dismissed that. Concentrating on Rae’s experienced lovemaking, Sarah found herself writhing on the bed, begging Rae not to stop while holding her head firmly in place.

No woman had ever loved her like this for this long. Her breathing was nonexistent as she looked down at Rae. “Are you...okay?” she asked stupidly as she arched her back. Rae paid no attention. Sarah cursed herself for such a ridiculous question.

Sarah felt her body tense. She knew she was near her peak. Rae knew this, as well, and plunged her tongue deeply, making one or two passes, and that was all she wrote. Sarah screamed as if someone was being murdered. Calling out Rae’s name over and over again, evoking every saint from the heavens, Sarah broke in an unbelievable crashing orgasm. She felt as though she was having some kind of seizure as her body bucked and writhed.

Rae was holding on to her for dear life, still loving her, not wanting it to end. Never had she wanted to please someone so. Never had she felt so much passion for another woman.

Finally, Sarah’s legs clamped shut, nearly suffocating Rae, who was forced to stop or die. Sarah was almost whimpering as her body slowly stopped trembling.

If she said, “Oh, my God,” one more time... Rae quickly moved over her, still lying between her legs and resting on her elbows, both bodies sensually glistening as Rae kissed her trembling lips. Sarah tasted her own arousal as Rae smoothed her damp hair off her forehead.

Sarah opened her eyes and gave her an incredulous look. Rae smiled happily. “Hello,” she said, and Sarah laughed and put her arms around her back, her nails gently scraping up and down. Rae closed her eyes and arched her back slightly, boring her hips into Sarah’s.

“God, woman, you have the softest hands...” Rae’s voice was a bit ragged.

Sarah once again shivered at the confident, erotic sound of her voice. They gazed into each other’s eyes, saying nothing. Rae kissed her once again, her tongue parting her lips, slowly exploring. Sarah couldn’t believe she was getting aroused all over again. She didn’t know she had this much passion in her. She sensually rubbed her legs up and down Rae’s hard, lean buttocks, drawing out deep moans from Rae as she continued kissing her.

Both were exhausted, but neither wanted to stop. Rae sighed and pulled back, breathless. “I could get lost in your kisses,” she whispered, and Sarah nodded.

“As could I. So, get lost, will you?” she said with a wicked smile.

“What a woman,” Rae exclaimed happily and kissed her deeply.

For the rest of the morning, they explored each other in ways that neither of them thought possible. Sarah mentioned, albeit breathlessly, that at one point she felt akin to Lewis and Clark but without the canoes and the Indians. Rae laughed uproariously and thanked the gods above for this woman.

They loved and laughed and woke up everyone in the neighborhood.

Chapter 18

There was still the matter of Amy Davis’s death, Rae thought sadly as she showered. Sarah had gone home, only to change, and Rae grinned like a schoolgirl thinking about her. Then she shook her head and got back to Amy.

Someone killed her, she knew it. There were just too many coincidences. Her apartment ransacked, someone rattling Rae’s brains. Even Lieutenant McGrath thought there was something.

As she dressed, she thought of Pam. Something was up with that one. She was just a bit too possessive for Rae’s liking. The past few times she’d seen her and Jane, Jane seemed on edge. Maybe it was this whole mess, and maybe it was a little more.

She sat at her dining room table and tried to sort out some of the other mess she had going with ComTele. She rummaged through the employee files, trying to concentrate. However, the recollection of the morning’s activities happily invaded her senses. She chuckled out loud and tossed down her pen. “I can’t concentrate. That chick has me all turned around.”

Then she saw it. She cocked her head and pulled out the file from the bottom of the pile. “No way,” she said in amazement.

Michael M. Porter, the file name read. Rae blinked a couple of times. In the distance, she heard her doorbell ring. She went quickly to the door and opened it. It was Sarah, smiling.

“Good afternoon. Didn’t I just see you this morning?” she exclaimed happily, then frowned as Rae stood there, looking at the file.

“Hi, Professor,” she said absently and walked away.

“Hi, Professor? Is that all I get?” She followed Rae into the dining room.

Rae turned to her and smiled. “Hey. When did you get here?” she asked jokingly, and Sarah glared at her. “Now that’s the look I’m getting to know. What have I done?”

Sarah stood there with her hands on her hips. Rae looked nervously around the room, wondering what happened.

“Hi, Professor?” Sarah repeated.

Rae turned five shades of red and smiled sheepishly. “I, well, I found something here and…I’m sorry. You’ll have to know sooner or later. In the navy, when I’d get in a groove, I’d get preoccupied. I’m sorry.” She winced apologetically.

Sarah softened and pulled her tall frame down to her, kissing her deeply. “I forgive you. Now what did you find?”

Rae smiled and returned her kiss. “I don’t know yet. Sit.” She pulled out a dining room chair. Sarah took off her coat, and Rae sniffed the air.

“Geezus, what are you wearing? This will never do. It’s much too distracting,” she said seriously.

“Good,” Sarah said, happy with herself, and settled in. “Oh, I brought lunch and...dinner. Just in case we don’t get out of the house,” she said with a wicked grin.

Rae laughed and picked up the grocery bags and took them into the kitchen. “Take a look at the top file,” Rae called from the kitchen as she put away the groceries. She noticed the bread and lunch meat and decided she was ravenous.

Sarah looked at the pile and picked up the file in question. She read the name, and her eyes widened. “Mike Porter?”

“Yep. Read it out loud, will you?” Rae called as she prepared two sandwiches.

Sarah leafed through it, put on her glasses, and started. “Well, he works in the IT Department. A computer geek, I suppose. Been there for three years, part time mostly. He’s from Hayward, Wisconsin. I’ve been there. It’s beautiful, especially in the fall. The fishing up there is great, if you fish. Do you fish? Hey. I don’t know much about you, you know,” she called out as she leafed through the file. “Did you hear what I sa—?” She looked up to see Rae standing there with two plates, sporting a smug look.

Sarah laughed and took off her glasses. “Well, I don’t.”

Rae sighed. “I can see I’ll have my hands full with you.”

“If we’re lucky,” Sarah agreed emphatically.

“C’mon now, quit clowning. Give me that file and eat your lunch,” she scolded, and Sarah grunted as she munched on her pickle.

Rae leafed through the file as Sarah stole a glance every now and then. Rae was very serious, and Sarah noticed how caught up she was in this. This must have been what she was like in the navy, and she could see how Rae would feel responsible, how she would take it all on her shoulders. As strong and sexy as they were, her shoulders could not bear all of it, all the time.

This is why she doesn’t sleep, Sarah surmised. Twelve years of hiding, not allowing someone to love or be loved. Well, all of that would soon change for her, if she let it. Sarah smiled inwardly, knowing she had the inside track.

“Got me all figured out yet?” Rae asked absently as she concentrated on the file.

Sarah narrowed her eyes and tossed an olive at her. Rae looked up and plucked it out of the air in one swift movement and popped it in her mouth. Sarah gaped at her quick response. “Don’t be so smug, Commander,” she said, then cocked her head. “I like calling you that. Do you mind? I know you chastised Delia severely when she did it. But would you mind if I called you Commander? Only from time to time, of course,” she rambled.

Rae looked to the heavens for help. Then she looked over at that wonderful smiling face with those gray sparkling eyes, waiting for an answer. Rae, feeling like a love-struck moron, sighed openly. “No, I don’t mind at all,” she said seriously, loving the way it sounded. Never did she think she would hear that again and actually enjoy it. Only from Sarah. So many things she was discovering she liked, only from Sarah.

They stared at each other for a moment. Rae blinked and cleared her throat, concentrating on the file. Sarah grinned wildly and took a healthy bite of her sandwich.

“So Mike Porter works for ComTele.” Rae rubbed the back of her neck.

“Maybe it’s just a coincidence,” Sarah suggested logically.

“Maybe. Amy Davis was murdered, I’m sure of it. Mike Porter, Molly Eastman, and that redhead have something to do with it. I can feel it. Perhaps ComTele has something to do with this, as well.” She picked up the phone.

Sarah watched as she talked to Delia.

“Check him for priors or whatever you cops do.” She gave her his Social Security number. “Anything on the car yet?”

Rae cut her off, putting her on speakerphone. “Go ahead, Delia.”

“The car is owned by one Jerry Truman of Oak Park. Twenty-four, and he has a prior record. Seems he comes from money, been kicked out of two Ivy League schools. Confidence games. He liked blackmail. Three arrests, no convictions. Mommy and Daddy paid through the nose.”

“And he lives where?” Rae picked up a pencil. She heard nothing on the other end. “Delia, he lives where?”

Sarah was struck by the firm resolve in Rae’s voice. This woman was used to having what she wanted. She raised an inquisitive eyebrow, which Rae noticed.

“He lives in Rogers Park. 1445 Granville. That’s in…”

“I know, St. Gertie’s parish,” Rae said fondly. Sarah was astonished when she heard the name of the church. She grew up in St. Gertrude’s parish on the north side of Chicago.

“I know I can’t tell you what to do, but remember, you’re not the law anymore. Please be careful. If you’re gonna do something stupid, I can’t know about it. I am the law,” Delia said and stopped.

Rae and Sarah stared at the phone, then at each other.

“I can’t believe I just said that,” Delia said sadly. “Be careful and call me.”  She disconnected the line.

“She’s the law, you know,” Sarah reminded her, and Rae chuckled. “So how do you know St. Gertrude’s?” she asked curiously.

Rae shot a look at her and turned in her seat to face her. “I grew up in that parish.”

Sarah gaped at her. “So did I.” She leaned in.

“How old are you?” they asked simultaneously.

Sarah laughed, and Rae rubbed her eyes. “Tell me,” she insisted.

Sarah leaned back indignantly. “You tell me how old you are.”

Rae hung her head. “Christ, you’re odd... I’m forty-seven.”

Sarah sighed unhappily. “I’m fifty-one. I can’t believe we went to the same grammar school. I wish I would have known you. Heavens, you were a baby.”

Rae grunted. “This is much better. I don’t think I could have made love to you knowing we shared the same nuns.”

They stared off into space, avoiding each other as they took a sip of beer.

“You’re right. This is infinitely better,” Sarah said as they touched their bottles in agreement.

They spent the remainder of the afternoon rummaging through the files. Rae was trying to sort out the employees for her security check. She kept the file on Mike Porter separate.

Jane had called and informed them that the wake was to be the next day at Barr Funeral Home in Rogers Park. Sarah and Rae knew where it was. The funeral, of course, was the day after. Amy’s parents had come in from Michigan. It was to be a small quiet service.

“How is everything? Do you still think Amy was murdered?” she asked, and Rae paced up and down.

“Yeah, Jane. I do, but I’ve got too many loose ends. I need a common thread.”

Then Jane asked a curious question. “Will you call your friend Detective Grainger? She’s been so helpful. I don’t expect her to come, but I thought she’d like to know.”

Rae agreed to tell her. She noticed a sad, faraway tone in her voice. “Everything all right, kiddo?”

There was a pause for an instant. “Yes, of course. I, well, I’ll see you all tomorrow.”

Rae couldn’t help but hear her voice crack with emotion. “Okay, Jane. Don’t worry. We’ll all be there. I’ll call Delia.”

She put the phone down and stared at it. Then explained Jane’s request. “Don’t you think that’s odd?”

Sarah smiled slightly but said nothing. Rae watched her curiously.

“Okay, what’s going on in that literary head?”

“I don’t think it’s odd at all. Jane Whiting may be young but smart. I don’t get the connection between her and Pam. I don’t know. It’s probably my Irish imagination.”

Rae smiled affectionately. “More than likely, you Irish nut. Now come over here,” she said firmly, and Sarah raised her eyebrows as she slowly walked over to her. Rae looked up and put her arms around her waist. “I do love the feel of you.”

Sarah looked down, running her fingers through Rae’s soft blond hair. She then pulled her head back and looked into her blue sparkling eyes.

“Here I thought you loved me for my mind,” she said fondly, then realized what she said. She quickly recovered. “I didn’t mean you loved me. I just meant jokingly.”

Rae agreed hastily. “Oh, I know, I know. I didn’t think you meant love as in love, love.” She stopped, knowing she sounded stupid.

“No, no. I didn’t mean love, in love,” Sarah agreed, then stopped, also realizing the stupidity of the conversation.

They burst into laughter. Then stopped and looked into each other’s eyes.

“Well, now that we know we’re not in love with each other,” Rae said.

Sarah heard the question in her voice and saw the helpless, vulnerable look on her handsome face. She also saw a woman struggling with her past, desperately trying to let it go and finally live. Sex between them came wonderfully easy. However, Sarah knew she was falling in love. It was a struggle for Rae, who Sarah was sure, was used to living on the run, taking the physical pleasures when and where she could. Commander Rae Jefferson took no prisoners.

Sarah smiled at the helpless pose as Rae looked up into her eyes. Sarah roughly tousled her hair and smiled. Cupping her face, she kissed her tenderly.

“Take me to bed, Commander,” she said in a lilting seductive voice that sent shivers down to Rae’s toes.

Rae stood, not losing eye contact. Sarah gave her a skeptical glance. “Don’t you dare try to pick me up.”

Rae laughed heartily and dragged the laughing woman all the way down the hallway.

Chapter 19

Delia absently guided the shopping cart through the produce section of the neighborhood grocery store. She picked up a couple of tomatoes, some carrots, and lettuce and tossed them into the basket next to the bottle of wine. All at once, she got a pang of loneliness. “I’m tired of cooking for myself,” she grumbled as she guided the wobbly cart down the aisle.

She thought of Rae and Sarah and smiled affectionately. If anyone deserved to be happy, it was Rae Jefferson. Sarah was just the thing she needed and at the right time. Rae was sliding into a dark abyss with no way of getting out. As she strolled down the aisles, Delia heard a familiar voice and looked up.

It was Jane Whiting and that Rodriguez woman. Jane stood there, almost cornered, as Pam argued with her. Yikes, Delia thought. As she tried to make an about-face, she heard Jane exclaim loudly.

“Will you stop this? You’re driving me crazy. I was not flirting with the stock boy. My God, Pam. Do you hear how ridiculous that sounds?”

This had all the markings of a good old-fashioned marital spat. Delia had seen enough of them. She then noticed the stock boy in question make a beeline for the manager. Delia sighed and figured she’d step in before they were both completely embarrassed.

She left her cart and walked up to them. “Well, good evening. A little late shopping? Me too. I just got off work and realized I had nothing in the house.” She smiled as Pam shot an angry look at her. Jane let out a sigh that Delia could only describe as relief.

“Detective Grainger,” she exclaimed, completely embarrassed.

“Miss Whiting.” Delia smiled and looked at Pam. “Miss Rodriguez.”

Pam nodded, still furious. “Detective.”

The conversation sounded like something out of Dragnet, Delia thought.

With that, the manager walked over and stood nearby. Delia turned to him, and he sighed gratefully when he recognized her.

“Hey, Bob,” she said and winked.

He smiled and nodded, hoping she had it under control. “Detective Grainger, how are you? You just get off duty?” he asked affably and glanced at Pam, who was still doing a slow burn. Jane was mortified and hung her head, hiding her eyes.

“Yeah, protecting the community is a tough job.” She sighed dramatically.

Bob chuckled, and Jane shot her a curious look. Then for some reason, she burst into laughter. All three of them looked at her.

Bob looked as though he wanted to run. Pam still glared.

Delia could do nothing but laugh along. “What? I do protect the community.” She chuckled, and Jane laughed even harder.

Bob patted Delia on the shoulder. “And the community is grateful,” he said with relief and walked away.

“Does that mean my groceries are free?” she called after him, and Jane tried to stop laughing but couldn’t. “I guess not.”

“All right, stop it, for chrissakes,” Pam whispered to Jane. “Let’s go. It was nice seeing you,” she said to Delia, who nodded and watched Jane.

She hoped Jane was just crazy enough to think she had a great sense of humor—no luck. It had been her experience that when someone laughed so hard at seemingly nothing, crying came next.

The crying started.

Jane covered her face with her hands and wept quietly. Instinctively, Delia knew she didn’t want to make a scene and ached to sob openly. Inexplicably, she wanted to go to her and put her arms around her.

Pam groaned. “Jane, please,” she said helplessly and looked around.

Delia really didn’t like this woman. She wasn’t concerned before when berating her partner in a store. But now, she was worried about making a scene.

“Look, why don’t you both go outside? I’ll get your groceries,” Delia offered.

Pam made a move to Jane, who shrugged her off and walked away. “Leave me alone,” she cried as she passed both of them.

Pam, red-faced, stood there while Delia tried not to show any signs of disgust. You deserved that one, my friend, she thought sadly. Pam fumbled an apology and walked away, leaving the cart behind.

Delia shook her head as she saw them out the store window. Pam pleaded her case as Jane wiped her cheeks. She stood bravely up to her and said something, then walked away. Pam made a move to her and shouted something, muffled by the glass windows. Pam turned in the other direction and walked away.

“Ah, true love.” Delia sighed and looked in their basket. She picked up some imported cheese and gave it a look. “Hmm,” she grunted and tossed it into her own cart.

As she opened the trunk of her car, she heard a voice behind her. She whirled around to see Jane Whiting standing there, hugging herself and shivering. “Geezus, don’t do that! Never sneak up on someone. Are you insane?”

Jane winced apologetically, still shivering.

“Where’s your other half?”

“She went home, I hope. I... Could you do me a huge favor? I hate to ask you, but I left my purse in her car. Would you mind just dropping me off at her place? I’ll call a cab from there.”

Delia raised an eyebrow. “You don’t live together?”

Jane snorted sarcastically as she sniffed. Delia rummaged through her pockets and handed her a handkerchief. Gratefully, Jane accepted it and blew her nose. Delia winced as Jane handed it back to her.

“You keep it. I insist,” she said as if Jane handed her a tarantula.

“No, to answer your question. We do not live together. I stay with her when I don’t have classes. I live in Evanston, off campus.” She rubbed her forehead.

Delia watched her sadly. “This has been quite a week for you, hasn’t it?” 

Jane looked at her, touched by her sincerity. She took a deep, quivering breath and nodded.

Delia could see the waterworks starting again and got her into her car. “Okay, let’s get your purse.”

They drove in relative silence as Jane looked around her car. “Is this a patrol car, Sergeant?”

Delia chuckled. “No, it’s mine. I’m a detective, not a patrolman. Actually, I’m not a sergeant. Someday, though,” she said hopefully as she drove.

Jane stole a glance at her. She was very nice and very attractive. Delia was a couple of inches taller than she was, and Jane noticed her smile from the first time they met. It engulfed her face and seemed to come from her soul.

“You’re in the navy, as well?” She put her head back. “Turn right.”

Delia nodded, watching the road as she drove. “Yep, the Reserves. I stayed in. Rae retired.”

“Do you agree with Rae? That Amy was murdered?” She almost couldn’t get the word out. Delia glanced at her and nodded.

“I’m not sure, Miss Whiting. But when Rae gets her mind set, it’s hard to argue with her.”

“And she’s usually right?”

“Yeah. I have to agree, though. There’s too much going on, but the police have determined it was an accident. So Rae will have to do this on her own. She’s used to that.”

Jane watched her for a moment. “I think you can call me Jane if you’d like. You admire Rae, don’t you?” she asked, looking at her.

Delia, watching the road, grinned and nodded. “She’s the best. If you’re ever in a jam, she’s your girl.”

Jane looked down at her hands, playing with the handkerchief. “Oh, I don’t know. You seemed to be in the right place at the right time tonight.”

For an instant, Delia shivered at the softness of her voice.

“It’s right here,” Jane said.

Delia pulled in front of a brick bungalow and put the car in park.

“Thanks again,” Jane said.

Delia reached over and took her arm. “I’ll wait for you and take you home.”

Jane smiled and patted her hand. “No, thanks. I’ll get a cab. I don’t want any more fighting. I’ll…”

“I’ll wait for you and take you home,” Delia repeated.

Jane let out a sigh of resignation. “Are all ‘someday detective sergeants’ this stubborn?”

“Only the good-looking ones,” Delia said; she frowned when Jane laughed out loud. “It wasn’t that funny.”

Jane got out of the car and closed the door. She bent down, and Delia opened the window. “Thanks, but I’m taking a cab. I can be stubborn, too.” She smiled and walked away, leaving Delia watching her with a worried glance.

She pulled away and parked farther down the street and looked at her watch. “Okay, a cab should be here in fifteen minutes, tops. If she’s a smart girl, she’ll leave. If she doesn’t, she’s a dope.”

She sat there, and in nine minutes, a Yellow Cab pulled up and honked. Jane came running out and got in. Delia smiled happily and drove home.

Detective Delia Grainger was extremely happy that Miss Jane Whiting of Evanston was not a dope.

Chapter 20

Rae woke in the middle of the night, bolting up and screaming. Sarah woke and looked around. She was not used to sleeping with someone who scared the life out of her.

“Rae, sweetie. It’s okay.” Sarah sat up and put her hand on Rae’s arm. She was shocked to see Rae in a pool of sweat.

“Damn it.” She ran her fingers through her hair. “When will it stop?” she exclaimed angrily. She then sat on the edge of the bed, and Sarah crawled up behind her and put her arms around her.

“Lay back. It’s only a dream,” Sarah said.

Lulled by her voice yet again, Rae allowed Sarah to pull her back in her arms. She took her position and laid her head on Sarah’s breast, listening to her heartbeat.

“Sorry I woke you.” She sighed tiredly.

“Woke me? You scared the shit out of me,” Sarah admonished softly. “See what you’ve done to me? Now I’m swearing.” She kissed her head and rocked her.

“You can’t catch anything good from me. Don’t change. Don’t be like me, ever.”

“You’re a good woman. I’m not in the habit of associating with rabble.”

Rae held her close. She took a deep, quivering breath and whispered, “Some days, I feel so lost.”

Sarah kissed the top of her head. “Someday, I’ll find you.”

Rae cuddled close. “Sarah?”

“Hmm?”

“I think I’m falling for you.” She kissed the top of her breast. Sarah let out a small gasp and smiled. Then with such quickness, Rae loomed over her, smiling in the darkness. She kissed Sarah deeply, once again amazed at the feeling that engulfed her.

Rae pulled away and sensed Sarah starting to say something. She quickly kissed her again, leaving her breathless. “Don’t say anything. Just let me make love to you.”

Sarah sighed. Who was she to argue?

*******

Early in the morning, Rae woke and dressed quickly. She watched the slumbering Sarah as she lay on her stomach, the blankets dangerously exposing her thigh. Rae shook her head as she smiled. How lucky could she possibly get? Then a wave of panic wafted over her. What if she realizes what a nutcase I am and leaves? The thought was not foreign to Rae. It was quite possible that it would wind up that way.

Smiling sadly, Rae knelt on the bed and kissed her shoulder. Sarah moaned and opened one eye.

“Hey...What are you doing?” she mumbled.

Rae kissed her shoulder again. “I’m going to check out Amy’s apartment.”

Sarah tried to rise, but Rae put an arm on her shoulder. “Sleep in. I’ll be back for breakfast.”

“Breakfast? What time is it?” She looked at the clock. “Rae, Rae. It’s only five thirty.” She moaned and looked at her. “Can’t you sleep?”

Rae just looked down at her worried face. “What a woman.” She sighed and kissed her cheek. “I’ll be back in a couple of hours. You have the coffee ready.”

“Yes, dear,” she mumbled sarcastically.

Rae playfully slapped her rump, and Sarah let out a tiny screech and hugged the pillow.

*******

The apartment was the same as they first found it. Overturned chairs, papers strewn about. Rae gingerly looked around, trying to gauge the mess as she closed the door. This was no robbery. Nothing of importance had been taken. Expensive stereo equipment was still intact. A huge TV stood untouched.

