An Ellora’s Cave Romantica Publication

www.ellorascave.com

A Helping Hand

ISBN 9781419917387

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

A Helping Hand Copyright © 2008 Shayla Kersten

Edited by Mary Moran.

Photography and cover art by Les Byerley.

Electronic book Publication August 2008

With the exception of quotes used in reviews, this book may not be reproduced or used in whole or in part by any means existing without written permission from the publisher, Ellora’s Cave Publishing, Inc.® 1056 Home Avenue, Akron OH 44310-3502.

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This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or places, events or locales is purely coincidental. The characters are productions of the authors’ imagination and used fictitiously.

A Helping Hand

Shayla Kersten

Acknowledgements

To Cynthia D’Alba, a fantastic critique partner and friend.

Trademarks Acknowledgement

The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this work of fiction:

Jaws of Life: Hurst Performance, Inc.

Maker’s Mark: Maker’s Mark Distillery, Inc.

University of Tennessee: University of Tennessee

Wal-Mart: Wal-Mart Stores, Inc.

Chapter One

Richard Taylor’s headlights found the state trooper’s cruiser sitting in the dark, off the road and waiting for speeders. Since Rich wasn’t speeding and was actually a deputy sheriff on his own patrol, he wasn’t worried about getting a ticket.

His lips crooked upward at the thought of Trooper Daniel Fletcher—his best friend, a womanizing ladies’ man with a heart of gold and the subject of most of Rich’s jerk-off fantasies. His smile slipped. He wondered whether Dan would still be his friend if he knew that last part.

Rich flashed his lights at the cruiser before pulling in beside it. Dan’s hand appeared in the bright beams then pulled the side mirror in so Rich could pull his unit close in the tight spot. Rich grabbed his mirror and did the same as he eased the car to a stop, driver’s window to driver’s window.

“Hey there.” Dan’s face was pale in the light of an almost full moon.

“How’s it going?”

“Slow night.” Dan shrugged. “Only one ticket. Thought about dropping it until I saw her wedding band.” His teeth flashed white in his shadowed face.

Rich laughed at Dan’s implication. Dan was always looking for his next date, but Rich knew he was joking. Dan’s scruples were one of the things Rich liked most about the man. He would no more drop a ticket for a quickie than Rich would.

“Want some?” Dan held up his ever-present thermos.

Addicted to coffee, Dan always shared when Rich showed up. He even kept several small foam cups in his cruiser for Rich’s use.

Their breath, visible in the cold January night air, mingled as they talked. Rich breathed in through his mouth as if he could taste the other man on the frozen air. A hopeless fantasy. He pushed his thoughts to the back of his mind. Something best saved for the morning when he would be alone in his bed. “Sure. You know I never turn down coffee.” Or a chance to talk with his best friend.

Dan started pouring before Rich finished his answer.

“So what happened with Lizzie?” Rich reached across the short distance for the coffee cup. He shivered from more than cold when Dan’s fingers brushed his.

“How’d you hear about that?”

“I went to the grocery store.”

Dan snorted as he poured his own cup. “Lizzie’s sister.”

“Yeah. Gossip central. I swear they could tell you which of your dog’s fleas jumped ship today.” Rich sipped the strong, hot liquid. “So, what’s your side of the story?”

“She’s just not the one.”

Rich smiled behind his coffee cup. Dan’s search for the elusive “one”—the perfect woman—was the talk of the county. After dating nearly half the available women in the small community, Dan still hadn’t found someone.

“It’s not as if I don’t want to settle down, I just can’t find a woman I think I could live with forever.” Dan’s comment wasn’t a new one.

“But Lizzie seemed like a good fit. Not too clingy, not calling all the time. Not like Sharon.” Even the mention of Sharon’s name sent a shudder down Rich’s back. That one had the makings of a stalker. In the pale moonlight he could see Dan had the same reaction.

“Don’t mention her! She’s scary.”

“Hey, you were the one who said she was harmless!” Rich chuckled at the idea of his tall muscular friend afraid of the petite brunette.

“Well, after a while I thought I’d find her boiling bunnies in my kitchen! She can hold a grudge like nobody’s business.”

Rich laughed. “She’d never boil bunnies. She loves animals. You, on the other hand, are a different story. I thought we’d have to assign a protective detail on your house!”

As they both laughed, a speeding car topped the hill, setting Dan’s radar beeping.

“Gotta go.” Dan switched on his blue lights and pulled out before Rich had time to say goodbye.

Rich watched in the darkness as the flashing lights of Dan’s car gained on the speeder. His friend was a damn attractive man and never had trouble getting dates. His chiseled features and deep blue eyes had most of the women he met willing and ready with little effort. Not to mention the great body.

Even his reputation didn’t seem to hurt his chances. The fact he was kind and sensitive to the point that most of his ex-girlfriends had no hard feelings didn’t hurt. Just the kind of man women wanted to take home to meet the parents.

Rich wasn’t overly modest about his own looks. He kept his body in shape, partly out of pride in his physique and partly out of the demands of the job. He never had trouble getting his own dates.

However, his tastes ran more to lean, masculine bodies and hard cocks. A small rural county in Tennessee wasn’t exactly the best place to come out of the closet, and since he wasn’t his best friend’s type, why bother. He hadn’t met anyone he wanted a lasting relationship with, anyone worth the trouble such a revelation would cause.

Occasional trips to see his friend Jeremy in Memphis, one hundred and fifty miles away, helped take the edge off when things got too bad. He could relax with Jeremy and not worry about people finding out his secret.

Lost in his thoughts, it took a few seconds for Rich’s mind to realize the speeder wasn’t stopping.

The radio crackled with Dan’s unit number. “J-12 in pursuit, possible 10-49, northbound 641, mile 6.”

Rich flipped his lights on as he backed out of the spot. He could still see the blue strobe lights of Dan’s cruiser in the distance. A drunk driver was a pain in the ass, but a fleeing one was an accident wanting to happen. He reached for his radio as he pulled out of the shadows and joined the pursuit. “Dispatch, C-6 to assist J-12.”

Tossing his radio mike on the passenger seat as the dispatcher acknowledged, he floored the accelerator. Rich closed the distance enough to see the white tail of a deer flash blue as it ran across the highway.

Dan’s cruiser swerved in an erratic jerk—first left then right—then flew off the left side of the road. The flashing blue strobe danced in the darkness. As if in slow motion, the car flipped.

Rich’s heart was in his throat as he watched it roll out of sight down an embankment. “Dispatch, 10-36 with 10-34. Mile 10 northbound 641.”

His car screeched to a stop near where Dan had gone over. He had the door open before the dispatcher acknowledged his call of an accident with an officer in trouble.

Grabbing his flashlight and handheld radio, he scrambled down the damp, slippery grass of the steep embankment, part of the time on his ass. To his relief, the cruiser had landed right side up. Police cars were tough, but it was difficult getting to an accident victim hanging upside down from a seat belt.

His radio crackled and squawked with activity, dispatch asking for information, the other county units and first responders acknowledging they were on the way. Rich didn’t bother to answer. He had nothing to tell them until he reached Dan. His voice, throat tight with fear, wouldn’t have worked well anyway.

The beam of his flashlight reflected back in a rainbow of colors. The windshield was fractured but intact. Dan was a shadow on the other side.

Rich scrambled around to the driver’s side and found the window shattered. Shining his light into the car, he saw pellets of broken glass glittered all over his friend. The sharp copper smell of blood greeted him first.

Crimson contrasted starkly with Dan’s pale face. Blood darkened his sandy brown hair.

Rich breathed a sigh of relief as the glass-covered chest rose and fell. He was alive.

Touching Dan’s neck with shaking fingers, a rapid but strong pulse reassured him. “That’s my boy, Danny,” Rich mumbled. “Stay alive for me.”

Leaning into the car to assess the damage, his mind focused on the job at hand. He was a cop at the scene of an accident. He forced threatening panic aside. Sirens shattered the night as Rich pulled at the door. It wasn’t opening. He keyed his radio.

“He’s unconscious, steady, rapid pulse. Head injury, probably contact with the driver’s side window. We might need the Jaws of Life—driver’s side door is jammed.” Rich winced as his flashlight illuminated the odd angle of Dan’s right wrist. “Definitely a broken wrist, maybe his hand or fingers as well,” he added as he noticed the crooked little finger.

“Shit, Dan,” he whispered to his unconscious friend, “that’s really gonna hurt. You should’ve hit the fucking deer!”

The sirens stopped on the road above and people flowed down the embankment.

“Hang in there,” he whispered. Rich caressed his friend’s blood-dampened hair briefly before he moved away to let the paramedics do their job.

* * * * *

“Hey, John!” Rich called to one of the three off-duty deputies who showed up at the scene. “Get someone to take my unit in. I’m riding with Dan.”

His keys jangled as the other man caught them and nodded.

The paramedic made room for him as he climbed in the back. “How’s he doing?”

“Aw, he’ll be all right. Probably a mild concussion, but he’s got a hard head. He’ll survive. He’s gonna have fun with that hand though. Really fucked it up.”

“Yeah…”

“Oh well, he’ll have all his old girlfriends volunteering to take care of him!”

Rich smiled at the man’s words in spite of the slight swell of anger they caused. Everyone knew Dan and his love life was the talk of the county.

* * * * *

The antiseptic smell of the hospital was little comfort as Rich waited for the doctor. At least he had company.

Sheriff Ben Wheeler showed up sleep-rumpled and his eyes heavy-lidded. The older man didn’t say much as he stared into his cold coffee. Ben felt responsible for every law enforcement officer who worked his county, regardless of affiliation.

The other state trooper assigned to the area came in a few minutes after the sheriff. They were a close-knit community and even if they weren’t, everyone loved Dan. Word spread fast. The district captain called from Jackson about an hour into the wait and said he’d be there in the morning.

Rich claimed the seat across from the exam room door. His gaze wandered endlessly over the scrapes and abrasions from years of gurneys attacking the door. Maybe if he concentrated hard enough someone would come out and tell him something. Two and a half hours later the door opened. He bolted to his feet. “How is he?”

Dr. Anna Schuster was a petite brunette with killer brown eyes and of course a former girlfriend of Dan’s. Fortunately they had parted company as friends. Dan couldn’t be in better hands.

“He’ll be fine. It was a real pain setting his fingers. He managed to mangle his hand pretty bad. Looks like he caught it in the steering wheel. He won’t be able to use it at all for a while. The right wrist is a clean break above the joint so we put a cast on it, but fingers can be a pain because of the size and complexity of the bones. His thumb and forefinger are fine but we immobilized all his fingers for now.” She ran a delicate hand through her hair. “If they don’t mend properly, he might need surgery. I’ll want him to see an orthopedic surgeon in Jackson as soon as possible.”

She glanced down at her notes before continuing. “He also has a slight concussion, nothing serious. Impact bruises on his chest and abdomen from the seat belt, probably will have a sore left shoulder. Nicks and cuts from flying glass. His eyes look fine—no glass fragments—but we’ll have an ophthalmologist come in to look at him, just to be safe. We’ll keep him for a couple of days, but he’s going to need help when he gets home. He can’t move his hand at all for a couple of weeks.”

“I’ll help since I live near him,” Rich volunteered without thinking.

Dan’s family acreage had two small homes on it, his grandparents’ and his parents’. Dan had moved into his grandmother’s house after she died nearly eight years ago. When Dan’s parents were killed in a car accident five years ago, not wanting to leave the other house empty, Dan offered to rent it to Rich.

Ben looked at him and nodded. “You have time coming to you. Take it.”

“Good! That’s settled,” Anna said with a nod. “Ya’ll might as well go home. He’ll be out of it for the rest of the night.” She grinned at her law enforcement audience. “I have access to really good drugs.”

The laughter helped ease Rich’s tension. Dan would be okay. Rich would make sure of it.

* * * * *

Declining Ben’s offer of a ride home, Rich stayed at the hospital. Until Dan woke, he didn’t want to leave.

Anna had led Rich to a curtained-off area where Dan was resting then left him there.

Rich couldn’t quite catch his breath. Every time he calmed, his memory dredged up the vision of Dan’s car flying over the embankment. Posttraumatic panic and the adrenaline rush wearing off made him jittery.

Leaning over his unconscious friend, Rich ran his fingers through Dan’s soft hair. Rusty-colored medication stained his scalp and hairline near the bandage covering his head wound. The sound of someone outside the curtain thwarted the temptation to place a kiss on his forehead.

“You should go home, get some rest,” Anna’s tired voice admonished him.

“I don’t want him wake up alone.” Rich forced down a rising flush before he turned toward her.

“I understand.” Anna’s eyes reflected her smile. “I’m going off shift. Wanted to check on him one last time myself.” Picking up his chart, she checked the readings on various machines then made a few chicken-scratch notes.

Anna and Dan had had quite a thing going for a while. When Anna broke up with him, Rich was floored. He thought she would be the one. Gorgeous, intelligent and a wicked sense of humor, she seemed like Dan’s perfect woman. Hell, if he were straight, Rich would go for her. Dan hadn’t even seemed upset when she called it quits.

“What?” Anna’s word startled him into realizing he was staring.

“Sorry… I…”

“Say it.”

“I can’t understand why you broke up with him.”

Anna’s musical laugh was even attractive. “It’s been two years. That’s ancient history. Why ask now?”

“Don’t know…” Rich shrugged as he shook his head. “Just tired, I guess.” He rubbed hard at the back of his neck. “My mind’s all over the map tonight.”

“Well, it’s morning, not night, and you need rest. As far as your question,” she shook her head and sighed, “he never seemed happy. It’s hard to explain. We got along fine but there was always something missing. I broke it off before he did.”

“He wants to settle down, find someone to make a life with. He deserves to be happy.”

“I’m sure he’ll finally find the right person someday. It just wasn’t me. I don’t hold it against him.”

Rich’s gaze dropped to Dan’s pale face. He did deserve to be happy. When he looked back up, Anna’s curious smile made him realize he was stroking Dan’s hair again. He snatched his hand away as if from a fire. Letting down his guard was dangerous.

“He’ll be okay. Want a ride home?”

He couldn’t force himself to accept no matter how it looked. Instead, he shook his head. “No thanks. I’ll stay a little longer.”

* * * * *

Dan hurt. All over. Felt as if he’d been beaten with a really big stick. Baseball bat came to mind. Nerve endings fed him information in bits and pieces. His head… A week-long drunk wouldn’t cause a headache this bad. His chest. A deep breath hurt. His hand, his right hand… God, the pain was deep, throbbing and burning at the same time.

Other senses jumped on the bandwagon. Antiseptic stung his nose, the rustle and beep of a machine, voices and footsteps in the distance, or maybe another room.

His memory decided to help him out at last. The squelch and crackle of his unit’s radio, breaking glass, crunching metal, Rich’s voice, sirens… Rich’s voice…

Stay alive for me…

Something restrained his left hand but his eyes refused to check it out. His fingers reluctantly agreed to flex, not much, but some. Sandpaper? Didn’t make sense. Something tickled his wrist, made it itch. His mind tried to focus on the cause. A puff of air and then another. This time his fingers wiggled. Flesh and a five o’clock shadow?

His eyes rolled in protest but Dan forced his uncooperative eyelids open a slight crack. Tousled dark short hair… His eyelids won the battle and closed.

Rich. “Rich…” Dan wasn’t sure he said it aloud.

The short puffs of air changed to a long, drawn-out sigh. Moist lips, softer than he would have expected, pressed against the back of his hand. A tingling rush of excitement traveled through him before his body reminded him of the pain.

Rich hadn’t meant to fall asleep. His neck cramped from resting his face on Dan’s hand. Wrapped around Dan’s and used as part of his uncomfortable pillow, his own hand tingled with pins and needles of poor blood circulation. His mind was still asleep when he kissed Dan’s hand, but he bolted awake when he heard the hoarse whisper.

He jumped up to check on his friend but his hand stayed merged with Dan’s. Weak fingers squeezed and held on.

“Hey there.” He couldn’t stop the silly grin plastered across his face.

“Hurt. Bad…” Tears formed at the corner of Dan’s eyes.

“I know, but you’re gonna be okay.” One hand stroked the sandy brown hair as his other squeezed Dan’s. “Anna said so.”

“Anna’s here?”

“Nah, she went home earlier but she was on call when you came in last night.”

“My hand—wrist—hurts…burns…”

“You broke your wrist and three fingers. Must have caught it in the steering wheel.” His fingers left the soft hair for the call button. “They’ll give you something for the pain. You’re going to be okay.”

Dan nodded as a tear slid free from where it formed and trailed down his cheek. With gentle fingers Rich swiped it away then let his touch linger on the pale cheek.

“You’re going to be okay,” Rich repeated.

* * * * *

Rich turned over in his bed then punched his pillow. The alarm clock glowed three twenty—taunting him. Sleep wasn’t happening. His thoughts chased each other around in circles and kept coming back to a startling revelation.

Worry over his friend’s injuries had settled into worry of a different kind. Dan’s accident brought out feelings Rich was afraid to admit. And those feelings were making him careless.

He could still feel Dan’s skin against his lips. What possessed him to kiss Dan’s hand was beyond him. Thankfully Dan had been too out of it to realize what Rich had done. But there were other people… The hospital hadn’t gotten Dan a room until late yesterday morning. Rich had been holding Dan’s hand, had kissed it, with no more privacy than a couple of curtains pulled around the bed.

The accident flashed though his mind again. The memory resuscitated the fear and made his heart beat faster. He could’ve lost him. Dan could’ve died.

Bone-tired, Rich scrubbed at his face with both hands. He’d stayed at the hospital until he saw Dan settled in a room a little before noon. Too much adrenaline stayed in Rich’s system for him to sleep. He ran some errands—groceries, DVDs—preparing for Dan’s homecoming tomorrow—today.

Even now with more than thirty hours awake, Rich couldn’t sleep. The accident haunted his dreams as well as his thoughts.

* * * * *

Rich flashed a tired smile at the nurses as he hurried past their station.

“You ready to escape this joint?” he asked as he pushed the door open.

Dan sat on the side of the bed in a hospital gown. “Absolutely! I hope you brought me something to wear!”

“I dropped you off some sweats yesterday while you were having the eye exam. Didn’t you find them?”

“Yesterday?”

A giggle from behind him told the story. When Rich turned around, three nurses blocked the doorway, the one in the middle held the plastic grocery bag with Dan’s clothes.

“Very funny, ladies!” Dan stormed across the room, grabbed the bag with his good hand, shoved it under his arm then marched into the bathroom.

The hospital gown provided a glimpse of heaven in Rich’s world. He moved to block the view from the giggling gaggle in the doorway.

Rich rounded on the three nurses. “Now that wasn’t very nice. What did you do that for?”

“Getting back at him for treating Sharon so bad,” one of them said with a smirk.

“Oh bullshit. Ya’ll just like looking at his ass. Now get outta here!” He closed the door on the three women.

A groan from the bathroom refocused his attention on his friend. “Dan? You okay in there?”

“Damn it all to hell!”

Rich arched his eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t get my fucking clothes on!”

Rich rolled his eyes toward the ceiling. He had to help, but he hoped Dan was at least halfway dressed. The thought of seeing his friend buck-assed naked caused his cock to stir. “Down, boy,” he murmured. “We’ll just have to save it for when we’re alone.” Great. He was talking to his dick.

Opening the bathroom door revealed a bare-chested Dan with his boxer briefs…well, kind of on but very twisted.

Rich winced at the dark bruises, outlines of the seat belt, across Dan’s lightly furred chest. A fleeting thought of kissing his injuries better ran through his mind. With a silent scold to his cock and his one-track mind, he pushed the errant thoughts away.

“Now that has to be uncomfortable.” He nodded at the twisted shorts. Rich’s smirk did nothing for his friend’s mood.

“Fuck you,” Dan said as he tried to straighten his shorts with his good hand.

Rich’s mind and cock shouted “Yes please” in unison. Fortunately his mouth said, “Let me help.”

“Damn it, Rich. This sucks! I’m so right-handed I can’t talk without it!”

“You’ll get through this.” Rich tugged the waist of the boxer briefs around until they were straight. The warm skin against his fingers sent his thoughts places they shouldn’t go. “You, ah, need to, ah…adjust anything?” Rich was thankful for the long shirt he wore today.

“Yeah.” Dan reached in his boxer briefs and arranged his cock.

If Rich could get through that, he could get through anything. Until he had to bend over to slip Dan’s sweatpants over his feet. His face was level with the object of most of his erotic dreams and fantasies.

The outline of Dan’s cock stared at him, almost daring him to mouth it to hardness through the soft cotton. Dan’s musky smell made him dizzy. Rich’s wayward imagination was playing tricks. The signs of growing arousal had to be only in his mind. Dan’s hand on his shoulder snapped him out of his thoughts.

Steadying himself, Dan eased his feet into the pants.

Rich rose as he tugged the clothes up Dan’s long legs. Grabbing the zippered sweatshirt, he slipped the sleeve on Dan’s left arm. He draped the warm material over his right before he zipped Dan’s injured hand inside the shirt. The intimate contact added fuel to his already aching desire.

“All done but the footwear!” Rich announced. “Come on.” He motioned his friend out of the bathroom.

With his erection forcing a slight limp, Rich followed Dan back into the room. Kneeling at his friend’s feet didn’t make things any better. By the time he was done tying the sneakers, Rich’s cock was so hard he hurt. He would have to do something about it when they got to the house. Not what he wanted to do about it, of course. Suddenly, living in close quarters with Dan didn’t sound as good as he first thought.

Chapter Two

Rich was glad for Dan’s silence on the ride home. His hard-on distracted him. The close quarters of the warm truck didn’t help. Dan’s scent seemed to fill the cab.

“Thanks,” Dan blurted out.

“It’s nothing.”

Dan’s thanks weren’t necessary, but knowing him as well as he did, his friend needed to say it. He never took anything for granted, especially his friends.

Rich pulled into the carport beside Dan’s truck. A smile threatened as Dan awkwardly opened the passenger door with his left hand, cursing under his breath the entire time.

“You know you were lucky. You could’ve been killed.” Rich didn’t move. His desire warred with the relief of getting Dan home—as if the small feat signaled the end of his nightmare.

“I know.”

With a shudder from more than the cold, Rich opened his door. “It’s cold out here. Let’s get inside.”

* * * * *

Rich followed his friend into his bedroom.

Dan eased down on the bed with a sigh. Exhaustion showed in his pale features.

“Why don’t you take a nap? You don’t look like you’ve had much rest.”

Dan toed off his shoes. “Didn’t. Damn nurses. Every time I’d get to sleep, they’d come in to check something. Knew they were doing it to be a pain in the ass. Maybe a nap is a good idea.” Unzipping his jacket, Dan shrugged it off his shoulder. With the sleeve stuck on his wrist, he looked up with helpless frustration.

Rich tugged the jacket off, freeing his friend.

The light patch of hair on the lean-muscled chest tempted his fingers. Tiny flat nipples made his mouth water. He turned his back to Dan to set the jacket on a chair, hoping the other man would slide under the covers in his sweatpants. No such luck.

“I can’t sleep in these things.” Dan’s voice was tight with pain and exhaustion.

When Rich turned around, his friend had stood and was pulling at the waist of his pants. Keeping his sigh inside, Rich pulled the soft material down Dan’s long legs.

Dan sat on the bed, allowing Rich to pull the pants over his feet. His awkward crawl into the bed left the blankets askew.

Leaning over, Rich grinned as he straightened the covers for him. “Looks like you’re gonna keep me busy. I’ll wake you in time for supper.”

Dan smiled in return when Rich tucked the covers up around his neck.

A strong urge to crawl in beside Dan, reassure himself he was okay, took hold. “You scared me,” Rich said instead, his smile fading.

“Scared me too,” Dan said with a wry smile. “Bad.”

Nodding, Rich left his friend to sleep.

* * * * *

Sleep wasn’t so easy. Dan’s broken hand burned with a deep, searing pain and he ached all over. He should have asked Rich for some of the painkillers he’d picked up at the pharmacy on the way home.

Rich looked as tired as Dan felt. As soon as he left him, Rich had probably passed out in the other bedroom. Dan hated to wake him up.

Pain wasn’t the only thing interfering with his sleep. His thoughts kept drifting back to the hospital bathroom. Not for the first time thoughts of touching Rich flitted through his mind. His friend’s hands on him—helping him dress—pulled those thoughts out from where he’d hidden them.

Dan couldn’t think about Rich that way. It wasn’t right. Regardless of right or wrong, his cock twitched and hardened at the memory of Rich bending over to help him with his sweats. Rich’s face had been so close, Dan swore he’d felt the heat of Rich’s breath on his dick.

Dan willed the thoughts and the hard-on to go away, for sleep to take him. When neither worked, his thoughts turned to Sharon.

She was one kinky bitch in the bedroom. The things she’d done to him had blown his mind. The first time she’d stuck her finger in his ass, she had his cock halfway down her throat. He had been too far gone to object, and then she’d hit something and he’d come like a rocket on blastoff. When he floated down from orbit, his mind was too dazed to tell her not to do it again. And the next time was as good as the first.

One night after she’d gone home, his sleeping mind wondered what it would be like to have more than her slender fingers in his ass. His dreams took a weird turn that night. Instead of Sharon’s small, soft hand, he’d dreamed of a large, calloused one around his cock. The hot flesh prodding his ass wasn’t slender and pointed but thick and blunt. Then Rich’s face appeared in his dream and Dan woke covered in cold sweat and hot come.

He’d had thoughts of Rich before, but nothing as vivid as his dream. Occasionally, when they’d shook hands or brushed against each other, his mind would flash a warped thought of pulling him close, holding him…or kissing him. He’d push the idea away as fast as it came at him. He didn’t think Rich would appreciate the weird ideas.

After the first dream, he’d tried to stop Sharon from playing with his ass. His thinking was if she quit, his dreams about Rich would end. But she knew he liked it. She also thought she could get her way—control him—using it.

The main thing she wanted—for him to leave law enforcement—he refused to give her, and even her rather considerable expertise in bed wouldn’t change his mind. Two months ago, after a huge argument, they broke up.

However, the dreams hadn’t gone away. Since then, he’d awakened many nights from dreams of a hard cock filling his ass, and Rich’s face was always there. The same man sleeping in the next room. The same man who would be staying here, helping him, sometimes intimately.

His right hand automatically reached for his aching flesh. His cast caught on the cover. Searing pain stabbed though him like a hot knife. Unfortunately the throbbing didn’t do much to wilt his hard-on. His left hand would have to pinch-hit. The ache in his shoulder from where the seat belt caught him caused another groan of pain.

“Fuck!” He winced at the sound of his voice. If Rich heard him and came in here… The sound of movement in the other room caused him to swear again.

* * * * *

“Dan?” Rich woke with a start. He hadn’t meant to doze off on the couch. He needed to get his system back on days. The only way to do it was to suffer through a sleepless day. “You okay?”

“I’m all right.” Dan’s voice didn’t sound all right.

Rich grabbed the bag of medicines Anna had prescribed as he headed to Dan’s room.

“I should have given you your meds earlier. Didn’t think.”

As he walked into the room, Dan fumbled with the covers.

Rich bent over then straighten them. The shades were down but enough afternoon sun snuck through to outline Dan’s obvious erection under the blankets. His friend blushed as Rich realized his problem wasn’t just pain.

“Guess that’d be a little difficult to deal with, seeing as you can’t talk without your right hand.” His own cock took notice of the situation. Long shirt, need more long shirts.

Dan’s blush grew deeper in the dim light of the room. Rich opened the bottle of painkillers then shook out a couple.

“Forgot the water,” he said as he handed them to Dan. Rich’s body flushed with a wave of heat. He maintained steady breathing until he left the room, but once out of Dan’s hearing, he exhaled hard.

“Fuck,” he whispered as he grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator. He opened the freezer and stuck his head in. “Gotta calm down,” he said to the icemaker as cold air washed over him. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

With one last frigid breath and a quick adjustment of a now-painful erection, Rich headed back to the bedroom. A swift glance told him the situation hadn’t taken care of itself.

Dan mouthed the pills off his hand then took the offered water. With his head back, gulping down the cold liquid, Dan revealed his throat.

Licking his lips, Rich wondered what it would be like to kiss a path from Dan’s chin to his Adam’s apple and beyond.

When Dan finished, he handed Rich the bottle of water. Rich needed to pour the icy liquid over his head, or better yet, his cock. Instead, he set it on the nightstand. He should leave and let Dan rest. He shouldn’t sit down on the bed next to Dan, but he did.

Lowering himself back on the pillow, Dan groaned—a mix of pain and desire.

The combination of needs battling in Dan’s eyes made the decision for him. Rich wondered if he was still on the couch, asleep and dreaming, as his hand smoothed the covers on Dan’s stomach.

His friend’s eyes rolled upward at the contact. A soft sigh of need made Rich move his hand lower.

His heart in his throat, Rich cupped the hard bulge beneath the soft covers.

Dan groaned as his hips arched toward the gentle contact.

Neither man spoke as Rich pressed a little harder, as Dan’s hips moved a little quicker. Their gazes didn’t meet when Rich pulled back the covers then slid his hand into the tight boxer briefs.

The heated flesh strained against Rich’s hand as he grasped it with a firm grip. He bit back a moan as he stroked the hard and hot flesh. His palm wanted to linger over each caress, memorize the feel and shape. His fingers itched to explore the texture of Dan’s balls. Even more, Rich wanted to lean over and taste the silky head and the slippery liquid glistening on the tip. But he couldn’t and it didn’t take Dan long.

A few sure strokes, a swipe of his thumb over the leaking slit and hot, sticky seed covered his hand and Dan’s stomach. The sound of Dan’s muffled groan almost made Rich come in his jeans.

Resisting the temptation to clean Dan’s stomach with his tongue, he released his tight hold on the spent cock. He wanted to run to the bathroom, jerk off using Dan’s semen as lubricant on his aching dick. Instead, he walked to the bathroom with a calm he didn’t feel. Once out of his friend’s sight, his tongue snuck a quick taste of the cooling liquid, letting the bitter taste imprint a memory to last a lifetime.

After running warm water on a washcloth, he returned to the bedroom.

Dan’s eyes were closed. He didn’t open them while Rich cleaned his stomach or straightened his boxer briefs. They stayed shut tight as Rich pulled the covers back over him. Pausing in the doorway to look at his silent best friend, Rich knew the appearance of sleep was just that.

* * * * *

Dan was grateful for Rich’s silence during dinner. He didn’t want to talk about what happened. His mind wasn’t near as cooperative as his friend because his thoughts couldn’t stay away from the intense incident.

He could still feel his friend’s hand around his cock—rough, calloused and confident. Nothing like any encounter he’d had with a woman. A twinge of regret startled him as he thought about how quick he’d lost it. He shouldn’t have wanted it to last longer. He shouldn’t have wanted it at all.

The crunching of gravel warned of a car on the driveway. He stood to get the door but Rich moved faster. Relief washed over Dan. Company would distract him from the endless cycle of thoughts about how good Rich’s hand felt.

“What are you doing here?”

Rich’s harsh tone startled Dan. It wasn’t like him to be rude.

“I could ask you the same question.” Sharon’s bitchy voice announced her visit. When she got started, her voice could peel paint.

Rich staggered back a little as Sharon pushed past him into the house.

As fast as lightning, her tone switched to sweetness and light. “Daniel, I’m so glad you’re okay. I came by to take care of you.”

“Rich is helping me out. I don’t need you.” As much as he wanted distraction from his thoughts, he didn’t want it to be her. Irrational as it was, he blamed her for the thoughts and feelings he couldn’t banish. “Please leave.”

“Why would I do that? Rich can’t take care of you like I can.” Her gaze raked down his body with obvious meaning.

Wouldn’t she be surprised? “I don’t need your help. I’m tired and don’t feel like dealing with you right now.”

“He asked you to leave, Sharon, so go.” Rich moved midway between them.

“You stay out of it, Richard Taylor!” Her dark eyes glittered with malice. “This is between me and my fiancé.”

“I’m not your fiancé. Never have been and never will be! We broke up, remember?” Normally Dan conquered Sharon’s attitude with a gentle hand, but right now he was too tired.

Her dark eyes narrowed and a frown creased her brow. Her chin tilted up in defiance. “We only broke up because I didn’t like you working in such a dangerous job.”

“And I still do, Sharon. I haven’t quit. And that wasn’t the only reason we broke up.”

“Of course it was, honey!” The sweetness of her voice didn’t match her expression.

Leave it to Sharon to forget the fighting and the jealousy. She went on without giving him a chance to remind her.

Her arms crossed in front of her. “Well, now that you have to quit, you can take the job at my daddy’s car lot.”

“Have to quit? What are you talking about?”

A gleeful smile spread across her full lips then vanished so fast Dan wasn’t sure he saw it. “Daniel, honey, that hand is never gonna work proper again. You can’t be a cop if you can’t handle a gun!”

Rich didn’t think Dan could have become any paler. He was wrong. He almost reached out to his injured friend as Dan swayed slightly, but Rich stopped himself.

“Anna never said anything like that.” Dan’s head shook back and forth. “She would have told me.”

“Of course she wouldn’t. She’s still sweet on you. She wouldn’t want the bad news to come from her. That’s why she’s sending you to that surgeon in Jackson.”

Rich forced down the urge to wrap his hands around Sharon’s throat. “Sharon, you’d better leave. Now.”

Rich’s tone gained her attention. When she glanced in his direction, her eyes held a tinge of fear.

Defiant in spite of him, she turned back to Dan. “I’ll go…for now. I’ll be back when your little watchdog isn’t here. And then we can discuss when to set the date.”

“Out!” Rich yelled in spite of his determination to remain calm.

She jumped, but at least she turned toward the door. Rich moved behind her, stayed between her and Dan until he had the door shut and locked with her on the other side. He leaned his forehead against it.

The surge of jealousy and protectiveness toward his friend startled him. He knew he had feelings for him, feelings of friendship, of lust, of love…for a friend. For a friend, his mind repeated.

A soft whimper made him turn. Rich had seen Dan cry twice in the dozen years they’d known each other—when he found out his parents were dead then at their funeral. Now it looked as if this might be the third time.

His eyes shimmered with welling moisture. Dan’s job was his life.

Never had Rich wanted to hit a woman until now. He wanted to hurt Sharon as much as her words hurt Dan.

Long strides closed the gap between Rich and his distraught friend. His arms slid around the trembling man.

The rough texture of Dan’s cast caught against the back of Rich’s T-shirt as Dan held on tight.

“She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.” Rich’s hands savored the hard muscles of Dan’s back as he rubbed soothing circles. A part of his mind rejoiced at the chance to hold him, but the reason diminished the pleasure.

“But what if she does? She has friends at the hospital. What if they told her something? I can’t be anything other than a cop. I don’t know how.”

“Anna would have been straight with you. She said the orthopedic surgeon was a precaution.” Rich pressed his lips against Dan’s hair. “Sharon’s just fucking with you.”

“What will I do if she’s right?” The sharp bite of teeth on Rich’s shoulder cut off an agonizing groan.

A jolt of desire surged through Rich’s cock.

Dan’s good hand fisted the back of Rich’s T-shirt in anguished frustration.

Rich needed to move before Dan noticed his rising interest. He eased back a little, putting a few inches’ distance between them. Unable to stop himself, Rich cupped Dan’s flushed jaw. His thumb rubbed along Dan’s cheekbone. “Look. She’s a bitch. She wanted to hurt you and she did a good job. We’re going to the surgeon tomorrow. He’ll be straight with you. You’ll see. It’ll all work out.”

With a long sigh, Dan looked up. His bloodshot eyes brightened. “I hope so.”

Rich wanted to kiss him so much it hurt. It wouldn’t take much effort. A tilt, a lean… For a split second, Rich thought Dan’s face moved forward a fraction.

He leaned back before he did something stupid. As if kissing Dan were any stupider than jerking him off. “Look, man, you’re tired and you gotta be hurting. Take your meds, get some sleep. We need to be up by five to get to Jackson by eight tomorrow anyway.”

An intense feeling of loss washed over him as Dan’s arms dropped from his waist. His friend nodded as he turned for the bedroom. Senseless hope filled Rich when Dan paused in the doorway then turned.

“I really need a bath. Would you wrap my arm?”

“Bath’s a good idea. It’ll help relax you. I’ll get the stuff.”

* * * * *

Dan sank into the hot water with a sigh. With his movements awkward and stilted, washing hadn’t been easy. It’d have to do. No way could he ask Rich to bathe him. The idea sent a jolt of desire through his groin. Time to change the subject.

As if the physical pain weren’t enough, Sharon had to make his heart hurt worse. The thought he might not be able to go back to his job never occurred to him. He could live with just about anything but not that. Tears stung his eyes. The sensation brought back the feeling of Rich’s arms around him.

His entire body flushed as he remembered Rich’s lips so close to his. Dan had almost leaned in and kissed him. In spite of Rich’s assistance this afternoon, his friend would probably break his other hand if he had. He didn’t know what he had been thinking…

Well, he did know. The strong arms around him felt good, felt safe. Since the accident, his dreams had been a confusing jumble of scenes from the wreck and of Rich. He remembered the deer, the upside-down roll of the car, the squawking of the radio. The panic in Rich’s voice on the radio mirrored Dan’s fear as his car tumbled down the embankment.

And a soft whisper. Stay alive for me. Tenderness laced those words. But had he dreamed them?

Rich insisted he take his pain meds before getting in the tub. Might not have been a good idea. Between the hot water and the pills, he was so sleepy. Leaning his head against the wall, his plastic-wrapped arm propped on the edge of the tub, Dan closed his eyes. Just for a minute. That’s all.

* * * * *

Rich sat on Dan’s bed listening to the sound of splashing water. He had to rethink his feelings for Dan. This was more than lust. Jealousy had spiked through him earlier at the mere thought of Sharon helping Dan. Something had changed. Or surfaced.

He’d been attracted to Dan for years and never acted on it. Dan’s friendship was too valuable. Coming out, making a move on Dan wasn’t worth the possibility of a buddy fuck. With the white-hot flash of jealous anger, Rich had crossed a line.

The splashing sounds stopped, replaced by gentle snoring. Rich smiled as he moved to the bathroom door.

“Dan? Dan!”

The snore hesitated with a snort then started again.

A gentle rap on the door didn’t get a response. He paused with his hand on the doorknob. Rich wasn’t sure he could handle a completely naked Dan, but he couldn’t let him sleep in the tub. He took a deep breath then opened the door.

At the sight of his weary friend, the surge of desire collided with a wave of tenderness.

Dan’s face, relaxed in sleep, looked peaceful and pain free. Only the plastic-covered cast perched precariously on the edge of the tub marred the picture with the truth. Dan’s head tilted back and a little to the side, his hair was a tousled wet mess. The edge of the water kissed at his nipples and flirted with the normally light-colored chest hair now darkened by dampness. His long, lean body couldn’t completely fit in the tub so his bent knees touched the sides. His open legs revealed a darkish patch of hair surrounding his half-erect cock.

Rich wondered what he was dreaming.

“Dan, wake up.” Maybe if he spoke louder than a mere whisper. “Dan.” Okay, he responded to that. Well, if turning his head the other direction qualified as a response.

Rich took a deep breath. Touching would be required. He had to keep the touching impersonal. Kneeling by the tub, he brushed a wet lock of hair off Dan’s forehead. That really wasn’t impersonal and not enough to wake him. Just get it over with.

“Dan, come on now,” he said as he shook the man’s shoulder. “Wake up and get out of the bath!”

“Rich?” Dan’s eyes opened enough for Rich to see the groggy, drugged-out look in his baby blues. “Hi, Rich.” Something about Dan’s smile was almost flirty.

Rich closed his eyes, willing his dick to think about something besides a wet, naked Dan. Wasn’t working. “You need to get out and get in bed.”

“Bed…” Dan’s eyes closed again.

“Wake up! You can’t sleep yet. You have to get out of the tub and dry first.”

“Uh-huh…” The sound morphed into a snore.

Rich rolled his eyes to the ceiling in a silent prayer for strength. “Come on…” He reached over then grasped Dan’s good arm. “Get up.”

Slowly Dan responded to the gentle tugging. It took some doing, but Rich eased Dan out of the bath without anything other than water damage to his clothes. He tried to get a towel around his woozy friend only to wind up with a slippery, wet body pressed against him. And Dan’s cock seemed very interested in the proceedings. Rich’s jumped for joy at the idea of a playmate.

“Okay, let’s try this a different way.”

Rich leaned over and dropped the lid of the toilet with one hand while holding an armful of naked, wet Dan with his other arm. Pulling Dan around, he sat him on the toilet. For his friend’s modesty and his own sanity, Rich draped a towel over Dan’s lap before he dried him.

He wanted to use his tongue instead of a towel. Lingering was a bad idea. Arousal raced through his body at high speed and temptation taunted him. Dan was out of his head on the medication. Acting on his desire would be like taking advantage of a drunk. Unfortunately his dick had no scruples. By the time Dan was dry, Rich was hard and aching.

“Come on, Danny boy.” Rich hauled him up from his throne. Hardness pressed against his hip when Dan leaned into his grip. Keeping the towel around Dan’s waist became an act of sheer will. His friend seemed to think it was funny as they stumbled into the bedroom.

“Will you stop giggling?” Rich couldn’t understand what he’d done to deserve the torment of the stoned, horny, totally off-limits man clinging to him.

“I don’t giggle.” Dan’s words ended in another giggle.

“Man, I don’t know what Anna gave you, but I’m gonna need some soon. And how the hell can you be so…so…” he glanced down at the bulge in Dan’s towel, “and be so stoned? You’d think that shit would relax you.”

“I’m relaxed…” Dan managed to fall on his good arm as he toppled onto the bed. “Just my dick’s not.” The towel flopped open. Dan pointed to his problem. Dazed blue eyes looked up at Rich. “Touch me?” The words were a slurred whisper. “Please…”

“Dan…” Rich’s body screamed yes as his head shook no.

“Please…”

Rich closed his eyes with a sigh. When he opened them, Dan’s heavy-lidded eyes stared at him, full of want.

Biting his lip, Rich nodded. How could he refuse? The long, lean body spread out in front of him was a dream come true. He’d wanted Dan for years. Who wouldn’t? The guy was sex on legs. However, he’d convinced himself there was no way his very heterosexual friend would want him. In spite of his misgivings, he couldn’t stop himself.

“Move over.” His voice was hoarse with his own desire.

With awkward movements, Dan scooted to the middle of the wide bed.

On a hunch, Rich pulled open the nightstand drawer. Sure enough, there was a small bottle of lotion next to a box of condoms. He grabbed the bottle before he stretched out next to his friend. As much as he wanted to shed his clothes, feel the expanse of naked skin against his own, he stayed dressed.

With a good measure of lotion on one hand, he reached for Dan’s swollen cock. If this was all he could get from his friend, he wanted to make it good. Lying on his side with one arm propping his head, he watched Dan’s face as he gripped the hot flesh. A long, slow stroke ended with a slight twist of his palm over the sensitive crown.

“Oh yes…” Dan’s eyes closed with a moan as his hips arched upward. “Oh God, yes…”

It was Rich’s turn to moan as Dan moved closer, his good hand fisting the front Rich’s shirt. Damp hair teased Rich’s lips into caressing.

His own cock ached for release as Dan’s hip brushed against it. Rich flexed his hips, pressing against the lean flesh as his hand stroked his friend. His thumb teased the crown with each firm caress.

“Feels so…” Dan bit his lower lip, stopping his words.

Rich almost leaned over to help Dan nibble on the full lip. Instead, he let Dan’s hair absorb his moan.

“Faster…” Dan’s hips moved to emphasize his plea.

Rich’s hips moved in sync with his hand, pushing against Dan with each stroke.

Dan moved closer, almost encouraging Rich to rub against him. The arm propping Rich’s head abandoned its duties and slid under Dan’s neck. Pulling him closer still, Rich buried his face in the damp hair. Soon there wasn’t enough room between them for water to flow.

Rich’s lips ghosted across Dan’s hair and found his forehead. Gentle kisses feathered across the passion-creased brow.

“Yes…yes…yes…” Dan’s fervent words cut short as Rich’s hungry lips found his.

Dan’s mouth opened for him, his neck straining upward, lips hard against Rich’s. Hot tongues met as sticky heat covered Rich’s hand.

Groans mingled as Rich’s aching release spread against his skin, trapped in the confines of his jeans. The hunger slowed to gentle nips of lips as Rich held Dan’s trembling body. His hand milked Dan’s cock with slow, lazy strokes.

Rich knew it was inevitable, but sadness overwhelmed him when Dan tensed in his arms. He shouldn’t have held him so close. He definitely shouldn’t have kissed him. A friendly hand job was one thing. A tonsil-searching kiss was completely different. Rich pulled away from him.

“Sleep, Dan. Just sleep.” Rich would deal with the repercussions later.

Chapter Three

Rich didn’t sleep more than a couple of hours. His mind kept running the memory of last night like a well-worn home video. He stared at his hand in the dim light shining from the living room lamp.

Twice in less than a day he’d wrapped it around Dan’s cock. The feel of it imprinted on his palm. The smooth feel of the head, the swollen veins running the length, and the flare of the crown had his mind in turmoil. He couldn’t imagine what was going through Dan’s thoughts. He wasn’t sure what kind of reception awaited him this morning.

The clock glared four forty-nine. He’d been dressed and ready to leave since four. No sense lying in bed any longer. Sleep wasn’t happening. Eleven minutes until he had to wake Dan. The orthopedist office in Jackson was sixty miles away. Sixty miles of time to talk or uncomfortable silence. He wondered which as he headed for Dan’s bedroom door.

* * * * *

In spite of his drug-induced sleep from the night before, Dan slept all the way to Jackson. Rich was grateful because he had no idea what to say. Fortunately, the quiet waiting room didn’t encourage talking.

The appointment was supposed to be at eight but it was almost noon and the doctor had yet to show. Rich was impatient to get this over with. He wanted the doctor to reassure his friend. That cold-hearted bitch Sharon had really upset him.

Dan’s distress had hurt Rich more than he realized. Rich bit his lip as he thought about last night. He had wanted so much more, still did. So much he ached inside.

Rich had never been in love. Never even kidded himself into thinking he was. He had heard it described in so many ways and none of them fit what he was feeling now. Sick. That’s what he felt, a nauseating feeling in the pit of his stomach, a slow ache deep in his chest. And the ache spread. Breathing became difficult. Rich couldn’t be in love with Dan. Not possible. He chanced a wild-eyed glance at his friend. Dan seemed engrossed in the news playing on the television in the corner.

Rich shook himself out of his thoughts. “What is the holdup with the damn doctor?”

Dan watched Rich stand then stalk over to the receptionist’s desk. He didn’t know what to say to him. Rich bought his sleeping act on the trip here, or if he didn’t, he hadn’t said anything. They needed to talk. Dan needed to apologize, but how?

The whole thing seemed dreamlike. He’d been dreaming in the tub of Rich’s arms around him, and then he was there. Reality didn’t come into focus until he was lying on his bed with Rich’s mouth on his. Of course it could have something to do with the drugs. Although the way his body reacted, thinking about it couldn’t be blamed on the meds. He’d been half hard since he woke this morning.

He couldn’t get the memory of Rich’s lips out of his mind. The taste of his mouth, the feel of his tongue was almost more exciting than Rich’s rough hand on his cock. Together… God, he had to stop thinking about it. A hard-on in the doctor’s office wasn’t the best of ideas.

Rich argued in a low tone with the receptionist. Dan couldn’t quite make out what he was saying. When he turned abruptly, Dan resumed his unseeing stare at the television.