Then Rae looked around again and noticed the furniture. The couch and recliner leather, not vinyl. She walked into the kitchen. There was an enormous wine rack in the far corner. Rae picked up a bottle. Her eyes widened as she whistled softly. “Rothschild.” Eight or ten bottles of different kinds of wine. One, a bottle of Bordeaux, from 1974.

She put it back in the rack and looked around. There on the sink was a matchbox. Rae picked it up and turned it over. On the cover was a large snake and under it the words The Snake Pit. Rae looked at it curiously. Then it struck her. The Snake Pit was a gay bar on Halsted Avenue.

She walked into it once, and that was enough. It was a seedy bar. Gay and straight men and women frequented it for sex and drugs in the lower level of the bar. She opened the matchbox to see a number written inside. She picked up Amy’s phone and dialed the number.

After a ring or two, a voice came over the phone. “What?” a male voice barked. Rae held her breath for an instant, and before she could speak, the man barked again. “How did you get this number? Who the fuck is this?”

Rae hung up and put the phone down. For some bizarre reason, she was scared. Rae Jefferson rarely got scared. She nervously looked around the kitchen and walked down the hall into the bathroom, then she went to Amy’s bedroom. She looked around and noticed the sheets on her bed were pure silk. She sat on the edge of the bed and looked on her nightstand. Nothing out of the ordinary, she thought, then opened the drawer. She raised an eyebrow as she noticed all sorts of sex toys in various vivid colors. She picked up a harness with appropriate accoutrement attached.

Rae shook her head. “Doesn’t anyone have sex the old-fashioned way anymore?” Sarah should see this, she thought. She gave the harness one more look.

She then looked in the closet and found what she thought were expensive shoes and boots. The closet floor was filled with them.

“How many pairs of shoes does one woman need?” She scratched her head, then closed the closet door.

As she stood there, the hair on the back of her neck stood on end, and she shivered violently. She stood frozen, trying not to breathe and listened. Did she hear something in the hallway? Swallowing with difficulty, she crept to the bedroom door.

She looked out into the hallway and saw nothing as she retraced her steps from the bathroom, to the kitchen, then back into the living room.

The hair on the back of her neck bristled as she looked at the front door. She knew she closed it. It was now wide open.

*******

Sarah just stepped out of the shower when she heard the phone ring. Forgetting she wasn’t at home, she picked up the phone. The voice on the other end shocked her.

“Rae Jefferson?” the male voice asked.

“No, can I take a message?” Sarah pulled the towel around her.

“Yeah, tell her to back off. It was an accident, hear me? I saw her snooping. We had nothing to do with that woman’s death. Hear me? You tell her that.”

Sarah stood there and nodded. Then shook herself, “Y-yes, I hear you. I’ll tell her, but wouldn’t you like to leave a name and number?” she asked nicely.

The man laughed. “Nice try. You tell her.”

Sarah sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the phone. With that, she heard the front door open and was petrified. Someone was walking down the hall. She sat there, clutching the towel around her, wanting to scream.

It was Rae. She let out a sigh of relief and put a shaky hand to her forehead.

“What in the world are you doing?” Rae asked, smiling. She rushed over to her and knelt as she saw the pallor of Sarah’s complexion. “Sarah, what happened?”

Sarah explained in a trembling voice. Rae picked up the phone and dialed to recall the number. It was untraceable.

“Shit.” She sat next to Sarah and put an arm around her. “You okay?”

Sarah stopped shivering and only nodded. “Who do you think it was?” she asked, holding on to her arm.

“I have no idea. But he said ‘we,’ right? Makes me think of Mike, Molly, and that Jerry Truman guy. I don’t know who else it could be,” she said logically. She gave Sarah a healthy hug and kissed her wet head. “I’m sorry. You must have been petrified.”

Sarah laughed. “It’s never a dull moment with you. Did you find anything out at Amy’s?”

Rae lay back against the pillows and explained as Sarah dressed. She poked her head out of the bathroom. “You think someone was in the apartment with you?”

Rae nodded gravely and told her about the matchbook. Sarah came out of the bathroom, brushing her hair. “The Snake Pit? What a den of iniquity.”

“And just how do you know of this place?” Rae asked with a smug grin.

Sarah laughed as she walked over to her and sat on the bed. “Hey, I had a life before you,” she said defensively, then saw the skeptical look on Rae’s face. “Oh, all right. I’ve never been in the place. I’ve only heard about it.”

Rae tried to hide her smile. Somehow, she couldn’t get a good mental picture of Professor Sarah Connelly, head of the English Literature Department of Northwestern University, in a seedy bar like The Snake Pit.

“Are you going to go there?” Sarah asked eagerly and completely intrigued.

Rae chuckled. “Maybe, but to answer that maniacal look in your eyes, no, you can’t come with.” She put her hands behind her head, closing her eyes.

“No,” she repeated as Sarah playfully unbuttoned her shirt. Rae laughed. “Stop it. You’ll be late for your class. You’ll have to start giving Professor Nelson your paycheck.”

Sarah said nothing as she lightly pushed open her shirt. “Why, Commander Jefferson, you forgot your undergarments.”

“It’s no use,” Rae said breathlessly. “You’re not going.” She sighed. “You’re not.”

“I only have a few classes through midday.”

“But I have clients…”

“Shh. This won’t take long. Then you’ll be on your way.”

Rae moaned quietly and gave up, realizing she’d probably never have control with this woman.

Chapter 21

Sarah sat in her office, rocking gently, gazing out the window and thinking of her morning with Rae. She didn’t even hear Betty knock as she came in.

“Well, you’re back. Yes, there’s a definite glow about you,” she said and sat. Sarah whirled her chair around, grinning. Betty laughed affectionately. “So I take it the evening and morning went well?”

“Wonderfully so, Betty.” Sarah sighed and laughed along.

Betty raised an eyebrow. “Is it sex or is it love?” 

Sarah smiled, she loved Betty. She’d been like a mother to her these four years.

“I don’t know yet. Rae Jefferson’s experienced and knows how to please a woman, that’s for sure. I don’t know the romantic side of her, if she has one. It’s been a long haul for her...” The soft knock at her door interrupted her.

It was a young man with flowers. Betty raised her eyebrows, and Sarah blushed horribly and covered her eyes. No one ever sent her flowers.

“Professor Connelly?” He set them on her desk and walked out. Sarah stood there, staring at them.

“Well?” Betty lightly rapped the desk with her cane.

“Was I supposed to tip him?”

Betty rolled her eyes and again tapped her cane on the desk. Sarah took a deep breath and opened them. It was a beautiful bouquet of yellow jonquils. She gave them a curious look. She didn’t know why she thought for sure they’d be roses. Betty gave a skeptical grunt.

Sarah took the card and read it, then laughed and held it to her chest. She handed the card to Betty, who read it out loud.

As I quietly thank the gods above, these will have to do until the spring... In the spring, you will have daffodils...10,000 daffodils.

Rae

“Quoting from Wordsworth, no less.” Betty smiled and put the card in the flowers. “Well, that should answer your question of her romantic side.” She smiled and walked out, leaving Sarah gazing at the flowers.

For the remainder of the morning, Sarah knew she would have a hard time concentrating on her schoolwork.

*******

Later that afternoon, Sarah stood by her window and grinned when she noticed Rae walking through the campus. She watched Rae’s graceful, confident figure make her way toward her building. Sarah pulled open her window, and totally out of character, she whistled like a sailor on leave.

Heads looked up, and so did Rae. She shielded her eyes from the Indian summer sun and grinned wildly as she waved.

“Good afternoon, Professor,” she called up.

The students watched as they walked by. Sarah figured all of them wondered just what in the world was happening to Professor Connelly.

Sarah took one jonquil and held it out the window. Rae laughed heartily and nodded, motioning that she’d come up.

Rae walked faster as she took the stairs two at a time.  As she rounded the corner, she nearly ran into Betty, who was coming out of the teachers’ lounge. “Good afternoon, Betty.”

“Good day. Sarah is waiting for you, I’m sure. I thank God she has no more classes today.”

“Me too.” Rae laughed.

Sarah opened her door just as Rae breathlessly came bounding up the last stairs and stood in front of her.

“Whew! You need an elevator, I’m not getting any younger and…”

Sarah pulled her into her office and shut the door. She then turned to Rae and pulled her into her arms, kissing her passionately.

Rae sighed and returned her kiss, putting her arms around her waist, holding her so close she could hear her rapid heartbeat. Passion took over as she eagerly unbuttoned the top of Sarah’s silk blouse.

“Rae, we can’t,” she exclaimed halfheartedly.

Rae pulled back and gave her an unwavering look of pure unadulterated lust.

Sarah melted on the spot and quickly locked the door. “Now we can.” She sighed helplessly.

Rae grinned and pulled her back into her arms.

They jumped moments later when someone knocked at the door.

“Ignore it,” Rae said in a rough voice.

“I can’t. They know I’m in here.” Sarah regretfully pulled away and straightened her blouse. “How in the hell did you unbutton this so quickly? You octopus.” She hastily buttoned the blouse and ran her fingers through her hair.

She opened the door to find the dean standing there. “George, what is it?” she asked, blocking his entrance to her office.

“Just a reminder about the department meeting in a few days.”

“Oh, fine. Just email me. I’m on an—” She felt Rae’s hand on her ass and jumped.

“Are you all right?” George asked.

Sarah rubbed her hip. “Touch of rheumatism. Email me, please. Thanks, George.” She quickly closed the door and whirled around to see Rae grinning childishly. “You ass. That was the dean of…”

Rae pulled her once again into her arms. “I don’t care. I can’t seem to get enough of you.”

They looked into each other’s eyes and jumped as the phone rang.

Sarah took a deep breath, smoothed her hair, and answered it. Rae smiled and watched her. She was completely flushed, her neck red and blotchy as she fanned herself with a paper as she talked. Rae sniffed the flowers and winked at her.

“I’ll be back. Where’s Molly Eastman?” she whispered.

Sarah juggled the phone on her shoulder and scribbled the room number on a piece of paper. Rae picked it up, walked around the desk, and pushed the back of her chair. Sarah was still on the phone, trying to sound professional as Rae bent her chair backward. Rae then smiled and kissed her tenderly as her hand lightly palmed her breast.

Sarah sighed and dropped the phone. She scrambled for it as Rae chuckled and walked out of her office.

*******

Rae walked to room 232 and waited in the hallway. In a moment or two, the class was dismissed, and Rae looked for and spotted Molly Eastman.

“Excuse me, Miss Eastman?” Rae asked, and Molly stopped and looked.

“Yes?” she asked nicely. When Rae introduced herself, Molly stopped smiling. “What can I do for you?”

“Well, I’m hoping to shed some light on Amy Davis’s death,” Rae said.

“I thought it was an accident.”

Rae thought she was honestly befuddled. “There are just a few things I find odd. Do you know why someone would break into her apartment?”

“No. I don’t. Really, I only knew Amy from class.”

“What about Mike Porter or Jerry Truman? How well did they know her?”

“I have no idea. Now if you’ll excuse me.” She started to walk away.

Rae gently but firmly held her arm. “Well, how about Mark? Where can I reach him?”

Molly froze for a split second. To anyone else, it would have gone unnoticed. To Rae, it was like a beacon. She watched her and said nothing.

“I don’t know who you’re talking about, Miss Jefferson.” She tried to sound firm and confident. It was a slight glistening of perspiration that broke out on her upper that belied her voice.

“I will find out, Molly. Amy was murdered,” she assured her.

Molly pulled free. “If she was, then I sincerely hope you do.” She turned in a huff and was lost in the crowd of students.

Rae walked away and headed back to Sarah. Then for just a moment, she turned back and followed Molly. She wove her way in and out of the humanity and saw her up ahead.

And as she suspected, Mike Porter was there waiting for her at the door. She saw the two of them exchange comments. Mike looked around, took her by the arm, and guided her down the steps and to their car.

“What the hell is up with you two?” Rae asked impatiently as she walked away.

She was determined to find out.

Chapter 22

Sarah’s last class was just letting out as Rae stood by the classroom. Sarah was sitting behind the desk, smiling. She chuckled, took off her glasses, and shook her head. Rae knew what she was thinking; Rae was thinking the same thing.

“What are you thinking?” she asked as she walked into the room.

Sarah jumped and put a hand to her chest. “You stay right there,” she warned, and Rae stopped.

Rae smiled sheepishly and put her hands behind her back. “All done for the day?”

Sarah narrowed her eyes at her. “Yes, and we have a wake to go to,” she reminded her, completely ruining the mood, by the deflated look on Rae’s face. She filed her papers in her leather briefcase and skirted by Rae.

“Keep your hands to yourself,” she mumbled as she passed.

“Yes, Professor.”

As they drove to the funeral home, Rae told Sarah about Molly Eastman. “I know there’s something going on. I can feel it.” Rae lightly tapped the steering wheel.

Sarah stole a glance at her and put a hand on her arm. “Rae, relax. You can’t do anything tonight,” Sarah assured her as they pulled into the parking lot.

“I hate these things. They’re so barbaric,” Rae grumbled as they approached the building. “I need a drink of water or something.”

Sarah handed her a stick of gum. “Here, you big baby.”

*******

As suspected, the mood was subdued. Rae and Sarah looked around and saw Jane standing with who Rae assumed were Amy’s parents. Pam stood in the back with a few women.

Sarah made her way up to Jane, and Rae followed. God, she hated these things. Then the vision of John Higgins’s family flashed through her mind. All of the sudden, she began to perspire, and Sarah looked back at her and noticed her pained expression.

“Are you all right?” she asked quietly. Rae nodded, and Sarah handed her a handkerchief. She gratefully took it and wiped her brow.

“Are you getting sick?”

“No, I’m fine.” Rae pushed her through the small crowd of people.

Jane looked up and smiled. “Professor Connelly, Rae. This is Mr. and Mrs. Davis.” She made the introductions, and they all shook hands.

She looked at Rae. “Were you able to tell Detective Grainger?”

Rae smiled slightly. “I think she’ll come, don’t worry.” 

“I truly am sorry,” Sarah was saying sincerely, and both parents nodded. “I was one of Amy’s professors. She was a bright student. This is very tragic.”

Mr. Davis, tall and thin, looked to be about fifty-five. Mrs. Davis was a bit shorter but in extremely good shape. Her gray hair accentuated her watery blue eyes. She smiled sadly now and took Sarah’s hand, holding it tight. She instantly looked more at ease, holding her hand. “Thank you. I still can’t believe she’s gone.”

Rae once again marveled at Sarah’s ability to rise to any occasion. She smiled and put her hand on the back of her neck, giving her an affectionate squeeze. Mrs. Davis then looked at Rae.

“How did you know my daughter?” she asked, and Rae froze for a moment.

Jane’s eyes widened, grateful Pam was not in earshot of the conversation.

Rae recovered quickly. “I only met her a week ago, Mrs. Davis, through Jane and Pam. I can’t tell you how truly sorry I am. I think I may have been one of the last people to see her. She was full of life. I’m sorry.” She fought back the tears; Sarah noticed her hands trembling slightly. Mr. Davis nodded, then Jane led them away.

“Let’s sit for a second,” Sarah suggested, noticing the beads of perspiration forming on Rae’s brow.

As they made their way to the back, Delia walked in. She took off her sunglasses and looked around. She spotted Rae and waved slightly. She walked up to them and kissed them both.

“I hate these things,” she grumbled, and Rae nodded emphatically.

Sarah rolled her eyes. “Will you two stop it?” 

“My mouth is dry,” Delia grumbled.

Rae gave Sarah a smirk. “Mom has gum.” The moment it came out of her mouth, she wanted it back. She felt Sarah’s glare and avoided it completely.

Delia’s eyes widened in horror, but she said nothing as she took the stick of gum from Sarah, who said nothing.

“Thanks.” She smiled sheepishly.

“Jane’s been asking about you, go pay your respects,” Sarah said.

Delia walked away. As she passed Rae, she whispered, “Nice going.”

Rae glanced at Sarah, who had a touch of sadness in her eyes. Rae felt like a heel as she cleared her throat.

“Sarah,” she started, and Sarah laid a hand on her shoulder.

“Forget it. I understand. Let’s sit.”

Rae couldn’t help but hear the trace of resignation in her voice.

They sat in the back, watching the small crowd of people paying their respects. Then Rae noticed a tall young man making his way to the front. He had blond, almost white hair, cut short but spiked on the top. He sported an earring in both ears and had his lower lip pierced. He wore baggy blue jeans with a hole in each knee and steel-toed work boots.

Sarah watched him, as well, and leaned into Rae. “Good grief, you’d think he’d at least wear a decent pair of jeans,” she whispered as Rae watched him. She was grateful Sarah was talking to her again.

The young man glanced her way, then looked away. “It’s a wake, for heaven’s sake. He looks like a…” She stopped and looked at Rae. She was frowning as she watched the tall blond stand by the casket. “What are you staring at?” 

Rae wasn’t paying attention to her. She just watched him with intense curiosity. Sarah watched, as well, knowing Rae was not going to answer her.

The young man cocked his head, then reached over and touched Amy’s hand. He smiled, turned around, and hastily made his way through the crowd.

“I’ll be right back,” Rae said and followed him.

Sarah reached for her. “Wait,” she hissed, then sat back.

Delia walked up to her and sat. “Where’s she going? And who’s the blond?”

“I have no idea. Is she always like this?” she asked seriously.

Delia chuckled and put an arm around her. “Yes, that’s the old Rae. Once she gets something in that head of hers, she’s oblivious to everything else. You’ve got your hands full.”

*******

Outside, Rae caught up with the tall blond. There was something familiar about him.

“Excuse me,” she called, and he turned around. He then realized who she was. He stopped and put his hands in his pockets.

“I’m sorry...” she started and introduced herself. She held out her hand, and he hesitated before he took it.

“Mark Rhodes,” he grumbled and let go of her hand. Rae didn’t bat an eye as she recalled the name.

“It’s a terrible tragedy, this accident,” Rae said softly as she watched him.

He frowned as he looked around the street. “Yeah” was all he said. His voice wavered a bit.

“How well did you know Amy?” she asked affably and leaned against the building.

He put a foot up on a bumper of a car and sighed heavily. He then looked at her. “How well did you know her?”

She knew then that he was aware of who she was. She gave him a half smile. “Not near as well as I would have liked.”

He softened a bit and only nodded. “I’ve known her for a couple years. We both go to Northwestern. I noticed Professor Connelly, she’s a good woman. Amy liked her.”

He then looked Rae in the eye. Rae raised an eyebrow as he looked like he was going to say something profound. She waited, then he looked away.

“Well,” he started, and Rae interrupted him.

“What do you think Amy was doing by the Chicago River? The police said her blood alcohol content was high. They also thought drugs might have been in her system, as well. Did you see her at all that week?”

He glared at her then, taking his foot off the bumper. He was a bit taller than Rae but not much heavier. Rae looked at him and didn’t move.

“I don’t know what she was doing there. And no, the last time I saw her was a few days before. I-I went out of town and got back the other day. So if you want to go running to the police, go ahead. I’ve got an alibi.”

Rae gave him a curious look. “The police have determined it to be an accident.”

He searched her face as if trying to figure her out. “And you agree, right?”

“Shouldn’t I?”

“Look, are you a cop or private investigator?”

Rae sighed and shook her head. Again with the PI... “No, Mark, I’m neither. I just want to find out what the hell happened.”

He ran a tired hand over his face and took a deep breath. “I don’t know. Look, Amy didn’t do drugs ever. She got mixed up,” he started, then stopped. Rae watched him in silence.

“I gotta go,” he said quickly, then looked at her. “If you’re trying to find out something, you’d better be careful, that’s all I’m saying. You don’t know.” He stopped and ran his fingers through his hair. “I gotta go.”

Rae grabbed his arm as he turned to leave. She took out her business card and handed it to him. He hesitated for a moment, then took it.

“Anytime, Mark... For any reason.” She touched his arm. She noticed for an instant that his lower lip quivered. Their eyes met, and he blinked once or twice. He straightened and put the card in his breast pocket.

“Okay. I’ll see ya.” He walked down the street and vanished in the early evening crowd.

Rae stood there watching him as he faded out of sight. She then turned and walked back into the funeral parlor and found Sarah and Delia talking to Jane. Rae noticed Pam was nowhere in sight.

Delia was chuckling as she was telling some story. Jane and Sarah tried to stifle their laughs as Rae grinned. Delia was holding court. Two good-looking women were intently listening to her inane rambling, and Delia was in her glory.

They all looked up when Rae walked up to them. “Rae. Just in time. I was telling them about Seaman Doyle.”

Rae’s eyes widened, and she laughed quietly. “Geezus, Delia. At a wake?”

Jane looked completely embarrassed as she put a hand over her mouth. Sarah was wiping her eyes, trying not to laugh out loud. Jane put a hand on Delia’s arm, pleading for her to stop. Delia chuckled and agreed.

“Sorry, Miss Whiting, but Doyle was an odd young woman,” she said seriously. Sarah stifled a laugh, and Jane hung on to Delia’s arm. Rae hung her head and sighed.

“All right, Detective.”

“Sorry, Rae,” she said as her lips quivered. Soon they were trying desperately not to laugh out loud. It was as if they were in church.

“Well, what’s so funny?” Pam’s voice rang out.

All four of them jumped and turned in her direction. For a nanosecond, everyone was silent.

“Nothing.” Rae tried her best to be adult and mature. Sarah bit her bottom lip and nodded. Jane was immediately sobered, a deflated look flashed across her face. Rae noticed it; she was sure all of them did.

Pam gave Jane a particularly unflattering look that Delia took exception to but said nothing.

“Amy’s parents are looking for you,” Pam said to Jane, who excused herself and walked away.

An awkward silence hung among the three of them. Sarah coughed gently. “Well, it appears Amy had a few friends,” she said, looking around the room.

“Yes, she did. Excuse me,” Pam said bluntly and walked away.

Delia watched her make her way up to Jane. “I don’t like her,” she said. Rae stifled a grin and glanced at Sarah.

“She does seem a bit rude,” Sarah agreed.

Delia then turned to Rae. “So who was the guy you followed out of here?”

“Mark Rhodes,” Rae said, and Sarah’s eyes widened.

“The one who Molly mentioned?”

“Yep. He knows something. He got nervous talking about Amy. He was looking around the street as if waiting for someone to appear,” Rae said thoughtfully. She absently rubbed her eyebrow as her mind wandered back to Amy’s apartment. So many expensive items that just didn’t seem to fit the typical undergrad’s economic plight.

“Okay, I’m beginning to understand your looks, Rae. What are you thinking?” Sarah asked, intrigued. Rae smiled slightly.

“So you think you know me?” she asked with a smug grin.

“Yes, I do,” Sarah said confidently. “You rubbed your eyebrow and you stared off into space.” Rae frowned and blushed horribly. “I’ll bet it’s been a while since you’ve blushed, too.”

Now Rae abruptly stopped and cleared her throat. “Okay, you’ve made your point.” She then told them what she was thinking. She took the matchbox out of her pocket and showed it to Delia.

Delia looked and opened it. “It was on the kitchen counter?”

Rae nodded as she watched her. “In plain view...”

Sarah watched both of them; she didn’t have a clue what they were getting at.

“So how come…” Delia started to say.

“I have no idea. That’s my question, as well.” Rae took the matchbox from her. Sarah was completely confused now.

“Okay, you two are talking in some kind of navy code. What the heck is going on?” she asked helplessly.

“Sorry. The point I’m making is this: I found that matchbox in plain view on the kitchen counter. Why didn’t McGrath see it and take it, as well? Or at least mention it?”