* * * * *

“This is bullshit,” Rich mumbled as he entered the motel lobby.

The doctor never showed. He had been stuck in emergency surgery during the morning then his hospital rounds ran long in the afternoon.

Rich nearly blew when the receptionist told them they would have to come back tomorrow morning at seven. He was too tired to consider driving home and then back again tomorrow.

Dan looked completely wiped out. A motel was the only answer. They hadn’t brought any clothes, but at least Rich thought to throw Dan’s meds in the glove box before they left. A hasty stop at the local Wal-Mart took care of toiletries and some clean underwear.

“I need a room for one night,” he said to the clerk, laying his credit card on the counter. “Two beds,” he added hastily. Two rooms would be better. But he didn’t say it aloud. “You have phone numbers for restaurants that deliver?”

“Sure thing, sir.”

The clerk looked so young and being called “sir” made Rich feel old. Old and alone. Being thirty-five and alone never bothered him before. He had friends, not many close ones but some. His mom, his brother and his brother’s family lived in Knoxville. He visited on a regular basis. Jeremy was always happy to see him when he visited him in Memphis.

He hadn’t thought about growing old alone. He hadn’t met anyone who made him want something different. Even his dreams of Dan were just jerk-off fantasies. He never thought of wanting more. Until now.

“Sir?”

Rich pulled himself out of his thoughts.

The clerk held the takeout menus and his credit card.

“Yeah, thanks.”

* * * * *

Rich stared at the dark ceiling. As tired as he was, he couldn’t sleep. They’d spent the evening pretending to be engrossed in pizza and TV. Awkwardness was the rule of the day, even more so when they undressed.

Uneven breathing from the other bed let him know Dan was probably counting his own ceiling tiles.

“You asleep?” Dan’s voice startled a small gasp from Rich’s mouth.

“No.” The darkness swallowed his word.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?” Dan’s words bewildered Rich. If anything, he should be apologizing for taking advantage of his drugged friend.

“I shouldn’t have asked you to do that.”

“I shouldn’t have done it.”

“Why did you?” Dan’s tone was confused.

“I wanted to.” Being honest was easier in the dark.

“You did?”

Rich smiled at the slight squeak in Dan’s voice. “Yes.”

“You’ve done it before? I mean, before yesterday.”

A lump in his throat formed, aching as he swallowed past it. “Yes.” He could almost hear Dan’s mind spinning, trying to find an answer, or maybe another question.

“With other men.” It wasn’t a question.

Rich decided not to answer.

“Why?” The word croaked out.

Rich imagined the disapproval, the disgust on his friend’s face. “Why do you think?” He hadn’t meant the question to come out so harsh. All he could think about was losing his friend. The friend he was in love with. Sharp pain shot through his chest.

“You’re gay.”

The expected condemnation wasn’t there. “Yes.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Dan sounded hurt, not disgusted.

“It’s not like it ever came up. We don’t exactly discuss our sex lives.” And that was true. Dan wasn’t the kiss-and-tell kind of guy. He never bragged about his girlfriends or his sexual exploits.

“But that’s different.”

“Oh, and I was just supposed to work it into the conversation?” Rich’s voice turned sarcastic. “Hey, Dan, how’d you like that basketball game last night and, oh, by the way, I like to suck dick.” The sarcasm faded as he continued. “Not exactly a normal topic of conversation.”

The snort of amusement from the next bed released some of the tension binding Rich’s chest. Maybe he wouldn’t lose his friend after all. Dan had never voiced an opinion on homosexuality, but Rich had never heard him condemn anyone for being different.

“You do?” The amusement turned to surprise.

“It’s something most gay men do.” It was Rich’s turn to laugh.

“Oh…” A slight whimper followed the word.

“You need another pill?” Rich tried to remember how many pain pills Dan had taken when they arrived at the room.

“No.” The word came out sharp. Dan’s breaths were short and rapid.

“Need something else?” In for a penny, in for a pound. The old saying popped into his head as he made the offer. The silence made up Rich’s mind for him. “If I come over there, are you going to punch me?”

“No.” The word stretched into a moan.

Rich rolled to the edge of the mattress. The beds were so close only one of Rich’s feet touched the floor as he joined Dan.

A tiny shaft of light slivered through the drapes and highlighted Dan’s face. Lust and confusion battled in his eyes. Dan’s breath was reduced to shallow pants. His brow creased in a frown.

Rich crawled over the bed until he was on hands and knees above Dan. “You want me to show you how much I like sucking cock?”

Dan’s hips arched upward against the blankets held tight by Rich’s position.

“You want me to show you how much I want your cock?”

Again Dan’s body strained upward seeking contact Rich refused to provide.

Rich rose up on his knees then peeled the covers off Dan’s torso. This time Rich wanted to feel his skin, to taste every square inch of his body. He didn’t know if this would ever happen again. Dan was too into women but evidently curious enough to experiment. Rich wanted as much out of tonight as he could. The memories might have to last a lifetime.

His fingers traced lines across the well-toned chest below him. No soft curves for Rich. He reveled in the feel of the muscled lines. From the smooth skin near the shoulder to the fur on Dan’s chest, gentle caresses and soft kneading alternated with rougher pinches.

The passion-filled sounds carried on the darkness were music to Rich. An erotic melody of gasps and moans wove through the air, punctuated by half-whispered words of encouragement.

Dan’s body arched upward again as Rich leaned over him, but still Rich avoided giving Dan the pressure he sought. Dan’s good hand gripped the bedding, the cast on his injured one tapped impatiently on the bed.

With his gaze focused on Dan’s lips, Rich bent to touch his own to them. Dan turned his face away. Disappointed but not discouraged, Rich spread kisses along the side of the stubble-covered jaw. He suckled at an earlobe before his tongue left wet trails down to the smoother flesh of the neck.

His legs still trapped by Rich’s knees and the blankets, Dan writhed in torment as Rich found a hardened tiny nipple. “Oh God…”

The breathless moan caused Rich to smile into the crinkly hair on Dan’s chest. Still Dan’s hand refused to move from the twisted bedding.

With a soft sigh, Rich realized this would be a one-way encounter. Dan wasn’t going to participate. He allowed the regret to wash over him then pushed it away.

Moving off Dan’s legs, Rich yanked the remaining covers off so hard they fell to the floor. Before Dan could change his mind, Rich knelt between his legs and resumed his journey down the hard lines of flesh. Tonguing the shallow navel sent Dan’s now-freed legs around Rich’s ribs with bone-cracking strength.

This time the moan wasn’t Dan’s. Rich let the strong limbs pull him down against the heat of Dan’s cock. Hips pushed up, pressing the hard ridge of flesh into Rich’s chest. Rich’s arms slid under the lean waist as he buried his face in the taut stomach. Dan’s moan vibrated through his skin.

As if he realized what he was doing, Dan’s legs loosened their grip on Rich and slid down to the bed.

With a sigh of regret, Rich moved lower to the cotton-covered hard-on. The wet spot on the material was his first stop. A thorough tonguing left the material moist with saliva and Dan’s juices.

With slow, careful movements, Rich pulled the elastic waistband over the swollen cock. He kept pulling as he rose on his knees. Dan’s legs lifted in the air in front of him as he stripped the briefs down the long, lean legs.

His cock ached with a fierceness he hadn’t thought possible. The position Dan was in, his hips canted up, his legs against Rich’s chest… It would be simple to push his aching erection against the tiny puckered hole. Simple but stupid. Dan was expecting a mouth on his cock, not a dick in his ass.

As if Dan could read his thoughts, his legs slid quickly back to the bed. The small glare of light revealed lust and fear on Dan’s face.

Rich swallowed the lump in his throat as he gave a quick yank to his balls. He was too close to coming at the thought of Dan’s ass, of what it would be like tight around his dick. Rich reached for Dan’s swollen flesh, giving it long, slow strokes. “You like this?”

“Oh God…” A gasp of air then, “Yes…”

“I want to lick you.” Rich bent over to run his tongue around the crown.

“Yes…” The whimper was barely audible.

“Taste your balls.” His tongue teased down the thick vein on the underside of Dan’s cock, stopping at his testicles.

“Yes…”

Rich stretched out on the bed between Dan’s legs. Sliding one hand under Dan’s ass, he suckled the tight sac.

“Yes…” The gasp exploded from Dan’s mouth.

Rich continued to tease the wrinkled scrotum with his tongue, his hand working Dan’s cock with slow, teasing movements. With gentle suction, he pulled one of the tight balls into his mouth.

“Shit…”

Dan’s hand released the sheets then flailed in the air with its wounded twin.

For a second Rich thought Dan would reach for him. Sadness swept through him when the frantic hand grabbed the pillow under Dan’s head. His disappointment didn’t stop Rich from tormenting the tightening balls with his mouth. His fingers pressed into Dan’s perineum as his tongue bathed his scrotum.

“Rich…” The desperation in Dan’s voice made Rich’s balls contract.

“What, Danny? Are you okay?” Concern for his injured friend dampened the heat of his arousal for a brief moment.

Dan’s long, throaty moan wasn’t pain. “Yes… Okay… I’m okay.” He rolled his hips, pushing into Rich’s fingers. “More…”

More? Rich’s breath caught. Would Dan be willing to go further than just a blowjob?

Wetting his finger with spit, Rich slid it down between Dan’s ass cheeks. With a gentle circling motion, he teased the puckered hole.

“Oh God—”

Rich couldn’t believe Dan’s cry was from fear. Not when his friend’s body pushed against his finger, accepting the intrusion with an eagerness that surprised Rich. Pressing a little harder, Rich’s finger slid past the tight muscle. His other hand worked Dan’s leaking cock with long strokes.

“More—” Dan’s whispered word cut short as if he hadn’t meant to let it out.

Only too happy to comply, Rich’s finger pushed past the initial resistance. Dan arched upward as Rich searched for his prostate. Wishing for lube rather than spit, Rich found what he was looking for then pressed against the hard knot of nerves.

“Oh God, yes—” The strangled cry confirmed his target. “Please…” Dan’s uninjured hand reached for Rich but stopped just short of touching him.

Rich rotated his finger, trying to loosen the tight muscle. Without proper lube, he didn’t want to try for a second finger, but Dan didn’t seem to care. His body met every stroke as Rich fingered him. Rich kept his grip on Dan’s cock light and his movement slow. Much more and this incredible encounter would be over.

“Please, Rich. I need to come…”

Rich could see moisture on Dan’s face glistening in the light from the window. He didn’t know if it was sweat or tears, but he took pity on his confused friend. His mouth descended on his cock, swallowing him deep. Bucking hips would have gagged him if he hadn’t expected the motion.

Rich’s mouth slid up with a slow glide until his lips circled the head. His tongue swiped at the brief gush of fluid before he plunged again. Dan’s moans grew louder—his cries hoarse, throaty. A few more strokes of his hungry mouth and eager finger were all it took.

The first spurt of creamy release caught him deep in the throat. The second flowed across his tongue as he drank from his friend. His own dick ached for more, for Dan’s touch, Dan’s hand stroking him.

The spent cock slipped from Rich’s mouth. He yanked off his briefs. Crawling up his friend’s shuddering frame, he planted feverish kisses as he went. Lining Dan’s semi-hard shaft with his aching flesh, he pressed his weight onto his friend’s body. One arm slid under Dan, his hand coming up his back to grasp Dan’s shoulder. The other found Dan’s short hair, pulling his face closer.

Dan’s good hand gripped the back of Rich’s neck, pulling his head down.

Rich whimpered as their lips met. Slick tongues and hungry lips ravaged each other as Rich pressed his body against Dan, his aching cock caught between them. He moaned his pleasure as Dan pushed back.

“Yes… You feel so good…” Rich sobbed the words between kisses. Dan’s legs wrapped around him. “So good…”

He buried his face in Dan’s neck as his seed erupted between their tightly pressed bodies. “So good… Want you so much…” Rich managed to bite back what he really wanted to say. The taste of blood from his lip foreshadowed the pain he feared tonight’s actions would bring.

* * * * *

The incessant ringing of the phone finally penetrated Rich’s sleep-deprived brain. He managed to reach the handset without moving from the warm spot in the bed.

“What?”

A computer voice cheerfully announced his wake-up call.

The receiver clattered as he tried to put it back in the cradle. His hand moved down the arm around his waist to find the rough edge of Dan’s cast. His eyes popped open as last night’s escapades flooded his mind in vivid color.

Warm skin lining his back and the hot breath on his shoulder combined with the X-rated memories caused his cock to twitch with interest. Dan’s morning erection pressed against his naked ass made him gasp with sudden arousal.

They had fallen asleep almost as soon as he had rolled off Dan last night. He should have moved to the other bed first, but instead, he’d leaned over the bed to retrieve the blankets. Cleaning their stomachs with hasty swipes of Dan’s underwear, Rich barely settled under the covers before they both passed out.

Dan shifted behind him. Rich couldn’t stop his body from pressing back against the heat. Dan’s cock fit in the crack of his ass like a knife fit its sheath. Another push brought an equal but opposite response. He moved again and Dan met his backward thrust.

Rich would kill for lube and a condom right now. Soon a slow rhythm developed, gentle push met gentle thrust. The arm on his waist tightened, the cast biting into the flesh of his stomach. His fingers tightened on Dan’s forearm as a soft moan escaped Rich’s lips.

“Yes…”

A soft whimper preceded teeth raking his shoulder as Dan’s body moved faster, pressing harder against him. The base of the hard flesh teased his asshole.

“Yes… Yesyesyes…” Rich’s hand moved from Dan’s arm to his aching cock. “Please…” Rich’s rapid breath matched the cadence of their bodies. His strokes fell in step.

An eternity passed in an instant until hot spurts of sticky liquid smeared against his back. With a growl, teeth bit Rich’s shoulder hard enough to bruise.

Moaning, Rich came, a hard gush of heat covering his hand. The warmth of Dan’s body rolled away then the bed jiggled as Dan got up. Before Rich could say or do anything, the bathroom door closed behind his friend.

Did last night mean anything to Dan other than curiosity? Was this morning nothing more than taking advantage of a warm body and a morning hard-on?

Too late, Rich realized what it meant to him.

Chapter Four

The drive home was quiet but Dan didn’t consider it comfortable.

The doctor reassured him about his injury. The fingers were well set and should heal nicely. His mobility, as long as he was careful over the next few weeks, would be fine. The relief over his prognosis helped dispel some of the anxiety he had over the sudden change in his and Rich’s friendship.

He decided his sudden passion for Rich’s touch was because of the accident. Near-death experiences had a way of making people act different. He thought he was going to die when his car flipped. He hadn’t and now the unsure status of his future, his job, was resolved. Things could go back to the way they were.

Of course, before he didn’t know Rich was gay. Did it make any difference now that he knew? It shouldn’t. Rich was gay before the accident. Wasn’t he? Well, of course he was. He said he’d been with other men. No one gives a blowjob like that on the first try.

An irrational jolt of anger ran through Dan at the thought of Rich’s mouth on someone else’s cock. Why should that make him angry? A sick feeling settled in the pit of his stomach.

“You okay?”

Rich’s voice startled him as he realized a gasp had accompanied the sick feeling.

“Yeah…” The lie didn’t sound convincing to Dan, but Rich seemed to accept it. He didn’t want Rich to be with other men. Did that mean he didn’t like the fact Rich was gay? He thought about the women Rich had dated. Frowning, Dan shook his head slightly. Rich had dated—women.

His mind delved through his memories. It had been months since Rich went out with anyone. Dan couldn’t even dredge up her name. They had only gone out a few times. It wasn’t unusual though. Rich never dated anyone for very long, never got serious.

He managed to suppress the “duh” as it popped into his head. Rich was gay. He wouldn’t get serious about a woman. But would he use them for show?

“Rich…” Crap, how was he supposed to ask?

“Yeah.”

“Did you ever, you know…” Dan could feel the blush spread across his face. He couldn’t finish his sentence.

“Ever what?”

Dan stared out the window for a few seconds. Might as well finish the question. Maybe a different way. “You date women.”

“Yeah, occasionally,” Rich laughed.

Dan grimaced when he didn’t explain further. “But… You’re…” Why couldn’t he say it? It was easier last night in the darkness. Dan rolled his eyes. A lot of things were easier in the dark.

“Gay,” Rich finished for him.

“Yeah.”

At the sound of Rich’s chuckle, Dan glanced over at his friend. Rich’s eyes were on the road in front of them.

“Why? I mean, if you’re…” Damn it. He would have to say it someday.

“Gay.” Rich laughed again. “I go out with women I like as friends. I don’t sleep with them.”

“Have you ever?” Dan bit his lip and winced. He couldn’t believe he asked. The words just jumped out of his mouth.

“Yes, a long time ago.”

“Didn’t you like it?”

Rich glanced at him for a second, amusement crinkling the skin around his eyes before he concentrated on the road again.

“It was okay. It was sex. I got off. But it just confirmed what I’ve known all my life. I like men.”

“Are you seeing someone?”

“Not on a regular basis, but yes.”

White-hot anger filled Dan. He didn’t know where it was coming from but he couldn’t make it stop. “Who?” The word came out sharp, the anger leaking around the edge of his voice.

Rich glanced at him, his gaze curious, before he stared at the road again. “No one you know. He doesn’t live here.”

He doesn’t live here. Thoughts of Rich’s trips to Memphis flooded his mind. Rich had friends there. He went to visit every few months. Dan never thought twice about it until now. He didn’t even know the name of these friends. Rich never really talked about his trips. Sometimes he’d mention a game he’d attended or bar he had visited while there but nothing specific about the “friends”.

The truck bounced as it left the highway for the uneven dirt road up to Dan’s house. Distracted, he hadn’t realized they were home already. The conversation ended as Rich’s truck pulled into the carport next to his.

* * * * *

Rich went straight to the guestroom when they walked in the house. Dan’s questions and responses to his answers confused him. Dan sounded angry over him seeing someone.

Rich had been friends with Jeremy for years. They were more than friends—they were friends with “benefits”. He’d never considered Jeremy anything more. Their relationship was convenient for both of them. Jeremy wasn’t the type of guy looking to settle down into a long-term relationship. He was, in some ways, still in the closet. Much the same as Rich. Not advertising was easier on their careers.

Jeremy was a detective with the Memphis Police Department. In a testosterone-driven environment like law enforcement, it was simpler not to be too open about being gay, especially in the South. But unlike Rich, all of Jeremy’s close friends knew he was gay. Even his partner and several people in his squad knew.

Nearly three months had passed since Rich had visited Jeremy. He’d planned to go next weekend until Dan’s accident. Maybe he should go anyway. Dan should be accustomed to his one-handed state by then. The doctor said he could have limited use of his thumb and forefinger within a week or so. Rich would love to talk to Jeremy about Dan and the events of the last few days. There was no one else he could.

“Damn…” He forgot to call Jeremy and tell him about the accident. Jeremy had said something about getting tickets to a concert. Rich should give him a heads-up if he might not be able to make it.

He pressed a few numbers on his speed dial and waited for the connection.

* * * * *

Dan watched the door of the spare bedroom swing almost closed. He wanted to finish their conversation before his bravado wore off. The idea of Rich with someone, doing the things he’d done to him to someone else, upset him. Did to him…

Rich had done things to him and received nothing in return. Was this friend from Memphis willing to do those things to Rich?

A jolt of desire as powerful as an electrical current rushed through him. The memory of Rich’s lips on his, their tongues twisting and moans mingling made his knees weak.

Damn it! Rich was gay, Dan wasn’t. He didn’t want Rich’s kisses. He shouldn’t want anything from Rich. That’s the conversation they needed to have. The one where Dan told Rich it wouldn’t happen again. That’s the conversation they would have.

Dan stormed over to the bedroom door intent on settling this once and for all. The sound of Rich’s voice carried through the slightly open door.

“I don’t know, Jer. I really have to wait until I know he can get around without help. I was looking forward to next weekend. And I really need to talk to you about something.”

Dan couldn’t breathe as he waited to hear Rich’s response to the person on the other end of the line.

“Yeah. You could say something’s come up.”

Another pause.

“Yeah. Better than I expected. Way better.” Rich laughed after another pause. “I don’t think so, but I need someone to talk to.”

Dan peered through the crack in the door. Rich was sitting on the bed. His fingers plucked at the blanket with nervous energy.

“Well, you’ll just have to use your right hand. Of course you’ve never had a problem finding relief in other ways!” Rich’s laugh startled him away from the opening. “Okay… Yeah, me too. Later.”

Dan fled to the other side of the room. He couldn’t let Rich know he’d overheard his conversation. Jer… The nickname didn’t tell him much. The whole conversation didn’t tell him much except Rich had plans to go to Memphis next weekend. Which he canceled because of him.

Irrational pleasure coursed through Dan at the thought of keeping Rich away from his… His what? His boyfriend? His lover? Lover… The word sent Dan into another roller coaster of emotional confusion.

“What’s wrong?” Rich’s voice caused him to jump.

“Nothing.”

“Doesn’t look like nothing.”

“Who were you talking to?” The words jumped out of nowhere. He sounded like a jealous lover. Oh fuck. Dan couldn’t look at Rich. He couldn’t be near him right now. “Never mind. I need some air. I’ll be back.”

* * * * *

Dan stumbled unseeing down the dirt road that led away from his house. Jealousy had never been a problem for him. When the women he dated tried to make him jealous, it never worked. However, if he thought about it, only Sharon had ever tried to provoke him. It was one item on a long list leading to their breakup. She wanted a man she could control. Whether through sex or mind games, it didn’t matter as long as she had the upper hand.

A shiver ran through his body, shaking him from his thoughts. When he looked around, he was nearly a quarter of a mile away from the house. Without a coat. Stupid. One dumb move after another with Rich.

A deep breath of cold air didn’t clear his head. He had to be honest with himself.

A hard shiver racked his body. He had to get back to the house.

Turning to head back up the road, he saw Rich walking toward him in the distance, carrying Dan’s coat. He walked slowly toward the approaching man. If he were honest with himself, Dan would have to admit he liked what Rich did to him.

The calloused hands touching him, the eager lips on his skin—and his cock—the moist tongue tasting him. But he was a guy, his mind argued. Sex, however unexpected the source, was something most guys didn’t turn down.

“Stupid,” he mumbled as he slowed his steps. He wasn’t that kind of man. If he were, he would have slept with all the women he dated, or at least tried, and he hadn’t.

Why did his very masculine friend make his heart beat harder and his cock ache for attention? And why now? He’d known Rich for over twelve years. Why all of a sudden?

Heat flushed through him in spite of the cold. Dreams of Rich didn’t compare to the reality of last night. And this morning. This morning was all his doing. He couldn’t blame Rich for that.

Dan hadn’t thought when he woke up next to the lean, warm body. He’d just acted. Rubbing his cock against Rich’s ass, the moans and desperate pleas from his friend—it was too much. Even now desire coursed through him, dispelling the cold. Not just his cock but his heart ached.

The honest truth was he wanted Rich, wanted to touch him, wanted to kiss him, wanted him in every way he could think of and some he wasn’t sure were possible. His feelings scared him as nothing, including his accident, ever had. His feet stopped moving him forward.

Bitter wind whipped around the figure of his friend as Rich walked toward him. The bright red of chilled flesh showed on his face even at a distance. Why had he stopped? Rich’s feet carried him faster down the rough incline.

“Dan?” He folded the coat around his friend. His arms stayed as Dan’s cold hand slid around his waist and into the warmth of Rich’s coat. Chilled flesh burrowed into his neck. “What’s wrong, Dan?”

“I can’t do this. I can’t—I’m not…but…”

His friend shivered with more than cold. Outside in the icy cold was not the place to discuss it. He needed to get Dan inside and warm.

“You don’t have to do anything, Danny. Nothing you don’t want.”

“I want… Oh God, I want! But I can’t…”

Rich understood. He’d known almost all his life he was gay, but even he’d had trouble admitting it to himself in the beginning. Dan had probably never had a homosexual thought in his life until two days ago. And it was Rich’s fault.