Sarah’s eyes widened as she started to understand. “So you think someone put it there?”

Delia shrugged. “Maybe he did see it and didn’t think anything of it. He may not know what kind of bar it is.”

“My gut says no, Delia. I don’t think he saw it because I don’t think it was there when he searched Amy’s apartment. I think I need to check this place out. How about you take Sarah home and…?”

“How about I’m a grown woman and I don’t need anyone taking me home?” Sarah said emphatically, standing her ground.

“Sarah, I need to check this out. Now, please, let Delia…” Rae noticed the look of resolution.

Long ago and far away, in her previous life, when Commander Rae Jefferson spoke in such a tone, people listened and obeyed. Now in her new life, things were going to be a bit different. Sarah Connelly stood there with her hands on her hips in a defiant pose. Rae narrowed her eyes in confusion. Delia just watched.

“I know that look. Don’t ask to go with me,” Rae said logically and tried the ole schmooze. “Honey, really, I don’t want you involved in this.”

“You big egomaniac. You involved me in this. You came to me and now you… Fine. If you need to be the lone wolf, you go right ahead. We’re not attached at the hip, and you don’t owe me anything,” she said with equal logic.

Rae frowned now and leaned back, completely confounded. She gave Sarah a skeptical glance. “If something were to happen, I’d feel better if you weren’t there.” Why did she feel guilty?

“I understand. Delia can take me home. You do what you have to and call me.” She smiled, then kissed her cheek. “I’m going to say good night to Jane. Be careful.” She touched her cheek and walked away.

Rae and Delia stood there watching her. “So she’s just gonna let me go with no arguing?” Rae asked.

Delia rolled her eyes. “Boy, you want everything, don’t you? You want her to care, but you don’t want to include her, so she has no choice but to worry.”

“I don’t want her to worry. Damn it,” Rae cursed and ran her fingers through her hair. “This is why I’m better off alone.”

Delia shrugged. “Well, keep it up and you’ll get your wish.” She slapped her back. “I’ll take Sarah home. You check out The Snake Pit. Just remember, somebody knows you’re snooping. They have the advantage.”

“I know. I won’t be long,” she assured her, then walked out.

*******

Up front, Sarah was watching Rae’s retreat. She quickly said her goodbyes and headed toward the back. She grabbed Delia’s arm and pulled her toward the door.

“Hurry, I don’t want to lose her,” Sarah urged, and Delia stopped abruptly. Sarah pulled at her arm; Delia was immovable.

“Christ, are all you navy women this strong? C’mon.”

“Sarah, what in the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“I’m following Rae. Now are you coming with me or do I go alone?”

“No, no, no.” Delia shook her head furiously.

Sarah let go of her arm. “Okay. I’ll go in there alone. When something happens to me, you explain to Rae how you let me go...all alone.”

“You are an evil woman,” she said slowly and followed the laughing Sarah out the door.

As they approached Delia’s car, her beeper went off. “Shit.” She called the precinct. After listening for a moment, she said, “Be right down,” and looked at Sarah.

“I’m taking you home. I’ve got to get back to the precinct,” she said unwavering and ushered Sarah to her car.

Sarah pouted all the way home. Delia chuckled as she glanced at her. “You shouldn’t go into a place like that anyway. Rae would have killed both of us.”

“Oh, I’m not afraid of her.”

“That’s because you have no sense. I, on the other hand, do. She scares the hell out of me. Good night.” Delia smiled and pulled up to her house.

“Good night, Delia. Thanks for nothing,” Sarah said flatly and heard Delia laugh as she pulled away.

She waited until she got out of sight, then ran down the street and hailed a cab. Rae was definitely not going to be happy to see her.

Chapter 23

Rae parked across the street from The Snake Pit. “What a dive,” she mumbled as she opened the door.

An odd little man stood there with a wad of money in his hand. “Upstairs, down, or both?” he asked as he sized her up and down. Rae knew what that meant. Upstairs was the bar, downstairs was, well, anything goes.

“Both,” she said evenly and handed him the money.

“Have fun.” 

The bar was dark and not too crowded. Of course, it was only nine o’clock. The witching hour wasn’t until at least midnight. She made her way to the bar and sat. A man came over, and she ordered her drink. Looking around, she saw a few couples, mostly men, in intimate conversation. One couple at the bar was quite animated. The bartender walked over to them.

“Take it downstairs, gents,” he quipped, and the two men headed for the stairs. He then turned his attention to Rae.

“I don’t remember seeing you, and I know most of the regulars.” He held out his hand. “Pete.”

Rae shook it but didn’t give her name, to which Pete raised a curious eyebrow but said nothing. It was common for people not to give their names. An alderman waltzed in every now and then with a different man every time.

“I was looking for a friend. I hoped she’d be in here tonight,” Rae said as she took a drink.

“Who’s the girl, maybe I know her?” He shrugged and wiped the bar.

Rae hesitated for a moment. “Amy Davis. I met her a week ago, and I was told she comes here occasionally.”

He stopped wiping the bar, then continued. “Hmm. Don’t know her.”

Rae knew he was lying as he walked away and said nothing more.

The bar filled up, and quickly, it was crowded. Rae glanced around and saw a woman sitting at the end of the bar, watching her. Rae knew the look, and as if on cue, the woman got up and made her way over to Rae.

“May I?” She didn’t wait for an answer. She sat down, much too close to Rae. “Buy me a drink?” she asked coyly.

Rae raised an eyebrow and called Pete over.

“I’ll have another and get…” She stopped and looked at the woman.

“Call me Juanita.”

Rae raised the other eyebrow. Oh, brother. “Juanita whatever she likes,” Rae finished, and Pete walked away.

Rae turned slightly on the barstool. Juanita inched closer. Any closer and she’d be in Rae’s back pocket. “So...Juanita. Is that a stage name?”

She laughed excessively loud. “No. Just my name for the night. Have you been downstairs?”

Rae smiled. This woman was fast. “No, not really.”

“You should try it.” Juanita reached over and placed her hand on Rae’s upper thigh.

Rae glanced at the stairs, looking for someone, something familiar.

Juanita reached up and put her hand on Rae’s cheek and turned her face to her. “Hey, remember me?”

Rae gave her a wink. “Juanita, Juanita,” she said, smiling.

Juanita was in heaven. “Let’s go.” She took Rae’s hand.

“Whoa. Let’s relax for a minute. What’s the rush?” Rae sipped her drink.

“I don’t remember ever seeing you before,” Juanita said as her hand sensually rested on Rae’s thigh.

“Actually, I was looking for a friend. She said she used to frequent this place, so I thought I’d see what the appeal was.” Rae tried to avoid the tingling sensation in her thigh.

“A friend? What’s her name?” Juanita plucked the cherry out of her drink and sensually placed it in her mouth and sucked on it. Rae watched her for a moment, then blinked. She then collected herself.

“Amy Davis,” she said in what she hoped was a steady voice.

“I know that name,” Juanita said, and Rae heard the honesty in her voice. She looked right at Rae. “Young, blond. I remember her now. She had a tattoo on her back, a snake.”

“Right.” Rae hoped this woman would continue.

“Look,” Juanita said and glanced around. “You don’t want to be involved with her and her crowd. I mean, they’re…” She stopped, and Rae leaned forward and took her hand off her thigh and held it.

“They’re what?”

She gave Rae a skeptical look. “Who are you?”

Rae, feeling like she was going to clam up, smiled and took her hand. “Just a friend, nothing more,” she said slowly and caressed her hand. Juanita softened for a moment.

“I think you’re a bit more than that. I think you’re a bit reckless. I like that—reckless.”

She smiled and stood, placing herself between Rae’s legs. She put her arms around her neck and kissed her. Rae tried to pull back, but to no avail. Juanita’s tongue plunged into her mouth, giving Rae a tonsillectomy. She slowly pulled away and erotically sucked on Rae’s bottom lip before releasing her.

“Now. Let’s go downstairs,” Juanita said as her hand wandered up to her breast.

To Rae’s horror, she saw Sarah standing there, gaping. She then turned and made her way through the crowd. Rae saw her as she looked around in confusion, then Sarah noticed the stairs.

“Sarah, no,” Rae called out as Sarah ran downstairs. She knew Sarah thought the stairs were an exit. Rae tried to release herself from Juanita’s tentacles. Finally, she freed herself and apologized. She picked up her money off the bar and looked at Juanita.

“Sorry, gotta go,” she said and scooted off the barstool.

*******

Sarah had already descended the stairs and looked around in the dimly lit room. What in the world is this place? she thought as she slowly walked around. She noticed two men in the corner. One on his knees in front of the other, who was holding his head in place. She was shocked. She looked the other way and saw three men in an intimate entanglement.

“Oh, my good Lord,” she exclaimed and abruptly turned around. She bumped into someone who put her arms around her. She looked up to see Rae’s angry face.

“Do you know what’s going on down here?” she asked stupidly as Rae dragged her to an unoccupied area.

Rae then unceremoniously pushed her against the wall. “Are you crazy?” Rae asked angrily.

“Me? I’m not the one exhibiting lascivious behavior in a public place.” She looked around. “This is a public place, isn’t it?”

Rae hung her head and growled.

“And who was the brain surgeon you were with? Does she have a name?”

“Juanita.” Rae shook her head.

“Honestly?”

“Will you quit joking? What are you doing here and where’s Delia?”

“She was called away. Don’t blame her. She thinks I’m at home.”

“Which is where you’re going.” Rae took her by the arm.

Sarah pulled free. “Hey, quit mauling me. Jailbait is waiting for you upstairs. Or were you planning on joining the party down here?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Sarah,” Rae whispered. She heard someone coming down the stairs. “Damn it. Keep quiet.” Then she kissed Sarah, who let out a muffled yipe.

“What are you doing?” Sarah whispered against her lips.

“Someone’s coming.”

“More than one I’d say…”

“Keep quiet.” Rae pulled Sarah around, so that she now was against the wall and could see the room, her eyes now accustomed to the darkness. They really were having sex in a public place and paid no attention to Rae and Sarah. Rae let Sarah go but held her close.

“Shit,” Rae whispered.

Sarah froze. “What, what?” she whispered into Rae’s shoulder. “I can’t see a thing, and I’m feeling very vulnerable.”

Rae said nothing, thanking the gods above they were in a very dark corner. Then she saw him. The redhead, Jerry Truman.

“Okay, kiss me like you mean it,” Rae said and roughly pulled her head back.

“W-what..?” Sarah’s voice squeaked out.

Rae’s mouth clamped down on hers in a rough, brutal kiss. Sarah exclaimed, almost in pain, as Rae’s fingers entwined in her hair. Her other hand came around her back and firmly grabbed her ass and squeezed.

She looked beyond Sarah to see Jerry Truman narrow his eyes, trying to adjust to the dim lighting. He looked their way and for a second looked like he was going to come over.

Rae then slid her hand under Sarah’s shirt and caressed her back, her hand then returned farther down her body. Sarah was moaning and unfortunately becoming quite aroused as Rae put on a show for the redhead.

He turned away and walked upstairs. Rae quickly let go, and Sarah staggered for an instant. Rae steadied her but watched to make sure he wasn’t coming back.

“Okay, let’s…” Rae whispered quickly.

Sarah’s lips stopped her as she placed a scorching kiss against her lips. Rae moaned deeply as she leaned against the wall. Her heart was pounding in her chest as Sarah’s tongue snaked past her lips. Sarah now moaned into the kiss as she reached down and cupped between Rae’s legs.

“Oh, God, Sarah. Not now,” she begged breathlessly and tried to pull away.

“Shh. Stand perfectly still there, and nobody gets hurt.” Sarah continued to massage Rae as she easily unzipped her jeans. Rae groaned and put her head back against the wall with a small thud. Sarah kissed and nipped at the offered neck as she slipped her hand inside, her fingers immediately engulfed in the warm arousal. She purred. “My goodness.”

Rae growled helplessly as she shook uncontrollably.

Sarah worked her fingers through the wet curls, and Rae cried out as the insistent fingers found their mark. “Sarah, God,” Rae hissed. She felt her legs getting weaker. “I-I can’t stand much more.”

Sarah kissed her passionately as she stroked slowly. “Not yet.” Rae was now panting, trying desperately not to slip to the floor. Her knees buckled several times. Sarah’s caresses were pure evil, bringing Rae right to the edge, then backing away. Rae was perspiring and trembling with her ache to release.

“Please, Sarah,” she found herself begging. She had never done this before. The feeling was so exquisite, she felt like crying.

Sarah pulled Rae down for a deep, loving kiss while she gave Rae what she needed. She swallowed Rae’s cries of ecstasy in the kiss. Rae shook and quivered with each stroke until Sarah slowly stopped and once again cupped her sex. She held her, and Rae instinctively clenched her thighs to capture her hand.

“Shit!” she said breathlessly and slumped against Sarah.

Sarah chuckled and kissed the damp forehead. “God, you feel so good. I love to hold you like this.” She gently massaged once again.

Rae groaned and twitched. “Stop it or I’ll come again. Damn it, woman,” she said in a low raspy voice.

Sarah relented and pulled her hand away. She zipped the jeans as Rae stood there helpless. “You’ve ruined me. I used to have a good deal of staying power. Now one touch, and I’m toast. What have you done to me?”

“I’ve loved you, that’s all,” she said tenderly. “Not the most romantic spot…”

Rae looked into the compassionate eyes. She reached in and caressed the soft cheek.

“Is that all?” She took a deep, quivering breath and shook her head.

“That’s the naughtiest thing I have ever done,” Sarah assured her with a wicked laugh.

“C’mon, let’s get out of here before you have any more ideas.”

As she pulled Sarah through the decadent array of humanity, Sarah smiled inwardly at Rae’s awkward gait. It took Rae a moment to get the strength back in her legs as they headed up the stairs.

Once outside, Rae looked around and guided Sarah to her jeep. As they pulled away from the curb, she glanced at Sarah; the look of pure lust was unmistakable.

“God, don’t look at me that way.” Rae tried to maintain control. She opted for changing the subject. “That woman knew who Amy was. By the way, you don’t really think I was going to do something with her, do you?” She gave Sarah a quick look.

Sarah swallowed with extreme difficulty and fanned herself. “At this moment, I couldn’t care less about Conchita…”

“Juanita…”

“Don’t push it.” Sarah grinned. “Your place or mine? Quick.”

Rae’s eyes widened as she watched the road. Then she laughed nervously at the look on Sarah’s face. “Well, yours is closer.”

*******

They ran up the walk. Sarah fumbled with the key, and Rae took it out of her hand and opened the door. Once in, they were like magnets. Their bodies rammed into each other. They kissed and fumbled with each other’s clothes. Sarah wrenched her mouth free.

“Start a fire,” she said.

“I’m trying to,” Rae countered as she kissed her deeply. Sarah laughed.

“No, you dope, the fireplace. It’ll be roman...” She stopped short when Rae nearly ripped off her blouse.

“To hell with the fire,” Rae said in low sensual voice that would always and forever make Sarah go weak in the knees. She was ushered upstairs on wobbly legs.

*******

They lay in each other’s arms, completely and wonderfully sated.

“Remind me to take you back to The Snake Pit from time to time,” Rae said raggedly. “How did we get at the foot of the bed?”

“I have no idea.” Sarah sighed deeply. “That was better than any workout. I wasn’t at all sure my body could bend in quite that angle.”

Rae laughed and pulled her close. “I threw a lumbar disc or two myself.”

With that, the phone rang. Both of them groaned and looked around the room. The phone was on the floor across the room. “How the hell did my cell phone get over there?”

“That was you. It was on the nightstand. You nearly knocked it over with your gymnastics.” Sarah got out of bed to get the phone. Limping slightly, she made her way over and picked it up.

Rae watched her, loving the way her body moved and chuckling as she stretched her back. She handed the phone to Rae.

“Hello?” Rae laughed as she watched Sarah wince.

There was no one on the other line. Rae thought she heard breathing.

“Look, pal, if this is an obscene phone call, you’re barking up the wrong lesbi—”

“It’s Mark Rhodes. I’m…” His voice stopped as he took a deep breath.

“Mark, what’s wrong? Where are you?” she asked calmly.

“They know about you. I’m sorry, I tried. I need to get out of town fast.”

“Mark. Where are you?”

“Belmont Harbor...”

“You stay right there. I’ll be there in ten minutes,” Rae said and listened. She could hear his deep breathing as he mumbled.

“Okay. Okay.” Then the line went dead.

Rae tossed down the phone and dressed. Sarah followed suit, and both headed down the stairs. Rae stopped and looked back at Sarah.

“Sarah,” she said, and Sarah put up her hand.

“I’m going. We’re wasting time.” She pushed Rae toward the door.

It took ten minutes. At one in the morning, there was little traffic as Rae pulled into the parking lot at the harbor. Rae had called Delia, who was to meet them.

Rae glanced at Sarah, who held up her hand.

“Don’t tell me to wait here.”

“Sarah, you’d be safer.”

“Safer? You think I’d be safer alone? Christ, don’t you watch horror movies? Good grief, you never separate, ever,” she exclaimed. “So don’t even think about it.”

Rae hung her head at the absurd situation. Twenty minutes earlier, they were in the throes of unbridled lust. Now Rae started to chuckle.

“Are you all right? God, don’t go nuts on me now,” Sarah said seriously.

Rae stopped, opened the glove compartment, and took out a flashlight. “C’mon, you insane woman.”

They saw Delia’s car pull next to them. “Never a dull moment, Rae,” Delia said as she got out. She too had a large flashlight in hand. She smiled and motioned to Sarah. “Your shadow is coming along?” 

Rae chuckled. “You never, ever separate. Don’t you watch horror movies, Detective Grainger?”

Sarah glared at both of them and stood her ground. “Are you two finely honed investigative minds going to stand there making jokes or find that poor boy?”

Shamefaced, they led the way to the harbor dock.

“Okay, let’s split up,” Delia said.

Rae nodded and took Sarah’s arm, leading them in the opposite direction.

They walked toward the rocks that lined the beach. “Watch your step, these rocks get pretty slick,” Rae said.

Sarah nodded and followed. Then she saw something move down by the shoreline. “Rae, shine your light, about fifty feet.” Sarah pointed to the rocks that jutted out along the Lake Michigan shore. The wind had picked up as Rae raised her flashlight. The high beam searched the rocks, then Rae saw him, as well.

“How in the hell did you see him?” Rae asked absently, then whistled sharply. In the distance, she heard Delia whistle back.

They made their way closer. Rae turned to Sarah, who just nodded.

“I’ll wait. You’re in much better shape than I,” she admitted, knowing she would have a hard time maneuvering on the rocks. Sarah could be stubborn, but her mother didn’t raise an idiot. “Be careful,” she warned anxiously.

“Go get Delia.” Rae smiled and winked. Sarah gave her a curious look.

“You’re enjoying this,” she exclaimed quietly as Rae pushed her.

“Go, go,” Rae insisted and headed for the shore.

Delia was jogging toward them as she came up to Sarah. “He’s out by the rocks. Rae’s already on her way,” Sarah said a bit breathless.

Delia handed Sarah her phone and flashlight. “This is a police phone. Press 11, it’s a direct line to my precinct. If anything happens, you call that, don’t wait,” she said firmly, and Sarah nodded, taking the phone. Delia smiled and jogged toward Rae. She turned and called out, “The other is a flashlight, you just turn it on…”

Sarah glared at her and shined the beam right at her. “Like this?” she said smugly as Delia laughed and turned away.

“They’re both insane,” she whispered as the high beam illuminated the way for Delia.

Rae was making her way toward Mark. He was lying half in the water and half on the rocks. As the gods above laughed, the wind picked up and the waves started. She was just about to him when a wave took him.

The huge wave easily swept him off the rock. “Shit,” Rae cursed as she got there a second too late. Just out of her grasp, the lake took him. She heard Delia call to her, but by now, the wind was whipping around and the whitecaps were forming. Rae couldn’t see, but she knew the waves would be coming quicker. She had to make a decision. She couldn’t tell where he was. Sarah’s beam from the flashlight searched the lake, and she found him. Rae glanced back at Sarah and gratefully waved.

Delia was at her side, breathing heavily. She realized what Rae was about to do.

“Don’t, Rae, you know this lake. The undercurrent will…”

Rae wasn’t listening. She looked at Mark, who was semi-conscious and floundering horribly only thirty feet from them.

“If I don’t go now, the next one will take him.” Rae stripped off her jacket.

She dove in, the freezing temperature of the water instantly shocking her. She came up gasping and swam to Mark. He wasn’t as far as she thought but far enough. A few strokes, and she was on him. Quickly grabbing him, she turned and headed back to Delia, who was lying on her stomach reaching for him.

The waves crashed against them as Rae struggled with all her might to reach Delia’s outstretched hand. Finally, she came close enough and pushed Mark closer. He was groaning as Delia grabbed his collar and pulled with every ounce of strength she had.

Together, they hoisted him on the rock. Rae looked behind her and saw a wave coming.

“Get him off this fucking rock!” she called, and Delia pulled him. At the same time, he tried to help himself. Delia laid him safely against the rock and immediately turned to Rae, who floundered on the slippery rocks, trying to get a foothold.

Then it happened—the whitecaps came and crashed into the rocks, sweeping Rae off and pulling her under.

It was an odd feeling. Rae could hear the roar of the waves, but it was pitch-black as the water engulfed her. I am not dying in Lake Michigan, she thought angrily and reached for the surface. She was frozen. Her body numbed as she broke through and gasped for air. She looked around and tried to gauge how far off she was. She heard Delia screaming for her and saw Sarah standing at the rocks.

She never swam so fast and hard in her life, never taking her eyes off Sarah’s scared and worried face. Never in her life had she wanted to live so badly.

She got to the rocks before another wave hit. Between the both of them, they hauled her freezing body out of the frigid water. Off in the distance, Rae heard the sirens, and suddenly, there were paramedics everywhere.

Sarah was hugging the life out of her as Rae shivered and held on to her. “I’m okay. I’m okay,” she insisted as her teeth chattered.

A paramedic threw a blanket around her as they walked back up the shoreline. Sarah had her arm around her waist, guiding her.

“What in the world were you thinking? You could have been killed,” she admonished as the tears sprang into her eyes.

Rae was shivering uncontrollably as she stopped and turned to her.

“S-stop n-nagging.” She smiled as her lips quivered.

Mark was on a stretcher and put in an ambulance. Delia, with a blanket wrapped around her, talked to a policeman while directing traffic. She turned to Rae and Sarah.

“Your chariot awaits.” She pointed to the ambulance.

Rae shook her head. “I’m fine. I don’t—” She was interrupted by two paramedics, Sarah and Delia, as they shoved her into the ambulance.

Chapter 24

Sarah paced in the ER waiting room. Delia came out chuckling. “She’s fine, Sarah. Go on in.”

Sarah kissed her cheek and dashed past her. The nurse just pulled back the curtain. Rae sat there wearing hospital greens, pulling on the drawstring of the pants.

“These are comfy. I can keep them?” she was asking, sounding like a little kid.

“Yes, only if you leave now before you upset another nurse,” the old doctor scolded and flipped her chart closed.

Sarah stood there and watched as Rae turned five shades of red and frowned. “I’m sorry, Doc. I just hate hospitals... No offense.”

He turned to her and examined her arm. “None taken. Nice scar you have there. What happened?”

Sarah waited to see what concocted scenario she would give. To her amazement and admiration, Rae took a deep breath and told him the truth.

“I was in the navy. A grenade went off too close. It’s shrapnel,” she said quietly. She then looked up to see Sarah standing there with tears in her eyes.

“Hello,” Rae said quietly as Sarah stood next to her, running her fingers through her wet hair. Her skin was still freezing.

The old doctor ignored them as he looked at her arm. “Hmm. Pretty good work, though. Lost quite a bit of bicep. I was a navy doctor when I was younger. Saw quite a bit of shrapnel injuries, but that was in ’Nam. How is it that you were that close to a live grenade?”

Rae was still gazing at Sarah. She took a deep breath and never took her eyes off Sarah. “I could tell you, Doc, but then I’d have to kill you.”

Sarah rolled her eyes and laughed quietly. The doctor chuckled. “Well, I can’t have that. I have an ER to run. Now get out of my hospital. There’s nothing wrong with you that a good hot bath won’t cure.”

He then looked at Sarah. “You seem to have some interest here, young woman. No alcohol, no running around for twenty-four hours. No diving in Lake Michigan. Keep her quiet if that’s possible,” he said over his shoulder as he walked away.

“Okay, let’s get you home,” Sarah said as Rae slowly stood. She then reached down and cupped Sarah’s warm face in her cold hands. Gently kissing her, Rae took a deep, quivering breath.

“All I saw was your face,” she whispered. “And that was enough for me.”

Tears sprang into her eyes as she thought how easily Rae could be somewhere at the bottom of Lake Michigan right now. Rae watched her, knowing what she was thinking. She gave her a reassuring hug.

“You can’t get rid of me that easily,” she said lightly as they walked out.

Delia sat in a chair...sleeping. They stood in front of her and Rae grunted. “Detective Grainger,” she barked, and Delia jumped up, completely disoriented.

“Shit,” she cursed as she sat back down. “Don’t do that. How do you feel?” She raised an eyebrow as she looked at her outfit. “How come you get to wear those?” Delia asked childishly.

 Rae looked down at herself and smiled. “I get to keep them,” she said proudly.

Sarah took her by the arm. “Come, children.”

“Wait. How’s Mark? Where is he?” Rae asked, and Delia took her other arm.

“He’s in a room, sleeping. I asked him a couple questions, but all I could get out of him was ‘be careful, they know,’” she said as they ushered Rae out into the autumn night. “I’ve got to get back and file a report. Maybe now they’ll reopen this. I don’t know.”

“You need to get some sleep, Delia,” Rae said seriously. “Thanks. That boy would’ve drowned if you weren’t there. We both would have. I’ll stop by in the morning.”

“Oh, no, you won’t. Twenty-four hours. Doctor’s orders,” Sarah said as she pushed her into the car. “She’ll talk to you later in the day. Good night, Delia, go get some sleep.” She kissed her cheek and pushed her toward her car.

*******

Jane stood by her bedroom window. Standing there alone, she put her hand to her eyes and wept. The argument with Pam earlier didn’t help. For some reason, Jane just wanted to be in her own apartment that night. She didn’t want to stay with Pam, who was angry, to say the least.

Amy’s parents noticed the awkward silence as they drove to the hotel. Mrs. Davis got out and hugged Jane fiercely. “You take care, Janie. Get some sleep. It’ll be a long day.”

Jane hugged her in return, then pulled back with tears in her eyes. “I should be taking care of you.” She wiped away her tears.

Mrs. Davis put a motherly hand to her cheek. “You’ve been a good friend to Amy. Let me feel like a mother once again,” she said in a shaky voice and kissed her cheek.

“We’ll pick you up in the morning. Sleep well.” Jane watched until they walked into the hotel and out of sight.

She had turned to Pam, who was scowling as she got back into the car. Jane took a deep, sad breath. The rest of the drive was completely silent. Pam stared at the road, and Jane looked out her window.

Now she stood there crying. Something had changed in Pam, and she couldn’t put her finger on it. Thinking about their year together, she realized quite a bit had happened.

When she first met Pam, she was instantly attracted to her. She was strong and confident, and Jane was drawn to that. Their courtship was fast and furious—not what Jane wanted, but she was caught up in Pam’s insistent, firm position. They were lovers within the month, and Jane moved in two weeks later.

Only in the past few months did Jane decide to take an apartment near the university. She said it was because of her classes, but they both knew it was because of the affair Pam had with Amy.

It was a short steamy month apparently for Amy and Pam. When Jane found out, she was heartbroken, but somehow, she was not surprised. Looking back on it, if she was more in tune with herself and Pam, she would have seen it coming. Pam was staying later at the bookstore, and Amy was not coming over as frequently as she used to.

Amy Davis, dead. Jane still couldn’t believe it. To be honest, Jane always thought she’d wind up in some trouble but not dead. She had a wild, adventurous streak in her. Jane remembered when she first met Amy, she liked her right away; most people did. Whether it was her eccentric approach to life and love or just her smile, Amy drew women to her. That was what might have happened to Rae Jefferson. The way Amy raved about her, Jane thought for a happy moment that perhaps she finally met someone who could calm her down. That unfortunately was not the case.

She sighed sadly and got into bed, pulling the covers up to her chin. Her mind racing, she couldn’t get Pam and Amy out of her mind. Who would want to kill Amy? What was she in to? Or was it just a horrible accident?

As she faded off to an uneasy sleep, she couldn’t help but think Rae Jefferson was right. Someone killed Amy Davis, and that someone was still out there.

*******

Rae was dying for a cigarette. She hadn’t had the urge in such a long while. She looked at the clock—it was six in the morning. She let out a small groan. Sarah stirred next to her but didn’t wake. Rae winced and eased herself out of bed. Her body turned against her as every muscle ached. She was lucky she didn’t drown the previous night. She threw on a robe and quietly left the snoring Sarah.

She put on the coffee—sleep was impossible now—and sat at the dining room table. She looked through the ComTele employee files she still had to work on and picked up Mike Porter’s file. There has to be a connection, she thought. The odds were just too stacked.

She took out her cell phone and dialed Delia. “Get up, you lazy thing,” she said, smiling.

On the other end, Delia groaned. “God. Don’t you ever sleep? The rest of the world is still in quiet slumber.”

“Quit grousing, you’re too young. Look, can you get me that autopsy report or not?”

“Let me call McGrath and feel him out. I’ll call you later. Does Sarah know you’re out of bed?”

“Very funny. I’ll call you at noon.” She snapped the phone shut and set it on the table. “Okay, I need to get things in order here,” she said absently as she took a piece of paper and her pen.

First, she met Amy at the bar and well... Rae frantically tried to remember when the hell she would have given Amy her business card. In the end, she knew she didn’t. Then why would Amy lift a card out of her wallet? She then tried to remember their conversation.

During dinner, they talked absently about her school and her love of literature. Amy spoke of her hometown in Michigan, and she remembered her saying how much she needed to get to a big city. The small farming town was just not for her.

Once they got back to Rae’s, it was a bit hazy. She vaguely remembered there wasn’t much talking. Amy had to have taken her card afterward and before Rae woke.

Rae leaned back and closed her eyes. “What did she say that morning?” she asked out loud. Then she sat up and opened her eyes. Amy had said she was supposed to do something, but now, she just couldn’t and had to change plans.

Rae frowned and tiredly rubbed her eyes. “What did that mean?” she asked. “Shit.” She glanced at her watch. It was six thirty as she dialed Jane’s number.

Gratefully, Jane was an early riser as she picked up the phone. Rae asked to meet her for coffee. She had a few things rolling around in her head, and Jane agreed to meet her at the diner a few blocks away.

Rae quietly gathered her clothes and scribbled a note. She knew she’d be in deep with Sarah when she got back.

*******

Jane sat in the booth drinking coffee as Rae walked in. “My, you’re up early.” Jane smiled.

Rae rolled her eyes. “This is nothing, trust me. I took the liberty of calling Delia, if you don’t mind.” Rae gratefully held her cup up to the waitress. “I need to bounce a few things off her head. She may be a grump. Delia Grainger is not a morning person.”

Jane actually blushed and put a hand to her hair.

Rae watched her and knew what she was thinking. “You look fine. Now…Oh, here she is.”

Delia was coming toward her, frowning and yawning.

“This better be good, you asshole,” she grumbled, then noticed Jane. The color rose quickly as she glared at Rae. “Miss Whiting, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you’d be here.”

“Shut up and sit.” Rae pointed next to Jane, who slid over to make room. She was equally blushing.

Delia slid in and smiled at Jane. “Good morning,” she said as the waitress filled her cup and she picked up a menu.

“Good morning, Detective,” she offered and drank her coffee.

“I wanted Delia here. I may need some legal advice,” Rae said.

Delia gave her a wary grin. “What are you planning?” she asked, concentrating on the menu.

The waitress came up, and Delia gave her a healthy order. Jane and Rae declined food.

“Breakfast is the most important meal of the day,” Delia reminded them.

Rae then retold the previous night’s adventure to Jane, who was astonished as she listened. She glanced every now and then at Delia, who was oblivious as she ate her pancakes.

“Do you know this Mark Rhodes?” Rae asked.

“He attends Northwestern. He was close to Amy, they were good friends,” she said a bit hesitantly. Delia eyed Rae for a moment, then concentrated on her breakfast, saying nothing.

“How close?” Rae prodded. Both noticed Jane’s uncomfortable posture.

“I think they may have been lovers at one point,” she said.

“It would appear Miss Davis got around,” Delia said as she drank her coffee.

Jane shot her a defensive look, which Delia took in professional stride. “No offense meant,” she said.

Jane still looked perturbed. “You never met her. She may have had a wild streak, but she was just looking for someone to love her. She had little or no self-esteem and was constantly looking for approval. So before you make up your mind…” She stopped and put a shaky hand to her forehead.

Delia turned in the booth and put a warm hand over hers. “I do apologize. I’m just trying to help this nut,” she motioned to Rae, “figure out who killed your friend. She was into something, I agree with Rae on that. And someone threw her alive into the Chicago River.”

Rae gaped at Delia. “How do you figure she was still alive?” 

Delia reached in the breast pocket of her jacket and pulled out a few folded pages. “Read it and give it back to me. I went to the Twelfth Precinct to visit a friend,” she assured the wary Rae. “And McGrath was there. We had a nice little chat, and he was called away from his desk. Now read it.”

Rae cautiously took the pages and opened them.

“Uh-oh. By the way, Sarah called me a little bit ago, and I told her where we’d be,” Delia said so fast that Rae couldn’t keep up.

“You what?” she asked, then felt someone behind her. She turned in the booth, and there stood Sarah sporting a smug look. Rae turned back to Delia, who gave her a sheepish grin.

“She scared me,” Delia offered, and Jane chuckled. Rae stood, and without a word, Sarah slid in and smiled at Jane.

“Good morning, Jane. I hope these two idiots haven’t bothered you.” Sarah winked at her.

“No, not at all. We were just talking about Mark Rhodes.”

Rae glanced at Sarah, who gave her a sweet smile. “Good morning, Rae. Delia, how are you?” she asked as the waitress came up. “Coffee, yes, please.” She held her cup. “So continue.” 

Rae showed her the report. “The autopsy,” she said as she read. The others sat in silence as Delia continued eating.

“You have a healthy appetite, Detective.” Jane smiled. “You must. Protecting the community and all,” she said with a trace of sarcasm.

Delia shot her a look and laughed. “Yes, but it doesn’t get me groceries,” she reminded her, and Jane laughed.

Rae and Sarah glanced at each other, figuring it to be a private joke.

After a few minutes, Rae folded the pages and gave them back to Delia, who placed them back in the breast pocket of her jacket. “So.” She looked at Rae.

“She was still alive. Maybe it was an accident.” Rae sighed. “There were traces of cocaine in her system.”

“Wait. Amy was not a drug user. At least I don’t think she was,” Jane started, then stopped. Rae watched her as her mind raced. She looked as though she were trying to recall something.

Then something struck Rae. Her mind raced back to dinner with Amy. “Jane, when I asked Amy if she moved to Chicago because of our beautiful lakefront, she told me she was terrified of water. Is that true?”

Jan thought for a moment. “Come to think of it, yes. Pam used to kid her about it when we’d go to the beach. I remember her not going anywhere near the shoreline. I’m sure of it, I think. Oh, I don’t know anything anymore,” she finally said, then inexplicably, she buried her face in her hands and wept.

Delia naturally put an arm around her. “It’s all right, Jane.”

She wept sad tears as Sarah handed her a napkin. After a few moments, she stopped and chuckled nervously. “God, I’m sorry. I don’t know where that came from.”

“I do,” Sarah said tenderly and held her hand.

Rae’s mind raced. Amy had traces of cocaine and alcohol in her system. She then thought of her apartment. Her furnishings were anything but ordinary, especially for a young college student. “Where did she get the money for that?” she asked out loud, forgetting that anyone was there.

Delia knew exactly what she was thinking. She glanced at Jane, who was still drying her eyes. “Jane, what exactly do you know of Amy’s life? I mean, who she knew other than you, who she was intimate with?”

Jane stiffened and avoided their inquisitive looks. “I-I know she was involved with Mark. Mike liked her, but she told me he wasn’t her type, and she wasn’t interested in him. She knew Molly just from classes and this Jerry Truman. I’ve never seen him before, but Pam…” She stopped abruptly.

Rae and Delia exchanged glances but said nothing. Sarah still held her hand.

“Jane, someone killed Amy. I hate to say this, but I think Pam may know something, however innocuous. Where is she now?” Rae asked.

Jane took a deep, quivering breath. “We…I went home last night. We argued.” She glanced at Delia. “Pam. She’s a good person,” she started again.

Rae inwardly grimaced. When someone started a sentence like that, it was all over. She looked at Delia, who probably thought the same thing.

Jane continued. “Lately, in the last few months, she’s become distant and very hard. She and Amy were very close,” she stumbled over her words.

Then it struck Rae. She knew Pam was being overly protective and wondered why. She gave Jane a sad look. “Did Pam and Amy have an affair?”

Delia frowned, and Sarah was shocked. Jane hung her head and just nodded.

There was silence for a moment or two. “They were sleeping together for a month. Then Amy broke it off, only after I found out. I saw them both coming out of The Snake Pit, quite by accident. I was at a red light on my way home, and I saw them... Pam was apologetic and was desperate to start over. I-I loved Pam. I didn’t want it to end. But now.” She stared out the window. “I don’t know her anymore. There have been times she’s like another person. She can be a bit cruel and dominating. Almost as if she owns me.” Her voice trailed off, and no one said a word.

The three of them exchanged sad glances. Delia pushed her plate away, unable to finish.

“When was this, Jane?” Rae finally asked.

Jane, shaken from her reverie, smiled and looked at all of them. “Oh, about six months ago or so. I shouldn’t be talking about this. It’s not fair, but it’s such a relief to say it openly,” she finished sadly, put her head back against the booth, and looked out the window again.

Delia’s beeper went off. She looked at it and cursed. “Crap, I gotta go,” She quickly stood, gulping down her coffee. “I’ll see you at the funeral if I can make it,” she said to Rae and Sarah.

She then put her hand on Jane’s shoulder. “You’re better than this, you know.”

Jane looked up at her with tears in her eyes. “Am I? How do you know?”

Delia flashed a grin and put on her sunglasses. “I’m a cop. So don’t argue with me,” she said firmly and looked at Rae. “Take care of her. If you need anything, let me know.”

She walked away, and Jane watched her the entire time with a sad, lonely look on her face.

“C’mon.” Rae hailed the waitress. “You go home and get ready. We’ll be at the funeral home by ten.”

Jane stood, then reached out to Rae and held her arm. “Do you honestly think Pam has something to do with this?”

Rae smiled and patted her hand. “Honestly, I don’t know, but why don’t you just go by yourself this morning? I’d feel better if you weren’t alone with Pam right now. I’m probably all wrong, but I’ve just got a hunch.”

Jane nodded as Sarah gave her a hug. “We’ll pick you up?”

“No, thanks. I have to pick up Amy’s parents at the hotel at nine. I’ll be fine,” she assured them.

Then for some inexplicable reason, the hair on the back of Rae’s neck bristled.

Chapter 25

The ride back to Sarah’s was quiet for about thirty seconds. “How do you feel?” Sarah asked with icy detachment.

Rae winced at the tone as she watched the road. “Fine. Look, Sarah. I’m sorry, but—” She was interrupted by Sarah putting up her hand.

“No need to explain, really. I understand. You’re a lone wolf. You really don’t need anyone. You’re just fine on your own. You’ve lived your whole life that way. How can I expect you to change? It’s your life, sweetie. You live it the way you want,” she finished and smiled at her. Then she reached over and patted her leg.

Rae was frowning as she watched the road. “It’s not that I don’t need anyone.”

Sarah let out a sad chuckle. “Oh, yes, it is. I know that look. My ex had it whenever she got the long assignment. She was off and running. I do understand,” she said honestly. “I’m not blaming you. Truly, I’m not.”

She was sincere, and Rae didn’t know what to think. Gratefully, however, Sarah changed the topic. “So you think Pam is involved somehow.”

Rae sighed. “Yes, I do. My gut says drugs are involved. The furnishings in Amy’s apartment are just too expensive for an out-of-work college student. How could she possibly afford that?”

“Maybe her parents,” Sarah offered logically. Rae thought for a moment, then shook her head.

“I don’t think so. Did her parents strike you as the rich type? A small farming town in Michigan? No,” she said decisively as she pulled up to Sarah’s house.

“Well, why don’t you pick me up in a couple of hours? Go home and relax for a while.” Sarah kissed her. Rae sat there blinking.

“Well, o-okay. I’ll see you in a bit.”

Sarah smiled and nearly tumbled out of the jeep. “Good grief, this car, or whatever you call it.” She laughed and slammed the door. “Don’t be late.” She winked, then walked away.

Rae sat there for a moment and watched her as Sarah entered her house.

“Shit,” she cursed out loud as she pulled away from the curb.

Her heart told her to run to her, forget the past and everything, and just cling to Sarah. If she pushed her away long enough, she’d leave. Is that what you want? her heart asked.

“I wish my heart would keep its big mouth shut,” she grumbled childishly.

*******

Across town, Jane stood in the shower, the hot water beating down on her. Deep in her heart, she knew Pam was somehow involved in this. She wasn’t completely honest with Rae and the rest of them. She had put two and two together months ago.

Amy was buying things with a flourish. Pam was also spending more and more. She said her bookstore was doing quite well, although whenever Jane stopped in, there were never more than two people in the store at a time.

Amy’s wild streak, Pam’s mood swings. She stepped out of the shower and dried herself. She’d tell Rae this after the funeral. Delia and Rae were right. It was drugs. How they got them, Jane didn’t know.

Then she grinned, thinking of Delia Grainger. She nearly jumped out of her skin when Delia’s warm hand touched hers. She never, ever felt like that with Pam. No passion with her, no romance. No lovemaking, just sex. Jane was not as experienced as Pam, so when they started their relationship, Jane followed Pam’s lead.

In the short year, however, Jane had grown up. Seeing Pam’s dark and unfaithful sides, she realized perhaps Delia was right. Perhaps she was better than this.

The shrill sound of her phone broke her thoughts as she jumped. It was Pam, an angry Pam.

“Where have you been?” she demanded as Jane pulled the towel around her.

“I was in the shower.”

“For the last hour?”

“What do you want? Aren’t you tired of this? I know I am,” she said in uncharacteristic control.

“Are you really? I’m sure the cop thinks so, too. How was breakfast?” she asked smugly.

Jane froze for an instant. She followed her? She took a deep, calming breath. “If you saw me, why didn’t you stop in? The four of us were talking about Amy, that’s all. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to get ready. I’m picking up Doug and Helen at nine. I’ll see you then.” She tried not to notice her own hands shaking. There was dead silence for a moment.

“I’m not letting you go, Jane. Please remember that,” she said in a low angry voice, then banged down the phone.

Jane stood there, shivering, staring at the phone. She then put it down and walked away.

*******

Delia walked out of the precinct and put on her sunglasses. She didn’t notice the red car across the street as she got into her own car and drove away.

She pulled into the parking lot of a deli and got out. Delia, unaware of what was about to happen, walked around her car through the parking lot. She heard the squeal of tires too late.

The last thing she remembered was the flash of red.

*******

The day turned cold, dark, and dreary as they stood by the casket. The priest spoke kindly about Amy. Jane then walked up and said a few words about her friend. Rae noticed Pam just staring at the closed casket with a blank look on her face. She also noticed Pam holding a hanky and fidgeting nervously with it.

Rae smiled ruefully, she couldn’t blame her. Even though this was just a small family service, wakes and funerals were barbaric to Rae. She then looked over at Amy’s parents. Her mother was sobbing, and her father tried to be stoic as he held on to her. But in the end, he too sobbed quietly.

Sarah stood next to Rae with such a look of sadness on her face that it broke Rae’s heart. She’d wipe her eyes and sniff as she listened to Jane’s eulogy. Rae reached down and took her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Sarah looked up, smiled through her tears, and held her hand.

Mercifully, it was over, and as they silently walked back to their car, Rae and Sarah waited for Jane and Pam. They helped Amy’s parents into the car, then Jane walked over to Rae and Sarah, hugging them both. “Thanks so much for coming... I really needed the support,” she said tiredly.

Sarah put her arm around her. “Where are you going now?”

“Doug and Helen just want to be alone. I don’t blame them. Pam and I are taking them back to the hotel.” She stopped and glanced back at Pam. She then looked at Rae.

“I need to talk to you, Rae. Can we meet later?” she asked, and with that, Rae’s cell phone rang.

She answered it, and Sarah and Jane watched her face turn white.

“Where? Is she all right?” she asked angrily, then snapped the phone shut. She looked at both of them. “Delia’s in the hospital. Hit-and-run.”

Jane turned an ashen color and covered her face. Rae took her by the shoulders. “You can come with us if you want, but I have to go now.”

Jane took a deep breath and nodded. “Give me one second.” She hurried back to Pam. From the look on Pam’s face, she wasn’t thrilled. Jane explained to Doug and Helen, who urged her to go.

Rae raced to Illinois Masonic Hospital. She darted in and out of traffic as she cursed every driver in her way.

“What happened?” Sarah asked softly.

Rae took a deep breath. “Apparently, she was going into the deli on Broadway and some motherfucker,” she spat out angrily, and Sarah reached over and gently touched her knee. Rae calmed and continued, “Someone came screaming through the parking lot and hit her, then just took off like a cowardly fucker.” 

In the backseat, Jane sat staring out the window, praying that Delia would be all right. Her heart was beating so fast, she heard it pounding in her ears.

They pulled into the emergency parking lot, then finding her room, they raced to the second floor. Rae ran down the hallway and stopped at her room. The doctor was just coming out. It was the old doctor from the ER. He smiled when he saw Rae.

“I knew you’d be here. She’ll be all right. A broken leg. A mild concussion, facial bruises. All in all, she’s one lucky woman. A witness said she jumped to get out of the way at the last minute. If she hadn’t, I’m sure I’d be telling you a different story. No internal injuries,” he said fatherly and patted Rae’s shoulder. “She’ll be fine.”

Rae nodded. Sarah noticed her trembling but said nothing. “Can we see her?” 

“Just for a few minutes. She’ll be out of it for a while. Don’t get her riled up.” He smiled and walked away.

Rae took a quivering breath and walked in, followed by Sarah and Jane. She heard Jane gasp as she looked at Delia.

She was lying there, her right leg in a cast and hoisted on some contraption. A small bandage covered her brow, and the left side of her face was red and raw with scratches and bruises.

They stood there just looking at her. Rae frowned deeply, looking over her body. “Goddamn them.” She let out an angry sigh as Delia’s eyelids fluttered.

Rae’s face changed in an instant. She smiled and took her hand. “You’re supposed to look both ways. Didn’t your mother teach you anything?”

Delia smiled and held on to her hand. “Fuck you,” she whispered, and Rae laughed quietly. Delia then looked over to see Sarah and Jane. “Jane, have you nothing better to do?” she asked and winked. “Hey, Sarah.”