“It’s okay. Let’s get back to house. It’s freezing out here.”

Dan nodded into his neck but didn’t move. Rich wasn’t really in any hurry. He might never have a chance to hold him this way again. His hands rubbed circles on the broad back as he enjoyed the closeness in spite of the chill air whipping around them. Dan’s trembling ebbed as they stood, not speaking.

The cold face on his neck warmed. The tight, drawn lips loosened against his skin. Rich bit his lip to suppress a gasp as a gentle caress feathered against his neck. Half-formed kisses traced a line up to his ear.

“I do…want…”

As close as the whisper was to his ear, the words were almost inaudible. He held his breath as Dan’s mouth inched toward his, brushing across his jaw at a tormenting crawl.

Sheer will kept him from turning his face to meet Dan’s lips, but nothing could stop Rich’s whimper as the corner of their mouths met. Moans mingled as Dan’s lips covered his. Hesitant, closed-mouth, but it filled Rich with incredible hope.

Lips parted with a soft whimper as Rich’s hand caressed the back of Dan’s head. Rich wanted to take advantage of the opening, taste his tongue, explore his mouth, but he held back. His heart pulsed in his throat as Dan pulled away. Forehead to forehead, noses touching, he could feel his friend’s rapid warm breath on his lips.

“It’s okay, Danny. We need to talk. Let’s go inside.”

Dan nodded against his forehead. “Talk. Yes…” His breath was short, his voice tight.

Tires crunching the dirt and gravel of the driveway caused them to pull apart. Sharon’s car rounded the copse of trees at the bend in the drive. Dan slipped his good arm into the sleeve of his coat before her car stopped next to them.

“Well, what did the doctor say?” Her voice was smug and filled with certainty.

Rich wanted to slap the tone out of her voice.

“I’m not gonna say I told you so, Daniel. You can tell me.”

Dan’s jaw clenched. He growled through gritted teeth. “The doctor said my hand would be fine in a few weeks. So you can’t say I told you so.”

The look of shock on her face was laughable. She had been so sure she was right. It didn’t last long though.

“Well, you still need help and I’m more than happy to do it. I have a bag with me and I can move right in.”

Dan shook his head. “Sharon, how many times do I have to tell you, it’s over between us? You aren’t moving in here, we aren’t getting married and your help is neither needed nor wanted.”

Sharon glared past Dan to Rich. “It’s his fault, isn’t it? He never thought I was right for you.”

Dan laughed. “Sharon, Rich has nothing to do with us. After all the fighting and mind games, you think I need his opinion to know we weren’t going to work? Now please go away!” Dan turned, tugging at Rich’s coat sleeve, and began to walk up the drive.

“There are some things Rich can’t help you with. You know I can!” Sharon let her car move forward to match the pace of the two men. “Unless, of course, those rumors are true and then maybe Rich can help you out there too!” Her vicious tone left no doubt of what she was implying.

Daniel paled as he stopped walking.

“What are you talking about?” Fear tinted Dan’s voice.

“Well, every girl I know that’s been out with him has said he was the perfect gentleman, maybe too perfect. Dana Jean said she tried every trick in the book to get him into bed and he refused.”

“Maybe I don’t like overanxious sluts, Sharon. Guess that could be why I don’t like you.” Rich was more than capable of defending himself against the bitch. He wasn’t worried about himself, but Dan was another story. His friend was having enough trouble with what was happening without her spreading rumors.

Her brown eyes grew hard with anger. “You’ll pay for that comment, Richard Taylor. I wonder how Sheriff Wheeler will take to finding out one of his deputies is a queer.”

“You do that, Sharon. You go tell Ben. See where it gets you.” He wasn’t concerned about Ben Wheeler. He’d been honest with his boss from the beginning. He was worried about Dan. “Now take your bony ass and stupid accusations and get out of here or I’ll call Ben and tell him you’re trespassing. We’ll see how you like being locked up.”

The woman’s eyes flashed daggers. “Fine. We’ll see about that. I hope you two are real happy together. I’ll make sure the whole county knows how Daniel likes taking it up the ass.”

Rich started for the car when she gunned the engine and did a fast U-turn through the grass. Gravel scattered over the two men as the car shot back onto the dirt road. When Rich turned to Dan, his friend was so pale he looked translucent.

“Let’s get in the house.” Rich’s voice growled with anger.

Rich followed as Dan stumbled toward the house. Stepping into a dip in the uneven driveway, Dan almost fell. Rich caught him, but Dan pulled away as if Rich’s touch burned.

Anger warred with sadness. Sharon managed to ruin everything with a few well-placed insults. All the hope of the tentative kiss vanished on the icy wind, leaving a bittersweet taste behind.

Their footsteps clattered across the small wooden porch. Once inside the house, Dan headed for his bedroom, closing the door behind him.

Rich didn’t bother to follow. It wouldn’t do any good. Instead he headed for the kitchen. A drink sounded like a better idea and he knew where Dan kept the good stuff.

After pulling a bottle of Maker’s Mark from a lower cabinet, he grabbed a glass off the dish drainer. The first shot of the smoky-flavored whisky burned all the way down. The second shot was smoother. By the third he didn’t feel a thing. Taking the bottle and glass, he stormed into the guestroom, slamming the door behind him.

Chapter Five

Rich stood in a small patch of sunlight on the porch. If he stood just right, the house sheltered him from the cold wind. The last two days had been a living hell. Dan withdrew into himself, rarely speaking.

Sharon’s words kept bouncing around in Rich’s head. Maybe if they had been able to talk before her visit. Maybe if… What use was it? Worrying over something that had no solution—no happy solution—was a waste of energy.

Staying here with Dan twenty-four/seven was a waste of time and effort, and too painful. Dan could manage without him. He snagged his phone from his belt and dialed Ben’s number.

“Wheeler.” The gruff voice on the other end was reassuring.

“Ben, it’s Rich.”

“Hey, how’s it going? How’s Dan?”

“He’s coming along fine. He really doesn’t need me here all the time. I might as well get back to work. Can you put me back on tomorrow night?”

“Sure thing. Are you still wanting off next Friday? You had the day scheduled before the accident.”

Rich thought about it for a split second. “Yeah, I’d like that, if it isn’t too much trouble. Was planning on going to Memphis. I might as well go on.”

“I’m sure it hasn’t been easy taking care of Dan. Will do you good to get away for a few days.”

“Sharon Rodgers came to see you, didn’t she?”

“Yeah, and she got an earful of ‘mind your own business’.” Ben chuckled. “Not exactly the response she expected.”

“I appreciate that. Her big mouth could still do some damage.” As if it hadn’t already caused enough.

“Don’t worry. If I have to, I’ll talk to her daddy. He’s about fed up with his little princess. Slandering my deputies won’t go over well, especially considering he wants me to buy the new department cars from him. She’ll behave.”

“Thanks.” Leave it to Ben to fix things. At least some things.

* * * * *

Dan wandered through the house looking for Rich. Of course if he found him, he wouldn’t admit he was looking for him. For the last couple of days the tension in the house was so thick he could taste it. The talk they planned to have two days ago hadn’t happened. They rarely spoke except when necessary. Rich had tried the day after Sharon’s visit, but Dan feigned sleep. What could he say that would make a difference?

Inhaling deep, Dan closed his eyes. He wanted Rich more than he thought possible. If Sharon hadn’t shown up that day, if she hadn’t said the things she did, things might be different. At least for a little while. But her words made him realize how impossible it would be. It couldn’t last.

He couldn’t handle the pressure of hiding a relationship and he damn sure couldn’t be open about it. Hell, even Rich wasn’t. He hadn’t been honest with Dan. Rich snuck off to see someone in Memphis, one hundred and fifty miles away.

The house wasn’t very big and he’d been through it twice. He couldn’t see the carport from the windows, but Rich wouldn’t have left without saying anything.

Would he? Maybe he would.

Dan hadn’t acted as if he cared one way or another. Yanking the front door open, he stuck his head out into the bitter air. Rich’s truck was still in the carport. A snap directed his gaze the opposite direction. Rich’s curious gaze met his as he put away his cell phone.

“I…I thought you left.”

“Would it make a difference if I did?”

Dan heard the underlying sadness in the words. Words of apology teased his lips, but instead of saying them, he let anger take over. “Guess not. You don’t have to hide to make phone calls. I’m not going to eavesdrop!”

“I didn’t think you were.” The pain in Rich’s tone tore at Dan. “I decided to call Ben after I was out here.”

“Ben? Why?”

“I asked him to put me back on shift.”

“But I need your help.”

Rich shook his head. “Not fulltime. I can stop by before and after shift and help you with anything that comes up.”

When Rich walked toward him, Dan moved back against the open door. More than the cold caused the shiver through his body as Rich brushed past him into the house. He pushed the door closed then watched Rich retreat to the guestroom.

Dan wanted his friend back, but how could that happen when every time he looked at the man he ached for so much more.

* * * * *

Rich stared blindly at the dark road. Parked in the same spot he and Dan had been sitting barely two weeks ago, his mind kept drifting back to the night of Dan’s accident. That’s when everything had changed.

The fear of losing his friend brought out emotions simmering below the surface. He finally admitted to himself he was in love with his best friend. Jeremy was right. He had been for years. Rich had buried deep the idea of the impossible relationship. For a brief moment it was almost a reality and now there was no way to bury it again.

Going back to work hadn’t helped distract Rich. The long nights of little activity in the normally quiet community gave him too much time with his thoughts. His days hadn’t been much better. Rich gripped the steering wheel in angry frustration. Five nights to think, five days to toss and turn in his bed wanting Dan’s body next to him…

Maybe it was time for a change. Rich needed someone to talk to and that someone would be Jeremy.

He hadn’t told Dan he was going to Memphis tomorrow. He didn’t know why. He would have to tell him when he stopped by in the morning. Disappearing for three days without a word wouldn’t be the best idea.

His duffel was packed and waiting at home. The plan was to catch a few hours sleep and head out a little after noon, putting him in Memphis around the time Jeremy got off shift.

First, he would have to tell Dan he was going.

Why was he hesitating? Dan didn’t want him around. When Rich went by to check on him each day, he barely spoke. He didn’t seem to need what little Rich did when he was there.

A car topped the hill and put a stop to his musing. The radar showed it was moving at more than twenty miles above the limit. Flipping his lights on, he pulled out after the speeding car. For a minute he thought the driver wasn’t going to stop, but finally the car slowed and moved to the shoulder.

“Fuck!” Recognizing the car, he gave serious thought to passing it and forgetting the ticket. Instead, he pulled in behind the vehicle and radioed the plates. Dispatch confirmed what he already knew. The last person he wanted to deal with was Sharon Rodgers.

Determined to handle this with the utmost professionalism, he climbed out of the car to issue the ticket.

The window was already down when he stopped next to the driver’s door.

“License and registration please.” His flashlight glared into the backseat and passenger side. She was alone, but the unmistakable smell of alcohol floated on the heated air escaping from the car.

“Oh, it’s you.” Her icy scorn could cause frostbite. “I didn’t know you were back from trying to warm Daniel’s bed.”

Rich ignored her comment as he examined the documents. “Have you been drinking?”

“Of course not!” Her breath told him a different story.

“I need you to step out of the car.” Rich didn’t want to do this. Sharon could cause all kinds of trouble for him and Dan, but it was his duty.

“I will not. It’s cold out there.”

“Please step out of the car.”

“No. And you can’t make me.”

Instead of arguing with her, Rich clicked the mike on his radio. “10-38 for a 10-49.”

“What did you just tell them?” Her voice almost squeaked with indignation.

“That I had a drunk driver and I need backup to transport.”

“I am not drunk, Richard Taylor!”

Rich stepped back from the car door. “Then get out of the car and prove it.”

The door swung open, nearly hitting him. She was worse than he thought.

She almost fell out of the car. A field sobriety test wasn’t necessary as she stumbled, forcing Rich to catch her.

“Get your hands off me! I know what you’re up to!”

“I’m up to keeping you from kissing the pavement. You’re under arrest for driving while intoxicated.” He half carried her to his car.

“You’ll be sorry for this. My daddy will have your badge for harassment! The whole county will know about you and your dirty little secrets!”

Her screams echoed on the lonely road. Rich drew on a mysterious well of self-control to keep from slapping her silly. Instead, he wrangled her into the car without damage to either of them.

“Cancel 10-38. 10-16.” Rich snorted ironic amusement. Transporting subject seemed so mild compared to the screaming banshee in the back of his unit.

* * * * *

Ben Wheeler looked all of his sixty-some-odd years as he entered the sheriff’s office. Rich regretted the need to call him out, but Sharon was one real piece of work.

“I’m so sorry, Ben. She’s refusing the breathalyzer and swearing her father is going to sue us all. I thought maybe you could talk some sense into her.”

The screaming continued from the lockup. Sharon hadn’t stopped since he put her in the car. Surely she’d tire at some point.

“It’s all right, son. She’s going be in for a big surprise when she finds out her daddy ain’t coming. He’s about fed up with her and her antics. You sure she’s been drinking?”

“Yeah, smelled the alcohol after I clocked her doing seventy-eight on 641. She wouldn’t get out of the car until I called for assistance. When she did, she could barely stand up. I was surprised she hadn’t been all over the road when I pulled her over. I don’t see how she could drive in her condition, much less drive straight.”

“I’ll go talk to her.”

“Thanks.”

Rich stood out of sight of the door as Ben entered the holding area. Mary Ann, the dispatcher, smiled her sympathy at Rich. There was no love lost between Mary Ann and Sharon. They had gone to high school together and Sharon treated her like shit then and still did.

“Don’t worry, Rich. Uncle Ben will take care of her.”

“Yeah…”

“Sharon Rodgers, you’ve messed up, child.” Ben’s voice was reasonable and quiet compared to the angry woman.

“Don’t call me child! I want out of here and now. You just wait ‘til my daddy gets here. You and that fag deputy of yours are going to be in so much trouble.”

Rich cringed at her choice of words.

Mary Ann just rolled her eyes in exasperation.

“Young lady,” Ben’s voice continued calm and collected. “Your daddy has decided that a night in jail is just the ticket for you. He’s not coming. And if you don’t take a breathalyzer, you will automatically lose your license for a year. Not my rule, it’s the law.”

“You old son of a bitch! I want my daddy here and I want him now. I’m gonna sue you and the queer for harassment and unlawful imprisonment.”

This time Ben’s voice didn’t disguise his scorn. “Name-callin’ isn’t helping your case. If you’d like to call your father and let him tell you to sit in jail, then that’s fine by me. I don’t feel like standing here listening to you.”

Ben appeared in the doorway with a rueful grimace. “That’s one pissed-off young lady. But I can still smell the alcohol on her. You did right, son.”

“Thanks, Ben.”

“You go back on patrol. I’ll take care of things here.”

Rich just nodded.

“You headed out to Memphis in the morning?”

“Yeah, could you check on Dan for me while I’m gone? Just a phone call maybe. He’s doing fine by himself but…”

“No problem.” Ben slapped a hand on Rich’s shoulder. “Mary Ann or I will check on him. You enjoy yourself and try to relax. The last couple of weeks have been rough on you.”

“Thanks. For everything.”

* * * * *

Dan heard Rich check out of service at home on the police scanner. A few minutes later the sound of a vehicle on the drive announced Rich’s morning visit. Dan had sat up most of the night listening for his voice on the scanner. He recognized the license plate Rich called in. Dealing with the drunken bitch couldn’t have been easy for Rich, especially since he’d called for assistance.

As much as he wanted the full story, he didn’t want Rich to know he spent his nights listening for him.

“Come in,” he responded to the knock at the door.

The door opened to reveal a haggard-looking Rich. The exhaustion showed in his friend’s slouching posture and bloodshot eyes.

“You look beat. Bad night?”

“Yeah.” Rich sighed.

“There’s coffee.”

Rich smiled and nodded. He headed for the coffeepot. The broad shoulders looked as if they bore the weight of the world on them.

Dan knew he was part of that weight. His fingers itched to soothe the muscles and rub the worry away but he couldn’t. Their friendship was going south and he didn’t know how to fix it.

A steaming cup in his hand, Rich slid into the recliner. “Popped Sharon for drunk driving last night. It wasn’t pretty. Had to call in Ben to try and calm her down.”

“What did she test at?”

“Wouldn’t take it. Her daddy left his precious princess in jail all night. Saw him pulling in as I was leaving this morning.” Rich rubbed his hand over his eyes. “She finally passed out, thankfully. Mary Ann said she was screaming insults about everyone she could think of for hours. Especially me.”

Dan knew what some of those insults would have been. Mary Ann and Ben would have heard them. Would Sharon have said anything about him?

Concern for Rich pushed the thought away. Everyone knew Dan was straight, but Rich’s lack of dating, his closed-mouth attitude on his love life, people might believe it. Of course, since it was true, Rich was gay, it made it worse. What would they think of him for being Rich’s best friend?

Dan flushed with shame at his thoughts.

Rich was a good friend, always had been. He’d been there for him when his parents died. Taking care of him after the accident was Rich’s idea. Dan didn’t have to ask, Rich was just there.

The desire to wrap his arms around his friend and comfort him was strong, but Dan knew he couldn’t. Temptation to go further, to let comfort turn to caresses, to let concern turn to kisses…

Rich stood up suddenly. “I have to go.” He returned the half-full cup to the kitchen. “I’m, uh, going out of town for a few days.”

Dan stared at Rich’s back as he rinsed the cup in the sink.

“I need to get away for a little while. Ben and Mary Ann volunteered to check on you while I’m gone. You can call them if you need anything.”

“Out of town? Memphis.” Dan winced at the anger in his own voice.

“Yeah,” Rich said as he turned. Their gazes met.

“To Memphis.”

Rich just nodded.

“To see your…him.” Dan still couldn’t use the word lover.

“Yes. I had plans to go and I decided I needed to keep them. I’ll be back on Sunday.”

“Fine.” Dan almost added “have fun” but bile choked back the words. He knew what kind of fun Rich would have. He couldn’t stand the thought of Rich touching someone else. Or someone touching Rich.

Why should I care?

The flush on Dan’s face told Rich all he needed to know. Dan couldn’t handle the idea of someone thinking he was gay. Rich hadn’t really hoped for a change of heart from him, not consciously anyway. Still the look of fear and anger on Dan’s face put a knife through Rich one more time.

Pulling his truck up to his house, he sat there for a minute. Sleep wasn’t possible right now. He might as well grab his things and head to Memphis. He had a key to Jeremy’s apartment so it didn’t matter if he wasn’t home when Rich got there. Nodding to himself, he climbed out of the vehicle then headed into the house.

* * * * *

A calloused masculine hand ran slowly up Rich’s arm as a stubble-roughened cheek nuzzled his neck. His head arched back, allowing warm lips and a moist tongue access to his sensitive skin. His cock twitched as a hand smoothed the shirt across his chest and wandered south across his stomach.

“Dan…”

The hand hesitated. “Afraid not,” a gruff voice murmured in his ear. “Sorry, babe.”

Rich’s gaze met Jeremy’s dark brown eyes. “Shit, I’m sorry…” His mind struggled out of his dream into reality.

He had been dead on his feet when he arrived at Jeremy’s apartment. The couch was as far as his tired body could go before he passed out from exhaustion.

“It’s okay, Rich.” The twinkle in Jeremy’s eyes helped reassure Rich of the truth of his words. “From what little you told me on the phone, I imagine he’s on your mind a lot these days.”

Rich sighed as he sat up.

Jeremy slid down beside him, his arms wrapping around Rich. Even though Jeremy was a couple of inches shorter, his body was broader, more muscular. His strong arms around Rich made him feel smaller and somehow protected. The ease with which Jeremy held him was comforting. So different from Dan’s reluctant touches.

“It’s impossible though. He doesn’t want me.” In spite of the grunt of laughter accompanying his words, emotion stung his eyes. “It hurts but I’ll live.”

Jeremy’s lips feathered along his temple. “Of course you will. I’m sorry it’s not working out.”

The feeling of a hard, willing body next to Rich caused his cock to react with interest. “I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

His face turned so his lips could meet the gentle ones nuzzling the side of his face.

“What do you want?” Jeremy whispered, his lips ghosting over Rich’s.

“Fuck me… I want to feel you inside me.”

The gentle lips disappeared with a groan, replaced by hard, hungry kisses. Rough hands pulled at Rich’s shirt until his chest was bare.

“Yes…” Jeremy moaned as he pushed Rich back down onto the couch. Usually there was a playful struggle to see who fucked whom, but today Rich wanted to be taken, needed to feel wanted, to be touched by someone not disgusted at the idea.

He knew for him to offer, to ask, was an extreme turn-on for Jeremy. A hot mouth grazed through the hair on Rich’s chest, settling on an interested nipple. One hand roughly massaged the growing desire in Rich’s jeans.

“I want you naked…” Jeremy groaned as he rose on his knees. “Now.”

The low growl had Rich hard in seconds. Jeremy didn’t go all alpha on him often, but when he did… Rich stripped his clothes with growing anticipation.

Jeremy was even faster and a hard, naked body manhandled him down onto the couch.

A hungry mouth covered his as their cocks rubbed together. Jeremy’s hands held Rich’s head as his tongue explored his mouth, teasing his palate and counting his teeth. Rich could only moan at the ferocity of his lover’s oral attack. Tongues twisted around each other as their bodies ground together.

“I’m gonna fuck you so hard,” Jeremy growled as they came up for air.

“Yes…”

Jeremy swallowed Rich’s moan as he mounted another assault on Rich’s mouth. Their legs tangled, pulling their bodies even closer, before Jeremy twisted them around. Now on their sides with his back against the couch and Rich pulled tight against him, Jeremy’s fingers dug into Rich’s ass cheek.

Rich couldn’t do anything but groan as the inquisitive fingers moved down the crack. A single finger pushed roughly at his opening.

“Yes…” Rich gasped. “Yes…” His empathic words turned to a low whimper as the fingers moved away. “No…”

“Bedroom. Now.”

Rich’s body shivered at the rough desire in Jeremy’s voice. Need for his body, need for him. They stumbled the short distance with their mouths locked together. Rich found himself pinned against the wall near the bed, Jeremy’s body pressed hard against him.

“Gonna fuck you…” The words mumbled against his neck made Rich’s breath catch in his throat. “What if I turn you around and fuck you against the wall?” The muscular body pushed Rich harder into the wall to emphasize his words. Their cocks banged against each other. “Would you like that?”

“Oh God, yes…”

Jeremy had a slight dominant streak in him, and there were times Rich loved to submit to him. Now was one of those times. The need to be wanted was overwhelming.

Knuckles tapped against the wall as Jeremy’s hands slid around to grab his ass. Fingers kneaded his cheeks together, massaging his asshole. Rich’s body shuddered with desperate desire. So different from…

He refused to think of Dan. Not now, not like this, it wasn’t fair to Jeremy.

Stubble scraped his neck as moist heat sucked at his skin. A hard cock poked at his stomach, rubbing against his own.

“Fuck me…”

A frantic push against him and a loud moan rewarded his words. Vibrations resonated through the frantic mouth sucking along his collarbone. The amazing heat of Jeremy’s body deserted him.

His lover reached for the nightstand. When he returned, Jeremy’s rough hands turned him to face the wall, placing Rich’s hands high on the wall, palms down. The snap of the lube cap made Rich moan.

Wet, coarse fingers pushed at his ass, one sliding inside without warning. It had been a long time but he welcomed the burn, pushing against the intrusion.

“More…” The hoarse whisper gained him a second finger. “More…” A third rewarded his whimper. The need to be filled overpowered the intense burning sensation. “More… Fuck me…” The words dissolved into a howl of loss as the fingers left him.

The blunt tip of a hot cock pushed at his opening. Teeth dug into his lips to keep the cry of pain from escaping as Rich pressed back, impaling himself on his lover’s cock.