Sarah bent down and kissed her brow. “How are you feeling? Stupid question?” She smoothed her hair.

Delia smiled. “You are one lucky woman, Rae.” She closed her eyes.

Thinking Delia was sleeping, Sarah moved out of the way, and Jane stood by her head. “Your luck might change someday, Detective,” she whispered and put her hand on Delia’s shoulder.

The nurse came in to check on the IVs. “Just another minute,” she said and walked out.

Delia then opened her eyes and blinked a few times. “Rae. The car. It was red. That’s all I remember,” she said tiredly.

Rae frowned again. Delia was too out of it to make the connection, but Rae did. The red sedan of Mike Porter.

“Okay. You rest now,” she said as her voice caught in her throat. She bent down and kissed her head. “Sleep. I’ll take care of everything.”

Delia nodded, then looked at all of them. “Now get out of here. Don’t you know I’m concussed?”

Rae chuckled. “You were born concussed. I’ll stop by in the morning.”

Sarah smiled and kissed her. “Me too.”

Delia gave Jane a slight smile. “Will you come back to see me?”

Jane was beside herself with every emotion she could think of. She only nodded and tried to be strong, but it didn’t work. She put her hands to her face and let out a heart-wrenching sob. Delia frowned and cursed her limitations. She couldn’t move. “Jane…Jane, look at me.”

Sarah gave Rae the high sign and motioned to the door. Rae, in a stupid moment, had no clue what she wanted. Sarah rolled her eyes and walked around the bed and pulled Rae out of the room.

Jane and Delia just looked at each other, unaware that they left. “Jane, please don’t cry. I’m sorry about Amy, and I know Pam is a disappointment right now,” she started, and Jane cut her off.

“I don’t care about any of that. I just can’t stand to see you in pain like this,” she blurted out and started crying again.

Delia lay there, stupefied. Happy, but stupefied. “Oh” was all she could come up with.

“Please, go to sleep. I-I’ll come back to see you. I…” She stopped, then she bent down and kissed her and hurried out of the room.

Delia lay there, staring stupidly at the door. A contented grin flashed across her face as she sighed and drifted off to sleep.

*******

The waitress came up for their order. None of them was thinking about food. Sarah ordered coffee as did Rae. Jane wanted nothing.

“You’ve got to eat,” Sarah offered, and Jane shrugged.

“She’ll have a salad and soup,” Rae said firmly and handed the menu to the waitress.

“Thanks for taking care of me. I feel like a helpless idiot.” She sighed in a dejected tone. “Pam always says I’m like a helpless bird, but I’m not a complete idiot,” she said almost angrily.

Rae reached across and took her hand. “Listen to me. You’re not helpless and you’re not an idiot. And if you ask me, anyone who thinks so doesn’t have your best interests at heart. You’re too young and smart to waste your time on people like that.”

Sarah looked at her watch. “Well, I’ve got a vulgar amount of papers to grade.” She reached over and took Jane’s hand. “Try not to worry about anything. Call me or stop by my office if you’d like, sweetie,” she said in her soft lilting voice. Jane nodded as once again the tears sprang into her eyes.

“I’ll talk to you later, Rae.” Sarah kissed her cheek.

Rae nodded and grabbed her arm as she slid out of the booth. “I-I,” she stumbled all over herself.

Sarah stood and laughed quietly. “I’ll talk to you later,” she said again and walked away.

They both watched her as she walked out of the diner. “Professor Connelly is truly a good woman,” Jane said.

Rae turned back to her and agreed. “Better than I could ever imagine,” she said almost to herself. The waitress came with the food, and Jane groaned. “Eat. You haven’t eaten all day. Afterward, you’re going home, and I think I may have a chat with Mike Porter to see if he’s been to the deli lately,” she said, drinking her coffee.

“You think he...?” Jane asked with a mouthful of salad.

“I don’t know. Delia said the car was red. I know it’s not the only red car in Chicago, but there is just way too much going on to be coincidental. Mark Rhodes said, ‘They know.’ I’m assuming whoever ‘they’ are, they’re watching us. Perhaps Delia was a warning.” Her voice trailed off.

Jane picked at her salad as Rae watched her. “Okay, what’s on your mind?”

Jane sat back and put her fork down. “I-I think you may have been right all along about the drugs.” She explained her theory about Amy and Pam.

“Hmm. That would explain the expensive furnishings in Amy’s apartment. Perhaps she was dealing,” she said absently, then looked at Jane. “Do you think Pam could be dealing?”

Jane rubbed her forehead with a shaky hand. “I don’t know anything anymore. I’d hate to accuse Pam of something like that.”

Now Rae was worried, really worried. She looked at Jane, who was staring at her plate. Sarah was safe at home. Delia was in the hospital. Where was Pam?

Chapter 26

Rae drove toward The Snake Pit and parked across the street. It was three in the morning as she yawned wildly. The last of the patrons left, and she saw Pete come outside with a young man and lock the front door. He gave it a secure yank, and they walked arm in arm down the street and out of sight. Rae then pulled away, parked a block away, and walked back.

She went around to the back entrance and tugged quietly; she knew it was locked. She checked the door and the window, making sure there were no signs of an alarm system. These buildings in Chicago were very old, and most of them had no security at all. She highly doubted if a dump like The Snake Pit would spare the expense.

She looked up to see a small window, which looked partially open. “What are the odds?” she whispered, looking around for something to stand on. She found a few wooden crates and placed them atop each other; she carefully stood on them and eased the dirty window open. With a grunt, she hoisted herself up and through the window, barely fitting.

Taking out a small pocket flashlight, she gave herself a minute or two for her eyes to adjust to the dark. She took a whiff and winced—stale beer and smoke. She shone the low beam around the storeroom. She walked through the room, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Boxes upon boxes of liquor were stacked in the corners; a walk-in icebox with a glass door held the beer. Then she noticed two doors. Quietly opening the one on the far right and shining her flashlight, she noticed stairs leading up to the bar.

She then walked over to the other door and gingerly opened it. It was pitch dark, and after a moment of walking around, she knew she was in the same place as the other night with Sarah.

“Shit, there’s got to be another room or,” she mumbled to herself but saw no other door.

Then to her horror, a light appeared. She saw the light shining through a crack in the wall and along the baseboard. Rae stood there for an instant, trying to figure out what was going on. Almost too afraid to move, she stupidly stared at the outline of light. She realized there must be a room behind the paneling. Then she realized she was not alone; someone had to turn on that light.

She looked around the dark room, then walked over to the far corner and turned off her flashlight. She just watched the light and waited. What was going on? she thought as she yawned again. Had to be drugs. Amy had to have been involved in something. Rae remembered her saying she was supposed to do something, but now she just couldn’t. What? And why did she take her business card? She knew Mike Porter was related to this mess, as well, as was that Jerry Truman fellow.

Then she heard a noise coming from behind the wall. She strained to hear the muffled voices. Then she heard someone cry out and took a step or two toward the wall. All at once, she was at the wall with her ear pressed against the panel.

“Don’t stop fucking me,” the woman’s voice called out.

Rae heard bedsprings bouncing and a man growling and moaning. Rae’s eyes widened, and she pulled back.

“Shit,” she whispered, and as she turned to walk away, she stumbled into a chair, knocking it over. Instantly, the bedsprings stopped bouncing, and Rae heard muffled voices again. Quickly, she righted the chair and headed for the storeroom door, quietly closing it, but leaving just enough open to see.

The secret door opened, and the light now lit up the rest of the room. Out walked Mike Porter, running a hand through his hair and wearing only his jeans. Rae squinted through the crack in the door and watched as he walked around the room. As he turned his back to Rae, she noticed the tattoo on his upper back of a snake across the top of his shoulders. Then a woman’s voice quietly called out. She came into view. Molly Eastman, Rae wasn’t surprised.

“What the hell is the matter?” She wore only his shirt, opened as she walked up to Mike.

“I dunno. I thought I heard something,” he said, and Rae noticed they were both excessively jittery. Both of them looked around, and Molly then jumped into his arms and giggled. “Fuck me right here.”

Oh, please, don’t, Rae begged.

Mike pulled her hair back and kissed her neck. “We’re not supposed to be here. If Truman knew, he’d skin us alive,” he said nervously and looked around.

Molly wrapped her legs around his lean waist and squirmed back and forth. “Don’t be a pussy, Mike. He doesn’t care as long as we do what we’re told,” she said in an almost threatening voice. “Besides, the rewards are too good. I almost wish he were here now. We had a good time earlier. I get so turned on when you two—” She was stopped by Mike roughly kissing her.

Mike walked her back into the room and closed the door. Within seconds, the bedsprings were getting a workout once again. Rae rolled her eyes and left the same way she came in. As she stepped off the crates, she could feel someone behind her. The hair on the back of her neck bristled as her mouth ran dry.

She then noticed another broken crate next to her. She picked up the piece of wood and whirled around, ready to swing it at her attacker.

Someone let out a small screech. Rae stopped in midswing, noticing it was Sarah, standing there with her hands held up in a defensive pose.

“Fuck me,” she whispered helplessly and put a hand to her heart, dropping the wood.

Sarah was holding her chest as if she were having a heart attack. “You scared the life out of me,” she whispered. “What are you doing here? I saw your jeep a block away, and I knew you’d be here.”

Rae, making sure her heart was still in her chest, grabbed her by the elbow and led her down the alley. “You are insane. I swear, you’re killing me. You must want me dead,” Rae said angrily as she pulled her.

Sarah, trying to keep up, stumbled for an instant. “I’m insane? You’re sneaking around in the middle of the night at this godforsaken place.”

They both looked up when they heard it. The revving of a car engine made them turn around. It was on them so quickly; all Rae could do was push Sarah out of the way. The car streaked toward them, knocking over crates and boxes as Rae dove headlong into a pile of garbage.

The car screamed past them as it turned the corner out of the alley, tires screeching all the way out of sight. Rae unearthed herself from the smelly garbage and rushed across to Sarah, who tossed a crate off her.

“Sarah, are you all right?” Rae asked anxiously as she helped her.

“I’m fine,” she said angrily as she brushed herself off, winced, and flexed her arm. “Sonofabitch,” she swore, and Rae raised an eyebrow.

“Are you all right, Charlie Chan?” she asked, and Rae stifled a chuckle.

“Fine. Let’s get out of here before he makes a command performance.”

*******

Rae flipped on the light in the kitchen as Sarah walked in. She turned, and her eyes widened in horror. “You’re bleeding,” Rae exclaimed and ushered Sarah to the dining room and pushed her into a chair.

“I am? Where?” Sarah looked down at herself.

Rae came out of the bathroom with her own arsenal of first aid.

“Your shoulder. Sit still now.”

 “My good blouse, damn you.”

Rae ignored her as she examined her shoulder through the tear in the blouse. “Is this an expensive blouse?”

“Yes, and it’s ruined. Do you know how much…?” Sarah let out a small cry as Rae ripped the blouse from shoulder to elbow.

“Do you feel a draft?” Sarah asked over her shoulder, and Rae laughed quietly.

“Sit still, you crazy goof.” Rae opened the bottle and smiled wickedly. “Your turn to cry like a little girl.”

Sarah gave her an exasperated glare. “Very funny.” She then sniffed the air. “Don’t you take out your garbage?”

“That’s my new cologne, sit still.”

She cleaned the scrapes on her shoulder. Sarah winced and pulled away. “Owie…” she whined pathetically.

“You big baby,” Rae scolded and blew on the stinging antiseptic. Rae finished with the first aid, then bent down and lightly kissed her shoulder, then her neck. “All done.”

“My, Commander Jefferson, you can be quite gentle when you want to be.” Sarah looked at her, and for the first time, she saw a worried look in her eyes. “I’m fine.”

She looked like she was going to say something, and Sarah watched her, waiting. Then a dark, almost sad look came over her face, and she let go of Sarah’s hand.

“Why don’t you stay here? I’ll take you home in the morning.”

*******

Sarah was sound asleep, snoring as Rae stared at the ceiling. She looked over at Sarah, who lay on her side, her hand resting on Rae’s shoulder. She knew the inevitable. Sarah was too good to be saddled with such a mess of a woman as herself. They should have never made love. It would have been easier if they hadn’t. Sarah Connelly would be better off, she told herself. Then she tried desperately not to think about it.

Her mind instantly wandered to that night’s mess. They were both almost killed. She knew it was no accident, and she knew Sarah knew it was no accident. She knew someone was trying to kill, or at the very least, scare the hell out of them. And after telling him, she knew Lieutenant McGrath would know this, as well.

With all of this great knowledge flying around, you’d think she could figure out who in the hell this someone was.

Chapter 27

Sarah was of no good use to anyone. Her students looked at one another as she stared out the window. She thought of Rae and how she left that morning—she had that confused, faraway look, and although she kissed Sarah deeply, Sarah felt the connection between them dissipate. Perhaps it was her imagination, but it worried her.

Finally, she looked at her puzzled students and chuckled.

“Okay, beat it. Go play.” She waved them all off.

Sitting behind the desk in the now empty classroom, she glanced at her watch. It was only ten thirty, and she didn’t have another class till midday. So she thought of going to see Delia.

On her way out, Betty Whitfield stopped her. “Sit down, I need to talk to you.” She ushered her to the teachers’ lounge.

Sarah looked across at her old friend and knew what was coming; she waited patiently.

Betty set a cup of tea in front of her and sat. “Now what’s going on? You look...bedraggled.”

Sarah chuckled quietly and told her of the night’s escapade. She told her everything, including her feelings for Rae. Betty listened as she sipped her tea, watching the sad look on Sarah’s face.

“So why the glum look? It seems you’re falling for her. Is that bad?” she prodded. Sarah took a deep breath and shrugged. “As I asked before, my dear, is it sex or is it love?”

Sarah looked into her eyes. “It’s love for me.” Her voice trailed off as tears sprang into her eyes.

“But you’re not too sure about Rae,” Betty finished for her. Sarah nodded and pulled a hanky out of her pocket.

“She’s been through too much, been alone, and lonely too long. She doesn’t think she’s good enough, or worthy, or something equally as asinine,” she said angrily and waved the hanky. “Damn that woman. Why did she have to come into my life now? Now when I was all set to—”

“To what? Set to be alone? To hide behind the ivy-covered walls? That’s not you, and you know it. If you love this woman, don’t give up on her. I see the way she looks at you. It’s not all physical. There’s deep affection there, trust me. I may be old, but I know love when I see it. Perhaps you’re right, she’s too scared to commit, too long alone.” She shook her head. “Love, wasted on the young.”

“Perhaps she doesn’t love me. We’ve only known each other for a short time. How can you fall in love that fast?” she said decisively and drank her tea.

“Well, there’s one way to find out. Back off and let her be for a while. I know you’re involved in this Amy Davis debacle. However, when it’s over and done...fade away for a bit and let her think clearly. It might be that whole, ‘let them go and if it’s meant to be, they’ll come back’ nonsense,” she said sarcastically, and Sarah laughed out loud. Betty had a folded piece of paper in her hand. She held it out to Sarah. “A message for you. She called twenty minutes ago. Read it.”

Sarah frowned and took the paper, expecting it to be from Rae. Her eyes widened, and she looked at Betty, who smiled wickedly and nodded.

“No, I can’t,” Sarah scolded gently and read it again. “Should I?”

Betty nodded again. “Yes, you should. This might be a good time to back off and give Rae some space.”

“I feel like I’m playing a game. I don’t know if I…”

Betty leaned in. “Is your goal to hurt Rae?”

“Of course not.”

“All is fair in only two things in life—love and war. This is war. You fight to keep what you love. Make the call, or I will.”

Sarah bit at her bottom lip and picked up the phone. Betty nodded. “Then go see that poor policewoman. Be back for your one o’clock class.”

As Betty stood, she held on to Sarah’s arm. “Please be careful, dear. There’s someone out there who doesn’t like Rae very much.”

“Thanks for reminding me,” she said dryly and dialed the number.

*******

Delia was quietly flipping through a magazine, her leg itching in its cast. Damn, she thought, and tried to wriggle her toes. She looked over and chuckled. There sat Rae, her long legs sprawled out in front of her, sound asleep in the chair. The nurse told her she came in while Delia was sleeping.

She watched her for a moment and smiled at her as she peacefully slept. Her door opened, and Sarah poked her head in.

Delia put her finger up to her lips and motioned to Rae. Sarah shook her head and crept into the room.

“She’s been sleeping for an hour. I don’t have the heart to wake her,” Delia whispered, and Sarah watched Rae.

“The big lug,” Sarah whispered, and Delia stifled a laugh as Rae stirred but still slept.

With that, the door opened, and a nurse cheerfully came in. “Good morning, Detective,” she rang out, and both of them gave her the big “shush.”

She stopped dead in her tracks and noticed the sleeping visitor.

“Hey, who’s the patient here?” she asked and walked up to the bed.

Now Jane opened the door, and all three of them put their fingers to their lips. Jane stopped and noticed Rae; she nodded in acknowledgment and tiptoed up to the bed. She was carrying a bag and a bouquet of flowers.

“For me?” Delia smiled, and Jane nodded, blushing horribly.

The nurse put a thermometer in her mouth, and Delia rolled her eyes. Jane smiled and took her hand.

The nurse glanced at them as she checked Delia’s pulse. “You’d better leave her alone. I’ll never get a good reading,” she said, and Delia turned a nice shade of red, ignoring Jane’s smiling face. “You’re doing just fine. I think you can go home in a day or two,” she said nicely and walked out.

Rae moved in her sleep and woke.

“Good morning,” they all said, and Rae chuckled, rubbing her eyes.

“Sorry,” she said sheepishly as she stretched. “How do you feel?” she asked Delia, who shifted uncomfortably.

“I wanna go home.”

“Stop fussing. The nurse said you can go home in a few days.” Jane smoothed the covers on her bed. “Can I get you anything?”

Delia raised an eyebrow and grinned. Jane blushed as she straightened the newspapers. “A glass of water for a start.”

“Okay, I can see you’re in good hands. I’m going up to see Mark Rhodes. I’ll be back in a bit.” Rae kissed her forehead. She turned to Sarah. “Will you be here?”

“No. I have a full day of classes.” She looked into her eyes.

Rae nodded. “Well, I’ll stop by this evening.”

“I won’t be home tonight. I’ve got dinner plans,” she said, not taking her eyes off her. “If you like, stop by my office tomorrow. I’m free till noon.”

“Oh…okay. I’ll see you in the morning,” Rae offered awkwardly.

Sarah smiled and kissed her cheek. “Please be careful,” she whispered in her ear as she pulled back.

“Of course I will,” Rae assured her. She then turned back to Jane and Delia. “Well, I’ll be back in a few. Take care of this nut, Jane,” she said, smiling, then was gone.

Jane handed Delia the glass of water, and both glanced at Sarah. A frown creased her brow as she folded her arms across her chest; her foot tapped against the tiled floor. She stared out the window.

“Jane, when I get out of here,” Delia started.

Sarah quickly turned to her. “You stay put and let Jane take care of you. You navy women are too damned independent. Who do you think you are that you don’t need someone? You hide behind your uniform. The strong, silent type. When you know that you ache for someone to share your life with,” Sarah said heatedly, and Delia opened her mouth. “Don’t argue with me. You know I’m right.”

Delia closed her mouth and winced. Jane was wide-eyed; she never saw this angry side of Professor Connelly.

“Now shut up and let Jane take care of you. You see how it works? She takes care of you, and you take care of her,” Sarah said with a good deal of sarcasm. “It’s called a relationship... Millions of people do it every day, and for many, it works. It’s even quite enjoyable. If you’re honest and treat the other with respect,” she went on as both of them just gaped at her. She was pacing back and forth, running her fingers through her auburn curls.

“Good Lord, what is the big problem? You love her, she loves you. You fall in love, and you decide to live the rest of your life with the woman you love. Why must it be a big ordeal?” She stopped and picked up her jacket. “I’ve got a class,” she said angrily. “I hope you feel better. So just lay back and enjoy the attention.” She threw the door open and was gone.

Delia and Jane stupidly stared at the door.

“Honestly, I-I was just going to ask you out for coffee when I get out of here,” Delia said slowly.

*******

Rae walked into Mark Rhodes’s room and found him packing his bag; he looked to be in a hurry.

“Been discharged?” Rae leaned against the door.

He shot a look, then took a deep breath. “Yes, and I’m blowing this fucking city. So don’t even try to stop me. I explained it to the cops. I slipped and fell into the lake. You and that other cop were nice enough to haul my ass out. Th-thanks,” he grumbled and threw on his jacket.

“You’re welcome,” Rae said lightly. “Mark, I know Jerry Truman, Mike Porter, and Molly Eastman are somehow involved with Amy’s death. I think you know that, too. If there’s anything you can tell me, please,” she said, and Mark ran his fingers helplessly through his short hair. “They tried to kill you. I think they tried to do the same to my friend. And someone tried to run me and Professor Connelly over last night. Mark, please.” 

“Fuck, will you leave this alone? She’s dead, and nothing will bring her back. Do you honestly think it’s this simple? You get the bad guys and it’s all over? They’re all over the place, like rats.” He fell back into the chair. He buried his head in his trembling hands. Rae felt sorry for this kid as she walked over to him.

“Mark.” She reached for his hand. He pulled back and looked at her.

“I loved her so much. I knew she walked both sides of the street. I knew it, but she loved me, too. I know she did. Then she got mixed up with them, got that stupid tattoo like them, and…belonged to them.” He leaned back, staring at the ceiling.

“Who, Mark? Who?” Rae asked anxiously. She saw him hesitate for a moment.

“No.” He stood abruptly. “I’m leaving this hellhole... Sorry. I want no part of it.” He headed for the door.

“So Amy died for nothing?” Rae called after him.

He stopped and took a deep breath. Saying nothing, he walked out the door.

*******

Sarah sat in her office, staring out the window; this had become a ritual. As her mind wandered all over Rae, she noticed Molly Eastman and Mike Porter. They stood across from the Liberal Arts building. Two or three students wandered over to them. They all exchanged conversation, and there was something else exchanged among them. It took a matter of moments, then they all went their separate ways. Molly and Mike walked back into the building.

If it were any other time, Sarah would have thought nothing of it. However, with all this murder stuff going on, she was extremely suspicious. So she grabbed her coat and walked over to the other building.

It was a cold October day as the wind howled, swirling the leaves around her feet as she mounted the steps. It was three thirty; classes were virtually over as she slowly walked down the hall. She tried to walk softly and winced as the old floor creaked every now and then.

Then she heard them as she came to the end of the hall. She heard Mike Porter’s voice coming from around the corner. She stopped, plastered against the wall, craning to hear him.

“Not a bad afternoon, Truman will be happy. How much have you got left?”

Sarah listened, trying not to make a sound. “Plenty, let’s try the freshmen dorm. Some of them have big exams next week. I know a few that’ll need this,” she said. Sarah heard nothing then but breathing. She frowned and leaned farther.

“There’s no one around. Fuck me now,” she said.

Sarah’s eyes widened, and she whispered, “Oh, please, don’t.”

 Mike laughed. “Geez, you’re like a machine. Don’t you ever get enough?” He gasped aloud. “God, Molly, not here. Wait, wait.”

Sarah heard them shuffling and frantically looked around. She then scurried to the nearest classroom and ducked in, quietly closing the door and locking it. She heard them coming down the hall and squatted down beneath the frosted glass of the door. She looked up as they yanked on the doorknob.

“Shit. It’s locked,” Molly hissed angrily, and they walked away.