Jeremy’s arms wrapped around Rich’s waist as heat filled him. Balls bounced against his own as Jeremy thrust deep into him. A calloused hand slid down his stomach and captured his aching cock. Soon Jeremy’s cock and hand worked in sync. A long stroke into his ass accompanied a tight fist around his weeping flesh.

Rich’s hands scrabbled for a hold on the wall. His fingers tried to puncture drywall as he matched Jeremy’s rhythm.

“Harder… Harder…” His half-formed words drove his lover deeper. “Yes… Yes…”

“Shit, babe…not gonna last…” Jeremy’s breathless words sent Rich over the edge.

“Yes… Come for me… Oh shit…” Rich’s head dropped back against Jeremy’s shoulder as his cock exploded, white sticky streams of seed marking the wall.

Jeremy’s hand tightened on him and stilled as Rich heard the panted groans of his lover’s orgasm. Strong arms crushed his chest in a tight embrace.

Tender kisses feathered his shoulder in stark contrast to the roughness of the sex. Jeremy’s arms relaxed, slid around Rich’s waist as he leaned heavy against him.

Rich let his hands slide down the wall. His forehead pressed against the cool surface as his hands covered Jeremy’s.

“That was incredible.” Jeremy’s breath puffed against Rich’s ear as he spoke.

“Yeah…” Rich’s brain wasn’t working well enough to say anything more. Between the long night, the drive here and mind-blowing sex, it was all he could do to remain vertical.

Jeremy’s spent cock slid out of Rich. Pulling Rich away from the wall, Jeremy guided him to the bed. The last thing he remembered were the covers pulled over his naked body.

* * * * *

A heavy arm draped over his waist and a warm body snuggled against his back. The musky smell of sweat and sex still lingered in the room. The windows held a tinge of redness as the sun started to rise. Rich’s mind tried to calculate the number of hours he must have slept. It couldn’t have been later than six or seven when Jeremy arrived home last night. As good as the sex was, it couldn’t have lasted more than an hour, tops. The clock glared six forty-three. Ten or eleven hours? He hadn’t realized how tired he was.

More than his body was tired. His heart ached. Until he finally admitted his feelings for Dan, he hadn’t realized how lonely his life was. Maybe it was time for a change. His whole relationship with Dan was an irreparable mess.

After arresting her, Sharon would be out for his blood. The only thing left was his job. Sharon, vindictive bitch that she was, might find a way to screw with it too. Maybe he needed a change of everything—home, job, life.

His fingers played with the hair on Jeremy’s arm while his mind drifted around. So many times Jeremy had offered to let him live here, help him get a job with the Memphis PD. Maybe it was time to take him up on it. What did he have left back home? A new life sounded good, but his eyes itched at the thought of leaving Dan.

A scratchy kiss to his shoulder let him know Jeremy was awake.

“Good morning,” Rich whispered.

“Yeah, it is… It’s always good when you’re here.”

Rich let himself believe the wistfulness of Jeremy’s words was his imagination. “It’s good to be here. Sorry I passed out on you.”

A gentle snort of amusement sent a soft breath across his shoulder. “I’d like to think it was because of my wonderful ability as a lover, but I figure you left right after shift and didn’t get any sleep yesterday.”

“I think it was both,” Rich chuckled, “and I did get a little sleep before you got home.”

“Well, now that you’re awake, Sleeping Beauty, you want breakfast?”

“Yeah…” Rich sighed, but neither of them bothered to move. After a few minutes’ silence, “Is someone bringing it?”

Chapter Six

Breakfast was a joint effort as was the cleaning that followed. Curled up on the couch with coffee nearby and the newspaper split between them, Rich couldn’t keep his mind from its earlier topic.

Thumbing through the sections on the coffee table, he found the apartment listings. He didn’t pay attention to the rustle of Jeremy’s paper until a finger hooked over the top of his. Looking up, he saw the question in his friend’s eyes before he asked it.

“Thinking of moving?”

“Maybe.” The answer wasn’t enough. Rich sighed as he folded the paper and tossed it back on the coffee table. “I think I need a change.”

“Because of Dan?”

“He’s part of it.” Rich ran through the events of the past few weeks in as few words as possible. He finished by telling him about arresting Sharon the night before last. “The whole county will know soon. About me being gay, that is. Nothing’s going to stop Sharon from running her mouth. She may not know for sure, but she can still do a lot of damage.”

“Is it so bad, coming out? I mean, you’ve been gay all your life. Aren’t you tired of hiding from everyone?”

“Maybe. I don’t want to have to be so careful all the time. But I don’t think Dan could handle staying my friend if everyone knew I was gay. You should have seen his face when I told him about Sharon shouting it all over the jail. He was horrified. If I lose his friendship, I don’t really have anything keeping me there but the job. The few other friends I have might understand, but I think more of them will feel like Dan.”

“You don’t have to look for an apartment. At least not right away. There’s more than enough room for you here.”

“I know, but I don’t want to interfere with your life. I know I’m not the only person you see. It would cause too many problems.”

“Actually you are.” Jeremy shrugged as he settled back against the corner of the couch.

“What?”

“The only person I’m seeing.”

“But I thought—”

Jeremy cut him off. “At first, no. But for the last two years, yeah.”

“But…but…”

“I know. I let you believe I was having a wild time in between your visits, but I wasn’t. When I went out, it was with friends. I didn’t think you were ready to hear the truth. Still don’t think you are.”

“The truth?” Rich’s world was spinning out of control. Nothing was nailed down or solid anymore. He was afraid of what Jeremy was saying and what it meant for the one relationship he thought he could count on.

Jeremy moved closer, slipping his arm around Rich. “That I love you, that I’m in love with you, that I want you to move here, move in with me.” Lips brushed against Rich’s, a tongue took advantage of a mouth open with astonishment. So gentle compared to last night’s bruising caresses. “Think about it.”

The hope in Jeremy’s whisper tore at Rich’s heart. He cared for Jeremy, loved him in a way, but not the way he wanted. A gentle push and Jeremy released his mouth.

“Jer, I never knew. I’m sorry.” Rich felt as if he’d been using Jeremy all these years.

“Babe, you have nothing to be sorry for.” Jeremy’s lips brushed the tip of his nose. “I knew how you felt about Dan, even before you did. I know how you feel about me. Nothing’s changed. If you want to move, the spare room’s yours. No strings. I can’t help the way I feel. But it doesn’t change a thing.”

“Except now I know.”

“Yes, you do, but it still doesn’t change things.” Jeremy stopped him from arguing with a tender kiss. “No more talking now,” he whispered.

Rich nodded as teeth caught his bottom lip with a gentle tug. A moist tongue teased back and forth on his lip. His arm slipped around Jeremy’s waist, pulling him tight against him. A sigh of relief brushed across his face. Jeremy distracted him for now, but they would talk about this again. Rich had some decisions to make.

* * * * *

Dan watched as the ceiling of his bedroom gradually came into focus with the sunrise. He hadn’t slept much. Each time he dozed off, he dreamed of Rich, of the things Rich would be doing with someone else. A lump in his throat threatened to turn into a howl of frustration.

The anger from yesterday had melted into sadness. Finally he admitted he wanted Rich more than he wanted any woman he’d ever dated, but it was an impossible idea. He wasn’t gay. Even if he was, there was too much to lose. Not just for himself, but that was part of it. How could he openly admit to loving another man? Loving another man? The words echoed in his mind.

He loved Rich. Oh God… He loved him. How could he look for Miss Right for years only to discover he really wanted Mr. Right?

Sadness for something lost so soon after being found tightened his throat. He’d wanted someone to build a life with, to settle down with, but it couldn’t be Rich no matter how much he loved him.

With small-minded small-town attitudes, it could cause trouble in too many ways. Rich had his Memphis friend. No one had to know about either of them. Rich could never know how he felt.

* * * * *

“Can you stay an extra day?”

Half asleep with his lover’s back spooned against him, Rich half heard the question. “What?” The sun had been up for hours but he wasn’t in a rush to face Sunday.

“Can you stay until tomorrow? If you’re serious about moving, there are a couple of positions open in the precinct. You could come in and talk to the captain.”

Rich didn’t answer right away. Moving was a big decision and he wasn’t sure he was ready to make it. Then again, it couldn’t hurt to assess the situation.

His world back home was falling apart at the seams. Here he had Jeremy, the possibility of a new job and a new life, one without as much secrecy. Though Jeremy didn’t broadcast his sexuality at work, he didn’t have to hide it as Rich did.

“Think about it?” Again wistfulness colored Jeremy’s voice.

This time Rich knew it wasn’t his imagination. “I am. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to feel out my options.”

Jeremy’s hand squeezed his then pulled it south to rest on his swollen cock. “You could feel this while you’re thinking about it.”

Rich grinned into Jeremy’s neck. “Sounds like a plan.”

Jeremy’s hand stayed on his as Rich stroked his lover. The idea of waking up next to him every day, sharing the mundane things of life as well as the mind-blowing sex, didn’t sound so bad. If he couldn’t have Dan, a life with Jeremy sounded good. But would he be using Jeremy, accepting second best? He needed to think about it, but right now his blood supply had other things to occupy it.

Rich moved from behind Jeremy and pushed him over on his back. Sliding around under the covers, he covered Jeremy with his body. Sucking softly on Jeremy’s bottom lip caused a soft moan from his lover.

Bodies rubbed slowly against each other as Rich’s mouth released Jeremy’s lip. Rich wandered over Jeremy’s face, spreading soft kisses on his eyelids, his nose and back to his mouth.

A moist tongue swiped through Rich’s parted lips. Rich chased the teasing flesh back into its lair. His hands slid under Jeremy’s shoulders, curling up around the hard muscles.

The scrape of day-old stubble rubbed as Rich sought deeper contact with his lover’s mouth. Their legs twisted together and locked as their bodies desired closer contact. Hot cocks rubbed against each other, pressed tight between their stomachs. Strong arms wrapped around Rich as moans invaded their kiss.

“Oh yes…” Jeremy’s breath caught as his body stiffened.

Rich could feel the shudder and jerking pushes as hot liquid smeared between their bodies. He held him tight while his lover’s cock emptied. Rich wasn’t as close but it wouldn’t take much more. Sliding in the slick seed, he could feel himself approach the edge.

“Fuck me, Rich…”

The words made his balls tighten. Rich willed himself not to come as he buried his face in Jeremy’s neck. His teeth sank into the hard muscle as he tried to gain control over his body. Finally able to breathe again, he nodded against Jeremy’s neck.

Moving off his lover to reach the nightstand, he grabbed the lube and a condom. After squirting lube on his fingers, he knelt between Jeremy’s legs.

With a slow, gentle push, his finger entered the tight velvet passage. His thumb massaged the perineum as his finger circled, loosening the opening. Jeremy’s sigh made him grin.

His lover’s eyes closed. His mouth went slack.

Rich leaned forward then planted a brief kiss on his parted lips. When he pressed a second finger in beside the first, Jeremy’s hands caught his neck. Rich’s fingers stroked his lover’s ass as his tongue stroked Jeremy’s mouth.

Jeremy’s body pushed against the intruding fingers. A slight bump against his prostate left Jeremy gasping into Rich’s mouth. A third finger caused a moan and Jeremy’s lips went slack again.

Rich feathered gentle kisses across the stubble-covered jaw before he pulled away, his fingers leaving the tight heat.

Grabbing a couple of pillows, he stuffed them under Jeremy’s ass. His lover’s eyes watched with lazy anticipation as Rich rolled the condom over his leaking cock. Teasing Jeremy, he slowly stroked his latex-covered flesh with lube while one finger taunted Jeremy’s puckered opening.

“Oh shit, Rich! Fuck me already!”

Rich grinned as he replaced the finger with the head of his cock. Jeremy’s hips pushed toward him and he pulled back slightly.

“Patience…” Rich laughed at the frustrated grimace on his lover’s face.

“Fuck patience!”

“I thought you wanted me to fuck you?”

“Asshole!” The word dissolved into a groan as the head of Rich’s cock pushed into Jeremy’s tight ass.

With slow, short strokes, he worked his way into his lover. An eternity passed before he was balls-deep in him.

“So hot…” Rich murmured as Jeremy’s legs wrapped around his waist. “So good…”

“Oh yeah, you too…”

Rich leaned over, his hungry mouth feeding on Jeremy’s. Kisses merged into mutual moans as Rich moved in his lover with short, lazy strokes. Jeremy’s hands held his face while his mouth devoured Rich’s. He could feel Jeremy’s cock reawakening between their bodies.

“Oh yes… Harder…” With passionate gasps and half-formed words, his body arched into Rich’s.

He pushed away from Jeremy’s lips to get better leverage. Pulling one of Jeremy’s legs up against his chest, he plowed Jeremy’s tight ass hard and deep.

Jeremy’s hand moved to his reawakened length, matching Rich’s cadence. “Oh shit, yes… Hard… So deep…”

If Jeremy didn’t shut up, it would be over soon. Rich’s mind laughed at him. Who was he kidding? It would be over soon anyway. Jeremy’s ass clenched around his cock with every thrust, practically pulling the come out of him.

With a strangled cry, Jeremy’s cock emptied again, small spurts of almost-clear liquid. Velvet-lined steel clutched Rich’s cock as Jeremy’s ass contracted around him.

“Oh fuck!” Rich let loose the hold on his desire. Pumping against Jeremy, he emptied himself with short thrusts and wild grunts.

Falling over on his spent lover, Rich’s mouth zeroed in on Jeremy’s. Long, hard kisses, tonsil-seeking and wet, accompanied the slow fall from the heights.

When the need for air finally overcame him, Rich buried his face in Jeremy’s neck. Jeremy’s soft words whispered against his ear finally reached his mind.

“I love you…”

Rich closed his eyes against the sting of emotion. He, of all people, knew the pain of loving someone who didn’t love back.

* * * * *

Ben understood his request to stay another day although Rich hadn’t told him the reason. Rich hadn’t bothered to let Dan know either. Ben or Mary Ann would tell him.

The meeting with Jeremy’s captain had gone well. Captain Davis seemed like a good man. He was very optimistic about Rich’s chances if he decided to make the move. They preferred new officers to have a law enforcement background. Not only did Rich have twelve years’ experience, he had a degree in criminology from the University of Tennessee in Knoxville. A lot of the training requirements could be waived.

Rich scanned the road in front of him as his mind drifted. The sun was already setting, but since he didn’t have a shift tonight, it didn’t matter. He hung around the precinct for a while, meeting Jeremy’s coworkers and his partner. They all treated Rich as one of them, a fellow police officer, even though several of them knew he was Jeremy’s lover. Being out was a refreshing change. Not worrying about what people might find out or even think. Maybe moving was the best idea.

Then there was Jeremy. He did love him. Not the same way he loved Dan, not with the gut-wrenching tide of emotion. Would it be so bad to live with Jeremy, share a life with him? They had been off-and-on lovers for five years. They knew each other well and were compatible in almost everything they did.

Dan grimaced as he turned off the main highway onto the dirt track to his house. Would Jeremy be able to handle it though, knowing Rich didn’t love him the same way?

Jeremy said he understood and could deal with it. But would his understanding turn to resentment as time went by? So many things to think about, so many decisions to make. Rich pulled his truck up into the carport and killed the engine. He needed more time to think.

* * * * *

From his darkened living room, Dan saw the headlights turn onto the property. His heart beat faster as he waited to see if Rich would turn toward his house or Dan’s. Batting at the irrational hope of seeing Rich, he swallowed disappointment when he saw the headlights turn away.

He didn’t want just to see Rich. He wanted to touch him, to feel him, to have him do all the things Dan imagined Rich had done to “Jer” all weekend.

He also wanted to scream at him for leaving him for a willing fuck. The entire situation was impossible. Feelings and desires he couldn’t will away haunted him day and night. All he could think about was the way Rich’s hands caressed him, the way his mouth tasted him. His body—the way Rich’s body had pressed against him that night in Jackson—the weight, the feel of his skin, his cock pressed against him.

Worse, all the things he imagined Rich had probably done with his lover. Anger and jealousy washed over him.

The phone startled him out of his thoughts.

“What?” he yelled into the receiver. He bit his lip when he heard the soft response.

“I’m back. Just wanted to know if you need anything.”

“No. Not from you.” Dan slammed the phone down in the cradle. Sliding down the counter to the floor, he buried his head in the crook of his good arm. “Not from you…”

The last four days he hadn’t been able to think about anything except what he wanted from Rich. His relationships with women never seemed to match up to his and Rich’s friendship. Even before his accident he would find himself wishing for a woman with Rich’s sense of humor and easygoing personality.

He knew his love life was the talk of the county, but he didn’t sleep around as much as everyone assumed. He wanted someone to spend his life with not just sex. His ideal of the perfect woman was always too high. Most of the women he dated didn’t make the cut after a few dates. Usually he didn’t bother to get involved sexually unless there was more to the relationship than physical attraction. Even then the sex wasn’t as gratifying as he thought it would be. At least until Sharon.

She’d opened his eyes to a whole new world in the bedroom. Before her, sex had been predictable. A little foreplay then a lot of fucking, usually in the basic positions—him on top, her on top. He was considerate of his partners, made sure they climaxed, but he never felt completely satisfied.

Then Sharon freaked him out with her oral and anal expertise. Most women he slept with thought a blowjob was limited to a couple of minutes before the real sex began. Sharon went after his cock as if it were the main course.

Rich’s mouth on him was much more intense than Sharon’s. Thoughts of Rich’s cock pushing into him instead of Sharon’s fingers had left him breathless.

The sound of tires crunching the gravel drive sent fear and excitement coursing though him. Would Rich come up here after the way Dan had treated him on the phone? As much as he wanted to see him, Dan didn’t move from his spot in the floor. The lights were out, maybe Rich would go away.

The knock on the door told him different.

“Dan, open up! If you don’t, I’ll just use my key!” Rich’s angry voice sounded through the door.

“Go away!” Dan yelled from his huddled position on the floor. “Just go away!”

A mumbled “Fuck this shit…” was followed by the sound of the key in the door.

Dan scrambled to his feet before the door opened. The light nearly blinded him as Rich hit the switch on his way in.

“Damn it, Dan! What the fuck do you want from me?”

“Nothing!” Dan moved to his bedroom but not fast enough to get the door closed. Rich’s foot stopped it in mid-slam. Dan backed into the room with Rich following him.

“Why are you doing this? You’ve been my friend for years. Can’t you accept the fact I’m gay and get over it?”

The pain in Rich’s voice ripped at his heart. He couldn’t make Rich understand.

“What do I have to do to make this right? What do you want me to do?”

The wall stopped Dan’s backward motion. Rich stopped a couple of feet from him.

“I want you to have tits and a cunt and me to still feel like this.” Dan closed his eyes, regretting the words as soon as they left his lips.

“Well, that’s not going to happen. I like being a man. Because I like sex with men doesn’t make me want to be a woman. And if you’d just admit you want sex with me—”

“No! I don’t!”

“Then why is your cock so hard it’s practically tearing a hole in your sweatpants? You do it to me too, you know.”

Dan couldn’t help but glance down at his own traitorous cock and at the swell in Rich’s jeans. His body reacted even with his mind screaming no. His body betrayed him and his hips arched forward. “I don’t want you.”

“But you do.” Tenderness replaced the anger in Rich’s voice. “As much as I want you.”

“Want me?” The gasped words weren’t meant to be aloud.

“Yes…” The tenderness in Rich’s voice moved to his eyes.

“How?”

“In every way…” The heavy breathing was contagious. “I want to touch you all over. I want to taste your skin, your cock…” Rich moved closer still. “I want to feel your mouth around my cock. I want to fuck you hard and deep until you come screaming my name.” His whispered words sent shivers through Dan. “I want to feel you balls-deep in my ass with my legs wrapped around you. Everything, in every way…” Mere inches separated their bodies, their mouths. “But most of all, I want this.” Rich’s hands cupped Dan’s face.

Rich’s mouth cut Dan’s whimper short. Soft lips suckled at his, a moist tongue slipped between Dan’s lips when he moaned. Dan’s arms wrapped around the hard body in front of him.

Rich pushed him tight against the wall, their cocks pressing into each other. He didn’t realize his mouth responded until Rich’s moans matched his. The eager tongue lapped at his then mapped his palate with teasing blows. Hunger and need swept over him as he frantically explored back. His good hand pulled at Rich’s neck, trying to get him closer.

Strong hands found Dan’s hips. Pulling him hard against him, Rich’s fingers slipped between the wall and his body. Rough fingers massaged his ass.

“Yes…” The word came out as a moan that Rich’s hungry mouth swallowed. “Oh God, yes… Want you…”

Rich’s hands moved up to the waist of Dan’s sweats. Fingers teased the flesh under the elastic.

A muffled “Yes…” sent inquisitive fingers down to his bare ass. Rich’s other hand moved around and freed Dan’s aching cock from the sweats. In a sensuous slide of material, the pants bunched at his ankles. The cool air in the room did nothing to dispel the heat running through Dan.

A calloused hand stroked his dick as the other traced the crack of his ass. Dan didn’t know which way to thrust. He wanted it everything Rich said. He wanted it all.

“Don’t stop…” The words tore from his throat as the heat of Rich’s hands left him. An audible sigh of relief replaced the anguished moan as forceful hands pulled Dan’s sweatshirt up. Gentleness replaced roughness as Rich extracted his injured hand from the sleeve.

Rich pressed against him, his hot mouth marking Dan’s neck with wet kisses. “I’m not stopping unless you tell me to. Please don’t.”

“Don’t stop… Please don’t stop…” Dan’s words were sobs, desperate with need. He arched against Rich, the coarse material of Rich’s jeans pressing against his cock.

Beard burn scorched his skin as Rich’s mouth moved to his chest. Moist heat tormented his nipples before Rich moved slowly down his body to kneel at his feet.

Kisses fluttered along Dan’s inner thighs as Rich raised first one leg and then the other, removing his shoes and pants. Naked against the cold wall, Dan felt more vulnerable than he ever had, but he had never been so aroused.

Rich’s hot mouth suckled the tip of his cock. His hand slipped between Dan’s ass and the wall. Fingers teased his asshole as Rich’s tongue dipped into his leaking slit.

“Oh shit…” seemed an appropriate response as Rich’s mouth enveloped his cock in moist, ravenous heat. Slow sucking coupled with a tongue in constant motion sent Dan close to the edge in seconds. When Rich’s finger pressed past the muscle of his anus, Dan fell over the edge—hard.

Rich sucked the ability to stand as well as the come from his aching cock. Dan’s knees grew weak and his head swam through confused, passion-laden thoughts.

Cold air on his wet cock made him shiver as he slid to the floor. Rich’s mouth covered his. The hard, bruising kisses tasted of come and Rich. Hands roamed his body, touching, teasing, never lighting for long. His body pressed against the warmth of the man holding him. A shiver swept through him but he didn’t know if was from the cold or from Rich’s touch, or both.

“Come on,” Rich whispered, his forehead pressed against Dan’s. “You’re cold.”

With shaking knees and Rich’s arm tight around him, he stumbled to the bed. Rich threw the covers back and helped him under before sitting on the edge of the bed. Dan wanted Rich to join him, to curl up beside him under the warming covers, to feel his skin next to his. He couldn’t ask. He didn’t know how.

“Please…” was the closest thing he could manage.

Rich nodded, his hand brushing Dan’s hair before he stood.

Dan watched with his heart in his mouth as Rich removed his jacket and shirt. The light from the living room highlighted him. Sparse hair spread across the broad, flat chest, tiny nipples surrounded by almost brown areolas. So different from a woman, but he wanted to touch them, taste them.

Rich toed off his shoes as he reached for his belt. Dan held his breath as the long fingers undid the button and zipper of the jeans. Rich’s cock strained against his underwear, a wet spot evidence of his arousal.

Dan forgot to breathe as Rich pulled the thin cotton off with his jeans. His dick sprang free, swollen and red. The cold forgotten as heat of a different kind coursed through him, Dan raised the covers in invitation.