Sarah sat there crouched until she no longer heard a thing. She let out a painful groan as she stood, rubbing her back. “I need to get into better shape.” She cautiously opened the door. She looked both ways, satisfied she was completely alone. She scurried down the hall and out the double doors. The cold wind blasted her as she pulled her coat around her neck and walked back to her office.

She dialed Rae’s number and got her voice mail. Not sure of what to say, she just told Rae what she had seen, and for the next hour, she sat there staring at her phone. Rae did not call back. “Damn that woman.”

*******

Sarah sat at the bar, her heart aching and her mind racing. She looked at her watch, Sharon would be here soon. Actually, it would be nice to see her again. Her mind wandered back to their time together.

When she had met Sharon, they were instantly attracted to each other. They had a good deal in common and hit it off well. If Sharon didn’t get that job in California, would they still be together? Sarah thought about it, then Rae Jefferson’s face crowded her thoughts, invading every sense. Sarah sighed helplessly. She was hooked, no doubt about it. No other woman appealed to her. She wanted no one else but that blue-eyed nincompoop....

Then she thought of Sharon. This wasn’t fair to her. She was only seeing her to make Rae jealous. What a stupid high school thing to do, no matter what Betty had said about love and war. “Oh, why do I listen to that crazy woman?” She stood and gathered her coat. She’d call Sharon and explain.

“I’m not that late, am I?” Sharon’s voice came from behind her.

Sarah whirled and laughed nervously. “No, no.”

Sharon leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Good, then let’s get a table. I’m starved.”

Dinner was delightful. They laughed and talked about old times. Every once in a while, there was a comfortable silence between them. Sharon looked across the table through the candlelight and smiled affectionately. Sarah smiled back and sipped her wine.

Sharon reached over and placed her hand on Sarah’s. “I’ve thought about you often. I couldn’t believe my luck when I saw you the other night.” She caressed the back of Sarah’s hand.

“Sharon,” Sarah started.

Sharon cocked her head and smiled. “Sarah,” she countered, and Sarah chuckled but said nothing. Sharon leaned back and smoothed the napkin in her lap. “So which one was it?”

Sarah glanced around, totally confused. “Which one was whom?”

“Who, dear. Heavens, you’ve forgotten your grammar. That will never do. I think you need me in your life, if only for that.” Sharon smiled. “The blonde or the brunette at dinner the other night. Which one has stolen your heart? I say the blonde. She looked a bit miffed when I kissed you.”

Sarah leaned back, as well. She looked at Sharon. “You’re right...the blonde. Rae Jefferson, I met her a week ago.”

“And in love already? That’s you, you impetuous woman,” Sharon scolded. “However, it didn’t take much more time for you and me,” she finished with a trace of sadness.

Sarah winced uncomfortably. This was unfair. “Sharon, I’m sorry.” She then explained why she came to dinner. Sharon listened and raised an eyebrow every now and then. When Sarah finished, she avoided her look, playing with her wineglass.

Sharon smiled grudgingly and sipped her water. “Hmm. Well, one thing I always admired about you was your honesty. So you want to make this sailor jealous?”

Sarah turned bright red. “No, no. I don’t know what I was thinking. I’m so sorry. This was so unfair of me to do to you.”

Sharon hailed the waitress and paid the bill. “C’mon, let me take you home.”

Sarah sighed as they walked out. The short ride home was subdued. As they pulled in front of her house, Sarah noticed Rae’s jeep and let out a helpless groan.

“What’s wrong?” Sharon asked, and Sarah just pointed to the jeep. “Good grief, what is that?” she asked, and Sarah explained. Sharon chuckled as she turned to her. “You love this woman?”

Sarah stared at her hands and only nodded. “Then fight for her. Betty was right.” She opened her door.

They stood by the gate, and Sharon chuckled. “Don’t look now, but your admiral is sitting on your porch.” She pulled a surprised Sarah closer. “Let’s see if it works.” Sharon then proceeded to kiss her, somewhere between a friendly kiss, and…snap! Sharon pulled back and grinned. “See how she fares with that one. Goodbye, Sarah.”

Sarah hugged her fiercely. “Thank you.”

She watched and waved as Sharon pulled away. Letting out a deep sigh, she remembered Rae. She walked up to the porch and gave a surprised look. “Rae, what on earth are you doing here in the dark?”

Rae said nothing, her look spoke volumes. They looked at each other in the darkness for just a moment.

“I got your message and was worried. I can see it didn’t bother you. And I just wanted to fill you in on what’s going on, that’s all. Nothing important. So how was...dinner?” she asked sarcastically.

Sarah hid her smile and walked by her. “Very nice, how was your evening?” she asked over her shoulder as she opened the door. “Coming in or freezing?”

Rae narrowed her eyes at her and followed her in.

“Coffee?” Sarah stifled a yawn.

“Fine, then I’ll be going,” she said in an almost threatening tone.

Sarah chuckled inwardly. “Okay. It’ll be ready in a bit. Have a seat,” she offered, and Rae sat at the kitchen table. “So what do you think of what I saw today?”

“Has to be drugs.” Rae stared out the window into the darkness. “Jane told me about Pam’s spending habits lately. Although she doesn’t want to admit it, my gut says Pam’s involved in this somehow. The furnishings in Amy’s apartment, that’s another thing. Too opulent for a twenty-six-year-old student from a small farming town in Michigan.” She then told Sarah of Mark Rhodes’s hasty retreat. “I need to get to Jerry Truman. I think he’s the leader in this convoluted mess,” she said tiredly and rubbed her neck.

Sarah watched her. Rae looked tired and worn out. “You need to sleep.” She put the cup of coffee in front on her. “Decaf,” she added, and Rae laughed quietly, her blue eyes sparkling now. Sarah’s heart skipped a few beats as she sat.

They sat in silence for a time, drinking coffee, then Rae stood. “Well, thanks for the coffee. Sorry I broke up your evening,” she added with a smug grin.

Sarah shot a look up at her smirking face. “You didn’t. It was an enjoyable evening. Sharon is a good woman. She’s thinking of taking a position at Chicago University. There’s an opening in the English Department.”

Rae’s smirk turned to a dark look. “Well, I hope you two will be very happy,” she said stupidly.

“Oh, don’t be an ass.” Sarah took the cups off the table. “She’s an old friend.”

Rae grunted rudely. “Yes, and all my old friends kiss me like that.”

Sarah whirled around. “What does it matter to you? You-you, lone wolf!” she exclaimed angrily.

Rae took a step toward her and stopped. “I’m leaving!” she barked and picked up her keys.

“Good. Good night!” Sarah barked back, angrily brushing the curl off her forehead.

“Fine. I’ll let myself out,” Rae growled and walked out of the kitchen.

Sarah followed her as the swinging kitchen door almost hit her in the face. She angrily pushed it open. “Fine. And don’t you dare slam that door!” Sarah yelled.

Rae turned and smiled sweetly. She then walked out, furiously slamming the door, knocking the small picture off the wall.

Chapter 28

Rae jumped sky-high as the phone rang. “H’lo,” she said thickly. She looked at her clock—three thirty. She actually was sleeping.

“Rae. It’s Pam. I’m in trouble. I need your help, please. I’m in Evanston by the university.” She sounded extremely anxious as she told Rae exactly where she was.

“I know where it is, by the beach. I’ll be there as soon as I can, stay put.” Rae threw down the phone. Disoriented, she put on some clothes and grabbed her keys.

She drove through the city and headed toward Sheridan Road. “God, what’s she doing all the way in Evanston? It’ll take me a good twenty minutes.” She yawned and put her foot to the pedal.

As she drove the dark street, she looked to her right, knowing Lake Michigan was right there, but on a dark moonless night, she couldn’t see a thing. The road started its familiar downward winding, and Rae instinctively put her foot to the brake.

To her horror, her foot went all the way to the floor, and the jeep didn’t slow down. She downshifted, but the jeep still picked up speed as it headed down the spiraling road.

“Fuck me,” she hissed as she furiously shifted and pumped the brakes.

She knew what was coming—the sharp curve that led to the beach. She knew her jeep would never make that curve at this speed. She quickly looked to her right, searching for the entrance to the beach. Frantically, she tried to remember if there was an embankment.

She had no choice. She veered right, and as she reached for the emergency brake, her jeep lurched over the small cement speed bumps. Her head hit the top of the jeep as she desperately tried to regain control of the wheel. It was no use, the jeep careened out of control as she flew through the parking lot and headed headlong out onto the beach. Once the jeep hit the sandy beach, it seemed to slow down, but she still couldn’t stop or control it. She unbuckled her seat belt, threw open the door, and jumped out just as her jeep flew over a sandy embankment and crashed onto the beach, rolling until it finally stopped at the shoreline.

Rae flew through the air, landing on the cold, hard sand, rolling ass over end, like the jeep. She finally stopped rolling and lay there, staring at the stars. Her entire body ached as she lifted her head.

“Crap.” She groaned as she tried to stand. Within a moment or two, she heard the sirens and saw the flashing lights.

“Ah, the cavalry,” she said and promptly passed out.

*******

She opened her eyes painfully and looked around. It was an emergency room, she figured. Then she cautiously threw her legs over the side of the gurney and sat up. Blinking, she looked down at herself. Her clothes were dirty and full of sand as she put a shaky hand to her head.

“Welcome back.”

Rae glanced up to see a doctor walking over to her. “I know this is a stupid question, but where am I?”

The young man smiled and stood in front of her. He took a small flashlight and made a couple of passes from one eye to the other.

“St. Francis Hospital. You had a little accident. How do you feel?”

“Like my jeep,” she said rudely, and he chuckled.

“Well, you seem coherent enough. X-rays were negative. Nothing broken, you’re lucky. There was an eyewitness who heard the squealing tires and saw the whole thing. The, uh, police would like to ask you a few questions. I’ll give you a minute.”

Rae nodded, then searched for her cell phone. Luckily, it was still in her pocket and working. She called McGrath, who assured her he would call the chief of police in Evanston.

“He’s an old buddy. You stay put, and I’ll be there in twenty minutes. You will then fill me in on everything.”

“Yes, Lieutenant, I promise.” She sighed and lay back. Nothing broken, just bruised beyond all belief.

A few minutes later, the young doctor pulled the screen back and smiled. “You must know someone. The chief of police is here.”

Rae groaned and pulled the sheet over her head. The doctor laughed quietly. “I could try to hold him off awhile longer.”

Rae waved him off. She sat up and flexed her, well, everything. “I’m fine, Doctor. Trust me, I’ve been through worse,” she assured him.

He gave her a suspicious glance but said nothing. “I’d like to keep you overnight.”

“Nope. Thanks, I’m fine.”

“I had a feeling you’d say that.” He then shrugged and handed her a clipboard and pen. “Refusal of services. In other words…”

“Covering your ass, I understand,” Rae said tiredly and signed the papers.

He scribbled a prescription and handed it to her. “You’ll be sore later.”

With that, a short, stout man pulled the curtain back and stood there.

“Miss Jefferson. Chief Desmond. You know McGrath in Chicago, you’re lucky. I’m not fond of people destroying public property in the middle of the night. What’s your story?”

As Rae opened her mouth to explain, a voice came from beyond the curtain.

“Hold on, Tom.”

Rae closed her mouth and looked under the gurney. The doctor chuckled at her antics, as McGrath pulled the curtain back.

“Well, I’ll leave you alone,” the doctor said and turned, bumping into McGrath.

Now Rae chuckled quietly. Christ, what a night, she thought as her head started to ache.

He gave Rae an exasperated look as he shook hands with Chief Desmond. “Got a live one here, eh, Tom?”

Rae rolled her eyes as the two old men exchanged smug grins. “I don’t know. She looks dangerous.”

“Psycho.” McGrath winked and touched his temple.

“Okay, okay.” Rae rubbed her forehead and proceeded to tell them the entire story.

After a few minutes, they exchanged glances. Rae looked back and forth and blinked several times. “So that’s it. I don’t have any proof or any evidence.”

“Did you get a license plate number from the car in the alley?” Desmond asked. Rae shook her head. He stood and scratched his head. “Well, she’s all yours. Your car unfortunately was towed. I don’t think you’ll be driving it anywhere.”

Rae then had an idea. “Chief, can you check and see if the brake lines have been tampered with?”

He thought for a moment and nodded. “I can do that. If what you say is true... However, that’s an old jeep.” He shrugged and shook McGrath’s hand. They mumbled something back and forth, then he was gone.

“Well, Rae. Let’s get you home,” he said. “Before a house falls on you,” he added fatherly and ushered her out the door.

*******

Rae took a long hot bath as the sun rose, shining in her bathroom. “God, I’m tired.” She sighed. Everything ached, even her eyelids. However, now the police were involved. McGrath said he would find Pam and have a discussion with her. Though he couldn’t promise anything, he would also talk to Mike Porter, Molly Eastman, and Jerry Truman. Rae only hoped that McGrath took her seriously. Her gut told her that all of them had something going on—drugs more than likely.

Now this with Pam. Instinctively, she knew that Pam was in deep, whatever it was. It was just too coincidental that she called, and Rae’s brakes failed... Much too coincidental.

She hauled her aching body out of the tub and struggled into her robe. It was five thirty, and she knew sleep was impossible. So she put on the coffee and took Mike Porter’s file. She sat in the big chair by the fire and opened the file.

“You’re haunting me, Mike Porter. What is the connection?” She sighed as she flipped through the pages of his file.

She read his application. It was standard stuff. However, because of the nature of ComTele, it was a bit more in-depth. “Age, 22. Birthplace, Chicago. Parents, Don Porter and Mary Billings, both born in Chicago. Education: 3rd year Liberal Arts, Northwestern.” She rubbed her eyes and tossed the file down. “Standard crap,” she grumbled.

She then thought of Jane and dialed her number. She heard her sleepy voice on the other end, and after a brief overview, she was wide awake.

“Does Pam have a key to your apartment?” Rae asked, and Jane assured her she did not. “Okay. Get dressed and wait for me. Hell, I don’t have a car. Okay, I’ll take a cab. You stay put until I get there. You’re going to spend the day with the professor at the hospital where I can keep an eye on all of you.” She rang off, then dialed Sarah.

Sarah’s schedule was virtually free, and she agreed to stay with Jane at the hospital. Rae neglected to tell her about the evening’s events. Sarah was giving Rae a cool reception as it was. As long as Sarah was safe, Rae could stand the cold.

*******

It was eight thirty as Jane pulled up to Sarah’s house. Sarah met her at the walk, and Rae opened the door.

“Where’s your contraption?” she asked a bit coolly, trying to ignore Rae’s tired, worn face. She noticed Rae wince as she got out of the car. Rae in turn ignored her question.

“Good morning to you, too,” she said. As long as Sarah was angry, she wouldn’t worry, Rae thought, hoping that was true.

“Good morning...Jane,” Sarah said, and Rae just looked out the window. Jane glanced in the rearview mirror.

“Good morning, Professor Connelly,” she said obediently as she drove. She was no Einstein, but she could cut the tension between them with a knife.

Delia was finishing breakfast as the trio walked in. She smiled broadly and pushed her tray away. “Hey. Three good-looking women. How lucky can a cop get?” Her smile faded as she saw Rae’s tired face.

“Okay, what’s up?” She tried to sit up. Jane put a pillow behind her head, and Sarah walked over to her and kissed her forehead.

“Jane will fill you in. I’ve got to go check in with my client before they fire me. Then I have to see McGrath,” Rae said, and Jane tossed her the car keys. Rae plucked them out of the air. She glanced at Sarah, who gave her an icy look.

“I’ll check in later this afternoon. Then we’ll go from there,” Rae said firmly, and Sarah put her hands on her hips in a defiant pose. Rae hung her head and rubbed her eyes.

“Sarah, please, don’t fight me now. You can be pissed at me all you want when this is over. Just please do as I ask for now.”

It was not a question.

“Fine,” she said and turned from her. Rae sighed and walked out the door.

Delia looked at Jane. “Okay, what’s going on?”

Jane took a deep, sad breath and retold the story of the previous night. Sarah listened, then whirled around and gaped at Jane.

Delia’s frown deepened as she shifted uncomfortably in her bed. “Damn it. I need to get out of here. Well, at least she’ll be with McGrath.”

Sarah looked out the window again, her heart racing at the thought of Rae out there alone. The lone wolf, she thought sadly. Now she felt a wave of guilt as Jane finished.

“So Rae didn’t say, but I know she thinks Pam’s involved.”

Delia awkwardly reached out her hand and held on to Jane’s. “Let’s just wait and see what they find on Rae’s jeep. It could just be a horrible accident. It is an old jeep.” Her voice trailed off, and Sarah turned to them.

“No, Rae’s instincts are right, I’m sure. They’ll find that someone cut the brake lines, and Pam unfortunately is involved with whatever this is. I’m sorry, Jane.” She walked over to Jane and put her arm around her.

“What does all this have to do with Amy’s death? What’s going on?” she asked anxiously, then put a trembling hand over her eyes.

Delia and Sarah exchanged a knowing look. Delia hoped they’d find Pam, and all this would be over.

They were about to find out that nothing was further from the truth.

Chapter 29

Rae pulled into ComTele and waved at Jim as she passed. She walked into the building and up to the receptionist, who smiled. “Miss Jefferson, we haven’t seen you in a couple of days.” She pinned a visitor tag on her coat.

“Been a bit busy. Are the board members in?” she asked, and Susan rolled her eyes.

“They’re in a meeting with some pharmaceutical company. I’m not sure how long they’ll be.”

Rae shrugged. “I’ll just grab a cup of coffee and take a look around. My contractors were supposed to be here.”

“Go ahead. If anyone has clearance, it’s you.”

Rae walked down the long hall and took the elevator to the third floor. As the elevator started, she looked up.

“Good,” she said approvingly. The contractors had already installed the first part of the security—the cameras.

As the elevator doors opened, she wandered down the hall. There were workers everywhere. Electricians, contractors, all busy rewiring the circuits. A tall young man smiled and waved her over.

“Ed, everything shaping up?”

He nodded and looked around. “All on schedule. We already installed the cameras in the elevators. Even got video of the past few days.” He leaned in. “Didn’t tell anybody yet, so we might get some interesting videos. Know what I mean?” He rolled his eyes and smiled wickedly.

Rae gave him an exasperated look. “Ed, I want to keep this contract. Please, no porn on video, okay?”

“Spoilsport.” He chuckled and got back to work.

Rae took the elevator back down to the first floor and headed toward the security office.

Two men sat there, testing the equipment. Three monitors gave a good view of each floor. They both looked up and smiled.

“Hey, Rae... High-tech stuff going on here.”

Rae laughed and hit a few strokes of the keyboard. The screen scrambled and showed the view of the elevator. Then she looked at the view of the parking lot. “This is good, guys. How soon before you’re up to a hundred percent?”

“Well, we’ve already got video. It’s been running for three days. I suppose we should have told the board.”

Rae sighed. “Yes, Ed told me. It would be a good idea to let the owners know they’re being videotaped. Where is it?”

He blushed and pulled it out of the recorder and gave her a shamefaced look as he handed her the tape.

Rae gave them a suspicious look. Both put their hands up. “Haven’t even touched it in three days,” he assured her, and Rae grunted as she wagged it at them in motherly fashion.

“Do not put another tape in until I clear it with the gods above.” She placed the videotape in her coat pocket and patted it.

He raised his hand. “Scouts’ honor.”  

After a couple of hours, she was satisfied with the progress and told Susan to let Ellsworth, Billings, Rosen, and... “Who’s the other guy? I always forget him,” she said, and Susan laughed.

“Woodard.”

Rae snapped her fingers. “Woodard. Tell them I’ll stop by in a day or two. They can call if there’s a problem.”

*******

McGrath sat behind his desk, looking at the scenario from Rae. He had sent a detective over to Pam Rodriguez’s apartment and bookstore. Two were sent to the university to find the whereabouts of Porter, Eastman, and Truman. From all that Rae and Sarah had told him, it would appear that they were dealing at the university. However, he needed more than this to go on.

“What a racket. If we can prove it,” he mumbled and tossed down his pen.

“You look like hell,” Rae’s voice called out. He looked up to see her leaning against his door.

“You don’t look much better. How do you feel?” He motioned her into the room. He didn’t wait for an answer. “I sent a few guys over to find our little playmates. We have one big problem. No evidence, only your word. As I told you before, all you’ve explained to me can be easily dismissed without it. I need something before I go to the captain.”

Rae sighed and stretched out her long legs. “Shit,” she said rudely, and McGrath laughed.

“No argument there.” He then leaned in. “You must have something. Anything at all,” he asked hopefully.

“There’s got to be a connection between ComTele and this mess. I can feel it,” she said angrily and started pacing back and forth.

McGrath poured a cup of coffee and thrust it at her. She took it and continued pacing, absently pulling at her eyebrow and frowning.

He watched her and smiled. She’d make a good cop, he thought. “Sit down, before you wear a path in my floor,” he said. Rae sat and drank her coffee. He smiled fondly at this woman.

“You could have been seriously hurt last night, young lady,” he scolded.

“You sound like my father,” Rae accused and smiled.

“If I were related to you…” he started and stopped as Rae shot him a curious look.

“What did you say?”

Rae paced, her mind racing. He gave her a skeptical look. “I said if I were related to you.” McGrath just let her go and waited. She stopped dead in her tracks and rubbed her forehead.

“Mike Porter. Porter, Billings.” Her mind raced, trying to make the curious connection. Then it hit her. “It can’t be,” she said in awe. “Okay. Stay with me.”

McGrath said nothing but leaned forward and listened.

“Mike Porter works part time at ComTele. I was reading his application, and his mother’s name is Mary Billings.”

“So,” McGrath said.

“So. One of the members of the board of directors at ComTele is Arthur M. Billings,” Rae said, and his eyes lit up for a moment as he grabbed the phone.

“Check one Arthur M. Billings, ComTele Industries, here in Chicago. I want everything, including family members, and I need it now.” He put the phone down and rubbed his hands together. “A long shot,” he warned.

“Maybe. And maybe not. ComTele has just gotten federal funding for medical research, hence the reason for the security system. This morning, they were in a meeting with a pharmaceutical company.”

“You’re reaching, I’m afraid. Either that, or you’re psychic.” He scratched his head. “But I believe everything else. Your professor sees these two with students the other day. Ordinarily, no big deal. But put it all together with everything that’s been happening to you... Damn, we need something to go on,” he said helplessly. “If this Porter kid is related to Billings, and if we had some hard evidence on the two of them…”

Then another idea raced through her mind. Rae pulled a videotape out of her coat pocket and looked at it. “Even though we’re in the digital age, I’m glad I still make a videotape as a backup. Here’s three days of surveillance at ComTele.” She shrugged.

McGrath snorted. “What are the odds of something being on that tape?”

Rae shrugged and smiled wickedly, waving the tape. He grabbed it from her and walked out into the precinct office and over to a television.

They sat there for a moment while McGrath put on his glasses, studying the remote. Rae waited patiently, wanting to rip it out of his hands. “My wife never lets me play with these things.”

“It’s a guy thing. May I?” Rae asked patiently and snatched it out of his hands.

They both watched. Not much was on there. Just employees riding the elevator. She sighed impatiently and fast-forwarded over the empty timeframe. She stopped when the video showed several people taking the elevator at various times. No one she recognized. “Shit,” she mumbled and continued.

“I’m afraid this is a dead end,” he started and stopped when he realized Rae wasn’t listening. She was staring at the screen. He looked and noticed an old man in the elevator.

“Someone you know?” he asked hopefully.

“Mr. Arthur M. Billings,” she said as they watched.

Mr. Billings nervously paced back and forth in the elevator as he mopped his brow. The elevator doors opened, and he started to leave, then backed up and put up his hands. With that, two arms reached in and pulled him out. That was it.