Chapter Seven

Rich kept waiting to wake from his dream but he didn’t, not even when he slid under the covers next to Dan. Not when Dan’s hand reached for him. Slow, hesitant fingers combed the hair on his chest. Rich leaned his face close to Dan’s, willing him to kiss him, to make the first move to meet his lips.

When the soft, full lips brushed his, Rich thought his heart would explode through his chest. A moist tongue licked his lip with a featherlight flick.

The muscles in Dan’s neck strained as he tried to get closer, his hand tugging at Rich’s arm. Cautious of the injured hand cradled between them, Rich moved closer. Teeth pulled at Dan’s lower lip before the hesitant tongue reappeared.

Almost in slow motion, Dan’s mouth covered his. Rich wanted to grab him, pull him tight and devour his mouth, but he didn’t. Instead he waited. A soft moan preceded the firm pressure against his lips. He teased the gentle tongue, letting it chase his back into his mouth.

The tight fingers on his arm relaxed and moved back to his chest. The rough pad of a thumb rubbed Rich’s nipple. A startled gasp escaped his throat. A teasing pinch to the hard nubbin of flesh caused another.

He could feel the grin on Dan’s mouth as their kisses continued. Rich nipped at his lover’s lips. The playful pinching stopped as Dan’s fingers trailed lower, combing through the hair on Rich’s chest, his stomach, stopping to play with his navel. So close to his aching cock.

“Touch me…” The whisper was supposed to be in Rich’s mind only, so he was startled to hear the words floating in the air.

The finger circling his navel stopped and took Rich’s breath with it. With excruciating slowness, the curious hand moved lower, fingers grazed the sensitive head of his dick.

Air forced its way into his lungs as Dan’s hand wrapped around his aching flesh. Slow, awkward strokes made his balls tighten. The hesitant lips grew more forceful, demanding.

With unsteady motion, Dan rose up onto the elbow of his injured arm.

Rich rolled onto his back as Dan’s mouth moved to his neck. Hungry lips roamed his neck and shoulder, leaving warm, wet kisses in its wake. Rich wrapped his fingers around Dan’s on his cock to steady his awkward left-handed strokes.

Together their hands slid up and down his aching flesh as Dan’s mouth moved lower. Lips brushed his nipple, timid and unsure. Rich’s soft moan seemed to give the curious mouth courage and wet heat surrounded the tiny nub of flesh.

“Yes…” His hand tightened around Dan’s, bringing the slow strokes on his cock to a steel-fisted halt. He didn’t want to come yet. He didn’t want this to end. “You feel so good.” Emotion choked his words then Dan’s lips stopped his mouth.

Hard, hungry kisses drove Rich into the pillow. Dan’s hand moved away from his as he crawled over him. His friend’s weight covered him, pressing his cock tight between their bodies. He could feel Dan’s renewed interest bumping him.

“You do too.” Kisses punctuated Dan’s words. “God, you do too.” The hard-muscled body rubbed against him. “I want you. I want you.” Frantic words accompanied frenzied kisses.

Rich’s hands ran down the lean muscles on Dan’s back until he reached the crack of his ass. Shudders racked his lover’s body as Rich’s fingers slid down to tease the tight, puckered hole. Moaning against Rich’s face, Dan pressed back against them.

“Rich…” Dan’s whisper made Rich’s body shudder with desire.

The tip of Rich’s finger circled the tight muscle, teasing him. Dan’s body moved on him, their cocks sandwiched between them. Sliding faster against him as his ass pressed against Rich’s finger, Dan’s hot mouth fed on his. Dan’s weight on him, lips urgent on Rich’s, and hot seed erupted between them.

Rich wanted so much more, but Dan’s acceptance was just the beginning. He could wait for anything else.

* * * * *

Rich was only half asleep when he heard the car on the road. His arm draped over Dan’s waist. He welcomed the heat of the body spooned against him, the fingers loosely intertwined with his. They may have slept some or maybe not. Rich didn’t care until the muscles under his arm tensed with the sound of the car’s approach.

Dan moved away from him as if his body burned him.

“Hey?”

“There’s someone out there. They’ll see your truck.” Dan retrieved Rich’s clothes from the floor as he whispered his concern. He threw Rich’s clothes on the bed then grabbed another pair of sweats from a drawer.

“So, it’s not like I’ve never been here before.” Rich sat up in the bed. “It’s after eleven. Whoever it is will go away when you don’t answer. They’ll think we’re asleep.”

“Asleep together?” The sharp panic in Dan’s voice cut Rich.

“No. Why would anyone make that assumption? I’ve stayed here before, remember the last two weeks.”

“But what if they did?”

“Who cares? It’s not as if they have proof of anything. It’d be ignored as gossip.” Rich’s words had no effect on Dan’s rising panic.

Dan put his clothes on as fast as he could with the bum hand. He headed for the door. “Get dressed,” he hissed on his way out.

* * * * *

Dan’s heart skipped a beat when he looked out the window. He recognized Sharon’s car in the pale moonlight. He couldn’t deal with her right now. He knew he looked bed-rumpled and God only knew what his face looked like chapped from Rich’s five o’clock shadow and his lips swollen from kissing. Sharon would notice. He couldn’t open the door when she knocked.

“Go away, Sharon! I don’t feel like dealing with you tonight!” Yelling through the door was childish but he couldn’t open it.

“Your fag friend is in there. Why can’t I come in?”

“Because I don’t want you to… And stop calling him that!”

“We both know it’s the truth.” Her shrill voice grated on his nerves. “Fine, I’ll just tell everyone I caught you with his cock up your ass! Fucking like bunnies! How do you think all your friends will feel about that?”

“Shut the fuck up, Sharon, and go away.” Dan’s forehead rested against the door. The cold of the night air seeped through his bones. Only minutes ago he’d lain content and warm in Rich’s embrace thinking about exactly what she described. But now… “Go away, Sharon.”

Fear tensed his entire body as he listened to her retreating footsteps on the porch. She’d spoiled everything. Dan turned to lean his back against the door. He banged his head on the hard wood several times as the car drove away. Briefly he wondered why she’d shown up here so late. The thought was banished by the idea of never feeling Rich’s skin against his again.

Rich’s gaze met Dan’s sad eyes. No, he’s not doing this. On silent feet, Rich moved to his distraught lover.

Dan’s body tensed as Rich’s arms slid around him. “Don’t…” Dan whispered. “Please don’t.”

“Why not?” Rich pressed him against the door. His lips brushed Dan’s.

“I can’t do it.”

“Why does it matter what she thinks?”

“It doesn’t, as long as it’s not true. I can’t deny it if it’s true!”

His lover’s blue eyes mirrored Rich’s pain. “Please don’t do this…”

“I can’t be…what you want. You have your friend in Memphis. You don’t need me.”

A slight flare of anger shot through Rich. “What does that mean?”

“You have someone to… You know…”

“Do you think this, between you and me, is about a more convenient buddy fuck?”

Dan’s eyes answered the question without his mouth moving.

“You are so wrong.” Rich released the reluctant man, backing away as the anger built. “You haven’t figured it out yet? Why would I put up with your on-again, off-again bullshit if that’s all I wanted?”

Rich crowded him against the wall again and grabbed Dan’s head between his hands. His mouth pressed hard against the unwilling lips. It didn’t take long for Dan to give in to the insistent tongue seeking entrance.

With bruising force, Rich took advantage of Dan’s lapse of denial. Hot hunger ran through him as his unwilling lover grew more willing, wanting. With a muffled moan, Dan’s arms wrapped around Rich’s waist. His body pressed against Rich with a hunger matching his own.

Then it stopped. Anger clashed with deep sadness as Dan pushed him away with a violence that matched his previous passion.

“No! I can’t! Don’t you understand? Why are you doing this? You have a willing fuck waiting in Memphis. You left me here for four days to be with him! You don’t need me.”

“No, I do need you. Jer may be willing but I want you. Don’t you understand?” he echoed Dan’s words. “This isn’t about a willing fuck, as you put it. I love you. I’ve loved you for years. I just didn’t realize it until I thought I’d lost you when your car rolled.”

The sadness in Dan’s eyes was genuine but it didn’t make a difference. “Please leave. I can’t do this.”

Rich swallowed against the lump in his throat. He pushed past Dan to open the door. His coat, still in Dan’s bedroom, forgotten, he rushed out into the bitter night air. Deep breaths staved off the heat of anger building toward Sharon as he climbed into his truck. So close to what he wanted and now the bitch fucked everything up.

He would make the move to Memphis. Jeremy may be second choice but he wanted Rich. He couldn’t stay here, near Dan, knowing Dan wanted him but couldn’t get past his fear.

* * * * *

Dan’s heart raced as he watched the taillights of Rich’s truck retreat down the road. He was still watching when they turned toward Rich’s house. He’d done the right thing. He couldn’t be what Rich needed, no matter how much they both wanted it.

“Oh God…” His friend’s parting words finally sunk in. Rich was in love with him. Dan collapsed on the couch. Pain ripped through him from his chest to his gut.

Rich said he loved him. Breathing became difficult. He loved him and Dan loved Rich in return, but a relationship couldn’t happen.

Sharon’s words drove home his worst fears. People would find out, they’d know what he and Rich did together.

His thoughts became a mélange of his friend and of time spent with him. Not the last couple of weeks, but before the insanity since his accident. They’d spent time together on a regular basis. Even on duty they usually talked at least once during shift.

Dan found his friend’s company reassuring, comforting in a way. A warm glow of something, happiness maybe, always accompanied their time together. He compared the feelings to the women he dated. The nagging tension of seeing a woman wasn’t there when he was with Rich.

Dan rolled his eyes shut. He couldn’t get the feel of Rich’s lips on him, the heat of his skin out of his mind.

The squelch of the police scanner on the counter startled him. He forgot it was on. A part of his mind heard the dispatcher’s words while the rest dwelt on his feelings for Rich.

“10-47… 10-34…”

The codes took a few seconds to register. Send ambulance, officer in trouble. Then the address…

“Rich!”

His cell phone rang as he ran for the door. He grabbed it on his way out to his truck. A glance told him it was the dispatcher.

“Dan, Rich’s hurt.” Mary Ann’s words sent his blood pumping as he climbed in his truck.

“I heard. I’m on the way. What happened?”

“I don’t know. He called 911 on his cell phone. All he said was ‘hurt’ and ‘home’.”

Mentally cursing his bum hand, “Can’t talk and drive. I’ll call you back when I get there.”

Gravel flew as Dan gunned the engine. Rich couldn’t have been gone more than a half an hour, forty-five minutes tops. What could have happened?

Even though only a couple of miles separated their houses, the drive seemed to take forever. Dan’s imagination went crazy with scenarios. He wrecked his truck? He fell? If all he could say was two words, whatever it was must be bad.

He slowed as he approached the house, afraid if Rich was lying in the drive somewhere he’d run over him in his haste. The headlights revealed the truck in the carport. As he drew nearer, he saw a body lying on the porch.

Pulling up so the headlights shone on Rich, Dan jumped from the truck and rushed to his friend’s side. “Fuck!”

Blood covered Rich’s face. His shirt was torn and his chest revealed skin already bruising. Beaten? Dan checked his pulse, relieved to find it strong but rapid.

“Rich! Talk to me, Rich.” His unconscious friend didn’t bother to answer. “Who did this?”

Unwilling to move him for fear of making things worse, Dan grabbed the keys lying near Rich’s body. He ran into the house for blankets.

Flipping the porch light on his way back out, he saw blood and scrapes on Rich’s knuckles. Whoever did it, Rich left his mark on them. Dan fumed at the idea of someone attacking his friend.

Sirens screamed from the highway as he tucked the blankets around him. Dressed only in a sweat suit, Dan should be feeling the cold as well, but his anger kept him warm enough.

“Hang on, Rich. Help’s coming.” He leaned over and kissed the dark wavy hair. “Help’s coming.”

* * * * *

The ride to the hospital was excruciating in more than one way. Dan wanted to hold Rich’s hand, stroke his face and hair and tell him he loved him too. Tell him he was sorry. Instead he watched the paramedic—Jason—checking him over and radioing information to the hospital.

“You okay, Dan?”

“Yeah, just shock, I guess. Who would want to hurt Rich? It doesn’t make sense.”

“Well, there are rumors…” Jason cut his gaze away.

“Rumors? About what?”

“About Rich.” With a guilty look, Jason ducked his head. “I shouldn’t say anything.”

“No, tell me. It could help find who did this.” When the man just shrugged, Dan continued. “Unless you were party to it?”

“No! I would never… I mean, it’s probably not true…”

The conversation ended abruptly as the ambulance pulled up to the emergency room. Dan already knew what rumors the man meant. He didn’t need it spelled out.

Ben Wheeler was waiting at the door as the gurney sped through them.

“You boys got something against me getting a full night’s sleep?”

“Ben, someone beat him. Bad.” Dan couldn’t keep the pain out of his voice.

“I know, son. Heard on the radio, talked to Mary Ann. Already sent deputies to the house to see if they could find any clues.”

“Why? He’s never hurt anyone.” His anger overflowed into his tone.

Ben’s smile held only sympathy and understanding. A comforting arm slipped around his shoulder as they entered the waiting room. “Who knows, son. But we’ll find them.”

“Do you think it has anything to do with the rumors Sharon Rodgers is spreading?”

“Don’t know. Not that anyone would listen to that spiteful woman. As I said, we’ll find out and we’ll take care of it. Legally.” The last word had the authority of the sheriff’s office behind it.

Anna Schuster interrupted any further conversation. “You boys like visiting me on the night shift, don’t you?”

“How is he?” Dan jumped out of the chair he’d just sat in.

“He’s headed down to X-ray. I want to make sure nothing’s broken. He’ll get a CAT scan while there to check for head trauma. Had quite a bump on the back of his head. Someone messed him up. Don’t think his nose is broken but I wouldn’t be surprised. His right eye will definitely have a shiner. Side of his mouth busted up a little.” Anna shook her head. “Quick look appears like most of the beating was body blows. I’m just glad he was able to call for help. If he’d passed out before he made that call, he could have died from shock and exposure.”

Dan dropped into the chair. He closed his eyes against the rising anger. No one had the right to do this, no matter who Rich slept with. If Dan hadn’t been so concerned about someone finding out about Rich and him, this wouldn’t have happened. The two of them would be safe and warm in Dan’s bed. The pain gripping his heart and gut forced a moan from his lips.

“Dan, you okay?” Anna’s voice reminded him of his audience. Her eyes met his with understanding and concern.

“Yeah… I just… I can’t believe anyone would hurt him.”

“He’ll be okay. It’ll be your turn to take care of him.” Anna patted Dan’s shoulder. “That’s what best friends are for, right?”

“Yeah… Thanks, Anna.” Best friends—lovers.

Ben’s hand squeezed his shoulder briefly. He looked up to see the same expression of kindness from the older man. He doubted either of them would be so sympathetic if they knew what caused him so much pain.

* * * * *

Rich woke in a daze. The white walls of the hospital room caused him concern. The pain in most of his body downright scared him. His throat was dry and sore and his mouth was swollen. He wasn’t sure he could drink anything. Fumbling for the button to call for a nurse, his hand found warm flesh. A slight squeeze brought Dan’s head up.

“You’re awake.” Relief flooded the whispered words.

“Thirsty…” The word was no more than a hoarse croak but he was thankful Dan understood.

“Ice chips…” Dan said as he opened the thermal mug sitting on the table.

Rich’s nod was barely more than movement of his eyes. His neck hurt. Actually, it would be easier to figure out what didn’t. A careful spoon slipped between his cracked lips. The trickle of melted ice teased his throat.

“More…”

The creases around Dan’s eyes gentled with relief. Even if he couldn’t love him, Dan did care. Knowing it didn’t make the situation between them easier.

“What happened?” Rich didn’t remember much about what happened. The last clear memory was the fight with Dan. The drive home was a little foggy. After that it was a blur of anger, pain and fear.

“You’re going to be okay. No concussion, no permanent damage.” Dan’s voice was soothing. Rich leaned toward Dan’s hand as he caressed Rich’s head.

“I remember…” Rich’s mind didn’t want to focus.

“What do you remember?” Dan encouraged.

“Leaving your house…” The few words made his lip hurt more. He shook his head.

“Someone jumped you on your porch last night. Left you there. You called 911 before you passed out.”

“Who?”

“Don’t know. Ben’s working on it.”

Rich closed his eyes, giving in to the exhaustion deep in his bones. The gentle hand smoothed his forehead and hair as he drifted off.

Chapter Eight

Dan snatched his hand away from Rich’s hair as the door opened.

Anna’s tired smile warmed him. “How’s he doing?”

“He woke up. I gave him some ice.”

“That’s good. I’m getting ready to go off duty. Do you want a ride home?”

Dan shook his head before he thought about how it would look.

“He’ll be all right. You don’t have to stay.”

“I know.” The hell with how it looked. He wasn’t going anywhere. Someone almost killed Rich and until they were caught, he wasn’t leaving.

“At least get some sleep. You can use the other bed. We shouldn’t need it.”

Dan glanced over at the bed in question. What he really wanted was to curl up around Rich, hold him and protect him.

Anna came farther into the room. “It’s not your fault, Dan. You couldn’t have stopped it.”

“I could’ve prevented it. He was up at my house last night. He planned to stay.” Heat flushed across Dan’s chest and fluttered up his chest. “He’s been staying a lot, helping me with the…” Dan raised his injured hand. He took a deep breath. “We had a stupid fight and I all but threw him out. If I hadn’t…”

“You couldn’t have known what would happen. You can’t blame yourself.”

Dan’s hand reached for Rich. His fingers combed through his dark hair. “Yes, I can.” He wished she’d go away. His throat tightened with heavy emotion. He couldn’t look at her. Guilt overwhelmed him.

Warm, soft arms wrapped around him. The gentle embrace intensified his agony.

“It’s okay, Dan.” Her hands ran comforting circles on his back. “He’s your friend and he’s been hurt, but he will get better.”

“If I hadn’t chased him off last night…”

“Shush, it’s still not your fault. Ben will take care of finding who did this. It has nothing to do with you.”

“But it does! I know it does! Sharon’s been spreading rumors about him to get back at me. Whoever did this probably did it because of the rumors.” He couldn’t stop the words.

“Then it’s Sharon’s fault. Not yours. You didn’t break up with her because of Rich. She has no right to drag him into it. She’s just a spiteful bitch.”

“But you don’t know what she’s been saying!”

“Yes, I do. The hospital is almost as bad about gossip as the grocery store. And her little posse works here, remember?”

Dan pulled away from her in shock. “What have you heard?”

“There’s a whole laundry list. About him, about you. It doesn’t matter. Most people look at the source and shrug it off.”

“What exactly has she been saying?” Dan didn’t really want to hear it but he needed to know.

Anna released her hold on him and sat on the empty bed. She patted the mattress for Dan to join her.

“First, she started telling everyone Rich was gay. That he caused you and her to break up. She claimed he’s after you and he convinced you she wasn’t good enough for you.” Anna laughed. “As if anyone is right for that spiteful bitch.”

“Yeah, really.” Dan tried to make light of the rumor, but his weak laugh probably didn’t help.

“Then she tried to claim he smacked her around the night he busted her for DUI. She changed that to he tried to get in her pants in exchange for dropping the ticket. Then she went back to claiming he’s gay and trying to get in your pants.”

Anna’s soft snort made Dan smile in spite of his fears.

“Dan, honey, she’s told so many stories even she can’t keep them straight. No one believes her. The only ones who repeat it are her little clique of friends. Most of them don’t even believe her. I caught two of her so-called best friends laughing about it. They were trying to figure out why Rich would even want in her pants if he was gay!”

The band of tension encircling Dan’s chest eased a little. “If no one believes her then why would someone do this to him?” He looked at the battered figure of his friend.

“I don’t know. Maybe someone he arrested? Or maybe someone was stupid enough to believe her. Regardless, he’s a good man and didn’t deserve it whether he’s gay or not.”

“What if he was?”

“Gay?”

“Yeah…” Dan couldn’t believe he’d asked.

“His own business… What a waste though!” Anna laughed as she slid off the bed. “Still staying? The offer of a ride is still open.”

“Staying. I don’t want him to wake up alone.”

“Okay.” Anna smiled as she leaned over and kissed his cheek.

* * * * *

Dizziness engulfed Dan as he tried to wake. The noise of a cell phone was irritating enough without the massive headache. He scrambled off the bed to grab the offending thing. In his sleepy state, he didn’t realize it was Rich’s cell until he’d already answered.

“Hello,” he growled into the phone.

“Rich?”

“No, this is Dan. Who’s this?”

“Jeremy. Where’s Rich?”

Jeremy, Jer. Rich’s Memphis friend. Jealousy overwhelmed him, his headache forgotten. “He’s asleep. As was I.” Dan knew what it sounded like and didn’t care.

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

The pain in the voice on the other end made Dan ashamed of his words. “Wait! Don’t hang up. Rich’s been injured. I’m at the hospital with him.”

“Injured? What happened? Is he okay?” The concern in the rushing words was genuine.

“Someone attacked him—beat him up on his front porch—late last night.”

“Oh my God—”

Dan broke in before he gave Jeremy the wrong idea. “He’ll be okay. He’s pretty bruised but nothing broken and no permanent damage.”

“Did they catch the guys?”

“Not yet. Sheriff Wheeler has everyone available on it. Can’t have someone beating up cops and getting away with it.”

“What hospital? I’m coming there.”

Dan didn’t want to meet the man who’d been such an intimate part of Rich’s life but he had a right to be here. He gave Jeremy the details and directions before he hung up.

After the call ended, Dan thought about what it would look like. A man no one knew about, claiming to be a friend of Rich’s, showing up when he was injured. With the rumors running rampant, it could look bad. He almost called Jeremy and told him not to come but he didn’t think it would do any good.

A moan from the bed distracted him from one dilemma to another. Rich’s right eye was so swollen it was hard to tell if it was open.

“Hey there,” Dan whispered. His fingers squeezed Rich’s with care. The grazed knuckles would be as sore as the rest of him.

“Hi… Hurts…”

“Okay, I’ll get a nurse. We’ll get you some good drugs.”

Rich nodded and closed his bloodshot eyes. Dan decided not to tell him Jeremy was on the way.

* * * * *

Rich’s gaze followed Dan as he left the room. He didn’t know how long he’d been here but his friend looked like hell. From the way he felt, he figured he looked worse. He raised his hand to his swollen mouth. His fingers moved farther up to his nose. Again, swollen flesh met his inquiring touch. He pinched the bridge gently. Not broken. He didn’t need to feel his eye to know what it looked like. He forced his eye open. His vision blurred before he shut it again.

Still, he could see the concern on Dan’s face when he looked at him. And the guilt. Rich knew his friend would blame himself for this. If he hadn’t left Dan’s house last night, it wouldn’t have happened. At least not last night. Memories of the event slowly crept back.

The door opened to reveal Dan and a nurse Rich didn’t recognize.

She smiled at him as she handed him a pill. “Here you go. Should help ease the aches and pains.”

He tried to smile his gratitude but whimpered it instead. Smiling was definitely off the to-do list for a while. Rich eased the pill between his lips and took a cup of water from Dan. His mouth didn’t wrap around the straw very well but he managed enough water to swallow the medicine.

“You should keep this on your eye.” She wrapped an ice pack in a towel then handed it to him. “Should bring the swelling down pretty quick.”

“Thanks,” Rich mumbled.

The nurse patted his shoulder then left.

“I remember some of what happened,” Rich announced.

“Do you know who it was?”

“No, didn’t see their faces. Dark.” His words slurred. The drugs didn’t help his lips move better. “I forgot to turn on the porch light when I left. Motion detector light should have come on but didn’t.”

“They may have broken it. I’ll let Ben know to check it. Any clue as to who they were?”

“No,” Rich sighed. “At least three. Two holding me—another hitting.” His throat closed in remembered panic. For a brief moment, before he passed out, he thought he was going to die.

Dan’s fingers slipped under his. Rich’s hand closed in small squeeze of gratitude.

“May have been four. I thought I heard someone else… Not close enough to be one of the ones holding me.”

“Did they say anything? Something that might let you know why?”

Rich’s mind tried to push past the memory of pain and fear. “Someone said I deserved worse. I tried to ask why. Didn’t know what they were talking about.” His eyes closed as the feeling of the punch in the mouth swept over him. “They kept saying I knew what I did. Playing stupid wouldn’t help me.” His eyes opened as Dan’s fingers slid through his hair. “It’s not your fault, Dan.”

“I shouldn’t have—”

“Couldn’t have known someone was waiting for me.”

“I shouldn’t have panicked. Sharon’s presence scared me. I don’t—”

“Still not your fault. If I hadn’t gone home then, it could have happened some other time. Can’t blame yourself.”

“I can too. I’m sorry. About everything.”

“Me too. I understand. I know it’s difficult. I do love you but I won’t push it anymore.” Sleep pulled his eyes closed. “Sleep now…”

His dreams started with a beard-roughened cheek sliding against his jaw, full lips kissing at his ear and a soft, whispered “God help me, I love you too”.

Dan pulled away from Rich’s ear. His emotions were in complete turmoil. He should be careful. Anyone could walk in and catch him whispering sweet nothings in Rich’s ear. At the moment, he was too tired and emotionally wrung out to care.

The fact Jeremy was on the way didn’t help. The few words exchanged with Rich’s mystery lover hadn’t revealed much, but the concern in his voice was genuine. The fact he was coming all the way from Memphis to see him said a lot.

Dan couldn’t picture the man, had no idea what he looked like, what he did for a living. His tired mind couldn’t think straight, but his emotions were awake enough to resent Jeremy. He didn’t need to come here. Dan would take care of Rich. Jeremy wasn’t needed or wanted. At least by Dan.

Maybe Rich would feel different.

A soft knock on the door warned him before it opened. He released Rich’s fingers. He hadn’t realized he was still holding on.

Ben’s face was a welcome sight. “How’s he doing?”

“He’s asleep. He remembered some things. Said there were at least three of them, probably four. You might want to check the motion detector light. Rich said it didn’t come on. They probably messed with it. I doubt there’ll be fingerprints. As cold as it was last night, they probably wore gloves.”

“Can’t hurt to check.” Ben pulled a pen and a small notepad out of his jacket pocket, made a few quick notes then tucked them away again.

“Have you made any progress?”

Ben sat on the edge of the empty bed with a sigh. The lines in his face were deep with exhaustion. “No, not really. John found a piece of two-by-four with traces of blood on it. Guess they hit Rich in the head with it when he tried to fight back. Doubt we’ll find anything else on it.” He clasped his hands together behind his head then stretched his arms with a small groan. “I’ve put out bulletins asking for any information about vehicles in the area last night. It was so late I doubt anyone was around to see anything. Not like there are a lot of people roaming the county at midnight.”

“No… Guess not.” Something nagged at his tired brain. He couldn’t put his finger on it. Something important. “But…” It hit him hard when it did. “Sharon!”

“What about her, son?”

“She came up to the house last night. Around eleven. Rich was at my place. He left shortly after that. She might have seen something.”

Ben clucked his tongue. “Not sure she’ll be real willing to help us, considering how she feels about Rich and her arrest and all.”

“She was driving. I don’t think anyone else was with her. Didn’t she lose her license?”

“You know, son. You got a point there. I think I need to have a talk with that young lady.”

“I’m going with you.” Dan couldn’t sit around and wait for information. “They just gave him pain meds. He’ll be out of it for a while.”

“We’ll stop by your place on the way. You need some clothes and a coat.”

Dan looked down at the wrinkled sweats and shoes with no socks. His only thought last night was getting to Rich. He grinned at Ben and nodded. In spite of Ben’s presence, he brushed his hand over Rich’s hair one last time before they left.

* * * * *

Showered and dressed in jeans and a warm sweater, Dan sat next to Ben in the SUV the sheriff used as an official vehicle. A coat and scarf added to the heat in the enclosed space. Lack of sleep and the warmth made him drowsy as they drove to Sharon’s dad’s place.

Although she was almost thirty, Sharon still lived with her father. Her mother died thirteen years ago of breast cancer and Sharon had ruled the roost ever since.

“Let me do the talking when we get there. She’s still pretty pissed at you as well as Rich. Just stand there and look menacing.” Ben grinned at Dan’s laugh.

“Menacing I can do. Especially after the way she’s been treating Rich.”

“He’s a good man. Doesn’t deserve her disrespect. Definitely didn’t deserve last night.” Ben’s jaw clenched on the words. The older man was fond of all his deputies, treated them like kin, but he seemed to have a soft spot for Rich, always had.

“I know. She’s been spreading gossip about him. Do you think it led to his attack?”

“You think it was gay bashing?”

Ben’s words startled him even though it was what Dan thought. “You think someone would do it just based on Sharon’s word? I mean, Rich’s never done anything to make someone think he’s gay.” Dan couldn’t share Rich’s secrets with Ben, but he was curious as to what the older man thought.

“Don’t know.” Ben rubbed his hand across his mouth. “Rich is pretty closemouthed about his love life. People might take what Sharon said, put it together with his dating history and come to their own conclusions.”

“Who would be stupid enough to beat up a deputy based on gossip?”

“We have a few around here just about that stupid.” Ben’s amused tone made Dan laugh. Small-town law enforcement had to put up with a lot of idiotic behavior, most of it just mischievous, but sometimes there was malicious intent as well.

The SUV pulled up the road to the Rodgers place. It was a nice house, expensive for this area, but Mr. Rodgers’ had the money for it. Not only did he own several car lots, his wife’s family had had money. His inheritance from his late wife kept him from needing to do anything, but he wasn’t a man to sit around on his hands. He preferred to stay busy with something. Unfortunately the money didn’t help sweeten his daughter’s disposition. If anything, it made her worse.

Dan climbed out of the vehicle and stretched. He needed some sleep but it would wait.

* * * * *

Steve Rodgers didn’t look happy when he answered the door. The sound of Sharon’s ranting in the background could be the source of his irritation.

“Come in, gentlemen. Ignore my precious princess. She’s started out the day in a bad mood.” Sarcasm dripped off his words.

His annoyance reassured Dan. The man wouldn’t be in the mood to defend her if she’d been giving him lip all morning.

“Steve, I hate to disturb you so early but we need to talk to Sharon. She may have seen something up at Rich Taylor’s place last night.”

“What’s up?” Steve’s concern and confusion was genuine.

“Rich was attacked at his place. Beat up pretty bad. Sharon had been up at Dan’s shortly before it happened. We’re hoping she might have seen a vehicle near there. Help us find who did this.”

“Sharon! Get your butt in here!”

“What?” The precious princess came into the room with her attitude wrapped around her like a shield.

“Were you up at Dan’s house last night?”

Sharon looked from Dan to her father and back to Dan. “Yes. So! What of it?”

“You said you were with that gaggle of silly geese you hang out with. Why did you lie?”

“I just wanted to give Dan another chance to change his mind. I didn’t stay long. That fag deputy was there and Dan wouldn’t let me in.”

Dan tried to tamp down the shock and anger at her words.

Steve’s hand rose as if to slap her but he held back with obvious difficulty. “Sharon Elizabeth Rodgers, I am sick and tired of hearing you bad-mouth Rich Taylor. I don’t care if he’s slept with half the men in this county, you will stop calling him that. You will learn to be respectful if I have to beat it into you.”

Steve’s words made Dan do a double take. Steve didn’t care if Rich was gay? The words washed over him again.

Ben placed a calming hand on Steve’s shoulder. “Hitting her won’t do any good, Steve, and as much as I’d like to let you, I can’t.” Ben’s glare bore holes through Sharon.

“I didn’t see anything. I don’t know who did it.” Her words were haughty and almost proud. If anything, she wholeheartedly endorsed the men who attacked Rich.

Dan wondered how she knew what they were discussing. She hadn’t been in the room when Ben told Steve what happened. He started to say something but let Ben take the lead instead.

Ben stepped between Sharon and her father. “Well, see now, Miss Rodgers, I have a deputy in the hospital. He was badly beaten and left out in the bitter cold almost unconscious. Doc says he would have died of shock and exposure if he hadn’t been able to call 911 on his cell phone. So what I’m looking for is someone to arrest for aggravated assault and battery and attempted murder. That stacks up to a lot of jail time.

“If I find out you had anything to do with this, before or after the event, you’re looking at a conspiracy, which carries about the same jail time. I don’t think you’d find prison a very happy place. So, if you know anything, you better come clean. When I catch the men who did this, and if they implicate you in their crime, there will be no leniency. You will go to jail. For a very long time. And no amount of money is going to get your pretty little butt out of this one.”

“You can bank on that, Ben. She won’t get any help from me. I’m just glad her mother isn’t around to see what she’s become.” Steve’s words, while filled with sadness, were laced with steel conviction.

Sharon’s face stayed arrogant as Ben spoke, but her father’s words caused the blood to drain from her face.

“Daddy?” The shrill harpy turned into a lost little girl before Dan’s eyes.

“I’m serious, Sharon. You’ve run roughshod over me and everyone who comes in contact with you. I’m done. You have one month to find a job and a place to live. I’m not doing you any favors letting you act the way you do. It stops now.”

“A job?”

“A job, responsibility. You need something to anchor your life. Looking for a man to make miserable isn’t the way. You’ve been engaged to every guy you’ve gone out with. I’m not even sure they realized it.”

Dan couldn’t help the small snort of laughter. He definitely hadn’t. Only Ben acted as if he’d heard him. Sharon and her father were oblivious to their audience by now.

“I can’t… I don’t… What would I do?” The panic in her voice wasn’t playacting.

Steve nodded as he swallowed hard. “I’ll make a deal with you. You go back to school, for a real education, no sororities, no partying, just to study. I’ll pay for it. You can live here until you’re done. You’ll have curfews and I expect to see decent grade reports. You break any of the rules and you’re out. I don’t care where—I don’t care how. I’ll wash my hands of you.” Sorrow tightened his voice. “You’ve embarrassed me and the memory of your mother for too long. I shouldn’t have let you get away with it but I did. I admit my responsibility but I’m going to fix it. Starting right now.”

Dan could see the tears in Steve’s eyes as he spoke. As much as Sharon drove Dan crazy, he could only imagine the angst she’d heaped on her father.

Steve continued. “If you know anything about what happened to Rich Taylor, you come clean. Now. If I find out you had any information and withheld it—anything—I’ll disown you. Right then and there.”

Dan had never seen Sharon vulnerable, but right now she looked about fifteen and completely lost.

“I…” Tears welled in her eyes as she stuttered. “I kind of told Mark Harrell…” She hesitated, her eyes darting from man to man. “Told him I’d like to…see Rich taught a lesson.” Tears fell down her face. Her sobs began to distort her words. “I…told him…I would…be really…grateful…”

She didn’t need to continue. Ben nodded at Dan. “Let’s go talk to Mr. Harrell.” He placed a hand on Steve’s shoulder. “Thank you. We still need to deal with the charge of driving without a license. You’ll need to bring her down to the office this afternoon.”

Steve’s head dipped in a sharp nod. “We’ll be there.”

They left the disappointed man staring at his sobbing daughter.

* * * * *

Dan mused in silence over Steve Rodgers’ words as Ben maneuvered the big SUV off the Rodgers property. Did he think Rich was gay? His comment about not caring who Rich slept with didn’t really sound as if he did. He was probably just trying to make a point. Or he could really care less. Ben hadn’t reacted to any of it.

They drove in silence for a few miles.

“Does the idea Rich might be gay make you uncomfortable?” Ben asked softly.

“Who said he’s gay?” Panic rose in his throat. He couldn’t out Rich to his boss.

“I didn’t say he was. I asked would the idea make you uncomfortable.”

“Maybe… Some.”

“Even though you’ve been friends for years?”

“I don’t know. I don’t really know anyone who is gay. Guess it’s all a new idea to me.” Until Rich announced his sexuality in the hotel room in Jackson, Dan didn’t think he’d even met anyone who was.

Ben’s laugh shocked him. “Son, you’re really clueless, aren’t you?”

“What do you mean?”

“There’s a number of gay men and women around this county. You know most of them.”

“I do?” His mind raced through too many faces, too many names, searching for clues.

“They don’t advertise but they’re here.” Dan started to open his mouth to ask who when Ben continued. “And no, I’m not telling you who they are. If you don’t know, it won’t make things difficult when you have to deal with them.”

“I’m not prejudiced!”

“No, but you do seem a might uncomfortable with the subject.”

Dan sealed his lips and stared out the window. He almost retorted with his reasons. Ben didn’t seem bothered by it, but he wasn’t ready to out himself any more than he was Rich.

Chapter Nine

Ben dropped him at Rich’s house so he could get his truck. He’d left it there last night when he rode in with the ambulance. Although he wanted to go with Ben to see Mark Harrell, Ben refused. If the man turned out to be the perpetrator, the sheriff was worried about Dan keeping his temper. Dan sighed as he looked at Rich’s porch. Ben was probably right.

The fear that coursed through his body last night shuddered through him again. Seeing Rich out cold on the porch, not moving, Dan’s first thought was Rich was dead. The idea made his throat constrict and his heart skip a beat.

His feelings for Rich were undeniable. He scrubbed at his face with his good hand. Last night confirmed Rich was more than just a friend. The thought of losing him had shaken Dan as much as the loss of his parents.

Bloodstains still darkened the wood but it was too cold to try to wash them off. The temperature was below freezing. Bloody ice would be worse. Besides, he’d be hampered with only one good hand.

Instead he climbed in his truck and headed back to the hospital. He’d already been gone longer than he wanted. He wondered if Jeremy was there yet. There had been plenty of time if the man left as soon as Dan received the call. Something in Jeremy’s voice made Dan think he wouldn’t have waited long.

* * * * *

Dan walked past the nurses’ station without saying a word. Most of the women on duty were friends of Sharon’s. There was no way he could be polite right now and the urge to rub Sharon’s fate in their faces was too strong.

Sharon managed to foul up her life big-time. If her dad disowned her, she’d be shit out of luck. Wanting to study nursing like the rest of her friends, she had gone to college for a couple of years. She didn’t last though. She spent all her time partying and worrying about sorority functions instead of studying. Suspended for bad grades, she never went back.

His hand on the door, he paused when he heard voices.

“Babe, you got yourself real fucked up. Where was your head at?” Babe? The strange man’s voice could only be Jeremy’s.

“I know. I was…distracted.”

“Dan.” It wasn’t a question. How much did Jeremy know about him?

“We’d had an awful fight. I was pissed and not paying attention.” Rich’s words slurred as if he’d just awakened.

Dan closed his eyes in pain. It was his fault. If Rich hadn’t been mad…

“But it’s not his fault, Jer. I pushed him too hard. I should’ve known better.”

Jeremy shushed Rich’s words. “It’s not your fault either. Are there any clues as to who did this?”

“No, not yet. I was surprised to wake up and find you here instead of him.”

“I called earlier and he answered your phone. Told me what happened. I hightailed it here.”

“You called?” The pleasure in Rich’s voice made Dan cringe. Stupid reaction, of course he’d be happy to hear from his lover.

“Yeah, wanted to tell you the captain is hot to get you into the squad. He said out of all the applications he’s received, yours stands head and shoulders above the others.”

Dan eased out of the doorway before he heard Rich’s reply. Rich was leaving? Leaving him and going to Jeremy? His mind reeled as he stumbled back down the corridor.

Sitting in his truck in the parking lot, he didn’t remember the elevator ride or actually leaving the hospital. His brain kept looping around the idea of Rich leaving here, leaving him.

When had he made this decision? His eyes closed as the memory of Rich’s words, his hands and his mouth, of the passion of last night washed over him. And Rich knew he was leaving the entire time.

Dan turned on the truck and squealed tires out of the parking lot. He had to get as far away from Rich and his lover as he could. Unfortunately he had nowhere to go but home.

* * * * *

“I don’t know anymore, Jer.” Rich couldn’t think about leaving just yet. “Dan… We kind of… Well, before the fight…”

“I see.” Jeremy’s smile was tight.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know if I can leave now. I don’t know what to do. My brain’s too fried at the moment to think clearly.”

“You love him. It’s not easy.”

“I’m sorry about…everything.”

“It’s always an option and available if you need it.” Jeremy planted a soft kiss on his forehead. “I do understand.”

“Thanks. You’re a great friend. I’m sorry it can’t be more.” Not after last night. Even if Dan couldn’t handle their relationship now, his actions today made Rich hope Dan could accept his sexuality eventually. Rich couldn’t run away if the barest chance remained. He really didn’t think he’d dreamed the caress and the words whispered in his ear this morning.

Rich kept the conversation neutral after that. The pain meds kept him groggy and drifting in and out of consciousness. At least some of the swelling in his face had started to subside—especially his eye.

He was beginning to worry about Dan. The nurse said he left with Ben, but Rich expected him back before now. When Ben poked his head in the door, Rich craned his neck to see if Dan was behind him.

“How ya feeling, son?” Ben was mighty chipper.

“Better, I guess. They’re letting me out later today. They’re trying to scare up a doctor to sign me out.”

“You got a ride home?”

Rich nodded toward Jeremy. “Jeremy said he’d take me home.”

“Hi there,” Ben said to the other man.

Rich shook his head at his own lack of manners. “I’m sorry. Ben, this is Detective Jeremy Lawson. Jeremy, this is Sheriff Ben Wheeler.”

“You’re Rich’s friend from Memphis.”

“Yes sir. I came up as soon as I heard what happened. Any break in the case?” Jeremy went all business.

“Actually yes, there is.”

“There is?” Rich was startled to hear the news.

Ben grimaced. “Turns out Miss Rodgers told a little fib about the night you arrested her.”

“Fib?”

“Yep, seems she told Mark Harrell you’d roughed her up a little bit. He decided that cop or no cop you needed a lesson.” Ben shook his head. “Seems he and his friends got a little carried away. All four are behind bars and Miss Rodgers’ father has put the stomp down on his little princess. She shapes up and flies right or she can say goodbye to house, home and money. Her daddy’s threatened to disown her.”

Rich didn’t know what to feel—relief it wasn’t related to his sexuality, anger over Sharon’s lies, or confusion over the whole incident. One thing was missing though…

“Where’s Dan?”

Ben shook his head. “I was about to ask you the same question. I dropped him off at your place earlier to pick up his truck. I thought he was headed back up here. At least it’s what he said. I was a little surprised you didn’t already know we had a suspect. He was with me at the Rodgers place.”

“He hasn’t been here.” Rich chewed his lower lip. Dan really shouldn’t be driving with his bad hand. Could something have happened to him? Of course not. Ben would have heard about it by now. “Maybe he changed his mind. I’ll call him in a little while.”

Jeremy smiled. “Sheriff Wheeler, I haven’t had time to get anything to eat. Would you care to join me for some good old-fashioned hospital food?”

Ben laughed and nodded. “I think that’s a good idea but you need to call me Ben.”

Jeremy set Rich’s cell phone near his hand before he left. “We won’t be long.”

* * * * *

Dan sat staring at the fireplace. He hadn’t bothered to light a fire but it was as good a place as any to stare. Rich was leaving. Dan should feel relieved. Temptation out of the way, he could get on with his life without all the confusion. But relief didn’t make his chest hurt and his eyes sting. Rich had this planned before last night. Dan’s head hurt to go along with his chest.

Lack of sleep fogged his troubled mind. He’d dozed a little last night after he and Rich…before the fight. He might have nodded off at the hospital a couple of times but never for very long.

Bed, he thought. He should just go to bed. The last time he was there naked flesh warmed his back and Rich’s strong arm draped across his waist. He wasn’t sure he could ever sleep in that bed again.

A chill shivered through him as his mind replayed last night. How Rich’s calloused hands teased his skin and how his hot mouth engulfed Dan’s dick. The cold in the room didn’t dampen the heat in his groin. God help him, he wanted it again and more.

Last night he’d chickened out of tasting Rich’s cock, but he couldn’t get the thought out of his mind. Since it looked as if he’d never get another chance, he wished he had.

Dan’s hand rubbed his cock through his jeans. Right now he’d give anything to feel Rich’s hard dick rubbing against his. Or against his ass.

His body shuddered at the idea of Rich’s cock pressing against his ass, pushing into him as his finger had. It was best they hadn’t gone further. Dan wasn’t sure he could ever be satisfied with a woman again if he had.

Mirthless laughter sounded in the cold air. The idea of a woman’s soft body against him, a wet pussy around his cock did nothing for him. The thought of Rich’s hand gripping him, his hot tongue teasing him nearly made him come.

He conjured the vision of another man’s hands caressing him. The idea of someone else touching him didn’t have the same effect. Dan couldn’t decide if he was gay, or straight and confused. Rich had spoiled him for women and he didn’t seem to find other men attractive. So it all boiled down to Rich. He loved him and wanted him, but it was too late. Rich was leaving.

And if Rich stayed? Would it make a difference? Could Dan accept the idea of people knowing about them, about him?

He would have to. He couldn’t change the way he felt. Being around Rich every day and not want, not touch—not possible. If Rich left, he wouldn’t have to worry about it. If Rich stayed, Dan would give in to his newly awakened desires.

The phone startled him out of his thoughts. He almost didn’t answer it when he saw Rich’s cell number on the caller ID. Something could be wrong. He had to answer. “Hello.”

“Dan?”

“Hey, Rich. How’re you feeling?” Dan forced his voice to stay even.

“Tired. Hurting. But I’m alive. And the doctor insists I’ll stay that way.”

“That’s good to hear.” Dan chuckled.

“Where you at?”

“Home. I’m tired. Needed some rest.” Not that he’d get any.

“Ben said they arrested Mark Harrell and his friends.”

“That’s good.” Dan’s throat tried to close on him. “Hope they go away for a long time.”

“Yeah. Are you coming back up here later?”

“Maybe. I need some sleep.” Dan couldn’t help his next question. “Did Jeremy get there?”

“Yeah. He’s downstairs getting something to eat with Ben.” Rich hesitated for a minute. “I was hoping you’d be here when I woke up.”

“Jeremy’s there. He’ll take care of you. I’m just really tired.” And he was. Tired of holding back all the things he wanted to say but couldn’t. Tired of dealing with feelings he didn’t know how to handle.

“Okay. I should be home later this afternoon. Talk to you then?” Rich sounded disappointed, but Dan decided he imagined it. Jeremy was here. The man he was moving to Memphis to be with was with him.

“Yeah. I’ll call you later.”

* * * * *

Rich stared at the phone after it went dead. Dan sounded so out of it. Maybe it was exhaustion, but he couldn’t be sure. He wanted to talk to him away from possible interruptions. He’d call him again once he was home. Of course Jeremy never said how long he was planning to stay. Talk about awkward situations…

Dan’s tone nagged at him—so sad, hopeless.

Relaxing into the pillow, Rich ran through the past few weeks. He’d gone from friends with Dan to lovers, from lovers with Jeremy to finding out his old friend was in love with him, and from healthy to a hospital bed in a few weeks. His mind reeled at the changes.

Although it wouldn’t be easy, he was determined to stay and work things out with Dan. Whether as friends or as lovers, he wasn’t sure, but the relationship was too valuable to lose.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The aches and pains of his injuries couldn’t match his heavy heart.

The door swooshed open. Jeremy’s voice was almost a whisper. “Hi there.”

Rich opened his eyes. “Hey.”

“I thought you were asleep.”

“Nah, just thinking.” Rich shook his head.

Jeremy slipped into the room and let the door close behind him. “Did you talk to Dan?”

“Yeah.” Emotion caught Rich off guard and strangled his voice. He cleared his throat. “He’s at home. Said he was tired. Needed rest.”

“You should talk to him soon.” Jeremy’s sad brown eyes captured Rich’s gaze.

“I’m so sor—”

“Don’t apologize again. I’ve always known how things stood.” Jeremy grinned. “I’m not going to pine away to nothing over it.”