“Hmm.” McGrath whistled. Rae stared at the video, wishing for audio.

“It’s not evidence, could have been over anything,” he said a bit dejected.

Just then, a young woman came up to him with a manila envelope. He took it and motioned Rae back into his office. Rae took the tape out and followed.

McGrath read the contents and raised an eyebrow, then handed it to Rae. She read it and looked up. “His nephew, I knew it. Now what’s the correlation between them and Amy Davis?”

“Drugs,” he said pointedly as he snapped his fingers. Rae watched him as he walked over to the file cabinet and took out a folder. “Amy Davis’s file.” He leafed through it. He stopped and smiled slightly as he slid it over to Rae.

He pointed to a section of the autopsy report. Rae read it twice. This was not in the report that Delia had shown her at breakfast the other day.

“A drug or substance of unknown origin, more than likely an amphetamine. Further tests can be administered.” She looked up at McGrath. “I’m assuming this is not the traces of cocaine that were found?”

“Correct.”

“Were there further tests done?” she asked anxiously.

“Nope. Guess who convinced her parents not to?” He smiled as if he just swallowed the canary.

“Pam Rodriguez.” Rae stared at the report.

“Yep. Read farther down. Detective Halloran was on this one.”

Rae read his short report.

I advised them to go on. However, it was already determined an accident and the case closed. Ms. Rodriguez told them it was over, an accident. Why let them destroy her body any further? I couldn’t force them, it was already over.

Rae looked up at him, and he nodded as if reading her mind.

“We need to find these people.” He looked at his door, and two detectives stood there, shaking their heads.

“Jerry Truman hasn’t been seen for three days. Mike Porter and Molly Eastman were no-shows at the university. Pam Rodriquez is MIA. Her store is locked up.”

“Damn it,” McGrath cursed and slammed his desk. “Well, what are you standing around for? Get back out there and find them!”

They turned and walked out. Rae rubbed her tired eyes. This was going no place very quickly. She had a bad feeling that something was going to happen soon. Then she had an idea.

“Lieutenant, no one knows what’s on this tape or that it even exists, for that matter.”

“Your point, I’m afraid to ask?” he asked cautiously.

Rae paced, then smiled at him. “I think a visit to ComTele would be in order.”

“I’ll go with you,” he said firmly, and Rae shook her head.

“No, listen. So far, we have no hard evidence. Now here’s my plan.”

McGrath winced. He was beginning to get a bad feeling about this, a very bad feeling.

Chapter 30

“Gin!” Jane exclaimed happily as she set the cards on the table.

“That’s three hands in a row. I think you’re cheating,” Sarah scolded and tossed down her cards. She then looked at her watch—almost two o’clock. Delia was sound asleep, and Sarah motioned to Jane.

“Let’s go down to the cafeteria, I’m starved.”

Jane agreed and walked over to Delia and kissed her forehead. Her eyes opened, and she smiled sleepily. “Hey,” she whispered.

“Hey yourself. The professor and I are going to get a bite to eat. We’ll be right back.”

“Don’t leave the hospital. Rae should be checking in soon.” She yawned and faded off again.

Jane stood there for an instant, watching her. Sarah walked up behind her. “C’mon, sweetie, let her sleep.”

*******

“Cafeteria food leaves lots to be desired,” Sarah announced and tossed down the sandwich. Jane laughed and excused herself. Sarah looked up. “I don’t blame you, my stomach is grumbling.”

Jane headed down the corridor to the restrooms.

“Keep walking, Jane,” a voice whispered behind her.

She turned to see Mike Porter, white-faced and perspiring, looking around the hall. “Mike...what on earth?”

“Don’t talk. C’mon move, Jane.”

They walked quickly out the nearest door, then down the path to the parking lot and over to the red sedan.

“Okay, Jane, drive,” he hissed. Jane complied and pulled away.

“Mike, please, what are you doing? This is insane. Where did you get a gun?”

He laughed sadly. “That is the least of my worries.”

Jane glanced at him as she drove. “Whatever you’re in to, this is no way to get out of it. Surely, something can be done.”

“Nothing can be done!” he yelled helplessly. He was shaking as if he were sick.

“What’s the matter with you?” Jane tried to concentrate on the road. He wiped the sweat off his brow.

“The same thing that’s wrong with Pam. He got us all. Well, all except poor Amy.” He gave a dejected chuckle. “She’s better off. We’re still here in this shithole,” he yelled and hit his fist on the dashboard. Jane flinched and watched the road. His hands were shaking so badly Jane thought the gun would go off.

“Just drive, Jane. Just drive.” He sighed as the tears rolled down his face.

*******

Sarah searched everywhere. Jane was nowhere. She asked everyone and anyone, and no one saw her. It was as though she vanished in thin air.

Frantically, she ran up to Delia’s room, praying that Jane would be there. She walked in. Delia smiled, then looked beyond her.

“Where’s Jane?”

Sarah put a shaky hand to her forehead and explained. Delia was reaching for the phone, and Sarah rushed over and handed it to her.

“Delia, I’m sorry. I don’t know where in the world she could have gotten to,” Sarah said. Delia waved her off.

“It’s not your fault. She’s got to be someplace. Maybe she went to the gift shop or something.”

Sarah shook her head. “I checked everywhere. She was just going to the bathroom.”

Delia dialed Rae’s number and got voice mail. “Shit,” she cursed and left a quick message to call.

With that, Rae came through the door. Sarah flew to her and wrapped her arms around her neck.

“What the hell’s wrong?”

Sarah pulled back and let her go. She wiped her eyes and walked back into the room, saying nothing. Delia explained, and Rae sighed helplessly. She then walked up behind Sarah and put her hands on her shoulders.

“It’s not your fault. We’ll find her. She’s probably buying more flowers for Delia.” She kissed her head.

Sarah laughed and patted her hand but walked away from her. Rae frowned for an instant, completely aware of the cool distance between them. However, right now, she had more on her mind.

Delia was already on the phone with the precinct.

“Delia, have them look for the red sedan. You never know, let’s keep all bases covered,” Rae said with cool authority. Sarah watched her; she seemed detached and all business. “They can patrol the area of the hospital, Pam’s bookstore, and Jane’s apartment.”

“Call McGrath and keep me posted, Dan.” Delia nodded to Rae. She put the phone down and stared at it.

Rae walked up to her and kissed the top of her head. “We’ll find her,” she promised, and Delia only nodded as she fought back her tears.

Sarah sat with a dejected sigh but said nothing.

Rae told them of the morning’s activities, and both listened. Delia was amazed. “Holy shit. That’s all that was on the tape? Now what?”

“Here’s the plan. I’m going back to ComTele and have a discussion with Mr. Billings if he’s in. Then I’ll stop by The Snake Pit and spread the word that I have a certain video from ComTele. I’m going home to wait. McGrath will be skulking about. Hopefully, someone will take the bait.” She shrugged.

Sarah listened in horror. “Why you? Why can’t the police tell Mr. Billings about the tape?”

“They’re already hiding like rats. If the police show their face, we’ll never get them out. They have to think I’m acting on my own. Look, I don’t think Delia’s hit-and-run was an accident. I think everything that has happened to all of us has been done to scare me away. Now Jane...” Her voice trailed off as she tiredly sat.

Sarah watched her; she looked tired and worn. Trying to figure this out, Rae took all of it on her shoulders.

“There’s got to be another way. Why do you have to put yourself in harm’s way? Why?” Sarah asked anxiously. Rae took a deep breath.

“Sarah—”

“This will not bring that young SEAL back,” she said evenly, immediately wanting the words back.

Rae shot her a dark angry look. She started to say something, then stopped and took another deep breath and stood. “Stay here with Delia. McGrath will call in later,” she said angrily and walked out.

Delia was giving Sarah the eye, and Sarah knew it. She glanced her way and sat.

“Not your best moment,” she said firmly.

Sarah put her head back and closed her eyes. She agreed. It was not. She should never have said that to Rae. She then stared out the window to see Rae making her way down the walk all alone. She promptly buried her face in her hands and wept.

*******

Mr. Billings was sitting behind his desk staring out the window. He saw Rae Jefferson jogging to the door and let out a long, forlorn sigh. Within a moment, his phone rang, and Rae was on her way up.

“Come in, Miss Jefferson,” he said tiredly.

“Good afternoon,” Rae said as he offered the chair in front of his desk.

“How is the security system going? I see all your men. They seem to be doing a good job.” He tried to smile. Rae noticed the beads of perspiration break out on his brow, and she felt sorry for him.

“Everything is going fine. Our men had a surveillance tape in for the past three days. No one but me has seen it. I thought I would let you know.” She walked over to his television. “May I?”

“Certainly,” he said with a trace of dejection. Actually, he felt relieved as she started the recorder. “This is the only part I’m concerned with, sir,” she said, and he watched the video. Rae then turned it off and took the tape out.

“I’m just wondering what was wrong there, Mr. Billings. You looked very frightened,” Rae said as she sat.

Mr. Billings took a deep, sad breath. “Nothing, just a disagreement with...”

“Your nephew Mike Porter?”

“How…?” He shot her a look of disbelief. “The employee files,” he said as he remembered.

“Yes, sir, the files you were hesitant to give me. I can tell by looking at you, something is wrong. There’s a world of shit going on with your nephew and some of his associates. A young woman was killed. I’m afraid your nephew is involved. If you know anything...”

He looked at her. “I’m afraid I can’t help you there. I don’t know anything.”

Rae knew he was lying. Mr. Billings knew she knew he was lying. However, there was too much at stake.

“Mr. Billings, please. If you cooperate, it’s not too late.”

He was staring at his desk and breathing heavily. “Oh, I’m afraid it’s much later than you think.”

“Are you being blackmailed?” she asked, and he shot her a look of horror as he looked around.

“You have no idea what you’re getting into. Leave it alone, please.”

Rae watched him as he took out a handkerchief and mopped his face. He stood and paced by the big window as Rae sat there, silent.

“This is all about that young woman, isn’t it?” he asked as he stared out the window.

“Yes. Somebody killed that poor girl. She was thrown into the Chicago River while she was still alive. She died a horrible, lonely death. I mean to find out why.”

“Why aren’t the police here?”

“Because it was determined an accident.”

“But you don’t believe it. When I first met you, I liked you. You had spunk. I liked that. Now you’ve gotten yourself in the middle of a nightmare.”

“Tell me...please.”

He turned to her, and Rae could see tears glistening in his eyes. “You realize that this tape means nothing.”

Rae nodded sadly in agreement. He smiled, as well, and sat. “Our mistakes always haunt us. Always.”

Rae chuckled sadly. “I know what you mean. Trust me. But if you let me help, it just might be easier to sleep at night.” She immediately thought of Sarah.

“I’ve been married for twenty-seven years. Never strayed. Went to work, went home. However, I made a fateful mistake. I helped a young woman, and now I’m paying for it. But you’re right, enough is enough. I can’t do this anymore. That poor girl was killed.” He took a deep breath. “About seven months ago, I went to dinner with my nephew after work. Toward the end, a young woman came up to the table. She knew Mike. He invited her to stay, and I will tell you, she was attractive. You may know her. Molly Eastman. She flirted shamelessly, and I acted like an old fool, feeling young and wanting.” He ran a tired hand across his face, then he stood and shook his head.

“I still don’t remember going back to her apartment. I don’t remember drinking that much, and I don’t remember sleeping with her. God help me, I don’t remember,” he said frantically and paced back and forth. Rae listened, beginning to understand the situation. She knew how he felt. She did the same with Amy...

“Amy,” she said out loud. Her mind now raced, trying to remember their night together. Rae didn’t recall much, either. When Amy was leaving the next morning. What did she say?

“I’ve got to change plans. I was supposed to do something, but now... I just can’t.” Her words now rang in Rae’s ears. She then shook herself and concentrated on Mr. Billings.

“I just don’t remember,” he said sadly. “In any event, when I awoke the next morning, I was in bed, and this woman was lying next to me. I was shocked to say the least. Then all hell broke loose. The front door burst open, and Mike walked in, ranting and raving, calling Molly every name in the book, threatening her and me. It was horrible. He threatened to tell my wife and the entire family. He threatened to tell the board of directors. This Molly creature said I was divulging company secrets about the research being done.” He looked at Rae.

“I swear to you, I have no recollection of doing any of that. I was helpless. I pleaded with him, but it was no use. The only way to keep it quiet was to do as he wished.”

“So they blackmailed you. How?”

“I gave him clearance to be in the research department. He took the drugs, and I turned my back. I didn’t know what he was taking, and I suppose I didn’t want to know. Not until I found he was taking the research drugs.”

Rae shot him a curious look. “Research?”

He nodded. “We’ve received funding from the government to do research on a drug for the Armed Forces. They wanted to examine the possibility of finding something that will aid fighter pilots during long missions. It’s experimental; there’s been no testing at all. I personally thought it was a waste of money, but you know how the government is.”

Rae chuckled sadly. “Yes, I do. So now we come to the video. What did you do? Tell him you were through?”

“Yes, I had called him and told him just that. He threatened to tell the family and the board. I told him I was going to do that myself. That was the other day. What you saw in that video was my wonderful bastard of a nephew and some redheaded idiot dragging me off the elevator. I was on my way to the other members of the board. The redhead threatened my family. I must admit, even Mike disagreed with him on that, but it was too late. I’ve been trying to figure out what to do for the past twenty-four hours.”

He gave Rae a shamed look. “I know you think I’m a coward and a philanderer. Perhaps I am.”

“No, sir, I don’t. You were just trying to protect your family as best you could. However, you’re in a good deal of danger right now.” She took out her cell phone and dialed McGrath.

He would have a patrol car come and get Mr. Billings and take him home and stay with his family. “Good work, Rae. You should have been a cop. We’re still looking for these guys. I’m trying to get a search warrant for The Snake Pit. With this, maybe I can. We’ve had no luck finding Ms. Whiting. Hell, we can’t find anybody. You get back to the hospital. You’ve done enough.”

“No, I haven’t. Not until we find Jane. Look, I’m going over to The Snake Pit as planned.” She hung up just as she heard McGrath bark his order.

*******

The cold wind whipped around her as she pulled her collar up around her neck. It was only seven thirty, and The Snake Pit was virtually empty, except for a couple at the bar, as Rae walked in and sat. The bartender saw her, and his eyes widened.

“Surprised?” Rae asked boldly. He swallowed with difficulty, but he said nothing. “Gin and tonic.”

He brought the drink back, and Rae looked at it. With all the drug talk going on, she pushed it aside. Color her paranoid, she didn’t care right now. She sighed and smiled at the bartender. “How’s business?” she asked affably.

He frowned cautiously. “Fine.”

“Wonderful, make it last. Tell the powers that be I know what’s going on. Tell them they should have smiled for the camera.”

She stood and tossed a few dollars on the bar and walked out.

As Rae walked back to her car, she felt someone behind her. Someone then grabbed her, pushed her into the alley, and slammed her face first into the wall. She let out a grunt as her attacker had her pinned. She couldn’t see who it was as she frantically tried to free herself. “Well, this was quick. I thought I’d at least get home.”

“So smart, so fucking smart,” a man’s voice whispered in her ear. “This is so not your day.”

Chapter 31

Delia watched Sarah pace back and forth. “Sit. You’re making me dizzy.”

Sarah smiled and sat, staring out the window. “Where are they?” she asked absently. Then she glanced at Delia, who was shifting in the bed, trying to get up.

Sarah watched her struggling and gave her an exasperated look.  “What are you doing?” she asked dryly.

“Trying to get out of this fucking bed,” she cursed loudly, then grunted and lay back. “Fuck me.” She sighed unhappily.

“And how far do you think you’ll get with your leg in a cast?” Sarah asked with a trace of sarcasm.

Delia glared at her. “I don’t like you right now,” she said frankly, and Sarah chuckled, looking out the window.

With that, McGrath walked in. “Detective Grainger, how are you feeling?” He tried to keep things light. “Professor, how are you?”

“Cut the small talk,” Sarah said with uncharacteristic rudeness. Delia raised her eyebrows and hid her grin. McGrath smiled and chomped on his cigar. “Please,” she corrected herself.

“Okay,” he said affably. He then told them the new developments. Both were amazed as they listened.

“My guess and Rae’s is that someone has Jane as a safeguard. We think she’s unharmed, but we don’t have any way of knowing that.”

“One girl has been murdered,” Sarah reminded him.

“I know, but I don’t think they want to do the same to Jane,” Delia interrupted her.

McGrath concurred. “I’m waiting on the search warrant for The Snake Pit. Rae seems to think it’s ‘where the rats live.’”

Sarah gave him a curious look. “Where is Rae now?”

He cleared his throat. “I was hoping she’d be here by now. She…” He didn’t finish. Sarah knew. So did Delia.

“She went to that place. Alone,” Sarah said evenly.

“I think she may have, which is why I’m going over there as soon—” He was interrupted by his cell phone. After a brief exchange, he hung up. “We got a search warrant. You two stay put. I’ve got a man outside the door.”

“I’m going with you,” Sarah said firmly. He gave her a fatherly look.

“You have to stay here. I can’t allow you to go. She’ll be fine. That woman has nine lives.” He walked out.

“If anything happens to her, I’ll kill her,” Sarah said, trying to keep her tears from flowing down her face.

Chapter 32

“Let’s go.” Truman held the gun to Rae’s back.

“Don’t get nervous, Truman,” she said as he pushed her into the alley and in the same back entrance of the bar.

Truman flipped on the light and shoved her to the table. “Sit and shut the fuck up.”

“Which one first?” Rae asked.

Truman’s face turned as red as his hair as he raised the gun. Then he laughed. “I say sit first.”

Rae cautiously sat and took in her surroundings. They seemed to be alone, though Rae couldn’t see past the light, which hung over the table.                        

“Okay, enough playing…”

“Were we playing?”

“I hear you have something, probably a video. I told Porter to keep an eye out, but he’s been a bit preoccupied.” He walked over to the hidden door, pushing it open.

Out came Mike, dragging Jane. Her blouse was ripped slightly, and Rae looked at her face. She nodded as if telling Rae she was fine.

“Don’t worry. Nothing’s happened to her yet. Now where’s the tape?”

Rae was still looking at Jane; her hands were tied behind her as Mike dumped her into a chair across from Rae, who winked and nodded to her. Jane smiled, but Rae could tell she was scared to death.

Mike, on the other hand, looked completely frazzled. His pupils were nonexistent. He was constantly licking his lips and trembling. “C’mon, let’s get this over with,” he said helplessly as he hugged himself.

“Shut up. You’ll get your fix,” Truman assured him and waved him off. He turned to Rae. “Now once again, where is it?”

“It’s far beyond a videotape. However, it’s very interesting.”

Mike gave her a suspicious look, trying to gauge her answers. “Damn it, I knew it. I knew they caught us on tape. I told you never to come to ComTele. But no, you had to come. Now they’ve got us selling the shit on tape. That asshole from accounting. I knew we shouldn’t have done it in the elevator,” Mike blurted out, and Rae shot him an incredulous look.

Truman shook his head and looked to the ceiling. “She hasn’t got that on video. It happened two weeks ago. If you were doing your part, you would know that. You stupid, stupid fuck!” he bellowed, and Mike took a protective step back. Truman calmed down and took a deep breath. “But she knows now, moron,” he assured him.

Then he turned his attention back to Rae. “Now what is on your tape?” Rae hesitated for a moment. He then slapped her in the face.

The pain shot through Rae’s face; the force of the blow nearly knocked her off the chair.

“You took too long,” he said simply.

“Let Jane go.”

“I’m thinking...no.”

“Let her go, and I’ll take you to it.”

Mike stood nearly on top of Rae, looming over her. “Goddamn you, tell him! Tell him!”

“Now, now.” Truman pushed Mike out of the way. He held the gun on both women but regarded Rae. “Now where were we?”

“You were kissing my ass,” Rae mumbled, and Jerry laughed.

“You’ve got a brass set, I’ll give you that. However, I am not averse to beating up a woman.”

“Like Amy Davis?”

He gave her an admiring nod. “Good work.”

“What was Amy doing by the river, I asked myself,” Rae said. “She told me she hated water. According to the autopsy, there was water in her lungs and her tissue. She couldn’t swim. Someone knew that and knew she’d drown. So what did you do? You pushed her into the Chicago River while she was still alive. You asshole.”

Truman nodded. “Very good work. Are you a cop or something?”

Rae chuckled. “No.”

“Hmm.” Truman scratched his chin with the barrel of the gun. “I see the wheels turning. You’re getting close, I can tell. Sorry, Amy did fall for you, that’s true. And that was her downfall.”

“She told me she had something to do, but she said she had to change plans.”

She looked at Jerry, who was watching her.

“You slimy bastard,” Jane said quietly. Jerry ignored her. Mike was pacing like a caged lion.

“Arthur Billings. Me.” Rae nodded.

“Bingo.” Truman leaned against the wall. “Let’s see if you’re right. Not that it matters.”

“C’mon, Jerry. Enough, let’s get this over with,” Mike cried out.

Truman never took his eyes off Rae. He put up his hand in Mike’s direction. “If I have to tell you to shut the fuck up one more time.”

“Amy was supposed to get information from me about ComTele, about the new security system. Somewhere during the night, she took my business card. Why?”

“It was a safeguard, just in case you didn’t want to play ball, but Amy got soft and fell for you. Like I said, it was her downfall.” 

“That’s why she said she had to change plans. She didn’t want to go through with it,” Rae said.

“That’s right. She went so far as to threaten me. Me. She threatened me,” he said incredulously. “Imagine my response.” 

“You killed her,” Jane said sadly.

“No, Jane. Our Jerry Truman hasn’t the guts for that. Have you?” Rae asked, and Truman glared at her for an instant. “No, someone else had to do that.” Rae sat back. “No, not Molly. She hasn’t the stomach for it, either. She just wants to stay high and screw Mike and anyone else for that matter.”

Truman laughed and nodded. “This is true.”

Mike took a menacing, albeit shaky step toward her. Rae stiffened, waiting for the blow. However, he stopped and just stared at the floor.

“Mike.” Rae shot a look at him.

Truman chuckled.

“What about Pam?” she asked almost absently. She shook her head. “No, Pam wouldn’t kill her. She may be involved in this, but I don’t think she’d kill Amy.”

“No. You’re right. She was supposed to take care of you,” he said sadly.

“Who cut my brake line—you?” she asked Mike, who was breathing like a bull. “Yes, I can see you doing that. So what happened? How did you get Pam to call me? She may be many things, but a murderer she’s not.”

“Well, she got all strung out, poor thing. She needed her juice. One phone call to you and she got it. With addicts, it’s very simple.”

“You really are a piece a shit,” Rae said.

Truman laughed and agreed. “Yes, but a rich one. Pam, however, got a little greedy and took a bit too much of our gross income. She’d get her fix, then she’d spend like wildfire. I let it go until it was out of control. Then I had no choice.”

“I never saw anything,” Jane said sadly, trying to believe what she was hearing.

Rae watched Jerry. “You wouldn’t. She spent it all on Amy.”

Truman laughed out loud. “You are good. That’s exactly it.” He looked at Jane and shook his head. “You never had a clue. All along, she was fucking your friend even after you found out. But don’t take it to heart. If it’s any consolation, when she gets high, she always calls out your name.”

Jane sat there, stunned. Rae’s heart went out to her. “Thousands of dollars. Everything in her apartment,” Jane said. “That car...the college.” She slumped back in her seat.

“Yeah, whatever,” Truman said impatiently.

Rae needed to stall. She had no idea what time it was, but she knew McGrath had to be coming soon.