Rich had to smile at the idea of his burly friend mopping around like a lovesick teenager. “I know. I feel like I’ve been using you all these years.”

“I’ve been using you. I knew I’d never get what I really wanted out of the relationship, but I’ve enjoyed the time we spent together. So we both got something out of it, even if it wasn’t everything.” Jeremy ran a hand through Rich’s hair. “I’ll drop you off then I’m heading back to Memphis.”

“You just got here. You should stay—”

“Nope.” Jeremy shook his head. “I heard the jealousy in Dan’s voice when he answered the phone. He wouldn’t like me hanging around and it won’t help your case. Going home is the best answer.”

Rich didn’t bother to protest further. Jeremy was right. He and Dan needed to talk and soon.

* * * * *

Dan’s eyelids, grainy with heavy sleep, peeled open as the crunch of gravel announced an approaching car.

With the fireplace cold, a chill had settled in the room. The windows revealed the weak rays of the setting sun. Nightfall would make the old house even colder. The crocheted afghan of his grandmother’s, yanked from the back of the couch, didn’t cover him completely. His left arm and injured hand were almost numb with cold.

The slam of a car door forced him up. Scrubbing his good hand over his face, Dan hesitated. The only person he wanted to see was Rich. With Jeremy here, the likelihood of his friend showing up was slim.

Footsteps crossed the old wooden porch and a gentle rapping sounded through the door. “Dan?” The barrier muffled Rich’s voice.

Dan leaped for the door. His hand on the doorknob, he paused for a deep breath. His pride demanded he not react to Rich’s news of his move to Memphis.

Part of him wondered why Rich was on his doorstep and not with Jeremy.

Another soft knock made him turn the knob. Arctic air blasted past Rich and into the house. The weak late-afternoon sun did nothing to warm the day.

“Hi.” Dan forced a smile.

“Hi.”

Dan shivered then pulled the door open wide. “Come in.” He shrank back against the door as Rich walked in. A quick look outside confirmed Jeremy wasn’t here. Rich’s truck sat in the drive, not in the carport. Dan took it as a sign Rich wasn’t staying long.

He pushed the door closed then turned to face the man who had changed his life forever.

Rich shrugged out of his coat then tossed it on the arm of the couch. “Damn, it’s freezing in here.” He walked to the fireplace without looking at Dan. Kneeling next to the hearth, he pulled the shovel from the stand and shoveled ash into a bucket sitting nearby. Then he reached for kindling in a wooden box nearby.

After stacking several small pieces of wood in the middle of the fireplace, he struck a match and started the fire. “Why didn’t you come back to the hospital?” Rich’s voice was so low Dan almost missed the words.

“You didn’t need me. Jeremy was there.”

Rich shook his head. His shoulders tensed as he set a few logs over the flame. He rocked back on his heels, staring at the fire. “I’ll always need you.”

“Doesn’t matter now.”

Standing, Rich whirled around to face Dan. His brown eyes were clouded but his face neutral. “Yes, it does. I love you. I won’t push it if you can’t love me back. Whatever happens, I need you in my life. Whether friend or lover or both.”

“And what about Jeremy?” Hope welled in Dan’s heart.

“He’s on his way home.”

Dan stumbled back to the couch. “And you? When are you leaving?” He bit his lip at his slip of the tongue.

Shaking his head, Rich followed him. “I’m not leaving. Why—” His eyes narrowed. “You came back to the hospital, didn’t you? Heard Jeremy talking about Memphis.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Dan dropped his gaze as a flush warmed his face.

“Yes, I was thinking about moving to Memphis.” Rich sat on the couch next to Dan, close but not touching. “But after last night, I couldn’t go. If you’d eavesdropped a little longer, you would have heard me tell him that.”

Dan chanced a glance at Rich’s face. A slight smile crooked his swollen lips.

“You’re not going.”

“Nope.” Rich emphasized his words with a slow shake of his head.

Nervous tension gave way to sexual. A small gasp snuck out between Dan’s lips. He eased back on the couch and closed his eyes.

A dip in the cushion signaled a shift in Rich’s position. The heat of Rich’s thigh touched his. “So now what?”

“I don’t know.”

Rich’s breath teased his ear. “I love you but I’ll go along with whatever you want.”

Decision time. Dan could stall Rich—ask for time. The idea was tempting, but time wouldn’t change the facts. “I love you too.” The words tore the breath out of him. “I’m not sure I can handle people knowing…about us.”

“Then we go back to the way things were before.” Rich’s shoulders slumped as he sighed.

Dan shook his head. “I can’t go back either.”

“Maybe it would be best if I moved.”

“No!” Dan clamped his good hand on Rich’s thigh. “No,” he said softer. “I want you here.” He met Rich’s puzzled gaze. “I want you.”

Rich’s expression softened. His bruised hand covered Dan’s. “You’re sure?”

Was he? Dan nodded. “For so long I’ve looked for someone I could spend my life with. Now that I’ve found him, how am I supposed to walk away?”

Rich grinned as he leaned toward Dan. The sweet kiss ended quick with a groan from Rich. He raised one hand to his mouth. Fingers ran across his swollen lip. “Seems I’m a little handicapped at the moment.”

“We’ll work around it.”

Rich’s mouth quirked a half grin. “Sounds interesting.”

Dan’s heart raced at the ideas running through his head. The need to crawl into Rich’s skin with him grew unbearable. But Rich was safe, he was here and he wasn’t going anywhere.

Emotion grabbed Dan’s throat in a stranglehold. Life would be different but the searching emptiness haunting him was gone.

He traced Rich’s injured lip with the tip of his finger. “If I hadn’t made you leave…”

Rich shook his head. His fingers pressed against Dan’s mouth. “Not your fault.”

“Yes it is.” Dan wrapped his hand around Rich’s wrist, pulling gentle fingers away. Glancing down, he examined the scraped knuckles. He touched his lips to the marred flesh in featherlight kisses. “I shouldn’t have panicked. I heard you with Jeremy. You said our fight distracted you. Didn’t realize someone was there.”

“It wouldn’t have done much good if I had. Four to one aren’t good odds.” Rich leaned in then brushed his lips against Dan’s.

“Damn…” The idea of Rich facing four assailants alone, in the dark, sent terror-filled adrenaline sweeping through Dan. He wrapped his arms around Rich and pulled him tight. Rich’s soft gasp made him ease on his grip. “Sorry,” he mumbled against the soft skin of Rich’s neck.

Rich’s body comforted Dan. Strong arms tightened around him.

The growing heat from the fireplace couldn’t compare to the warmth of Rich’s embrace.

Need sent excitement coursing through Dan. Desire curled through his groin, filling his cock. His lips tasted the skin of Rich’s neck. His fingers teased up and down Rich’s spine.

A soft gasp combined with strong fingers twisting the back of Dan’s sweatshirt. Warm lips suckled Dan’s earlobe. “You realize you’re starting something…” Rich’s breath tickled Dan’s ear.

“Uh-huh…”

“Are you sure?” Wistful hope seasoned Rich’s words.

“Yeah.” Dan eased away from Rich just enough so he could meet his lover’s gaze. “Very sure.” His thoughts kept returning to his dreams of Rich. “I want to feel you inside me.”

“Fuck…” Rich’s fingers dug into Dan’s back. “We don’t have to—”

“I want to. I can’t stop thinking about it.” Even as he spoke his cock stiffened.

“We should take things slow.” A lopsided smile graced Rich’s mouth. “You don’t have anything to prove.”

Dan shook his head. “Not trying to prove anything.” Dragging in a deep breath, Dan blurted his words. “Been thinking about it for a while. Long before my accident.”

“What?” Rich’s brow furrowed with confusion.

Nodding, Dan glanced down. He focused on an imaginary spot on Rich’s shirt. “No need to get into specifics, but I dreamed about you, about…it…” His gaze darted up to catch Rich’s expression.

Rich’s mouth alternated between a grin and a frown. “You dreamed about me—us?” The frown won. “When? How?”

“Later. I’ll explain everything later.” Dan slipped his hand around Rich’s waist. “But for now…” He pressed his palm against Rich’s cock. “I want to know what you feel like. Not a vague dream.”

Fear and anticipation warred within Dan. While his dreams were explicit, he knew it wouldn’t compare to reality. As much as he didn’t want to wait, maybe… Waiting wouldn’t change the need coursing through him, making his cock ache with desire. Wouldn’t change the swell of emotion clogging his throat.

Rich’s wounded mouth didn’t stop his hard kiss.

Heat swirled through Dan as his tongue tangled with Rich’s. His good hand cupped the back of Rich’s neck. Doubt fled under the assault of passionate kisses.

Fleeting touches weren’t enough. Twisting his body toward Rich’s, he sought more contact. The couch wouldn’t work for what he needed. “Bedroom,” he mumbled. “Now.”

After a final tight hug, Rich released him then stood.

Dan rolled off the couch then to his feet. His fingers clutched the front of Rich’s shirt. Dan walked backward as he tugged Rich toward the bedroom. A grin took up residence on Dan’s face. He imagined he looked goofy but he couldn’t help himself.

A matching, although uneven grin plastered across Rich’s lips. “I love you.” Rich’s words were soft and full of awe.

Stopping abruptly, Dan pulled Rich into a tight hug. “Oh God, I love you too.” Emotion tightened his chest, forcing breath from his lungs.

Wrapped in Rich’s arms, they shuffled through the bedroom door and the last few feet to the bed.

Mouths met again in a fury, heedless of Rich’s injuries. Soft whimpers and breathless gasps accompanied searing kisses. Bodies pressed tight, erections bumping.

“I need you.” Dan pushed his groin into Rich’s.

A rough hand slipped into the back of Dan’s sweatpants. Cold fingers warmed against his ass.

When fingers dipped into the valley between his cheeks, Dan pushed back against them. “Please…” He groaned with disappointment when the now-warm hand disappeared.

Rich tugged the hem of Dan’s shirt up.

Moving away from Rich’s heat, Dan let him pull his shirt over his head. Gentle fingers slipped the sleeve over his cast.

Dan waved his injured hand in the air. “I’ll be glad when this damn thing comes off.”

“Yeah. But it served a purpose I never dreamed it would.”

Strange how life worked. If Dan had never had the accident, never needed Rich’s help… Would he still be searching for the perfect woman?

Rich stripped off his own shirt.

The muscled chest and flat nipples were too tempting. Dan leaned over then swiped his tongue across a nipple. A soft moan encouraged him. Sharp sucking peaked the tiny morsel of flesh. Dan added a gentle nip of teeth and strong arms wrapped around him as reward for his efforts.

His hand cupped the bulge in Rich’s tight jeans.

Rich pushed forward into the pressure. “Oh God…”

Smiling against the broad chest, Dan moved his hand away. His fingers tugged open the button of Rich’s jeans. He teased the zipper open in slow motion.

The tip of Rich’s thick cock peeked over the top of his briefs. Moisture glistened on the slit.

Dan slipped his hand inside the soft white cotton. The hard flesh scorched his palm. Wrapping his hand around Rich’s length, he stroked from the base to just below the crown. Heat flushed through Dan as temptation proved too much.

Moving his hand to the elastic waistband, he tugged the material.

Rich helped by pushing the waist of his jeans down, capturing his briefs as he went. His erection popped free of restraints.

Dan slid to his knees. Face-to-face with the object of his dreams, he hesitated. A lifetime of being straight, of being taught what he wanted to do was wrong, fought against breath-stealing desire.

Rich’s hand cupped his chin then tugged his face upward. “You don’t have to do anything. We can wait.” The hard flesh contradicted his soft words.

Shaking free of Rich’s hold, Dan leaned forward. The tip of his tongue trailed up the thick vein on the underside of Rich’s cock. Masculine musk added to his desire. He flattened his tongue against the leaking tip.

A burst of bitter flavor danced across his taste buds. The silken head teased his tongue. Slipping his lips around the tip, he suckled.

A groan from above encouraged him to take more of the hard flesh into his mouth.

Fingers combed through Dan’s hair in a tender gesture.

Dan pulled back, swiping his tongue against the slit before swallowing more. A slow rhythm developed—short, shallow but steady.

“Dan…” The gentle hands grew tight on Dan’s scalp. “I’m gonna—”

Releasing Rich, Dan buried his face in the nest of dark hair. “Not yet.” His arm wrapped around Rich’s lean hips. “Not this way.”

Rich’s hands rubbed Dan’s shoulders and back. “Come here.” Rich pulled him from the floor. His hard lips pressed against Dan’s. Hands pushed his sweats over his ass. Fingers kneaded his flesh.

“Need you…” Dan’s moaned words slipped past Rich’s oral assault.

A loud groan interrupted the kiss. Rich turned Dan around then pushed him on the bed.

A flurry of hands caressed Dan’s body. Light touches, kisses and licks wandered from his neck to his groin. Dan’s sweats tangled around his feet. A quick kick freed his legs. He spread his legs wide, heels on the edge of the bed.

Rich took quick advantage of Dan’s position. His mouth suckled the tip of Dan’s cock before heat engulfed his length.

As he arched up toward his lover’s hungry mouth, Dan ran his fingers through Rich’s hair. “Shit…” His body was so primed for Rich’s touch. Need whirled through him with a roar.

A wet finger pushed against his opening, breaching the tight ring of muscle. The slow burn didn’t dampen his cock’s enthusiasm. If anything, the rough probing intensified Dan’s desire.

“Rich…” His fingers tightened on Rich’s head as his body exploded with extreme ecstasy. His legs wrapped around Rich’s back as his lover drank his gushing seed.

His tension flowed out of him with his orgasm. All doubts about Rich’s role in his life fled. He loved Rich without question. Sex was only part of his need for the man between his legs. Whatever obstacles lay ahead didn’t matter. They’d face them together.

“Rich…”

Brown eyes met his gaze.

“I want you. Now…” Easing his legs away from the tight grip around Rich, he held out his hand.

Nodding, Rich moved up Dan’s body. “We should probably wait until we have something better for lube than hand lotion.”

Dan couldn’t stop the flush of heat rising from his chest to his face. “Look in the back of the nightstand drawer…under the junk stuffed in there.”

With a half smile on his face, Rich followed Dan’s instructions. Fumbling in the back of the drawer, he pulled out a small bottle of anal lube. His eyebrows arched but he didn’t ask.

Part of Sharon’s sexual armory left behind after the breakup. Not something he wanted to think about at the moment. “I’ll explain later.”

“Along with the dreams.” Rich grinned and set the lube on the nightstand. He grabbed a condom from the box in the drawer then placed it beside the lube. “Get up for a minute.”

Dan scooted off the bed. Standing in the chill air, he waited while Rich tugged the covers back.

Crawling into the sheets, the contrast between the cold linen and the warm spot where he’d lain across the bed sent a shiver through Dan’s body. One the cold had nothing to do with.

Rich must have misinterpreted his actions because he tossed the covers over him. He toed off his shoes then stripped his jeans and underwear.

His gaze glued to Rich’s lean body, Dan’s cock stirred with renewed interest.

Rich slipped under the covers. His cool body dissipated some of Dan’s warmth.

Soft kisses and gradually warming hands distracted him. Dan pulled back so he could see Rich’s face. He ran a finger across Rich’s injured lip. “It’s more swollen. You shouldn’t have…”

Rich kissed the tip of Dan’s finger. “Don’t care. Worth the discomfort.” He twisted around then snatched the lube from the nightstand. Dangling the bottle over Dan’s chest, he grinned. “But will you feel the same way?”

Rich’s question had multiple meanings—intended or not. The obvious being physical, but there were many levels of discomfort. The newness of a gay relationship, the anxiety of people finding out… None of it mattered.

“Yes…” Dan whispered. “Always.”

Rich’s grin slipped then he leaned in with a hard kiss. His arms wrapped around Dan, the bottle of lube poking Dan in the back. The kiss gentled with murmured words. “I can’t believe…” Rich’s arms tightened. “Until the accident, this was all just a fantasy, a dream.” He pressed his forehead against Dan’s. “Afterward, I realized I felt more than just lust… Jeremy had accused me of being in love with you years ago but I laughed it off.”

Hearing his rival’s name made Dan’s heart skip a beat. Things could have ended so different. “And were you? All this time?”

“I’m not sure when it changed.” A wide grin cracked Rich’s face. “I’ve always thought you were hot.” His grin turned to an exaggerated leer complete with wagging eyebrows.

Dan laughed but he couldn’t stop the flush of heat racing across his face. He caressed the side of Rich’s face.

“But when I fell in love…” Rich’s features softened as he shrugged. “I don’t know. When your cruiser rolled…” His voice cracked. He pressed gentle, loving kisses against Dan’s lips.

“I want you…” Need to be closer overwhelmed Dan. His cock hardened with the desire to feel Rich inside him.

Nodding, Rich held up the bottle of lube. “Turn on your stomach.”

Dan swallowed hard as he obeyed.

Kneeling beside Dan, Rich pulled the covers back.

Cool air blew a chill down Dan’s spine. Warm hands followed the same path, caressing and massaging. Just as Rich’s actions relaxed him, the snap of the lube top renewed his tension.

“Lube’s cold…” Rich whispered just behind Dan’s ear. “But it’ll warm up soon enough.”

His hot breath sent a shudder through Dan. The icy fingers teasing his ass made him jump. “Damn. That is cold!”

Rich chuckled but he didn’t stop the press of fingers.

One finger pushed against his passage then teased circles of slick lube.

Dan spread his legs wide then relaxed into the mattress. The gentle pressure only made him ache for more. Raising his hips, Dan tried to increase contact.

“Easy…” One of Rich’s hands rubbed Dan’s back. “We’re getting there.” Rich’s thick finger pushed inside. “I want you relaxed and open before we do anything else.”

With a sigh of relief, Dan rocked back into the intrusion. Pressing forward, he ground his cock into the mattress. Each successive move pushed Rich’s finger deeper. He moaned into the pillow. “More…”

More started with a burn of stretching muscles, but the increased pleasure surpassed the pain. The gentle rocking wasn’t enough.

Dan pushed to his knees, face still buried in the pillow. The position opened him wider. The two fingers plunged to meet his backward thrusts. And then they were gone.

“More lube.”

Turning his face toward his lover, he understood Rich’s terse growl.

Rich’s heavy cock wept with pre-come. The thick crown was almost purple with need.

Dan’s body tightened with a rush of anticipation. “No more fingers. Just fuck me…”

“No. Not that I’m braggin’ or anything but there’s a big difference between two fingers and my dick.”

“Yeah…I noticed.” Dan couldn’t tear his gaze away from Rich’s cock.

Icy lube soothed the quick reentry of Rich’s fingers. “I noticed you noticing. Stop looking at me like that or I won’t make it much longer.”

“Like what?” He lifted his gaze to meet Rich’s.

Rich’s brown eyes were almost black with desire. “Like you might eat me alive.”

Dan chuckled as he moved his hand toward Rich. “That could be arranged.”

“Don’t touch. I’m about to explode.” Rich smacked his hand.

“Then fuck me already.” Dan pushed hard against Rich’s hand.

“Damn…”

The third finger wasn’t gentle but Dan didn’t care. Desire hummed through his body. His cock ached with need. “Rich… Now…”

“Fuck…” The fingers disappeared. Rich leaned toward the nightstand then grabbed a condom. The bed rocked and swayed as Rich crawled around behind Dan.

Arching his ass toward Rich rewarded Dan with another groan from his lover and a smack on one cheek.

“I’m having enough trouble here.” The snap of the lube cap followed the rip of the condom wrapper.

Icy lube drizzled down the crack of Dan’s ass. “Fucking cold!”

“Yeah, hopefully it’ll cool you down a little.”

The chill was forgotten when the thick tip of Rich’s cock pushed against his hole.

Rich’s hand rubbed Dan’s lower back. “Don’t try to push back. Let me do the work. You could hurt yourself or me if you rush things.”

Dan nodded into the pillow. His dreams hadn’t been so involved. Of course he didn’t have anything in his subconscious to compare. It had always been like Sharon’s fingers—but bigger and more intense.

“Fuck…” Dan bit the pillow to muffle his groan. Bigger definitely. The burn of stretching exceeded everything before.

His cock lost interest fast, wilting in a hurry. Maybe this wasn’t one of his better ideas.

Rich stopped moving. His hand rubbed circles on Dan’s lower back and buttocks. “You okay?”

“Yeah…” He knew Rich would stop if he asked but it wouldn’t be fair. “More…”

Clenching the fingers of his uninjured hand in the pillow, he buried his face.

With torturous slow pumping moves, Rich pushed into him. The pain didn’t increase, but so far, it hadn’t gotten better either.

Then Rich brushed against his prostate. The intense spike of pleasure tore a gasp from Dan’s throat.

“You okay?”

Dan nodded although he didn’t speak. His teeth were tearing a hole in the pillow. Another move forward forced more pressure on the sweet spot.

Torn between the sweet ecstasy and the intense burn, Dan’s body didn’t know how to react. Another swirl of pleasure and his cock perked up. “More…”

Rich’s pelvis met Dan’s ass. “Can’t give you more than that.”

“Then move…” Dan needed the intense rush of pressure on his prostate.

Short, slow strokes lengthened. With each plunge the burn lessened and the pleasure multiplied.

His cock regained its former hardness. “Oh yeah…” Releasing the pillow, Dan slipped his hand underneath his raised body. Wrapping his hand around his aching flesh, he stroked to match Rich’s increasing pace.

Behind him, grunts combined with groans. “Won’t. Last. Long.”

His lover’s hoarse words tripped a wire on Dan’s libido. “Harder…”

With a harsh grunt, Rich obeyed, slamming into Dan with long, rough thrusts. His hands dug into the flesh of Dan’s hips. “Dan!”

Rich’s shout triggered Dan’s orgasm. Hot come spread across Dan’s hand. His body clenched around Rich’s thick cock.

Jerking, uneven thrusts slammed against Dan’s ass. Hands rubbed up and down Dan’s sweaty back.

Dan’s knees gave out and he slid forward onto his stomach. Rich followed, still inside him, until his body flattened Dan into the mattress.

“Damn…” Dan mumbled into the pillow.

“Better than the dreams?” Rich’s breath panted in Dan’s ear.

“Yeah…” In spite of the pain, in spite of the fear, the pleasure and the closeness to Rich was worth everything, anything.

“So…ya want to tell me about those dreams.”

The sticky mess under him wasn’t exactly comfortable. “Yeah…but only if you take the wet spot.”

Rich’s chuckle was infectious. The kisses he plastered on the side of Dan’s face were addictive.

Life would be different but Dan wouldn’t trade the world for Rich’s hot, sweaty embrace.

About the Author

By day, Shayla Kersten is a mild-mannered accountant. By night, she’s a writer of sexy romances. Torn between genres, Shayla writes erotic stories about hot heroes and their sexy women as well as hot men and their passionate heroes.

A native of Arkansas, Shayla spent four years in the Army as a missile specialist, stationed in Germany and Oklahoma. After her enlistment was up, she spent eleven years in New York City taking a bite out of the Big Apple. Even her love of theatre and the nightlife of the big city couldn’t cure terminal homesickness for the Natural State. In 1995 she returned to her roots in Arkansas.

Shayla now divides her time between her mother, her spoiled-rotten dogs, her dratted day job and her obsession—writing. And no, her mother doesn’t know what she writes. That’s between Shayla, her dogs and her readers!

Shayla welcomes comments from readers. You can find her website and email address on her author bio page at www.ellorascave.com.

Tell Us What You Think

We appreciate hearing reader opinions about our books. You can email us at Comments@EllorasCave.com.

Also by Shayla Kersten

Gaps in Your Soul

Hidden Force

Longing for Eternity

Past Lies

The Cost of Eternity

The Rememdiu

Discover for yourself why readers can’t get enough of the multiple award-winning publisher Ellora’s Cave. Whether you prefer e-books or paperbacks, be sure to visit EC on the web at www.ellorascave.com for an erotic reading experience that will leave you breathless.

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