“So Mike did all the dirty work, right? Blindsided me in the street with a pipe. Ran over Delia. I’ll bet it was you in the alley too, right?” Rae never took her eyes off the angry face of Mike Porter. “And Mark Rhodes? Fuck, you were busy, you lousy coward.” She snarled at him.

Mike took a step toward her. This time, Truman did not stop him. He punched her so hard, Rae felt her face explode. She flew backward and crashed to the floor. For a moment, she was completely disoriented. Then she felt Mike’s hands on her, dragging her up.

“That’s enough, Mike.”

It was Pam. She was standing there, pointing a gun at Jerry, who had his gun pointed at Jane.

Mike flung Rae back into a chair and turned toward Pam.

Truman stopped him as he watched Pam. “What’s going on, babe?”

Rae flexed her jaw, the pain shot up to her hairline as she swallowed the blood in her mouth. She sat still and glanced at Jane, who had lost all color in her face, but was smart enough to sit still, as well.

The gun Pam held shook precariously as she pointed it at Truman. Rae noticed her hands shaking. She was completely strung out and leaning on the staircase railing. She took one step at a time, never taking her eyes off Truman as she descended the steps.

“Fuck you, babe.” She stumbled slightly at the bottom of the stairs. She quickly recovered and sat on the bottom step. “Back away from her now.”

Rae could see she was on the verge of passing out. So did Jerry, who reached in his pocket and pulled out a vial.

“Here, babe. You take it. I can see you didn’t use what I gave you earlier. That’s not the game plan. Now give me the gun and you can have this. All of it,” he said in a worried voice.

Pam looked at the vial as if it were a lover.

“Pam, please,” Jane cried out.

Pam looked over at her and smiled. “Jane. I’m so sorry,” she said as she trembled. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. Please, believe me.”

Where in the hell was McGrath? Rae thought.

“Yes, Pam, I do. Please,” Jane exclaimed.

Truman took a step, and Pam pointed the gun at his midsection. “Don’t. I may not kill you, but at this range, I can’t miss.”

“C’mon. Give me the gun and take this. You need it, you’ll feel better. I’ll take care of everything,” Truman said.

For an instant, Pam softened and lowered the gun slightly. Then all at once, someone banged on the locked door at the top of the stairs. It had to be McGrath, Rae thought and looked over at Jane and shook her head, pleading with her to stay quiet.

Pam, caught off-guard, looked up, and that was all that Truman needed. He leapt in her direction just as Rae frantically dove for him.

She struggled to her feet to see him fighting with Pam. Mike dashed toward them, and Rae kicked up at him, sending him flying into the small table. She stumbled over to him and kicked him square in the face. Just then, she heard the gun go off. The noise rang through the tiny basement.

Jane screamed out Pam’s name as Rae whirled around to them. Pam had an incredulous look on her face as Truman stood, the smoking gun now in his hand.

“Stupid bitch,” he called out, then he pointed the gun at Rae.

With that, the door crashed open, and Jerry whirled and fired at the top of the staircase. Several bullets riddled his body as he flew back against the wall, then slid down, covered in blood.

Rae ran to Pam, who was lying there, blood oozing from the wound in her chest. Police were everywhere, and instantly, Jane was by Pam’s side.

“Pam!” she sobbed. Pam’s eyelids flickered.

McGrath stood there, holstering his gun. He shook his head at the policemen, “Get an ambulance.”

“Jane,” Pam whispered as blood streamed from her mouth. “I tried...truly, I did...I’m so sorry.”

“You’ll be fine,” Jane insisted.

Rae knelt beside her. The face of Chief Petty Officer Higgins flashed through her mind as she looked down at the blood-soaked body of Pam Rodriguez as Jane cradled her head, crying. Rae pulled her away.

They stood by the ambulance watching the paramedics wheel Pam out of the building. Mike Porter came out handcuffed and escorted to a car.

Rae put her arm around Jane and held her tight. “Poor Pam. What a wasted life,” Jane said between her tears.

“But she nearly gave her life trying to do the right thing. Always remember her that way,” Rae said as she swayed back and forth.

“Rae, you need to get to the hospital,” McGrath said. Rae didn’t even argue; she only nodded.

Not much mattered anymore. She’d seen enough death to last her a lifetime.

Chapter 33

The old doctor came out and smiled. Delia, in a wheelchair, held Jane’s hand, and Sarah stared out the window.

“Well, she’s one tough nut. A broken cheekbone and a slight concussion. She’ll be with us for a day or two.”

Delia and Jane breathed a sigh of relief. Sarah buried her face in her hands for a moment, quietly trying to remember all saints she prayed to.

“She’s asking for you. Just a minute or two. She’s a bit out of it.” He put a hand on her shoulder.

She opened the door and looked over at the bed. Rae lay there in the dark room; a small overhead lamp dimly illuminated the bed. Sarah stifled a gasp as she looked at Rae’s face. Her left eye was swollen shut and her lip cut and swollen. Her face was turning a nice shade of black and blue.

Her eyes opened slightly, trying to focus. “Hey,” she mumbled, and Sarah smoothed her hair.

“Shh...you’re not supposed to talk,” she said softly and kissed her forehead. “Your beautiful face,” she whispered, trying not to cry.

“It’ll be an improvement,” Rae mumbled, then frowned. “You’re too good for this,” she said almost inaudibly. So much so that Sarah bent closer to hear.

Rae had faded off, and Sarah sat, holding her hand. She lay her cheek against Rae’s hand and cried softly.

*******

After a couple of days, Rae stood by the hospital window, staring out at the bleak autumn day. She heard the door open and stiffly turned around. It was Sarah with flowers.

“Good morning. You’re up, that’s good...Though you still look like you’ve been through eight rounds.” She rearranged the flowers. She knew Rae was still in a dark mood. Twice she told Sarah to forget about her and leave.

Now Rae stood there watching her. “Sarah.” She winced and put her hand to her swollen cheek. She swallowed and tried again. “I thought I told you…”

Sarah looked at her. “To leave, I know. Is that what you really want?”

Rae turned from her. “Yes. It’s what I really want. Now will you beat it?” she said as clearly as her broken cheek would allow.

Sarah put the newspaper on the bed. “All right, I’ll go. I can’t make you love me. I can’t do that for you. So wallow in this for as long as you like. I truly hope you can find your way out of it. If you do, give me a call,” she said as her heart ached.

She took a step toward Rae. “Maybe someday I’ll find you,” she whispered, “again.” She turned, barely able to see through the tears that flooded her eyes. “Goodbye, Commander Jefferson.” She hurried out the door.

Rae stared out at the cold day. “Goodbye, Professor Connelly,” she whispered as she blinked, sending the tears rolling down her cheeks.

Chapter 34

The winter had come and gone. It was March. The snow was gone, and the fresh smell of spring was in the air. Rae stood by her fireplace, staring at the flames. Her bruises healed, and her cheek was back to normal. She could finally eat solid foods.

She stood alone, watching the fire as she drank her coffee. Sarah’s face crowded her every thought. She hadn’t spoken to her since she left that day in the hospital. Rae knew she wouldn’t call. It was up to Rae, and Rae thought the best thing was to let her get on with her life, find a normal healthy lesbian, and live happily ever after.

“What the fuck do I know?” she said to her coffee cup.

To get her mind off Sarah, which she knew was impossible for long, she thought of the trial that ensued after the mess was over. Jerry Truman, of course, was still dead. Pam testified that she thought Amy’s death was an accident. Deep in her heart, she knew they killed her.

However, with the case reopened, DNA testing found Mike Porter all over Amy’s body and all over her apartment. He never admitted to it, so it was never quite clear. As much as McGrath and the D.A. could ascertain, he must have given Amy that drug from ComTele and got her to the Chicago River. He either pushed her in or... Perhaps he reconsidered and tried not to. Perhaps Amy did slip and fall into the river. No one would ever know, but it didn’t matter. They found him guilty.

The ComTele building had been vacant for three months. They fired poor Mr. Billings; the government contracts were taken away and the business sold. His nephew Mike Porter got twenty to life for murder, dealing drugs, and myriad other felonies.

They found Molly Eastman two months later in her bed. She had overdosed and died three weeks after that—complications from pneumonia. Pam was sentenced to five years for possession and dealing. Being her first offense and the fact that she nearly died trying to stop Jerry Truman, the court showed mercy; it was reduced to two, and with good behavior, she’d serve six months. She had an excellent lawyer. She’d be out soon, nearly all that time spent in a prison hospital. This nightmare ruined her, as well.

The Snake Pit closed. A diner was going up in its place after it was fumigated. What a story, Rae thought, and what a tragedy. Although it brought Sarah Connelly into her life, it was at a great cost.

The ring of her doorbell broke her thoughts. It was Delia and Jane. Jane kissed Rae and handed her a bouquet of daffodils. Rae looked at them, instantly remembering last October.

“Thanks,” she said quietly as Jane took the flowers and headed toward the kitchen.

Delia kissed her, as well. “Call Sarah?”

Rae frowned. “No. Will you two quit with that? It’s over and done.”

“We just stopped by on our way out shopping. You’ve isolated yourself up here for the past five months. Not even coming over for Thanksgiving or Christmas,” Delia scolded as she sat and sighed. She then looked at Jane and shook her head.

“So you’re just going to let her get away from you? Just let the only woman in the world that you’ve ever loved…” Delia said angrily.

Rae paced back and forth. “Damn it, Delia. Will you butt out?” she bellowed.

Jane sat and listened to both of them.

With that, the doorbell rang again. “Christ, Grand Central Station,” she cursed and answered the door. It was Betty.

“Why am I not surprised?” She stepped back.

Betty grunted a good morning and smiled at Delia and Jane.

“Ladies, good morning. Any luck?” she asked dryly. They shook their heads.

“Get me a cup of tea, please, Jane,” she asked and winked. Jane chuckled and headed for the kitchen.

Rae stood there, watching all of them. “Okay, what’s going on?” She looked at Delia. “Delia, spill it.”

“Sarah is leaving town.”

“A vacation?” Rae’s heart sank.

“No, she is seriously considering moving to California,” Betty interjected.

Rae paced in front of the fire. “What’s in California?” She felt sick to her stomach at the very idea.

“Not what...who,” Delia said.

Rae looked back and forth, dumbfounded.

Betty rolled her eyes. “Commander Jefferson, you are a nincompoop,” she said emphatically. Jane had just come in with her tea, and she stopped. Delia tried desperately not to laugh.

Rae just blinked, saying nothing.

“A nincompoop is a…”

“I’m well aware of what a nincompoop is,” Rae said evenly. “She’s moving to California with this Sharon woman.”

Betty grunted. “Well, it’s about time. Yes, now what are you going to do about it?”

Rae shot her an incredulous look. “Do? She’s a grown woman.”

Delia groaned out loud and set her teacup down with a bang. Jane sat next to her and squeezed her knee. “Rae Jefferson, you’re in love with her, and she’s in love with you. Now if Sergeant Walchek were here, you know what he’d say...What are you prepared to do?”

There was silence for a moment. “It’s a fairly simple question. Even a nincompoop…” Betty started.

Rae glared at her. “She’s better off.”

“You coward!” Delia spat out and stood.

Rae whirled around, a dark look flashed across her face. “That’s enough, Delia,” she said with quiet resolution.

“It’s not nearly enough. You hide behind Higgins and use that whole episode as an excuse to avoid getting on with life. The fact is you’re scared. You’ve finally met the one, and you don’t know what to do about it. Well, join the fucking club!” she said angrily.

Betty coughed, and Delia turned red.

“Sorry,” she mumbled and sat.

Rae turned to her, tears in her eyes. She threw herself into her chair and buried her head in her hands.

“Rae,” Jane started, “when I realized how Pam’s life was so screwed up, I felt responsible somehow. I should have known she was in trouble with drugs and everything else, but now, I realize that I couldn’t have helped her. She was on a downward spiral, and only she could get herself out of it. If she took the offered help... Rae, you love Sarah. Don’t let the past nightmare ruin the dream of her.”

Rae looked up and smiled through her tears. “You’re quite a poet.”

“Professor Connelly was a good teacher.”

Rae looked over at Betty, who was leaning on her cane, giving her a matriarchal look. Rae chuckled, thanking the gods for such good friends.

“She’s at the Village Inn, outside of Lake Geneva. Room 312. I believe she’s planning on spending the weekend with Sharon, who should be joining her later this evening,” Betty said, and Rae’s mind raced at the thought of someone else touching her, holding her...

“What are you prepared to do?” Delia asked once again.

“Can I borrow your car?” she asked Delia and headed for the bedroom to change.

“Don’t you dare go to her unless you make an honest woman out of her!” Betty called after her and winked at Jane and Delia. “I will not have the head of the English Literature Department of Northwestern University hurt in any way!” she added and leaned into Jane. “This is so much fun,” she declared with a small giggle and stopped as Rae came down the hall.

Delia tossed her the car keys, and Rae plucked them out of the air. She kissed Betty’s head. “Keep still, you meddling old woman. I love all of you, truly I do.” She headed out the door.

They all looked at the door, then back to one another.

“Well, round one,” Betty said. “Keep your fingers crossed. Now I’m taking you both to a very expensive restaurant for lunch.”

Chapter 35

Sarah looked at the lonely fireplace, then looked around the room. She put her suitcase on the bed and sat. It was an adorable and cozy room. Betty had this idea for her to get away for the weekend. Though she had dozens of papers to grade and laundry up the wazoo, Betty insisted and wouldn’t leave her alone.

Well, time alone would be good for her. She looked out at the lake and decided to go for a walk. She bundled up and headed out.

As she walked by the water, her mind constantly wandered to Rae. It’d been so long since she’s heard from her—too long.

“Damn that woman.” She sighed openly as she pulled her coat around her. I know she loves me, Sarah thought. It was in her kiss, the way she touched her, and the look in her blue eyes. “I know I’m right,” she said but knew she could do nothing about it. She headed back to her room and sat, staring out the window.

*******

Rae pulled into the parking lot of the Village Inn. It was noon, plenty of time before that Sharon creature was to arrive. She walked up to the desk, and a woman smiled a greeting.

“I need a room, please. I know it’s short notice,” she started, and the woman asked her name and Rae gave it.

“Your reservation is all set, room 314. It adjoins room 312.” She smiled and handed Rae the key.

“Um, okay,” Rae said stupidly, not knowing what was going on. “Has Ms. Connelly checked in yet?”

She looked at the register. “Yes, she has. She’s in her room now.”

Rae’s heart was skipping out of control. She took a deep breath. “I wonder if you can do me a huge favor. Do you have a florist close by?”

*******

An hour later, Sarah got tired of looking out at the woods. She decided to take a long hot soak. That should take her mind off Rae—fat chance.

It didn’t work, it made it worse. She lay in the luxurious bubbles only wishing Rae was with her. As she put on her robe, someone knocked at her door. She opened it and was shocked to see Rae standing there, holding one daffodil. She held it out and smiled fondly.

“Forgive me, Sarah, please. It’s ‘Be nice to an idiot week.’”

Sarah stood there stupefied but took the daffodil and stepped back. Rae walked into the room.

“How did you know I was here?” she asked, gently holding the yellow flower.

Rae smiled quietly. “We have very, very good friends. Brutally honest but good friends nonetheless.” She looked around. “May I sit?”

Sarah nodded and sat on the window seat. Rae sat in the chair by the fireplace. “Good grief, woman, you’ve got a fireplace... Do you mind?”

“No, please.”

Rae could see she was hesitant, and she couldn’t blame her. Without a word, she had the fire roaring and crackling in a few moments.

She sat back, and they sat in silence, staring at the fire. After a moment, Rae broke the silence. “I’m every kind of a fool, Sarah. This is twice I’ve hurt you since we’ve met. I don’t know if saying I’m sorry is good enough or if you want to hear it from me. I just don’t want you to go to California with that woman without—”

“California? With what woman?” she asked, truly baffled.

Rae looked at her. “Sarah, please, I know all about it. I want you happy. I just don’t want you to run off—”

“Run off? What do you take me for—some teenager? Or perhaps you think I’m as addle-brained as the women you sleep with.”

Rae gaped at her. “Hey, I haven’t slept with anyone since you. And they were not all addle-brained,” she said heatedly. “I’m sorry if they didn’t meet with your academic standard like Sharon,” she added sarcastically.

“Meet it? They probably couldn’t spell it,” Sarah countered angrily. “And where did you get the idea that I was going to California with Sharon? Are you insane?” She gave her a skeptical look. “It’s a bit early, but have you been drinking?”

Rae took a menacing step toward her and stopped. “No, I have not been drinking. I haven’t had a drink in six stinking months! But I almost started smoking again,” she bellowed, and Sarah winced.

“Well, that accounts for the temper,” she said lightly.

Rae would have none of it. “Betty and the girls told me the whole story,” she said smugly.

“What whole story?” Sarah asked as if she were talking to a mental patient.

Rae sighed and rubbed her forehead. “Okay, we’ll play your game. They told me how you’ve been seeing that Sharon woman. How she’s got you going to California, quitting your job.”

Sarah listened, then realized what was going on. Poor Rae, she thought happily and chuckled.

“What’s so funny? I’m not kidding. You are not quitting your job and you are not moving to California.” 

“And why not?” Sarah looked into her blue eyes.

Rae blinked and ran her fingers through her hair in a helpless gesture. “Well, it isn’t practical, for one. And I don’t want to see you do something you’ll regret. It’s bad enough you got hooked up with me for a bit.”

“You’re the one who has a problem with that. You sent me away. No, that’s not a good enough reason.”

Rae swallowed with difficulty as her heart raced. “Well, Betty then. You don’t want to leave her, do you?”

“I’d write. There isn’t much to keep me here.”

Now Rae frowned deeply. She took Sarah by the hand and led her over to the door that adjoined their rooms.

“Rae Jefferson, don’t think you can play caveman with me. I…” She stopped as Rae opened the door and stepped back.

Sarah put her hands up to her face in amazement as she looked around the room. There were dozens of daffodils everywhere, crowding the room; the spring fragrance wafted over both of them.

“They didn’t have ten thousand. I promised you daffodils in the spring, Sarah. Can’t you think of something to make you stay?” she pleaded.

Sarah looked up at her, shocked to see the tears rimming her blue eyes. “I never intended to leave. You sent me away, remember?” she said in a shaky voice.

Rae put her hands on her shoulders and caressed. “A mistake I will gladly make up to you for the rest of my life,” she whispered in a trembling voice.

“There is no Sharon.” She smiled.

Rae was confused. Then it dawned on her—Betty. “There, um, there is no Sharon?” she asked foolishly.

“No, Rae,” Sarah said affectionately. “There never was.”

“Betty, Jane, and Delia. The Three Stooges, I’m gonna kill them.” Rae sighed, feeling like an idiot.

“No, we’re going to thank them.” Sarah reached up and put her hand behind Rae’s neck and pulled her down to her.

Rae sighed openly as their lips met in a heavenly kiss. She wrapped her arms around her waist and held her close. “Well, then I guess you’re not leaving the university?”

“No.” Sarah kissed her cheek.

Rae closed her eyes, reveling in the feel of the woman she so desperately loved. “And you’re not going to California?” she asked as her voice trembled.

“Well, I told you once. I’d have to be head over heels in love to leave the Midwest.”

“Yeah, this head over heels in love thing you keep talking about. Do you think you could be head over heels and stay?” Rae asked. “Because I’m tired of wandering lonely as a cloud, as you put it. I’m new at this, but I do believe I’m head over heels in love, for the first and only time in my life.”

Sarah heard the pleading tone in her voice as she cupped Rae’s face with both hands. She desperately tried not to cry.

“I can’t leave now that I’ve found you,” Sarah whispered against her lips, “again.”

About the author

Kate Sweeney, a 2010 Alice B. Medal winner, was the 2007 recipient of the Golden Crown Literary Society award for Debut Author for She Waits, the first in the Kate Ryan Mystery series. The series also includes A Nice Clean Murder, The Trouble with Murder, a 2008 Golden Crown Award winner for Mystery, Who’ll Be Dead for Christmas? a 2009 Golden Crown Award winner for Mystery, Of Course It’s Murder, What Happened in Malinmore, and A Near Myth Murder.

Other novels include Away from the Dawn, Survive the Dawn, Before the Dawn, Residual Moon, a 2008 Golden Crown Award winner for Speculative Fiction, Liar’s Moon, The O’Malley Legacy, Winds of Heaven, Sea of Grass, Paradise, and Love at Last.

Born in Chicago, Kate moved to Louisiana, and this Yankee doubts she’ll ever get used to saying y’all. Humor is deeply embedded in Kate’s DNA. She sincerely hopes you will see this when you read her novels, short stories, and other works. Email Kate at ksweeney22@aol.com. 

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Winds of Heaven

by Kate Sweeney

ISBN: 978-1-935216-06-3

After the untimely death of a former lover, Casey Bennet receives a letter from Julie’s lawyer, begging Casey to help Julie’s partner, Liz Kennedy, and their adorable, yet precocious three-year old, Skye, who are now alone.

An avowed bachelorette, Casey has no idea what’s in store when she grudgingly agrees to help Liz, who, by the way, is also pregnant and due in four months.

Casey, Liz, and little Skye find themselves in for a hilarious, tender ride that will change their lives forever.

Sea Of Grass

by Kate Sweeney

ISBN: 978-1-935216-15-5

Professor Tess Rawlins spent the last twelve years teaching agriculture in California, away from Montana and her heart. When she’s called back to the sprawling Double R cattle ranch and her ailing father, Tess is thrown back into the world she had nearly forgotten since the death of her brother two years earlier.

Unsettling memories boil to the surface for Tess, and her only pleasant distraction is the new cook Claire Redman and her son Jack. However, there is more facing Professor Rawlins than dealing with the memory of her brother or her attraction to Claire. Tess must figure a way to save the Rawlins’s five thousand acres of rich grassland. It has thrived for five generations, when her great-grandfather started the dynasty in the 1880s; now she may lose it all to an unscrupulous land developer.

Set in the foothills of the Bitterroots, Tess and Claire find themselves in the fight of their lives—for love and the sea of grass.

Love At Last

by Kate Sweeney

ISBN: 978-1-935216-32-2

At forty-nine, Alana Sanders was at the stage where life should be easier. She had put her artistic passion on hold when she married, raised two children, and kept a happy home.

Now that the kids are grown and out of the house, it’s Alana’s time at last. However, she and her husband find themselves faced with a new and sad dilemma—figuring out who the stranger is who sits across the dining room table. The questions and doubt begin when Alana retraces the decisions she has made that brought her to this point.

As her life unravels around her, she meets Toni O’Hara, a Chicago fire inspector. Through her humor and compassion, Toni helps Alana come to terms with her life, her culpability in her failed marriage, and the most wonderful realization of all—love, at last.

The Kate Ryan Mystery series, by Kate Sweeney

She Waits - Book One:  - ISBN: 978-1-933113-40-5

A Nice Clean Murder - Book Two: ISBN: 978-1-933113-78-4

The Trouble With Murder - Book Three: ISBN: 978-1-933113-85-2

Who’ll be Dead for Christmas - Book Four ISBN: 978-1-935216-00-1

Of Course It’s Murder - Book Five: ISBN: 978-1-935216-11-7

What Happened In Malinmore - Book six: ISBN: 978-1-935216-24-7

A Near Myth Murder - Book Seven: ISBN: 978-1-935216-34-6

Also by Kate Sweeney. The Dawn/Moon Series

Away From The Dawn  ISBN: 978-1-933113-81-4

Residual Moon  ISBN: 978-1-933113-94-4

Survive the Dawn  ISBN: 978-1-935216-04-9

Liar’s Moon  ISBN: 978-1-935216-19-3

Before The Dawn  ISBN: 978-1-935216-29-2

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